1: Talk EVERY DAY
Your relationship will fall in your list of priorities if you are lax about keeping contact. If your relationship is important, put it first and make time every day to talk. My husband and I were both working and had a 6 hour time difference, so sometimes we would have to set an alarm clock for 1am or 6am in order to make time. It is worth it to hear your loved one's voice.
2: Make A Reading List
Make a Reading List: Whether you have to read a chapter on your commute or listen to the book on tape while you're doing the dusting, having your own private book club means you're doing the same thing even though you are apart. A long distance relationship can often drive people apart because they are living different lives. If you're both geeking out over Game of Thrones, there is less risk of losing the things you have in common.
3: Have A Movie Night
You may not be able to watch it together, but you can keep skype chat open while you watch your movie and write comments to each other, or watch it apart and then talk about what you thought. You might even be glad your honey isn't there to see you blub your eyes out at The Notebook.
4: Capture Your Lives On Camera
If you don't have a great deal of time to spend talking to each other, take photos of the things you are doing apart and send them to each other. When my husband went rafting for a weekend with his friends, he sent me several photos every day of his shenanigans. I, on the other hand, made his mouth water by sending him pictures of all the tasty meals and desserts I was making.
Mini Golf: Wish You Were Here!
5: Create A Competitive Element
Sometimes just talking, talking, talking can get a bit stale. When you are together you can do all sorts of fun things but being apart means most interactions begin and end with talking. We had a running words with friends competition the entire time we were apart, so when we weren't feeling particularly chatty, we'd battle it out on the scrabble board.
6: Get Creative
My husband and I invented what I like to call the draw-off. One of us would come up with a word, such as 'clock', and we'd both have 5 minutes to draw something inventive which related to that word. It was a fun thing to do together, and we came up with some crazy things.
A Draw-Off Winner: The Clocktopus
7: Plan A Trip Together
One of the most important aspects of a long term relationship is breaking it down and making sure there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Even if you're not in a situation where you can be together permanently just yet, planning a trip together can give you something to look forward to. My husband was in America and I was in Germany, so we were a long way apart and couldn't afford regular visits. My trip to Pittsburgh was something we planned constantly, from places we would go to restaurants we would eat at. It was a fun way to feel like we would be together soon.
8: Schedule Some Romantic Time
Sweet talking a computer screen may not sound like your ideal romantic evening, but it's important to keep the romance alive a little. It's a touch embarrassing for some, but it's an option worth exploring because it will bring you closer together and may even broaden your sexual horizons. Whether you opt to have a little fun with the webcam, send each other naughty emails or snap a few raunchy shots on your phone, don't neglect your love life even if you can't share the same bed.
9: Keep Each Other Guessing
I always knew that my husband was thinking about me like crazy because every morning when I woke up, there would be a surprise waiting for me in my inbox. You can find ways to be spontaneous and make each other smile even when you're not around each other. Whether it's a simple note to say I Love You or a link to a picture or article you think your loved one might like, make getting up without you a little easier on them by giving them a present each morning. My husband loved to send me encrypted notes. I still don't know what some of them mean!
Any Guesses? One Of The Encrypted Notes
10: Go Shopping
When we lived together in Prague, my husband and I loved to visit markets and browse through shops looking at clothes, trinkets and other interesting things. Living apart meant we couldn't go out and do those things, so instead we'd browse websites together looking for things we thought the other would like (or get a good laugh out of). We were too poor to buy each other real presents, but linking my husband to a really gorgeous le creuset casserole dish (we are both cooking freaks) or a delicious recipe I wanted to make for him (yeah, we are both cooking freaks) was almost as good.
Can you think of any other fun things to do together when you are in a long distance relationship?
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
Questions & Answers
Question: How do I convince my significant other in a long distance relationship to make me happy?
Answer: I'm not an expert on the subject, but I don't think it's possible to "convince" someone to make you happy. If they are not willing to take your happiness into consideration, it might be time to reconsider your relationship. Try to have open, honest communication with him and work out a solution that will make both of you happy. If you still feel unhappy, again, it might be time to reconsider your relationship.
I also strongly advise you to talk to friends and family about the subject, and possibly a therapist, if that is a possibility for you. You should always take care of your personal well-being, and sharing your concerns with others is important.
John on March 27, 2018:
My girlfriend and I are in a long distance relationship and without the means to meet face-to-face for a few years. I love her because she looked for the good in me when I was fracturing mentally. She and I have been dating for around 6 months and I plan to move to be with her when I can. Any advice or suggestions for us? (No, she and I aren't 18. No, she and I aren't sex crazy 'most of our generation is' and finally we are the same age, I'm 15) I would love to hear advice on things she and I could do together since we can't necessarily kiss eachother much less hold hands while being in a park or anywhere yet (outside people when weather is right, inside when not)
MikeP on February 19, 2014:
Watching a movie together is great but can be frustrating when the video is off and you laugh at different times. I found this website that syncs the video for you, so you can actually laugh at the same parts and feel closer.
Check out dobby.co if you're interested; it's completely free :)
Jenna Long on October 24, 2013:
This is cool! I like the concept of keeping on doing the things that you both used to do when you were still together. Not only that you will not stop doing what you both love doing, but, this is also one way for you to somehow momentarily forget the distance between you two. Regular communication, creative activities, romantic dates via Skype, etc. Before you knew it, you are fetching him again at the airport. Long distance relationships are tough so why not do something to make things lighter and happier instead of whining and making things more complicated than the way it is?
Jojo on August 29, 2013:
The first encrypted note, the one on top, reads:
You bring happiness to me.
Emily Nemchick (author) from Phoenix, AZ on August 23, 2013:
That's a very unique approach. I'm just sharing things which worked out for me, thanks for leaving some extra suggestions!
neyzen on July 31, 2013:
leave marks the other will see,
on the net, on her radio broadcast
if you are crazy enough: in the news
get your friendly neighborhood (graffiti) bomber a fucking gift card and a reason
i dids them all, even when i didn't feel like it.
DO NOT TALK EVERY DAY, there is not enough material to talk about every day, you will only grow more distant. a pager system works betterl.. one beep, i love you, 2- skype now, 3- call now, 5- it is time to open the package.. and so on
Ayu from Sorajima on July 20, 2013:
Haven't been in an LDR but I think the reading and movie list might really work! Nice hub \m/
Abdus Salam from Bangladesh on June 15, 2013:
Very interesting. Thanks for sharing..
Gabriela Hdez from Valencia, Spain on June 15, 2013:
This was a great hub. Congratulations on the HOTD!
Another idea, related to what you already mentioned is sharing a project that needs constant interaction and a strategy, like writing a book, or putting an online photo album together, or creating a family webpage . Even playing internet games as long as it is something interesting for both of you.
rose-the planner from Toronto, Ontario-Canada on June 15, 2013:
Excellent tips on long distance relationships. Certainly it must be difficult to be away for long periods of time from your spouse or significant other, but you have provided some worthwhile solutions. Thank you for sharing and congratulations on HOTD. (Voted Up) -Rose
Kathryn from Windsor, Connecticut on June 15, 2013:
No wonder this won HOTD, these were excellent ideas! I have been in in a couple of long term relationships in my life, although not quite that far away. It is not fun. It must be especially hard when it's a married relationship.
I'm glad you found so many ways to keep it interesting, and to stay in touch, and thank you for sharing this with us! Congrats on winning HOTD.
Linda Bilyeu from Orlando, FL on June 15, 2013:
My daughter and her now husband were in a long distance relationship for 4 years during college. That's if a 2 hour drive is considered long distance! They thought so. Great ideas! They used a few.
Kawika Chann from Northwest, Hawaii, Anykine place on June 15, 2013:
Nicely done emily, I couldn't imagine being away from my wife for more than a few days. When we first met, it was so hard to stay apart from each other - and we were just 15 miles away... love always, always finds a way. Congrats on HOTD, upvoted/useful/following. Peace. Kawi.
lovedoctor926 on June 15, 2013:
Congratulations on HOTD. These are very creative ideas. I'm glad that it worked for you. There are challenges involved when it comes to having a long distance relationship, but it can be overcome if both parties are willing to make it work. People often say that LDR relationships don't work because you need to have that level of physical closeness, but I like to prove them wrong and your story just goes to show that anything is possible if you believe.
Marites Mabugat-Simbajon from Toronto, Ontario on June 15, 2013:
I really enjoyed this read, Emily! I could imagine the things you have described here. Long distance love can't be divided with a borderline, just as the situation calls the same way at home. Love it!
MaeMG on June 15, 2013:
Amazing article! I've been in a long distance relationship before that spanned for four years while I was in college. One of the hardest parts was keeping our relationship alive when life got in the way. I wish I had this list around then. You touched upon some amazing advice and tips to keep flame burning even while you're apart.
Natasha from Hawaii on June 15, 2013:
My man is in the Navy and I've been in school/will have to return to school for one final semester in the fall. You are so right - finding something to look forward to helps so much! When he's on deployment, like he is now, we can't physically talk or send pictures, but I still email him every day. I think my one additional tip would be sending actual paper letters/post cards and not warning the other they're coming. He is awesome about sending me mail and even put something in the mailbox the morning of his deployment so I got it days after he left. Great hub and congrats on HotD!
Phyllis Doyle Burns from High desert of Nevada. on June 15, 2013:
Congratulations for achieving the Hub Of The Day award. Well done!
Phyllis Doyle Burns from High desert of Nevada. on June 15, 2013:
Emily, you have some great tips to ease the pain of being apart from a loved one. I have a few friends in a long distance relationship and this hub is sure to give them some ideas. Thanks for sharing your insight and clever ideas for this type of relationship.
Emily Nemchick (author) from Phoenix, AZ on June 15, 2013:
Thanks for the comments. Thelma, you are right. Trust is the most important thing. Moncrieff, I agree! My husband and I did a lot of evaluating in our time apart. Eurozolu, I'm sorry it didn't work out for you - it is not for everyone and I am glad to be reunited with my husband now. Anita, thanks! I agree that it is one of the most painful experiences ever. This is just my way of helping others through it because I know how hard it can be.
It's amazing to know so many people are reading and enjoying this hub. It means a lot to me, so thanks!
Anita Saran from Bangalore, India on June 15, 2013:
Lovely hub. And it's especially so because you add a personal touch to it. But I would say that a long distance relationship can be one of the most painful things you can experience! Voted up.
bradley brown from Harrow Middlesex on June 15, 2013:
Great hub emilynemchick, really enjoyable read but had long distance relationship but it was just too much for me .
moncrieff from New York, NY on June 15, 2013:
That's a great list of communication options for people separated by time zones, mountains and far seas. I and my wife have been separated on several occasions by months and sometimes years, living apart on different continents. I wish we had thought about some of the things you suggested, quite spot on.
I wanted to add that a long-distance relationship offers more room for introspection and reevaluating your life together, which is good, I think. And of course, the backbone of the quest to communicate no matter what should be a deep feeling for each other. Voted up.
Thelma Alberts from Germany and Philippines on June 15, 2013:
Congrats on the HOTD award! Great hub. My hubby and I do some of the things you mentioned above when my hubby went home to Germany earlier than me. That is a few months in a year. Talking, talking and chatting online what happens everyday in our lives is a must. Posting photos every now and then is good. Of course there´s trust to each other. Without trust, life is not good when you have a long distance relationship.
I´m sure that this hub is very useful to others. Voted up and more. Thanks for sharing. Have a lovely weekend!
Emily Nemchick (author) from Phoenix, AZ on May 03, 2013:
Thanks! It's tough to be apart, so I am glad you and your husband have found some ways to make it work.
Debbie Pinkston from Pereira, Colombia and NW Arkansas on May 03, 2013:
What a great Hub! My husband and I are apart sometimes for 2-3 months per year, and we have implemented several of the things you suggested. We play Words with Friends, and we talk every day! We also read the same books sometimes, and talk about them as we progress through the book.
Thanks for this helpful Hub that no doubt will be useful to many people now as long distance relationships are more and more common.