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11 Best Reasons to Stay Single

Victoria Lynn has been single for most of her adult life, and has kept up that independent attitude even while in a relationship.

What is the number one cause of divorce?

The number one cause of divorce is obvious. It's not about money, or about kids, or infidelity, or any other domestic issue. The number one cause of divorce is marriage, as more than half of all marriages end in divorce. Finally, more people are deciding to stay single or are waiting longer before plunging into the wacky world of matrimony.

Was it necessity that forced people to get married at age 14 in the early 1900s? What about as time went on? Was it brainwashing by parents and society that made marriage seem like the thing to do? Family and societal expectations? Or just a really bad habit? Marriage seems to be a habit that people can't seem to break, as many take the plunge more than once—multiple times, even. Why?

At least now kids are waiting longer before they tie the noose—I mean, knot. Is it culture that has taught us that we are supposed to get married after high school or college and blissfully settle down with our "soul mates" to have 2.5 children and a white picket fence—only for more than half of those matches made in Heaven to dissolve in bitter divorces years later?

Here are ten of the best reasons to stay single and do what you want to ensure your own happiness for the rest of your life. Oh, wait, there are eleven reasons. You get a bonus!

1. Your time is your own.

Imagine being able to do whatever you want whenever you want. In the middle of the day or the middle of the night—you decide what you will do. When you get home from work, you don't have to do someone's bidding or take care of someone else. You don't have to talk. You don't have to think. You can take a nap instead of having to talk to a magpie or cook for some slug. You can go straight from work to have drinks with friends and not have to let someone know—or worse—ask his or her permission!

2. You have peace and quiet.

Imagine having all the peace and quiet that you desire. There’s no one blabbing in your ear first thing in the morning or last thing before your head hits the pillow. You don’t have to listen to the TV blaring or the music blasting—unless you want to!

3. You control the remote.

You don't have to fight over what to watch on television. Watch sports, watch soap operas, or watch the news. Heck, you can watch the Jerry Springer show if you want, or some other reality show like The Bachelorette without anyone making fun of you for wasting your time. Well, if you’re single, it’s your time to waste, anyway.

4. You can eat what you want.

Or you don’t have to eat. It’s so easy to cook for yourself. Make a casserole and eat it all week. Grab a frozen TV dinner. Eat a fried egg sandwich.

Pick up some heart-clogging fast food. There are lots of healthy meals that you don’t have to cook. Cook if you want, or don’t if you don’t care to.

5. You can stay up as late as you want.

Are you a night owl? Then go for it! Stay up until 3 in the morning and sleep until noon. What if you were a night owl stuck with an early bird who was up earlier than the crack of dawn? You may be ready to go to bed by 4 a.m., but you’re certainly not ready to get OUT of bed at that time of the morning. On the other hand, if you like to hit the pillow at 8 p.m. and get up with the birds to get that proverbial worm, then do it! There is no one to cramp your style!

6. You can spend what you want

Haven’t you heard that fighting over finances is the number one cause of divorce? Well, actually we have already covered that fact that marriage is the number one cause of divorce, but we won’t belabor that point. When you’re single, you spend your money how you want.

7. You can control the thermostat.

You can enjoy the temperature you want. You can freeze out in the house or start your own sauna. Sleep as cold or hot as you want. Save money or waste money depending on how you control the heat and cold. The thermostat is yours!

8. You can keep your bad habits.

Are you a slob or a neat freak? Do you smoke? Do you drink too much? Do you leave the toilet lid up and the toothpaste cap off? Well, as long as you stay single, you can keep doing all of that. Keep leaving your shoes in the living room and throwing your underwear on the bedroom floor. There is no pressure to live up to someone else's expectations. What a load off!

9. You can have as many pets as you want.

If you're a woman with three plus cats and the neighbor kids have started calling you the cat lady, that's perfectly okay. Your special someone can come visit them, leaving the fur and hair balls behind. If you're a man with man's best friend who drools everywhere and digs up a manicured yard, then never fear. You're the only one who has to deal with it. Just keep Bruno from slobbering all over your lady friends.

Fill you house with as many cats and dogs that you want. Hang a bird in the mix for some excitement! You can have a hamster, a ferret, and even a snake. Only you have to live with them. Only you.

10. You don't have to deal with in-laws.

Mother-in-law? Need I say more? There is no having to pretend, no having to get along. There’s no having to figure out where to go to make everyone happy during the holidays.

11. And the best reason to stay single?

You won’t have to get a divorce! You won’t be a statistic and will save lots of money and heartache. Plus, you won't have to hear your family and friends tell you, "I told you so!"

Why do people get married?

Still, with all these reasons, people seem to be drawn to each other. Yes, even I. I must admit I like having someone, but I also like my singleness. Not just anyone, though. Let me make that very clear. I'd much rather be alone—which I have been most of my adult life—than be with someone just to be with someone. I want someone that I'm pretty compatible with and who brings something to my life.

I think I have the both of best worlds. Are my significant other and I married? No. Do we live together? No. Have we survived the test of time? Yes. Nearly ten years now! Committed. Yet we like to do our own thing, too. And we live only a mile and a half apart.

Living proof that singleness—even in relationships—works!

Feelings on Marriage and Singleness

Questions & Answers

Question: Do you often feel you'll die alone because you're staying single?

Answer: No, I don't. I have lots of family and friends. I guess people often do die alone when unexpected things happen, but I don't think about it. Being married doesn't ensure that a person won't die alone. Things happen.


Opting out on February 13, 2020:

Modern feminism has ruined everything. Women want to be modern when it comes to work and career but they want to be traditional when it comes to dating and the expectations of a husband in general, and women want to be VERY traditional when it comes to a divorce. I say I pass and to any sensible young men in the West: Stay single, work on your education and career, and team up with other bachelors. One good thing about feminism: Sex is cheap and no relationship is needed. Other than that, women: You are on your own, but that's what you wanted anyway!

Reality Check on April 25, 2019:

Well for many of us smart single men which MGTOW is the real way for many of us to go now since Feminism is everywhere.

Cackus on February 28, 2019:

I was pulling out of a parking garage yesterday, a women pulled her SUV in front of me. I'm driving really cautious caus I just bought my dream car and am in the new car fear stage lol.

I noticed her back tire was really flat. I caught up with her at a traffic light and got her attention, I yelled to her that she had a flat tire.

Now I have met this person before as she is a coworker but didn't know her name.

She pulled into a side street but going in the other lane I had to circle the block to park and help her.

She couldn't get the lugs off but I noticed her valve stem was loose and I have an air compressor in my car so I got it and started inflating her tire for her.

All the while thoughts like "I hope she doesn't think I'm interested in her" and " I hope she isn't afraid of me." Etc were running through my head.

Here I am , helping someone out, I would have done the same for anyone, and 24 hrs later I'm still feeling like stopping and helping was a mistake simply because it was a women my age.

John Doe on February 17, 2019:

Women have certainly changed today from the past unfortunately since they really are more spoiled, greedy, selfish, picky, and money hungry now which certainly has a lot to do with it, making love very difficult to find for many of us single good men still looking. Back then, love came very easy with no problem at all either. Have to really blame the women today for that one since it really does take two to tango today.

DW Davis from Eastern NC on December 29, 2018:

My sons are both still single and I encourage them to stay so in the world as it is today. While I have been happily married to their mother for over 30 years, today's world is nothing like the world was when we wed.

I also encourage them to remain childless, married or not. There is nothing in the world of the 21st century worth bringing a child into it.

Amu on August 26, 2018:

i like being single I have never been married iam turning 31 02 september ,Sometimes iam dating but most of the time I'm alone and not lonely

MARIA t DE JESUS on August 19, 2018:

I celebrate June 30th since 1989 divorced and happy can do as I wish. Just got back from a criuse from Alaska Holland America do as I wish .

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on August 21, 2017:

Hi realtalk! I never liked to meet people at bars no matter my age. LOL! I've always been independent. I don't need anyone to go to the doctor with me or cook for me or go out to eat with me since I don't like eating out much anyway. I know that a lot of people do want someone, and I may change my mind as I get older. Time will tell. I've only recently turned 50, and after getting out of a 12 year relationship two years ago, I can't imagine putting up with another one at this point in my life. Maybe when I'm old and gray! As I said, time will tell. Best of luck with you in whatever situation you're in! Thanks for the input!

realtalk247 on August 20, 2017:

Good points for celebrating being single. I do believe that life is about changes and stages. Some people love the single life and will die doing whatever they want when they want-enjoying freedom. Yes you don't have to risk financial destruction, you can play king of the remote control, and you answer to no one. The only thing is after a certain age who wants to be at the bar/club with people 1/2 your age? The greatest achievements in life require sacrifice but in the end it seems worth it.

To each their own and you make great points about being single but at 50, 60, 70 does one really live not to have control of the remote and come and go as you please? Who's going to go to the doctor with you when you get older or help prepare dishes for your health. Who wants to eat at Applebee's alone? IJS

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on August 20, 2017:

Ben, I'm not sure that women have changed for the worst or that anyone has. I do think that people don't try as hard to stay together. Perhaps the couples in the past, too, stayed together more whether they were happy or not. At any rate, many people do want love again. The article was meant to be kind of funny, but I do think the reasons to stay single are true for many people. It's just easier in so many ways. To each his or her own. I do hope you find what you're looking for. Thanks so much for reading my article and for your input.

Ben on August 06, 2017:

But what about many of us good innocent men out there that really hate to be single and alone all the time which can be very depressing, especially when most of our friends are all settled down which they just happened to be very blessed by God to have met their loved ones. I will admit as a single man that use to be married which my Ex wife unfortunately turned out to be the real low life pathetic loser that i never knew since she Cheated on me. I was a very good husband by the way since i really have no reason at all to blame myself to begin with since i was very faithful, loving, caring, and very committed to her as well. But you what, it still wasn't good enough for her at all either. It is very unfortunate that this has happened to other men as well since i know friends that had the very same thing happened to them as well. Even God has no control over a woman that is destined to Cheat which is very sad that many women nowadays are like this unfortunately since they would certainly deserve to be punished by God for Ruining many of us good innocent men's lives like this. And now to go out all over again and to deal with this trying to meet another good woman this time is very extremely difficult for us since are age is certainly very much against us too. Since i am in my early sixties which i am certainly looking for a woman more my age anyway which makes more sense to me since Most other men would want a much younger woman these days. I hate going out since it is like looking for a needle in a haystack or trying to win the lottery today which the odds unfortunately are very much against us men trying to find love again. And it has certainly become very extremely dangerous for many of us men now seriously looking since most of the women that we will try to start a conversation with just Don't have any respect at all for us men since many of the women these days have really Changed for the Worst of all adding to the problem as well. In the old days real love came very easy the way that it happened for our family members since they were very obviously blessed to be born at that time which even today as i speak many of our family members are still together now as i speak which is very amazing. It was just too very bad that many of us men weren't born back then since we definitely would've Avoided this mess today.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on December 13, 2016:

Preach it, Truth! :-)

Truth on November 29, 2016:

Stay single, stay alive, stay healthy.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on February 11, 2014:

LOL Casey! I do have a long-term dating relationship, but I don't see any reason to marry! I'm glad to find a like mind! Thanks for the input. :-)

Mike and Dorothy McKenney from United States on February 11, 2014:

Funny stuff...couldn't have said it better myself (and believe me, I DO say it often)...lol

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on January 19, 2014:

realtalk247 I agree! it's the sometimes, not ALL the time, makes being single but having a significant other a perfect combination!

realtalk247 on January 18, 2014:

Victoria Lynn

I enjoy myself and am comfortable doing things on my own. Restaurants, movies, art work, book signings, lectures, and events.

However no one wants to do everything alone consistently. It's nice to have companionship sometimes.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on January 08, 2014:

Effer! Back from the long visit? Welcome! That's cool that you read this and all the comments, too. I went over some of them again myself; there are some great ones! GM's, too! I know that "What's wrong with him/her?" gets me. Nothing's wrong with someone who decides not to join the masses. :-) I always thought when I was younger that I would get married, but that's just an expectation of society. Once I hit my early 30s, I was over it!

Anyway, great to see you Effer! I'll see you around, girl!

Suzie from Carson City on January 07, 2014:

Vee......I'm back....I just read everything all over again! Your hub and every comment.....I love this just as much the second time....

g.m's comments are great...she makes all the sense in the world.

Actually I had to snicker, because of how many times I've heard, when people know someone is in their 30's or 40's and have NEVER been married.....the auto-response is: "Hmmm wonder what's WRONG with him/her?" LOL I never fail to say, "They must be pretty damned SMART!"........

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on January 07, 2014:

realtalk247 - I love the silence of being by myself. I don't mind eating alone. I actually enjoy it. And Valentine's Day has never been my favorite holiday, even when I'm with someone. I enjoy my family time with my parents and brothers and nieces without having to worry about my own family. I have a long-time boyfriend, but we don't live together or even see each other every day. I think I have the best of both worlds. :-) But to each his or her own. :-)

realtalk247 on January 06, 2014:

Sounds nice but don't forget the silence of being by yourself constantly. No one to help you if you get sick or cheer you up. Valentine's day , by yourself at dinner, and holiday dinner without a husband/wife and kids to take around family.

Every marriage does not end in divorce and unhappiness. One must just choose carefully. If your heart and mind match, and you commit to submission to a higher power then all is good.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on December 06, 2013:

Camelia--Thanks for sharing your situation. That must have been hard. So many people don't understand the desire to stay single, but it sounds like you do. Many people who marry are unhappy or get divorced eventually, anyway. I love manipulating my own life, too. It's nice to have a boyfriend, but it's also nice to have my own space away from him. I'm glad you liked my article. I hope you are happy, whether you remain single or decide to get married one day.

Camelia Najnin on December 06, 2013:

I did love marriage at the age of 19 . We had to face so many financial problems & disagreements of our families . The families hated each others & never forgave us or allowed us to enter into their homes. Soon , My husband & I also started quarelling & the love disappeared . Eventually we got divorced after 2 years . People in my society hate me cause they think I am loser as I divorced my husband . I believe that I was correct . What's the point of being together if there is no comfort zone for me or him either ? Now I wish to remain single for rest of my life . I am only 23 now . But people around me always divert me saying how would I spend my life being single ? That's why I hate all the people who suggest me so , they never helped me when I was facing problems in my married life , not a free advice either . I love being single , love manipulating my own life . But I feel to have a boy friend but don't want to marry him .I am scared of beinf bounded & mainly getting divorced !!

I really loved your article .

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on November 27, 2013:

cam8510 Time will tell. What works for one in a relationship may not work for another. Good luck in however it turns out!

Chris Mills from Traverse City, MI on November 27, 2013:

Thanks for the interesting and entertaining hub. I am one who has been married before. I am a widower and prefer to remain single at this point. I know others who, like yourself, have built a solid relationship without marriage or living together. Maybe that will be my future. Who knows. Thanks for the good read.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on April 26, 2013:

AmandaJon--I do like time with my loved ones, just not living together. LOL. I guess, being an introvert, I just need lots of alone time. It makes the time when my bf and I do get together more special since we don't have to put up with each other's living habits. :-) Whatever works is what I say! :-)

Amanda Jones on April 26, 2013:

Your opinion is very interesting. But I still think it's better to enjoy life together with your loved ones.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on March 29, 2013:

beingwell--That's a great point--what you said about having a calling, whether it's being married or single. Cool insight. I'm glad you liked the photos/drawings. I enjoyed doing them. :-)

beingwell from Bangkok on March 29, 2013:

Your photos are adorable, victoria! haha! It's like I'm reading from a comic page of the paper. Interesting thought on marriage, or divorce, or being single. It's a calling, I believe. We all have our roles to play.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on March 22, 2013:

Ausseye--You have quite the way with words! I enjoyed reading your insights and reflections!

Ausseye on March 21, 2013:

Hi VictoriaMarrigeLean:

Victoria and John Brown is the role you are attesting to, close but distant enough to give him a medal for services rendered. A deliciously wicked hub that has me leaning towards divorce, yes it’s a hippy generational thing, but alas I love my other better one way too much, rather pitiful isn’t it. Freedom is a notion that most of human kind doesn’t really experience, yet yes, we all pretend to. Like the Victoria of old, making the other your servant seems a good option.

Na the key moments together are sublime, wouldn’t trade them for anything but we didn’t need to be married to experience it, took us 20 years to decide to actually get married. It was the law and its disregard for living together relationships, the iceberg that sunk the ship of co-existence, destroyed the notion of free love and hippy idealism. Now you advocate the hippy way? Mind you a kiss at the right moment in life is always pure bliss, and if your not around at that moment it is lost forever, out in the vast universe searching space for that other real moment. I wonder if other life form in the universe are getting marring? Love to go to an earthly Elephant wedding, we’d all get trunked and have a merry time, or does that start with a d.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on March 11, 2013:

ooquendo--Hi! Oh, I didn't say anything about not dating. I have a long-term relationship. We see each other on weekends, sometimes during the week, but we have our own homes just 1/1/2 miles apart. It's great! That doesn't mean that marriage is the next step. Why ruin a good thing? :-)

I'm glad you have found a great relationship. I know what you mean.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on March 10, 2013:

James-wolve--You make a great point, but the stats show that the grass really is greener on the single side! There are so few married folks who really celebrate that. I celebrate my long-term relationship but am glad we don't have to live together. LOL. I don't envy the other side of the fence at all, and I'm sure there are a few married folks who feel that way, too! To each our own. I'm glad you appreciated the hub!

ooquendo on March 10, 2013:

Very good hub, Victoria. I don't know if I see myself being single forever. Don't get me wrong, being single is great, but dating someone you really care about is an incredible feeling. Throughout this past month, I've been going out with an awesome woman. We have a lot of things in common. I'm doing my best to make things work with her because I really care about her. A great woman is hard to find nowadays. At any event, this was a great hub.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on March 10, 2013:

Oh, yes, lovedoctor, I love my time! And I have lots of it. I don't know how I'd survive otherwise. It's awesome. I might have forever with my guy, but it's probably going to be down the street! :-)

Tijani Achamlal from Morocco on March 10, 2013:

Interesting and amazing hub.I respect your opinion,it s well-based,but I think the bottom line is that there is green grass on either side of the single or not single fence. My friends with girlfriends and wives are jealous of my freedom, and I'm jealous of their great relationships. The key to remaining happy whether you're single or not is to celebrate the great things about being single or not single. And, try to be happy no matter what situation you're in because chances are you'll be on the other side of the fence at some point.Up

lovedoctor926 on March 10, 2013:

I love your description of this wacky world of marriage. Lol. What I love the most about being single is that my time is my time. How liberating is that! I don't have to report to anyone. I come in and out as I please and don't have to worry about cooking, cleaning or doing anyone's laundry other than for myself. You are so right! Forever is rare for sure!

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on March 10, 2013:

ytsenoh--Yes, good to see you again! I think that mutality and understanding are rare, and, even then, it's not easy. Forever is rare, for sure. Women are definitely conditioned to have families when there are so many more things to life--so many more options. To each her own, though! I'm glad you like the images. They were fun to do! Thanks for reading!

Cathy from Louisiana, Idaho, Kauai, Nebraska, South Dakota, Missouri on March 09, 2013:

Victoria, long time no talk. I was so amused by this hub. Thanks much! My theory is always that where there is no mutuality and understanding and acceptance, there is no forever, period. So many women conditioned to get married, have children, and become self-sacrificing for 20 years...love your images too, especially the "blah-blah-blah." Thanks for the late night amusement.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on February 07, 2013:

writeframeof mind--You are so right;t here's so much to work out. Changing the mindset has to happen if it's going to work. Thanks for your insightful and thoughtful comments.

Chris Ferguson on February 06, 2013:

Okay here's my thing with marriage, I really don't agree with it or really not for it. Simply because in a marriage, you two have to learn how to work things out while being together. Who will work, who will take care of the kids, how intimate can you really be towards one another. If the both constantly agree over silly, childish things, it will not work between the both of you. You can't just fight and say I love you at the same time. Which is it going to be ? If you are going to get or the be married. Both of you have to change your ways of how you think about life towards each other. Especailly if the kids are involved and won't have to put an effect on them throughout their lives.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on January 31, 2013:

lovedoctor--No, I haven't been married. My BF has several times. If he proposed, I could say yes as long as we didn't live together. heehee. I told him before to buy the house next door when it came up for sale. Really, I'm too messy for him. I have too many cats, too. I'm a night owl, and he's an early bird. Our relationship works great, I think. We're great friends and love the heck out of each other. Why ruin that by changing things? Marriage is not the end-all, right?

Like you, I don't know about soulmates. How do you know if a person is your soulmate or not? And I certainly don't think there's just one person out there for someone. What if your "person" got killed before you met? Know what I mean? Anyway, I hope you see this again. I enjoyed talking with the lovedoctor!!!! :-)

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on January 31, 2013:

kellysgirl--What great, insightful comments. Thank you so much for sharing the good side of marriage, why it is worth it. For some people, at least. LOL. Thanks so much!

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on January 31, 2013:

Wileyspeaks--Thanks for the thoughtful comments! Ya know, I wouldn't mind being married to my guy. It's the living together part that I think might ruin the relationship. I love living alone, especially since I'm messy and he's neat. I just don't think it would work. I am amazed, though, and impressed, with those that it does work for. Thanks again!

lovedoctor926 on January 30, 2013:

There are soul mates and twin souls. I don't know whether there's a soulmate out there for everyone. Some people claim they have found it. Who knows. lol. Have a good night.

lovedoctor926 on January 30, 2013:

Victoria, that is pretty awesome! Have you ever been married? What if your boyfriend proposed? I would suppose that if somebody really special came along, I might consider it, but I still haven't found my soulmate.

Mrs Campbell from Atlanta, GA on January 30, 2013:

This was indeed a cute article, a lot of which I can definitely relate. However (because there's always an However - lol), marriage has its sustainable perks. The number one thing to remember is, your spouse should be your friend. My husband and I would have probably been divorced long ago but for the fact that I love him dearly and he, in fact, is my very best friend. He's the girlfriend I always wanted, which is why I can get disgusted with him and still be madly in love.

You are right though, marriage is not for everybody. We are too quick to turn off the 'in sickness and in health' commitment when the going gets too too tough. Marriage is like politics, when it works - it really works; when it doesn't work, you can't give up on it, you have to battle it out until you come up with a mutual solution.

Marriages evolve all throughout a couple's life, and both spouses have to be great change agents capable of migrating those rough waters. At the end of the day, your spouse is a testament of your life in a way that no other individual can be. They are your mirror and the trick is, you have to like what you see every time you look into it.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on January 30, 2013:

I hear ya, lovedoctor! I don't see why people keep trying it over and over. Is marriage that awesome? Evidently not. LOL. I love living alone, staying single, while my boyfriend of 9 years lives 1 1/2 miles away! The best of both worlds. Thanks for the input. Maybe your parents will give up on the idea at some point. :-)

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on January 30, 2013:

Oscarlites--I know; when it's bad, it's bad. You're right, though. You never know what might happen if the "right" one shows up!

Anna from Auburn, Indiana on January 30, 2013:

It is a great hub. I have known many of my friends who married early and got divorced 1-5 years later. I waited until I was 26 to get married. I have 7 years of being single and going out with the girls, dated lots of guys and had a relationship or two. However, it was one morning after going out, I woke up and decided this wasn't what I wanted anymore. I didn't want to go out with the girls 3 nights a week and live alone. I wanted to be with someone and grow old with them. I wanted to do it for myself but I say that looking at my grandparents and seeing what an amazing marriage they had really got me thinking I want that. Once I decided on it I started looking for men that were more worthy to settle down with I changed my perspective and hence ended up with a wonderful man. It was hard at first and there still are adjustments but you know what love is worth it, and I guess in my mind marriage is more then a piece of paper it is a mindset, it is a lifestyle, it is a vessel that holds your love within it. However, just because marriage works for me it doesn't mean it is for everyone. You got to do what makes you happy, life is too short to not keep yourself happy.

lovedoctor926 on January 29, 2013:

:Marriage seems to be a habit that people can't seem to break, as many take the plunge more than once--multiple times, even. Why?"

I found this part funny, but it's true though. what makes you think that if it failed twice it will work out the third time around? These days, more men are opting for all the benefits without any strings attached. How convenient right? These are all good reasons to stay single. I agree with your views. A lot of it has to do with parental expectations & the status quo. My parents have been pressuring me to get married for a long time as if that depended on me. Most single men are not looking for a relationship. They only want to have sex period. Divorce men, on the other hand, bring a lot of baggage and God forbid they ever get married again! These are all good reasons to stay single and I've been following these principles for sometime now.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on January 29, 2013:

TimeTraveler--So true about people marrying the wrong people, or perhaps moving in with the wrong people. :-) I totally agree that is a big cause of divorce. And it's true that sometimes people do meet someone and marry them right away (hopefully it lasts!) With me, I'm committed; I just don't see the need to live in the same house. There are so many reasons that I just prefer not to. Why mess up a great relationship? So I guess I'm not really single--just living apart. :-) Thanks for your input. Enjoyed it.

Oscar Jones from Monroeville, Alabama on January 29, 2013:

IN most ways the woman I was married to was wonderful , when things were good between us.. things were right. but when they got bad, and when they went wrong, hold your hosses. everybody got hurt. but it was enough years that you were devastated. end of the world. ( at least for a long time.) the one that leaves and moves on quickly is the lucky one.. the other one gets hurt and stays hurt. we are all made different. it IS hard to want to try again. but if the rigth one showed up and I really was took with her, hmm... theres a chance.

Sondra Rochelle from USA on January 29, 2013:

This is a cute article with which I mostly disagree. I knew a couple that lived together for 20 years in a committed, but single, relationship. One day he left her for another woman whom he married within the year! Yes, marriages fail, but it isn't because of marriage. I wrote a major hub about getting married that basically states that marriages fail because people marry the wrong individuals for the wrong reasons. End of story...but cute hub, none the less

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on January 29, 2013:

Stephanie, I'm glad you like the drawings! I had fun with them. True about having to consider the other person's needs. I honestly don't know if anyone could live with me, though, at this point in my life. Maybe when I was younger, I would have taken to it okay. I have a long-term relationship, but it's nice that we have our own places. Thank so much for your comments!

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on January 29, 2013:

Sanxuary--You are so insightful! And funny! I love what you said about sabotaging yourself on a bad date. That's hilarious. Thanks for your comments!

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on January 29, 2013:

moonlake--I guess people worry about those who are used to having someone around. It's funny that men seem to get bored more easily than women. That sounds like my mom and stepdad. It seems that women always have things to do. Thanks for your comments!

Stephanie Henkel from USA on January 29, 2013:

I love your article, and your drawings are wonderful! You've certainly hit on some of the biggest reasons for dissension in marriage. As someone who has been married for over 50 years, I can tell you that most of these issues can be worked out if you're with the right person (o.k., maybe not the remote thing), but there are always some compromises. The trick is finding the person who can agree with you on which compromises are worth making. It doesn't matter if you are married or unmarried, if you are in a successful relationship, you have to consider the other person's needs as well as your own.

Sanxuary on January 28, 2013:

You named a lot of the things I would have written. The reason for divorce is the inability to build a life together. It always feels like marriage becomes a self entitlement program. Being single at-least allows you to be entitled to something. After a divorce you become better at knowing what you want. When I know a date is not going anywhere, I love to sabotage myself completely. Trust me you can have a really good time with this one.

moonlake from America on January 28, 2013:

I've been married over 50 years and wouldn't want it any other way. My husband was gone for a few days last week and you would not believe the people that ask me if I was worried about being by myself. I wasn't worried it was kind of nice a little time alone I could do what I wanted, eat when I wanted. My husband is easy going but he gets bored when he's not working and that drives me a little crazy because I don't get bored. Voted up on your hub.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on January 28, 2013:

Pamela--I'm so glad you like this hub. I had fun writing it! Yes, busy, busy. There were some month that I really got after writing hubs. Some months were much slower. It's amazing how they add up! Thanks for reading and commenting, and for all the vote and shares!

Pamela Dapples from Arizona now on January 28, 2013:

This hub is hilarious. My favorites are Reason 9 and Reason 7. And you've been a very busy lady! 253 hubs! Wow.

Voting up, funny and sharing.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on January 17, 2013:

B.Leekley--It sounds like you've made your arrangement work. That's great! Yeah, you're right about the single parents out there. Maybe I should have specified single and childless! Thanks for the input, and congratulations on a happy marriage!

Brian Leekley from Bainbridge Island, Washington, USA on January 16, 2013:

Up, Useful, and Interesting. My wife and I would live near each other instead of with each other if we had the money for two rents. Given that we are sharing a 1-bedroom apartment, we have a deal that when she wants the place to herself, she just says, and I leave for an afternoon or evening. I can write hubs anywhere. She's working, and I'm retired, so I get more than my share of being on my own in the apartment.

I was a bachelor for 52 years and soon will have been married 18 years, and I've liked the married years better.

Not all of your 11 reasons would be applicable in the case of a single parent.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on December 07, 2012:

gmwilliams--What wise comments! I think you are right on target about societal expectations as well as people's attitudes toward marriage and divorce.. Thanks for reading and leaving such insightful comments.

Grace Marguerite Williams from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on December 06, 2012:

Great hub, marriage is not for everyone despite subliminal societal messages that "everyone should get married" and "something is somewhat 'wrong' with a person if he/she chooses to remain single". There are some people who want to be single. They love their independence, do not have to answer to anyone but themselves, and/or totally explore whom they really want to be.

So many people get married because of the societal impetus that "mature, stable" people are to be married. Even though they would be happier being single, they are somewhat pressured to be in a marital relationship. Women, especially, even in this postmodern age, are told that they are totally insignificant with a man.

So many people are in love with the IDEA of marriage that they rush into marriage, much to their utter regret later on. Marriage is something not to enter into lightly, it revolves much compromise and responsibilities that many people are not willing to assume. That is why the divorce rate is so high. If people were more serious and thoughtful regarding marriage, there would be less divorces.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on December 03, 2012:

Sunshine--Thanks for the compliment. I'm not dissing marriage, either. Whatever works, huh? Who knows? Maybe one day my guy and I will tie the know. We'd have to have a really huge house though, with plenty of space for my cats! :-)

Linda Bilyeu from Orlando, FL on December 03, 2012:

Excellent points Vicki, I truly like how your mind works. To each his own. I like being married, on most days! ;)

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on November 28, 2012:

tattuwurn--Good points about the kids. I've enjoyed my nieces and nephews all these years without having to raise them!!

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on November 27, 2012:

Vincent, thanks for your thoughtful comments. 19 years is a long time; it's sad that it ended so badly. I'm aware of some of the horrible times you've survived and still struggle through. Maybe you'll find that soulmate to share some things with--just not the same house! :-) I'm fortunate in that I have the best of both worlds. Thanks for stopping by, and thanks for the votes and share. Take care, my friend.

Vincent Moore on November 27, 2012:

What a wonderful, delightful hub on reasons to stay single. I must confess I stayed single till I was 27. Thought I met the love of my life and got married for the first time, divorced after 4 years no children. Met my second and stayed married for 19 years producing 4 children. If I had known at the time I met her that I married a fatal attraction and a parnoid jealous nut case, I certainly would never have married a second time. It was a costly divorce financially, physically and mentally. I am still feeling the wrath of this divorce 14 yrs after the divorce. I am single entering my senior years and will remain so until my dying breath, however I would definitely consider the type of relationship you have. Your place or mine, but don't overstay your welcome. LOL Yes indeed I love all the reasons for staying single and I apply most of them:-0). Now to find a soulmate that I can love from a distance is the trick? Any takers? lol Voted Up, awesome and brilliant and shared.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on November 27, 2012:

Minnetonka Twin--I'm so glad you enjoyed the hub! The single life is a great one for people like us! Slumber parties every night sound fun. Sounds like you have a good thing going! Thanks for stopping by!

Linda Rogers from Minnesota on November 27, 2012:

Victoria Lynn-The title had me and I enjoyed every piece of it. I think it's great that you share your experience of not tying the not but being whole and happy-Societal rules and traditions can make it hard to be different. I have never married and it was by choice. I enjoy male companionship but just love my independence and never met anyone that makes me yearn for anything different. I have it made now that I've been living with my twin sister and raising her two kids after her divorce. We have slumber parties every night. LOL

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on November 14, 2012:

Nyamache. I've never felt lonely. I have pets, and I see my boyfriend on the weekends and occasionally see family and friends. Still, others want people around more. Yeah, I agree; it depends on the person. Thanks for commenting!

Joshua Nyamache from Kenya on November 14, 2012:

This is really interesting. Another reason why people decide to remain single is to avoid the kind of abuse their married friends undergo. Although being single has got its advantages also being married has its own advantages. I am not sure if those who make decisions of being single do not feel lonely since human beings are social creatures who have got feelings. It is upon a person to decide to be single or to get married.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on November 13, 2012:

LOL, Wesman! That's all I can say. Your comment is priceless. :-)

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on November 13, 2012:

Crystal--I've glad you love the hub. I need to read your rant--sounds great! Thanks for the votes, too.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on November 13, 2012:

Angelo--Great input about what happens with "expectations." Thanks for sharing your thoughts--and my hub!

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on November 13, 2012:

Thanks, T! Gotta be light sometimes (although my reasons are totally serious!). Glad you liked it! That's a great compliment coming from you!

Wesman Todd Shaw from Kaufman, Texas on November 13, 2012:

Do you smoke? Do you drink too much? Do you leave the toilet lid up and the toothpaste cap off?




4. NEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You had me at "tie the noose" :)

Crystal Tatum from Georgia on November 13, 2012:

I love this hub. I agree that staying single is preferable to entering into marriage without proper forethought and willingness to make the necessary commitments and compromises. I've written my own hub "A Single Woman's Rant" about society's prejudices regarding single women over a certain age. These are particularly alive and well in the good ole South, where I live. Voted up and awesome.

Angelo52 on November 13, 2012:

I live with my partner. She and I have been together over 13 years and are not officially married. I was married officially twice. Both ended in divorce at about 7 years, the last one badly. Seems to me that being "married" creates expectations, which when not fulfilled lead to divorce.

Great article. Accolades and sharing.

Terrye Toombs from Somewhere between Heaven and Hell without a road map. on November 13, 2012:

This was excellent, V! My favorite was #2. :) I love seeing your lighter side! :) Shared a little here and there. ;)

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on November 11, 2012:

Hi, Aaron! Great comments! Thanks! I guess I'm more of a loner. I don't like having anyone around all the time, and I don't like to talk much. So, having a significant other who just lives a mile and a half away works perfectly for me! I can see some benefits of marriage, but I see being single but having someone, too, as being the best of both worlds. Actually, marriage might be okay, as long as we live in our own houses. LOL! Thanks for the input! :-)

Aaron Perks from United Kingdom on November 11, 2012:

I'm seeing a lot of views from people here that have been married, or are married. I can't imagine being married a bad thing. I have been with my partner for nearly three years and wouldn't dream of getting married yet. We've both said settling down is an old mans game. I'd prefer to do what I want, or at least compromise. I know if I was single, i wouldn't have to compromise, but being made to do something I wouldn't do opens your eyes to new concepts & ideas, going out of your comfort zone. One of the main reasons I like being with someone, someone to talk to all hours of the day, best friend and partner in one.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on November 10, 2012:

DrMark--For sure! Write a hub about the benefits of having your own geese--even if they do leave droppings in the bathroom. LOL. I can relate (somewhat) as I keep a cat in the bathroom occasionally that I am bringing into the family to get used to the other cats. Yeah, I know, not quite the same thing! :-)

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on November 10, 2012:

dingerd--Sounds like you have a good arrangement! That's wonderful. I say go with whatever works! :-)

Dr Mark from The Atlantic Rain Forest, Brazil on November 09, 2012:

I call them my ecologically sound (or extremely frugal, take your pick) lawnmowers. They mow the lawn, leave great compost material, and eventually will lay eggs. Sounds like a great hub, right?

Of course they have to grow up, and while still small they´re sleeping in my bathroom, leaving little packages all over the tile.

It is a good thing I am single!!

Darrel Dinger from Tennessee on November 09, 2012:

Marriage can be very good for some people and very bad for others. I personally love being married to my wife. I get my space when I want it and I basically get to do whatever I want. I know not every marriage is like mine but I'd have to say that marriage is good for me.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on November 09, 2012:

DrMark--A "bit" weird? I would say your geese issue is much more than a little weird. LOL. I agree with you on what a spouse would think about the droppings. And I'm assuming this is a true situation of yours? Love it! LOL. :-)

Dr Mark from The Atlantic Rain Forest, Brazil on November 09, 2012:

This was so great! I have another one to add (a bit weird, I will admit)

-You can let your baby geese sleep in the shower stall every night.

(Try finding a spouse that would allow goose droppings all over the bathroom floor every morning. She would immediately cite the number one reason for divorce, and the geese would be number two.)

Voted up and sharing. Thanks!!!

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on November 07, 2012:

Beth100--Great comments! Yes, I'm happy in my relationship, having found something that works very well. :-)

Beth100 from Canada on November 06, 2012:

You've hit it on the nail -- marriage on a piece of paper holds very little meaning. Marriage is a commitment of the heart - whether living together or sharing your lives together. The only institutions gaining from paper marriages is the government -- can they think of more things to tax?!?

You sound happy -- as you should be as you've found what works for you. Congratulations!! If more people could be truthful to themselves, there would be more happy relationships in this world!!

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on October 30, 2012:

hawkeye49er--I can see how that would be true. I guess I like my alone time too much! I do have a great guy, though! thanks for reading and commenting! :-)

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on October 30, 2012:

lovedoctor--With a name like yours, you would know! Thanks for reading and commenting!

hawkeye49er on October 30, 2012:

Yes, its nice to be single but it's a lot better to be married to someone who cares about and thatwill Love you. Unconditionally no matter. the outcome.

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on October 30, 2012:

ElSeductor--Thanks for the great comments. I hope your sibling's marriage lasts! I'll have to check out your hubs. Thanks for the votes!

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on October 30, 2012:

catgypsy--A billionaire in separate houses would be great!! Yes, it's hard to adapt one's life to another's, especially when used to living alone for so long. Being a catgypsy, you HAVE to be a cat lady! :-)

lovedoctor926 on October 30, 2012:

With the high rate of infidelity and divorce these days, I think these are all very good reasons to stay single. Great hub!

Victoria Lynn (author) from Arkansas, USA on October 30, 2012:

teaches--I'm glad you're happily married--and hopefully you get that alone time now and then. Thanks for reading!

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