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11 Best Reasons to Stay Single

Updated on June 21, 2016

Joined: 5 years agoFollowers: 1,498Articles: 304
Fighting it out
Fighting it out | Source

What is the number one cause of divorce?

The number one cause of divorce is obvious. It's not about money, or about kids, or infidelity, or any other domestic issue. The number one cause of divorce is marriage, as more than half of all marriages end in divorce. Finally, more people are deciding to stay single or are waiting longer before plunging into the wacky world of matrimony.

Was it necessity that forced people to get married at age 14 in the early 1900s? What about as time went on? Was it brainwashing by parents and society that made marriage seem like the thing to do? Family and societal expectations? Or just a really bad habit? Marriage seems to be a habit that people can't seem to break, as many take the plunge more than once--multiple times, even. Why?

At least now kids are waiting longer before they tie the noose—I mean, knot. Is it culture that has taught us that we are supposed to get married after high school or college and blissfully settle down with our "soul mates" to have 2.5 children and a white picket fence--only for more than half of those matches made in Heaven to dissolve in bitter divorces years later?

Here are ten of the best reasons to stay single and do what you want to ensure your own happiness for the rest of your life. Oh, wait, there are eleven reasons. You get a bonus!


1. Your time is your own.

Imagine being able to do whatever you want whenever you want. In the middle of the day or the middle of the night--you decide what you will do. When you get home from work, you don't have to do someone's bidding or take care of someone else. You don't have to talk. You don't have to think. You can take a nap instead of having to talk to a magpie or cook for some slug. You can go straight from work to have drinks with friends and not have to let someone know—or worse—ask his or her permission!


Blah, blah, blah . . .
Blah, blah, blah . . . | Source

2. You have peace and quiet.

Imagine having all the peace and quiet that you desire. There’s no one blabbing in your ear first thing in the morning or last thing before your head hits the pillow. You don’t have to listen to the TV blaring or the music blasting—unless you want to!


3. You control the remote.

You don't have to fight over what to watch on television. Watch sports, watch soap operas, or watch the news. Heck, you can watch the Jerry Springer show if you want, or some other reality show like The Bachelorette without anyone making fun of you for wasting your time. Well, if you’re single, it’s your time to waste, anyway.


Bring on the fast food!
Bring on the fast food! | Source

4. You can eat what you want.

Or you don’t have to eat. It’s so easy to cook for yourself. Make a casserole and eat it all week. Grab a frozen TV dinner. Eat a fried egg sandwich.

Pick up some heart-clogging fast food. There are lots of healthy meals that you don’t have to cook. Cook if you want, or don’t if you don’t care to.


Late Night with Jimmy Fallon--my favorite late night television show!
Late Night with Jimmy Fallon--my favorite late night television show! | Source

5. You can stay up as late as you want.

Are you a night owl? Then go for it! Stay up until 3 in the morning and sleep until noon. What if you were a night owl stuck with an early bird who was up earlier than the crack of dawn? You may be ready to go to bed by 4 a.m., but you’re certainly not ready to get OUT of bed at that time of the morning. On the other hand, if you like to hit the pillow at 8 p.m. and get up with the birds to get that proverbial worm, then do it! There is no one to cramp your style!


My finances, slim though they may be . . .
My finances, slim though they may be . . . | Source

6. You can spend what you want

Haven’t you heard that fighting over finances is the number one cause of divorce? Well, actually we have already covered that fact that marriage is the number one cause of divorce, but we won’t belabor that point. When you’re single, you spend your money how you want.

7. You can control the thermostat.

You can enjoy the temperature you want. You can freeze out in the house or start your own sauna. Sleep as cold or hot as you want. Save money or waste money depending on how you control the heat and cold. The thermostat is yours!


8. You can keep your bad habits.

Are you a slob or a neat freak? Do you smoke? Do you drink too much? Do you leave the toilet lid up and the toothpaste cap off? Well, as long as you stay single, you can keep doing all of that. Keep leaving your shoes in the living room and throwing your underwear on the bedroom floor. There is no pressure to live up to someone else's expectations. What a load off!


Enjoy your pets: cats, dog, bird . . .
Enjoy your pets: cats, dog, bird . . . | Source

9. You can have as many pets as you want.

If you're a woman with three plus cats and the neighbor kids have started calling you the cat lady, that's perfectly okay. Your special someone can come visit them, leaving the fur and hair balls behind. If you're a man with man's best friend who drools everywhere and digs up a manicured yard, then never fear. You're the only one who has to deal with it. Just keep Bruno from slobbering all over your lady friends.

Fill you house with as many cats and dogs that you want. Hang a bird in the mix for some excitement! You can have a hamster, a ferret, and even a snake. Only you have to live with them. Only you.


10. You don't have to deal with in-laws.

Mother-in-law? Need I say more? There is no having to pretend, no having to get along. There’s no having to figure out where to go to make everyone happy during the holidays.


11. And the number one reason to stay single?

You won’t have to get a divorce! You won’t be a statistic and will save lots of money and heartache. Plus, you won't have to hear your family and friends tell you, "I told you so!"

According to CBS Evening News . . .

My guy, Mark, and me . . . :-)
My guy, Mark, and me . . . :-) | Source

Why do people get married?

Still, with all these reasons, people seem to be drawn to each other. Yes, even I. I must admit I like having someone, but I also like my singleness. Not just anyone, though. Let me make that very clear. I'd much rather be alone--which I have been most of my adult life--than be with someone just to be with someone. I want someone that I'm pretty compatible with and who brings something to my life.

I think I have the both of best worlds. Are my significant other and I married? No. Do we live together? No. Have we survived the test of time? Yes. Nearly ten years now! Committed. Yet we like to do our own thing, too. And we live only a mile and a half apart.

Living proof that singleness--even in relationships--works!


Feelings on Marriage and Singleness

How do you feel about your current marital status?

See results

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    • carol7777 profile image

      carol stanley 4 years ago from Arizona

      I had to read this and I am glad I did. Though I am happily married I could identify with a lot of this, My husband takes off for our boat about every few months for a few days..and I eat dinner in bed and do what I want. However he is easy to live around and I enjoy mostly everything I do. But I see your point and you write this very well.VOting UP and sharing of course.

    • rcrumple profile image

      Rich 4 years ago from Kentucky

      VL - Hilarious, but well thought out reasons. In 32 years of marriage, many of these have been minor problem areas that had to be worked through, and continue to be, especially the temperature setting in the house. Yet, we manage to gripe, be sarcastic, and compromise. That's really what it's all about, giving a little and getting a little in return. Plus, who wants to lose everything in a divorce? lol Great Job!

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 4 years ago

      I believe the number one cause for divorce is and has always been (selecting the wrong mate). This happens quite a bit when we have not done the introspective thinking to figure out who we are, what we want, and need in a mate. Finding someone who shares your same values and agrees with you on a strategy for building a future together is a challenge.

      The number one reason for staying single in my opinion is because you LOVE being single! Being married or single are (lifestyle choices). Part of being in a free society is having the ability to (choose) how you want to live your life. Why change if you're happy with where you are?

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Carol--Sounds like you have a cool marriage! I think that freedom in a marriage to do what you want to do probably helps a whole lot. Thanks for the input--and for sharing!

    • Just Ask Susan profile image

      Susan Zutautas 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

      I waited until I was 29 to get married. Took me that long to find someone that I wanted to marry. Next month it will be our 25th anniversary. I like being married but I do long at times for those single years for all of the reason you've listed above.

      Voting up +++ and sharing.

    • abbykorinnelee profile image

      Abigayle Malchow 4 years ago from Ripon Wisconsin

      1..No one hogs your blankets

      2...Not falling into the toilet in the middle of the night because the toilet seat was up

      3...No facial hair stuck all over the sink from them shaving

      4...Not having to wear nighties...you can wear your flannels

      5...No 24 ESPN

      6...No snoring that shakes the house

      7...Chick Flick Marathon's

      8...You can have single female friend slumber parties like when you were a kid

      9...You don't feel guilty when that guy in Magic Mike's taking off his clothes and you say OMG

      10...No worrying who he is texting at all hours making you a P.I day and night

      11...No Penthouse subscriptions or Maxim in the mailbox staring at you making you feel frumpy

      12...You can cry whenever you want and you don't have to apologize for your PMS

      12...You don't have to sooth his ego whenever your paycheck is bigger than his

      13...None of his baby's momma's drama

      14...No child support payments in the way

      15...and just plain knowing you don't have to impress anyone

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Crump! (okay, tell me now if you don't like that nickname!)--Thanks for the input! Sounds like you two have it down. Maybe if I had married young, I would have also done such a thing. :-) Thanks so much for the input!

    • fpherj48 profile image

      Paula 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

      Vee.....This is a winner! I love this, girl. You can definitely state your case, extremely well. It makes me proud of you, to know that you have figured out what you like and want...and do not want...and are quite content with your choices. Good for you, Vee. Too many women (and men) are not as smart or able to reason out their options!

      I guess I better tell you, I too have the best of worlds.....and of course, you know I'm married. Perhaps it's our unique relationship, maybe our age at this point in life....we've been married 12 yrs. now......but, as a married woman, I am able to go down your entire list and say that I am free and able to do all of those things as well. We both are, actually. So, I'm either lucky or maybe a little smart too.....Jim and I married the right people? OH...except for #10.....if our parents were still living...they'd all be in the late 90's or even 100.....they may not even KNOW us! probably wouldn't be a big problem...ya think?? LOL

      Effer! that was not nice! G R E A T hub, Vee.....UP++++

    • Kathleen Cochran profile image

      Kathleen Cochran 4 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

      I've always said it's not about finding that one person who can make you happy. It's about avoiding all the people out there who can make you miserable.

      Married 36 years to the same man. We've had our ups and downs. I'm grateful we stuck it out for the good times we are enjoying now. Besides, it's been mostly good. But we're lucky.

    • Jeannieinabottle profile image

      Jeannie InABottle 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD

      There really are so many reasons to remain single. However, I've been single pretty much my whole life and, after a while, it does get boring. I am not saying I want to be married, but it would be nice to have someone that could potentially figure out how to fix things, kill spiders, and contribute money to rent. Oh well. There are positives and negatives to anything. Great hub and voted up!

    • writer20 profile image

      Joyce Haragsim 4 years ago from Southern Nevada

      If I had read your when I was with my husband I would totally agree with you and your hub. But I have been very lucky to find a great man.

      Voted up and awesome, Joyce.

    • justateacher profile image

      LaDena Campbell 4 years ago from Somewhere Over The Rainbow - Near Oz...

      Love this! I am happily married to my second husband and have to deal with much of what you list. Fortunately for my husband I decided that HE is much more important than all that "stuff." I have only been single for about two years and enjoyed the benefits, but love being with Hubby!

    • RealHousewife profile image

      Kelly Umphenour 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      Ok so...I am still weirded out by the tradition of marriage - although I have been married for 14 years (to the SAME guy:) lol I was married very young (22) and divorced after 2 years. I was NEVER going to marry again. I don't see the point...if you love each other what difference does that paper make? NONE!

      So Dave and I dated for 5 years, got engaged and married two years later. Now I loved the ring, but I wasn't really actually going to get married again...it seems so dumb! What would change (except our taxes?) I got pregrant with Sydney and Dave is really old fashioned so I relented because he wanted our kids to have his name in whole. I do get that so I put on a nice outfit and took that plunge again!

      Dave is the perfect guy for me though so whatever you want to call it - we coexist happily! Marriage is real hard though - I won't lie about that. Anytime you must live with anyone 24/7 you will have conflicts to resolve. If you can do that together that is half the battle. Sometimes people fight so much because nothing ever changes. Then you get the DE-Vorce!

    • myangel621 profile image

      Daniele Albanese 4 years ago from Milford, Delaware

      I have been on both sides. Married/Divorced and remarried again. I enjoyed that alone time but also missed the comfort of someone else when I was alone. What I do not understand is that the elder generation did marry young and stay together forever. It does seem like the new generation has a hire divorce rate. I remember when I was pregnant at 19 and not married a co worker had said to me, "that's the way to do it you don't need to get married." If I would have known then what I know now I wouldn't of got married but I was in love and I was expecting a child. I think my parents divorced so was I intended for divorce. Oh well the second time around I must say has been wonderful and I would marry my current husband all over again because god I loved our wedding cake, lol I love him too for eternity. Daniele

    • grumpiornot profile image

      grumpiornot 4 years ago from South Africa

      Frankly, your pictures are magnificent - the sketches brought the message of each section home better than anything else you could have sourced. Enjoyed your article and enjoyed a good laugh.

    • stillwaters707 profile image

      stillwaters707 4 years ago from Texas

      I loved your list and abby's too. Singleness provides many freedoms and D I V O R C E is P A I N F U L. Thanks for validating being single.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      dashingscorpio--You may be right about choosing the wrong mate, but why do so many long-term marriages turn sour after ten, twenty, thirty years? You're right, too, about loving being single. That's a great reason to be single, too! :-) You have great insight in your comments. Thanks so much.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Just Ask Susan--25 years! That's great! I'm sure you could come up with a list of reasons to get married, too! Pros and cons on both sides. Thanks for the input--and for sharing!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      abbykorinnelee--What an awesome list! You could write your own hub! If you do, let me know, and we'll link them. This is soooo cool!! Thanks!

    • literatelibran profile image

      literatelibran 4 years ago from Williamsburg, Virginia

      Number eight made me LOL. No self-improvement necessary! What an insightful, funny list!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Effer! Glad you like this! I do love being single, although I do really love my guy! Sounds like you have a good thing going there. If I ever get married, we're going to need a huge house with separate wings for our separate things. Once I told him that he needed to buy the house next door, and we could build a walkway between our two homes. :-) Great idea, huh? Gosh, I really do love being alone and doing my own thing.

      You're funny. Yeah, the parents would be a non-issue as they probably wouldn't even remember who you are. LOLOLOLOL! :-)

    • writer20 profile image

      Joyce Haragsim 4 years ago from Southern Nevada

      I was talking about my first husband. Joyce

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Kathleen--That's a great saying! And it does sound like you are very fortunate. That's awesome! Thanks for commenting.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Hi, Jeannie! I've always been single, but i'm in a committed relationship but not married. I think that's a great combo! Maybe I'm lucky to have that. He does fix things for me sometimes, but I kill my own spiders. :-) You're right in that there are positives and negatives to anything. :-)

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Joyce, that's great! Many people find what they're looking for the second (or third or fourth!) time around. I read your second comment, too. I figured it was a first husband that you were talking about. :-)

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      justateacher--I'm glad you found that with your second husband! I'm glad you liked my hub, though, too! Thanks!

    • fpherj48 profile image

      Paula 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

      Good Grief...NO!! Buying the house next door is too close! You have a great thing going...."If it ain't broke, don't fix it!!" Stick a picture of your man, who you love, in your hub so we can all see him!! You've never been married? and Has he?.......Leave it be. Sounds like you truly treasure your own space!

      Oh speaking of space.....I forgot to tell you ...hubby and I live in a 12 room house.....on an acre plus....no neighbors.....so we have space..peace and quiet and lots of room to roam....sometimes, we don't even know if the other one is home!! We're both retired, but run a hoppin business together from home.... LOL!!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      You're so funny, RealHousewife, Kelley! You're weirded out by the tradition of marriage, but are probably the best wife AND housewife and mom! I agree that the paper makes no difference (except perhaps to make things worse--LOL). I'm glad you found Dave to take the plunge with. I hope you make it until you're old and gray! Thanks for the WONDERFUL comments!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      EFFER!!!! I added a photo of us. Hope you like it! He has been married a few times, but I haven't. It works for us!

      Your arrangement sounds wonderful. A huge house with some acreage, a workshop outdoors for my man--I might consider it, too--haha! :-) Working from home . . . But could I keep all my bad habits, like my hub says? LOL!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      myangel621--Thanks for sharing your story. I wonder if the older generation stayed together because it was expected, miserable or not. I don't know if that's good or not . . . ? I am glad that you are having a wonderful marriage second time around. Good wedding cake makes it all worth it. hahaha! Thanks, Daniele!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      grumpiornot--That is the greatest compliment about my sketches! I'm no artist but am trying to use original photos or drawings wherever I can. I'm so glad you like my silly little sketches! Glad anytime I can make someone laugh, too! :-)

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      stillwaters--I definitely don't want to go through a divorce. I can't imagine. And most people who get married do go through it, so why chance it? Thanks for validating my validation about being single. :-)

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      literatelibran--Glad I made you LOL! haha. I should be insightful as long as I've been single. :-) Thanks for the great input!

    • go-barbara-go profile image

      go-barbara-go 4 years ago

      Wow...Number 8! Haven't thought about that for a reason...but I definitely agree to it now and begin to think that's my number 1 reason. Lol!

      Thank you for this. Wonderful!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Go, barbara, go! I agree, too! It's too much trouble to change bad habits--especially if it's for someone else!!! :-)

    • Astralrose profile image

      Astralrose 4 years ago from India

      I'm married for 5 years now and I'd learned (still learning) a lot about it. The number one lesson I learned and I would like to share is that, we need NOT lose our freedom to do what we want, things we have been doing before just because we are married, which is why it's very important to talk all the issues that matter to us before marriage. If a person hasn't found somebody who share his/her interests, goals in life, beliefs in many things, values, principles, etc then he/she is better off alone.

      Number 8, I observed, causes many problems in marriage. The husband wants to continue smoking but the wife wants him to quit. (A situation that prompts me to write a hub, "Other Things To Consider Because of Health). And mostly it ends in hiding, spraying mouth with mint so it doesn't smell smoke/cigarette. And hiding isn't a good idea of good marriage.

      I'd rather suggest, stay single and make lots of good and nice friends. :-)

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Astralrose--Great advice! I admire people who can make marriage work and who enjoy it. There are just so many things to work out, and sometimes, like Number 8, it causes conflict. Thanks for the input!

    • Lord De Cross profile image

      Joseph De Cross 4 years ago

      This was cool! Mark? I hope he is really good to you and Gizmo. Great reasons and you forgot another one! You can watch the Super Bowl and not being able to get interrupted by a "flashing" partner. (joking)

    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 4 years ago from Wales

      A great read.

      Eddy.

    • rfmoran profile image

      Russ Moran 4 years ago from Long Island, New York

      I voted this up and funny (I love your tongue in cheek humor) even though I am happily married and wouldn't change that ever, till death do us part. Yes, divorce is incredibly common, but a large part of it is a lack of commitment, and a refusal to tolerate the small crap. Having a life to share and someone you can always talk to trumps the single life in my opinion.

    • Glimmer Twin Fan profile image

      Glimmer Twin Fan 4 years ago

      I love being married, but there are many days when I remember my single days with longing. How I loved my little condo and my cat. Ah well, marriage has it's perks too! Fun hub!

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

      I've been there, done that and single I will always be. Hee.. Enjoyed reading your hub..Voted interesting and funny...

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Yes, Lord, Mark is good to us. He treats Gizmo to french fries! Do you have that problem with the Super Bowl? haha Great to see you!

    • xstatic profile image

      Jim Higgins 4 years ago from Eugene, Oregon

      This is a great one Victoria! I have been married more than once, was not going to again, but three years into this one and five years together, it is working well. Each of us is free to be ourselves, yet we get along really well together. Conversations at dinner stretch out for an amazingly long time. I think communications and having things in common has a lot to do with it.

      Love those sketches!

    • Ruchira profile image

      Ruchira 4 years ago from United States

      Such a funny hub, vicki.

      Agree with all the above reasons. Lol

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Thanks, Eddy. Glad you enjoyed it!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      rfmoran--I loved your comments. Glad you liked my humor. I'm glad you're happily married. I do have someone to share things with; I just don't know if we could live together. LOL. Im quite the loner and don't like to talk much, so maybe that's why the single life fits me so well. :-)

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Glimmer Twin Fan--I'm sure there are pros of marriage, too! Thanks for the input!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      always exploring--so glad you liked it and thought it was funny! Yippee!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      xstatic--Being able to be yourself as well as communicate are key things to keep a relationship going. Sounds like you found a great thing! I'm so glad you love my sketches! They were fun to do!

    • teaches12345 profile image

      Dianna Mendez 4 years ago

      I voted married and love it, but still find your points ones I miss at times. Once in a while, when I have some alone time, it's nice to have the remote all to ourself, to eat what you want and to do what I want. Once in awhile . . . :)

    • catgypsy profile image

      catgypsy 4 years ago from the South

      Absolutely love this, Victoria! I've been married, twice, and would not want to do it again...well, unless he was a billionaire and wanted to live in separate houses...haha! I'm too spoiled now to want to have to adapt my life to someone else. And yes, I'm the neighborhood cat lady! Will definitely share this!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Thanks, Ruchira! Glad you like it!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      teaches--I'm glad you're happily married--and hopefully you get that alone time now and then. Thanks for reading!

    • lovedoctor926 4 years ago

      With the high rate of infidelity and divorce these days, I think these are all very good reasons to stay single. Great hub!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      catgypsy--A billionaire in separate houses would be great!! Yes, it's hard to adapt one's life to another's, especially when used to living alone for so long. Being a catgypsy, you HAVE to be a cat lady! :-)

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      ElSeductor--Thanks for the great comments. I hope your sibling's marriage lasts! I'll have to check out your hubs. Thanks for the votes!

    • hawkeye49er profile image

      hawkeye49er 4 years ago

      Yes, its nice to be single but it's a lot better to be married to someone who cares about and thatwill Love you. Unconditionally no matter. the outcome.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      lovedoctor--With a name like yours, you would know! Thanks for reading and commenting!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      hawkeye49er--I can see how that would be true. I guess I like my alone time too much! I do have a great guy, though! thanks for reading and commenting! :-)

    • Beth100 profile image

      Beth100 4 years ago from Canada

      You've hit it on the nail -- marriage on a piece of paper holds very little meaning. Marriage is a commitment of the heart - whether living together or sharing your lives together. The only institutions gaining from paper marriages is the government -- can they think of more things to tax?!?

      You sound happy -- as you should be as you've found what works for you. Congratulations!! If more people could be truthful to themselves, there would be more happy relationships in this world!!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Beth100--Great comments! Yes, I'm happy in my relationship, having found something that works very well. :-)

    • DrMark1961 profile image

      DrMark1961 4 years ago from The Beach of Brazil

      This was so great! I have another one to add (a bit weird, I will admit)

      -You can let your baby geese sleep in the shower stall every night.

      (Try finding a spouse that would allow goose droppings all over the bathroom floor every morning. She would immediately cite the number one reason for divorce, and the geese would be number two.)

      Voted up and sharing. Thanks!!!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
      Author

      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      DrMark--A "bit" weird? I would say your geese issue is much more than a little weird. LOL. I agree with you on what a spouse would think about the droppings. And I'm assuming this is a true situation of yours? Love it! LOL. :-)

    • dingerd profile image

      Darrel Dinger 4 years ago from Tennessee

      Marriage can be very good for some people and very bad for others. I personally love being married to my wife. I get my space when I want it and I basically get to do whatever I want. I know not every marriage is like mine but I'd have to say that marriage is good for me.

    • DrMark1961 profile image

      DrMark1961 4 years ago from The Beach of Brazil

      I call them my ecologically sound (or extremely frugal, take your pick) lawnmowers. They mow the lawn, leave great compost material, and eventually will lay eggs. Sounds like a great hub, right?

      Of course they have to grow up, and while still small they´re sleeping in my bathroom, leaving little packages all over the tile.

      It is a good thing I am single!!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      dingerd--Sounds like you have a good arrangement! That's wonderful. I say go with whatever works! :-)

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      DrMark--For sure! Write a hub about the benefits of having your own geese--even if they do leave droppings in the bathroom. LOL. I can relate (somewhat) as I keep a cat in the bathroom occasionally that I am bringing into the family to get used to the other cats. Yeah, I know, not quite the same thing! :-)

    • Aaron_Perks profile image

      Aaron Perks 4 years ago from United Kingdom

      I'm seeing a lot of views from people here that have been married, or are married. I can't imagine being married a bad thing. I have been with my partner for nearly three years and wouldn't dream of getting married yet. We've both said settling down is an old mans game. I'd prefer to do what I want, or at least compromise. I know if I was single, i wouldn't have to compromise, but being made to do something I wouldn't do opens your eyes to new concepts & ideas, going out of your comfort zone. One of the main reasons I like being with someone, someone to talk to all hours of the day, best friend and partner in one.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Hi, Aaron! Great comments! Thanks! I guess I'm more of a loner. I don't like having anyone around all the time, and I don't like to talk much. So, having a significant other who just lives a mile and a half away works perfectly for me! I can see some benefits of marriage, but I see being single but having someone, too, as being the best of both worlds. Actually, marriage might be okay, as long as we live in our own houses. LOL! Thanks for the input! :-)

    • TToombs08 profile image

      Terrye Toombs 4 years ago from Somewhere between Heaven and Hell without a road map.

      This was excellent, V! My favorite was #2. :) I love seeing your lighter side! :) Shared a little here and there. ;)

    • Angelo52 profile image

      Angelo52 4 years ago from Central Florida

      I live with my partner. She and I have been together over 13 years and are not officially married. I was married officially twice. Both ended in divorce at about 7 years, the last one badly. Seems to me that being "married" creates expectations, which when not fulfilled lead to divorce.

      Great article. Accolades and sharing.

    • Crystal Tatum profile image

      Crystal Tatum 4 years ago from Georgia

      I love this hub. I agree that staying single is preferable to entering into marriage without proper forethought and willingness to make the necessary commitments and compromises. I've written my own hub "A Single Woman's Rant" about society's prejudices regarding single women over a certain age. These are particularly alive and well in the good ole South, where I live. Voted up and awesome.

    • Wesman Todd Shaw profile image

      Wesman Todd Shaw 4 years ago from Kaufman, Texas

      Do you smoke? Do you drink too much? Do you leave the toilet lid up and the toothpaste cap off?

      1.yes

      2.yes

      3.yes.

      4. NEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      You had me at "tie the noose" :)

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Thanks, T! Gotta be light sometimes (although my reasons are totally serious!). Glad you liked it! That's a great compliment coming from you!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Angelo--Great input about what happens with "expectations." Thanks for sharing your thoughts--and my hub!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Crystal--I've glad you love the hub. I need to read your rant--sounds great! Thanks for the votes, too.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      LOL, Wesman! That's all I can say. Your comment is priceless. :-)

    • Nyamache profile image

      Joshua Nyamache 4 years ago from Kenya

      This is really interesting. Another reason why people decide to remain single is to avoid the kind of abuse their married friends undergo. Although being single has got its advantages also being married has its own advantages. I am not sure if those who make decisions of being single do not feel lonely since human beings are social creatures who have got feelings. It is upon a person to decide to be single or to get married.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Nyamache. I've never felt lonely. I have pets, and I see my boyfriend on the weekends and occasionally see family and friends. Still, others want people around more. Yeah, I agree; it depends on the person. Thanks for commenting!

    • Minnetonka Twin profile image

      Linda Rogers 4 years ago from Minnesota

      Victoria Lynn-The title had me and I enjoyed every piece of it. I think it's great that you share your experience of not tying the not but being whole and happy-Societal rules and traditions can make it hard to be different. I have never married and it was by choice. I enjoy male companionship but just love my independence and never met anyone that makes me yearn for anything different. I have it made now that I've been living with my twin sister and raising her two kids after her divorce. We have slumber parties every night. LOL

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Minnetonka Twin--I'm so glad you enjoyed the hub! The single life is a great one for people like us! Slumber parties every night sound fun. Sounds like you have a good thing going! Thanks for stopping by!

    • Vincent Moore 4 years ago

      What a wonderful, delightful hub on reasons to stay single. I must confess I stayed single till I was 27. Thought I met the love of my life and got married for the first time, divorced after 4 years no children. Met my second and stayed married for 19 years producing 4 children. If I had known at the time I met her that I married a fatal attraction and a parnoid jealous nut case, I certainly would never have married a second time. It was a costly divorce financially, physically and mentally. I am still feeling the wrath of this divorce 14 yrs after the divorce. I am single entering my senior years and will remain so until my dying breath, however I would definitely consider the type of relationship you have. Your place or mine, but don't overstay your welcome. LOL Yes indeed I love all the reasons for staying single and I apply most of them:-0). Now to find a soulmate that I can love from a distance is the trick? Any takers? lol Voted Up, awesome and brilliant and shared.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Vincent, thanks for your thoughtful comments. 19 years is a long time; it's sad that it ended so badly. I'm aware of some of the horrible times you've survived and still struggle through. Maybe you'll find that soulmate to share some things with--just not the same house! :-) I'm fortunate in that I have the best of both worlds. Thanks for stopping by, and thanks for the votes and share. Take care, my friend.

    • tattuwurn 4 years ago

      Except for #'s 7 and 9 (which simply I couldn't relate), I can say yes to all of the reasons. I'm a single woman, have not been in a relationship for six or seven years, but I have come to realize the benefits of staying single.

      Another reason: no kids of my own to be responsible for. Don't get me wrong, I love my little nieces, I love spoiling them. But that's just about it. I don't have to encounter the stress of raising kids just as their parents have! ;)

      Great hub, Victoria! Voted up. :)

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      tattuwurn--Good points about the kids. I've enjoyed my nieces and nephews all these years without having to raise them!!

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

      Excellent points Vicki, I truly like how your mind works. To each his own. I like being married, on most days! ;)

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Sunshine--Thanks for the compliment. I'm not dissing marriage, either. Whatever works, huh? Who knows? Maybe one day my guy and I will tie the know. We'd have to have a really huge house though, with plenty of space for my cats! :-)

    • gmwilliams profile image

      Grace Marguerite Williams 4 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York

      Great hub, marriage is not for everyone despite subliminal societal messages that "everyone should get married" and "something is somewhat 'wrong' with a person if he/she chooses to remain single". There are some people who want to be single. They love their independence, do not have to answer to anyone but themselves, and/or totally explore whom they really want to be.

      So many people get married because of the societal impetus that "mature, stable" people are to be married. Even though they would be happier being single, they are somewhat pressured to be in a marital relationship. Women, especially, even in this postmodern age, are told that they are totally insignificant with a man.

      So many people are in love with the IDEA of marriage that they rush into marriage, much to their utter regret later on. Marriage is something not to enter into lightly, it revolves much compromise and responsibilities that many people are not willing to assume. That is why the divorce rate is so high. If people were more serious and thoughtful regarding marriage, there would be less divorces.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      gmwilliams--What wise comments! I think you are right on target about societal expectations as well as people's attitudes toward marriage and divorce.. Thanks for reading and leaving such insightful comments.

    • B. Leekley profile image

      Brian Leekley 4 years ago from Kalamazoo, Michigan, USA

      Up, Useful, and Interesting. My wife and I would live near each other instead of with each other if we had the money for two rents. Given that we are sharing a 1-bedroom apartment, we have a deal that when she wants the place to herself, she just says, and I leave for an afternoon or evening. I can write hubs anywhere. She's working, and I'm retired, so I get more than my share of being on my own in the apartment.

      I was a bachelor for 52 years and soon will have been married 18 years, and I've liked the married years better.

      Not all of your 11 reasons would be applicable in the case of a single parent.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      B.Leekley--It sounds like you've made your arrangement work. That's great! Yeah, you're right about the single parents out there. Maybe I should have specified single and childless! Thanks for the input, and congratulations on a happy marriage!

    • Pamela Kinnaird W profile image

      Pamela Kinnaird W 3 years ago from Maui and Arizona

      This hub is hilarious. My favorites are Reason 9 and Reason 7. And you've been a very busy lady! 253 hubs! Wow.

      Voting up, funny and sharing.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Pamela--I'm so glad you like this hub. I had fun writing it! Yes, busy, busy. There were some month that I really got after writing hubs. Some months were much slower. It's amazing how they add up! Thanks for reading and commenting, and for all the vote and shares!

    • moonlake profile image

      moonlake 3 years ago from America

      I've been married over 50 years and wouldn't want it any other way. My husband was gone for a few days last week and you would not believe the people that ask me if I was worried about being by myself. I wasn't worried it was kind of nice a little time alone I could do what I wanted, eat when I wanted. My husband is easy going but he gets bored when he's not working and that drives me a little crazy because I don't get bored. Voted up on your hub.

    • Sanxuary 3 years ago

      You named a lot of the things I would have written. The reason for divorce is the inability to build a life together. It always feels like marriage becomes a self entitlement program. Being single at-least allows you to be entitled to something. After a divorce you become better at knowing what you want. When I know a date is not going anywhere, I love to sabotage myself completely. Trust me you can have a really good time with this one.

    • Stephanie Henkel profile image

      Stephanie Henkel 3 years ago from USA

      I love your article, and your drawings are wonderful! You've certainly hit on some of the biggest reasons for dissension in marriage. As someone who has been married for over 50 years, I can tell you that most of these issues can be worked out if you're with the right person (o.k., maybe not the remote thing), but there are always some compromises. The trick is finding the person who can agree with you on which compromises are worth making. It doesn't matter if you are married or unmarried, if you are in a successful relationship, you have to consider the other person's needs as well as your own.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      moonlake--I guess people worry about those who are used to having someone around. It's funny that men seem to get bored more easily than women. That sounds like my mom and stepdad. It seems that women always have things to do. Thanks for your comments!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Sanxuary--You are so insightful! And funny! I love what you said about sabotaging yourself on a bad date. That's hilarious. Thanks for your comments!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Stephanie, I'm glad you like the drawings! I had fun with them. True about having to consider the other person's needs. I honestly don't know if anyone could live with me, though, at this point in my life. Maybe when I was younger, I would have taken to it okay. I have a long-term relationship, but it's nice that we have our own places. Thank so much for your comments!

    • TIMETRAVELER2 profile image

      TIMETRAVELER2 3 years ago

      This is a cute article with which I mostly disagree. I knew a couple that lived together for 20 years in a committed, but single, relationship. One day he left her for another woman whom he married within the year! Yes, marriages fail, but it isn't because of marriage. I wrote a major hub about getting married that basically states that marriages fail because people marry the wrong individuals for the wrong reasons. End of story...but cute hub, none the less

    • Oscarlites profile image

      Oscar Jones 3 years ago from Alabama

      IN most ways the woman I was married to was wonderful , when things were good between us.. things were right. but when they got bad, and when they went wrong, hold your hosses. everybody got hurt. but it was enough years that you were devastated. end of the world. ( at least for a long time.) the one that leaves and moves on quickly is the lucky one.. the other one gets hurt and stays hurt. we are all made different. it IS hard to want to try again. but if the rigth one showed up and I really was took with her, hmm... theres a chance.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      TimeTraveler--So true about people marrying the wrong people, or perhaps moving in with the wrong people. :-) I totally agree that is a big cause of divorce. And it's true that sometimes people do meet someone and marry them right away (hopefully it lasts!) With me, I'm committed; I just don't see the need to live in the same house. There are so many reasons that I just prefer not to. Why mess up a great relationship? So I guess I'm not really single--just living apart. :-) Thanks for your input. Enjoyed it.

    • lovedoctor926 3 years ago

      :Marriage seems to be a habit that people can't seem to break, as many take the plunge more than once--multiple times, even. Why?"

      I found this part funny, but it's true though. what makes you think that if it failed twice it will work out the third time around? These days, more men are opting for all the benefits without any strings attached. How convenient right? These are all good reasons to stay single. I agree with your views. A lot of it has to do with parental expectations & the status quo. My parents have been pressuring me to get married for a long time as if that depended on me. Most single men are not looking for a relationship. They only want to have sex period. Divorce men, on the other hand, bring a lot of baggage and God forbid they ever get married again! These are all good reasons to stay single and I've been following these principles for sometime now.

    • wileyspeaks profile image

      Anna 3 years ago from Auburn, Indiana

      It is a great hub. I have known many of my friends who married early and got divorced 1-5 years later. I waited until I was 26 to get married. I have 7 years of being single and going out with the girls, dated lots of guys and had a relationship or two. However, it was one morning after going out, I woke up and decided this wasn't what I wanted anymore. I didn't want to go out with the girls 3 nights a week and live alone. I wanted to be with someone and grow old with them. I wanted to do it for myself but I say that looking at my grandparents and seeing what an amazing marriage they had really got me thinking I want that. Once I decided on it I started looking for men that were more worthy to settle down with I changed my perspective and hence ended up with a wonderful man. It was hard at first and there still are adjustments but you know what love is worth it, and I guess in my mind marriage is more then a piece of paper it is a mindset, it is a lifestyle, it is a vessel that holds your love within it. However, just because marriage works for me it doesn't mean it is for everyone. You got to do what makes you happy, life is too short to not keep yourself happy.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Oscarlites--I know; when it's bad, it's bad. You're right, though. You never know what might happen if the "right" one shows up!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      I hear ya, lovedoctor! I don't see why people keep trying it over and over. Is marriage that awesome? Evidently not. LOL. I love living alone, staying single, while my boyfriend of 9 years lives 1 1/2 miles away! The best of both worlds. Thanks for the input. Maybe your parents will give up on the idea at some point. :-)

    • kellysgirl profile image

      Mrs Campbell 3 years ago from Atlanta, GA

      This was indeed a cute article, a lot of which I can definitely relate. However (because there's always an However - lol), marriage has its sustainable perks. The number one thing to remember is, your spouse should be your friend. My husband and I would have probably been divorced long ago but for the fact that I love him dearly and he, in fact, is my very best friend. He's the girlfriend I always wanted, which is why I can get disgusted with him and still be madly in love.

      You are right though, marriage is not for everybody. We are too quick to turn off the 'in sickness and in health' commitment when the going gets too too tough. Marriage is like politics, when it works - it really works; when it doesn't work, you can't give up on it, you have to battle it out until you come up with a mutual solution.

      Marriages evolve all throughout a couple's life, and both spouses have to be great change agents capable of migrating those rough waters. At the end of the day, your spouse is a testament of your life in a way that no other individual can be. They are your mirror and the trick is, you have to like what you see every time you look into it.

    • lovedoctor926 3 years ago

      Victoria, that is pretty awesome! Have you ever been married? What if your boyfriend proposed? I would suppose that if somebody really special came along, I might consider it, but I still haven't found my soulmate.

    • lovedoctor926 3 years ago

      There are soul mates and twin souls. I don't know whether there's a soulmate out there for everyone. Some people claim they have found it. Who knows. lol. Have a good night.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Wileyspeaks--Thanks for the thoughtful comments! Ya know, I wouldn't mind being married to my guy. It's the living together part that I think might ruin the relationship. I love living alone, especially since I'm messy and he's neat. I just don't think it would work. I am amazed, though, and impressed, with those that it does work for. Thanks again!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      kellysgirl--What great, insightful comments. Thank you so much for sharing the good side of marriage, why it is worth it. For some people, at least. LOL. Thanks so much!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      lovedoctor--No, I haven't been married. My BF has several times. If he proposed, I could say yes as long as we didn't live together. heehee. I told him before to buy the house next door when it came up for sale. Really, I'm too messy for him. I have too many cats, too. I'm a night owl, and he's an early bird. Our relationship works great, I think. We're great friends and love the heck out of each other. Why ruin that by changing things? Marriage is not the end-all, right?

      Like you, I don't know about soulmates. How do you know if a person is your soulmate or not? And I certainly don't think there's just one person out there for someone. What if your "person" got killed before you met? Know what I mean? Anyway, I hope you see this again. I enjoyed talking with the lovedoctor!!!! :-)

    • Chris Ferguson 3 years ago

      Okay here's my thing with marriage, I really don't agree with it or really not for it. Simply because in a marriage, you two have to learn how to work things out while being together. Who will work, who will take care of the kids, how intimate can you really be towards one another. If the both constantly agree over silly, childish things, it will not work between the both of you. You can't just fight and say I love you at the same time. Which is it going to be ? If you are going to get or the be married. Both of you have to change your ways of how you think about life towards each other. Especailly if the kids are involved and won't have to put an effect on them throughout their lives.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      writeframeof mind--You are so right;t here's so much to work out. Changing the mindset has to happen if it's going to work. Thanks for your insightful and thoughtful comments.

    • ytsenoh profile image

      Cathy 3 years ago from Louisiana, Idaho, Kauai, Nebraska, South Dakota, Missouri

      Victoria, long time no talk. I was so amused by this hub. Thanks much! My theory is always that where there is no mutuality and understanding and acceptance, there is no forever, period. So many women conditioned to get married, have children, and become self-sacrificing for 20 years...love your images too, especially the "blah-blah-blah." Thanks for the late night amusement.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      ytsenoh--Yes, good to see you again! I think that mutality and understanding are rare, and, even then, it's not easy. Forever is rare, for sure. Women are definitely conditioned to have families when there are so many more things to life--so many more options. To each her own, though! I'm glad you like the images. They were fun to do! Thanks for reading!

    • lovedoctor926 3 years ago

      I love your description of this wacky world of marriage. Lol. What I love the most about being single is that my time is my time. How liberating is that! I don't have to report to anyone. I come in and out as I please and don't have to worry about cooking, cleaning or doing anyone's laundry other than for myself. You are so right! Forever is rare for sure!

    • James-wolve profile image

      Tijani Achamlal 3 years ago from Morocco

      Interesting and amazing hub.I respect your opinion,it s well-based,but I think the bottom line is that there is green grass on either side of the single or not single fence. My friends with girlfriends and wives are jealous of my freedom, and I'm jealous of their great relationships. The key to remaining happy whether you're single or not is to celebrate the great things about being single or not single. And, try to be happy no matter what situation you're in because chances are you'll be on the other side of the fence at some point.Up

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Oh, yes, lovedoctor, I love my time! And I have lots of it. I don't know how I'd survive otherwise. It's awesome. I might have forever with my guy, but it's probably going to be down the street! :-)

    • ooquendo 3 years ago

      Very good hub, Victoria. I don't know if I see myself being single forever. Don't get me wrong, being single is great, but dating someone you really care about is an incredible feeling. Throughout this past month, I've been going out with an awesome woman. We have a lot of things in common. I'm doing my best to make things work with her because I really care about her. A great woman is hard to find nowadays. At any event, this was a great hub.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      James-wolve--You make a great point, but the stats show that the grass really is greener on the single side! There are so few married folks who really celebrate that. I celebrate my long-term relationship but am glad we don't have to live together. LOL. I don't envy the other side of the fence at all, and I'm sure there are a few married folks who feel that way, too! To each our own. I'm glad you appreciated the hub!

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      ooquendo--Hi! Oh, I didn't say anything about not dating. I have a long-term relationship. We see each other on weekends, sometimes during the week, but we have our own homes just 1/1/2 miles apart. It's great! That doesn't mean that marriage is the next step. Why ruin a good thing? :-)

      I'm glad you have found a great relationship. I know what you mean.

    • Ausseye 3 years ago

      Hi VictoriaMarrigeLean:

      Victoria and John Brown is the role you are attesting to, close but distant enough to give him a medal for services rendered. A deliciously wicked hub that has me leaning towards divorce, yes it’s a hippy generational thing, but alas I love my other better one way too much, rather pitiful isn’t it. Freedom is a notion that most of human kind doesn’t really experience, yet yes, we all pretend to. Like the Victoria of old, making the other your servant seems a good option.

      Na the key moments together are sublime, wouldn’t trade them for anything but we didn’t need to be married to experience it, took us 20 years to decide to actually get married. It was the law and its disregard for living together relationships, the iceberg that sunk the ship of co-existence, destroyed the notion of free love and hippy idealism. Now you advocate the hippy way? Mind you a kiss at the right moment in life is always pure bliss, and if your not around at that moment it is lost forever, out in the vast universe searching space for that other real moment. I wonder if other life form in the universe are getting marring? Love to go to an earthly Elephant wedding, we’d all get trunked and have a merry time, or does that start with a d.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Ausseye--You have quite the way with words! I enjoyed reading your insights and reflections!

    • beingwell profile image

      beingwell 3 years ago from Bangkok

      Your photos are adorable, victoria! haha! It's like I'm reading from a comic page of the paper. Interesting thought on marriage, or divorce, or being single. It's a calling, I believe. We all have our roles to play.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      beingwell--That's a great point--what you said about having a calling, whether it's being married or single. Cool insight. I'm glad you liked the photos/drawings. I enjoyed doing them. :-)

    • AmandaJon profile image

      Amanda Jones 3 years ago

      Your opinion is very interesting. But I still think it's better to enjoy life together with your loved ones.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      AmandaJon--I do like time with my loved ones, just not living together. LOL. I guess, being an introvert, I just need lots of alone time. It makes the time when my bf and I do get together more special since we don't have to put up with each other's living habits. :-) Whatever works is what I say! :-)

    • cam8510 profile image

      Chris Mills 3 years ago from Colorado Springs, CO until the end of March

      Thanks for the interesting and entertaining hub. I am one who has been married before. I am a widower and prefer to remain single at this point. I know others who, like yourself, have built a solid relationship without marriage or living together. Maybe that will be my future. Who knows. Thanks for the good read.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      cam8510 Time will tell. What works for one in a relationship may not work for another. Good luck in however it turns out!

    • Camelia Najnin 3 years ago

      I did love marriage at the age of 19 . We had to face so many financial problems & disagreements of our families . The families hated each others & never forgave us or allowed us to enter into their homes. Soon , My husband & I also started quarelling & the love disappeared . Eventually we got divorced after 2 years . People in my society hate me cause they think I am loser as I divorced my husband . I believe that I was correct . What's the point of being together if there is no comfort zone for me or him either ? Now I wish to remain single for rest of my life . I am only 23 now . But people around me always divert me saying how would I spend my life being single ? That's why I hate all the people who suggest me so , they never helped me when I was facing problems in my married life , not a free advice either . I love being single , love manipulating my own life . But I feel to have a boy friend but don't want to marry him .I am scared of beinf bounded & mainly getting divorced !!

      I really loved your article .

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Camelia--Thanks for sharing your situation. That must have been hard. So many people don't understand the desire to stay single, but it sounds like you do. Many people who marry are unhappy or get divorced eventually, anyway. I love manipulating my own life, too. It's nice to have a boyfriend, but it's also nice to have my own space away from him. I'm glad you liked my article. I hope you are happy, whether you remain single or decide to get married one day.

    • realtalk247 profile image

      realtalk247 3 years ago

      Sounds nice but don't forget the silence of being by yourself constantly. No one to help you if you get sick or cheer you up. Valentine's day , by yourself at dinner, and holiday dinner without a husband/wife and kids to take around family.

      Every marriage does not end in divorce and unhappiness. One must just choose carefully. If your heart and mind match, and you commit to submission to a higher power then all is good.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      realtalk247 - I love the silence of being by myself. I don't mind eating alone. I actually enjoy it. And Valentine's Day has never been my favorite holiday, even when I'm with someone. I enjoy my family time with my parents and brothers and nieces without having to worry about my own family. I have a long-time boyfriend, but we don't live together or even see each other every day. I think I have the best of both worlds. :-) But to each his or her own. :-)

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      Paula 3 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

      Vee......I'm back....I just read everything all over again! Your hub and every comment.....I love this just as much the second time....

      g.m's comments are great...she makes all the sense in the world.

      Actually I had to snicker, because of how many times I've heard, when people know someone is in their 30's or 40's and have NEVER been married.....the auto-response is: "Hmmm wonder what's WRONG with him/her?" LOL I never fail to say, "They must be pretty damned SMART!"........

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      Effer! Back from the long visit? Welcome! That's cool that you read this and all the comments, too. I went over some of them again myself; there are some great ones! GM's, too! I know that "What's wrong with him/her?" gets me. Nothing's wrong with someone who decides not to join the masses. :-) I always thought when I was younger that I would get married, but that's just an expectation of society. Once I hit my early 30s, I was over it!

      Anyway, great to see you Effer! I'll see you around, girl!

    • realtalk247 3 years ago

      Victoria Lynn

      I enjoy myself and am comfortable doing things on my own. Restaurants, movies, art work, book signings, lectures, and events.

      However no one wants to do everything alone consistently. It's nice to have companionship sometimes.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 3 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      realtalk247 I agree! it's the sometimes, not ALL the time, makes being single but having a significant other a perfect combination!

    • Casey White profile image

      Dorothy A Casey McKenney 2 years ago from United States

      Funny stuff...couldn't have said it better myself (and believe me, I DO say it often)...lol

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 2 years ago from Arkansas, USA

      LOL Casey! I do have a long-term dating relationship, but I don't see any reason to marry! I'm glad to find a like mind! Thanks for the input. :-)

    • Truth 7 weeks ago

      Stay single, stay alive, stay healthy.

    • Victoria Lynn profile image
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      Vicki L Hodges 5 weeks ago from Arkansas, USA

      Preach it, Truth! :-)

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