Justine is a university student currently taking up Psychology. She always aims to share her ideas through writing about various subjects.
Single? Make the most out of it!
There is no doubt that being in a relationship is an amazing experience. The intimate cuddles, the emotional attachment, and the feeling of excitement of being together are just a few of the things that people can experience as a couple. Everybody who is in a relationship or who has been in a relationship knows the various benefits of having a significant person in their life with whom they share romantic feelings.
These benefits of being in a relationship, however, highlight the drawbacks of being single. Unfortunately, some people tend to focus on those drawbacks and see singleness as something to get rid of. This can be the reason why some people who have been in a relationship want to find a partner again after break-ups, and why some who never been in a relationship are eager to be in one. The butterflies and sparks of relationships make some people focus on the “loneliness” aspect of being single.
At some point, singleness may bring the feeling of loneliness and dullness, but it is not always the case. If you are tired of being single and you can not still find yourself in a relationship, you may want to consider looking at singleness the other way around. This article will talk about three ways that one can do to make the most out of their singleness. Before going through the list, you must know that the golden rule of being a happy single is loving yourself!
1. Strengthen Your Other Relationships
As social creatures, people do not exist for romantic relationships alone. You also have relationships with other people around you such as friendships and your family relationship. While you are single and free from romantic commitments, make more time to bond and have fun with other people around your circle. Go on a road trip with your friends, have a movie night with your family or go to karaoke with your colleagues. In everyday life, you can celebrate small or big wins with them, appreciate their efforts more often, show your gratitude and do them some favor.
Whether you like it or not, your time and attention for other people around you will decrease once you are a part of a couple. Spending more time with other people, especially with your family and closest friends, create stronger and lasting relationships.
Why is it important to create other relationships stronger? You can look at it as a lifetime investment. Not all romantic relationships last, that is the truth. Another truth, your relationships with your friends and family do. In singleness or not, you can always count on with people whom you created strong bonds with.
2. Pamper Yourself
Aside from spending time with other people, make sure to also spend time for yourself. Whether we are in a relationship or not, we sometimes end up forgetting about self-care due to a lot of responsibilities in front of us. While you are single, take the time and opportunity to pamper yourself more. Go out and see your favorite movie, receive a relaxing massage from a spa shop, get a makeover, eat from your favorite restaurant, buy and wear outfits that best represents you, buy the things that you always want to purchase, travel to your dream destination, etc. Yes, you deserve all these things.
Can not an individual do these things while in a relationship? They can, but most relationships can cause limitations. Some relationships can hinder us from doing things that can make us happy aside from the things that we can do as a pair. Being in a relationship is a way different story, you can do things that you can not do alone. However, we are more autonomous while we are single than while we are part of a pair. Your partner may not prefer your favorite movie genre or your dream destination, among other things. Financial constraints can also be one of the reasons that hinder some people from spending for themselves.
On the other hand, pampering yourself does not always have to be expensive. You can treat yourself by practicing daily self-care. If you do not have a self-care routine yet, singleness is a perfect time to develop one. You can spend a few minutes to a few hours of your day relaxing and read some books, meditate, drink a warm drink of your choice, listen to your favorite music, bond with your pet, spend time on your plants, do some skin-care routines, exercise, or cook a delicious meal for yourself. Since life can be really exhausting, spend time for yourself, relax, and achieve some peace-of-mind.
3. Learn More About Yourself
The idea of being a pair in a relationship can make people forget some part of themselves or prevent them from growing as an individual. In a relationship, the balance between the state of being part of a pair and growing as a separate individual is important.
Some people may have lost themselves from their previous relationships; some relationships are messed up because an individual feels incomplete, while some may not find a suitable partner because they do not know what they want. Singleness, however, is a great time to focus on yourself, grow, and discover more about yourself. As a single, exert some effort to know yourself more. Focus on the things that you like but to do but never tried, try some new things and activities, and step out of your comfort zone. This is the time of trial and error, and errors are definitely fine. By doing so, you may discover a new hobby that you never thought you will like. In my case, I discover a new skill in portrait sketches and I am able to focus on a hobby that I always love—writing.
During this time, you can also know your likes and dislikes – your personal preferences for various things. While you are still single, build a relationship with yourself and know “you” better. You can complete yourself and fill the gaps in you alone by knowing more about yourself. You can not expect someone to complete you because you complete yourself. Our partners must not complete us; they complement us.
Our life as a single person and our life in a romantic relationship are different. Both can make us feel different feelings and experience different things. Both have their own benefits and drawbacks for every individual. Hence, there must be no comparison whether what is better or not.
If you are tired of being single and romance is still far from your reach, face it instead and make the most out of it. Singleness is not a limitation but an opportunity. It is not a curse but a blessing in disguise. Make it a time to build stronger connections, find yourself, take good care of yourself, and know yourself better.
As a single for a long time, refocusing my mindset and loving myself first gives me an opportunity to be satisfied—a feeling that I thought I will only achieve with a romantic partner.
Experiences vary for everyone, but loving yourself can make a lot of difference for you and for the people around you. After all, it is all about love!
© 2021 Justine Louice Jiao
Claire Andrews on February 03, 2021:
What an amazing and refreshing read! I Needed this.