What Happened To The Woman I Married? My Wife Has Turned Into A Depressing Monster!(Emunah La-Paz Defines You)

Updated on December 29, 2016

What Happened To My Wife? She's Making Me Miserable

Unhappy male and female finger puppets by: Ian L
Unhappy male and female finger puppets by: Ian L | Source


Until death do us part, these five words seem simple from the start however, relationships change. Most men notice that as time moves on, their wives seem sad and uncontent.

This article is about how men can support their wives through difficult seasons of change.

The Way Things Were

Jeff Klisares couple having adrink on the beach.
Jeff Klisares couple having adrink on the beach. | Source

The Way Things Are.

My wife and I were inseparable. We did everything together. Our relationship was magical. We had the kind of connection that romance novels are made of. My wife told me often how she could live off love. Ten years later, we have five children and our relationship is wilting away.

My wife and I can’t afford to go on romantic dinner dates like we used to. We have a house full of kids now. Pizza and hamburger helper has replaced fine dining. My wife is a stay- at- home mother.

Before we married we both agreed that she would quit her job to properly raise our kids. My wife couldn’t wait to have kids, but now all she does is complain about how unruly they are. We have all boys. I figure that young boys are supposed to be rambunctious.

My wife complains that I never take her out anymore, but we can’t find a babysitter. And to be honest, I’m tired when I get home from work, the last thing I want to do is sit in a stuffy restaurant.

My wife complains that she needs new clothes and undergarments. I gave her the Sears card to go pick up some items for herself. This woman went off on me! Her behavior was monster like, and scary! She told me that she did not want to buy her underwear at a place that sales appliances and tires.

But what hurt my feelings the most, is that she told our next door neighbor that she was having a hard time removing the stains out my underwear! That is my personal business! She shouldn’t reveal such matters with our neighbor! At any rate, the neighbor gave my wife some kind of home remedy to use on my underwear.

What made me deeply concerned about my wife’s behavior is when I accidentally spilled cranberry juice on the carpet. The way she went off on me was uncalled for! That woman acted as if I had spilled Hydrochloric acid! She told me that she is unable to remove stain from the carpet.

What happened to the woman I married? Who is this stranger? One minute she’s laughing hysterically, the next minute she’s crying and sulking. My wife is depressing. I think she’s cracking up! This woman is making me miserable, what should I do?


What Is The Problem?

Black and white photo of woman hiding behind her hair.
Black and white photo of woman hiding behind her hair. | Source

The Response:

Aaron, I am sorry that you are dealing with this uncomfortable cycle in your marriage.

First I would like to address the stain in your carpet, not- your underwear.

You may want to try using non-bleaching detergent, this may work, and if this detergent does not remove the stain, you may try using the remedy that your neighbor gave to your wife as an alternative.


Your wife could be dealing with depression. Raising five kids and eating Hamburger Helper for a long period of time, could make most women snap.

Statistics show that One-fourth of all women deal with bouts of depression at some point in their lives. Sometimes the depression is hidden and comes out in other ways.

According to doctors who specialize in women's depression, women will often go to their doctor complaining of headaches, or backaches, when in reality the problem may be related to the inability to enjoy life which causes depression.

Now granted everyone feels down on occasion and usually there is an understanding root cause. Romantic issues, the death of a loved one, and problems on the job can become a deep problem. These concerns usually dwindle away with time.

Chronic depression is a problem, because it can affect the woman's routine life.

Seven million women in The United Sates alone are diagnosed with depression. Many stay at home mothers tend to dwell on their feelings. Thinking on negative feelings cause mood swings. Mothers need to find a support group that will help them cope. A supportive church that reaches out to women is often helpful.

Date Night:

There are some things that you can do to help your wife Aaron, such as finding a way once a week to take her out on a date. Even if it's after the kids are asleep.

You need to keep the relationship going in your marriage. It is true that you are not responsible for you wife's happiness however- you can do your part.

Encourage your wife to go out for an early dinner with her girlfriends.

When your wife observes that you are making an effort to calm her nerves, she will realize that you are trying to be supportive.


Date Night In The House!

A black and white image of a man handing his wife flowers.
A black and white image of a man handing his wife flowers. | Source

The Depression Poll.

Do Women Suffer From Depression More Often Than Men?

See results

Story of us trailer


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • profile image

      13 months ago

      Sounds like she needs her husband to consistently commit to help with household duties, and up his game on leading by example and teaching the children to be helpful and respectful to their mother. Not dismissing their behavior with excuses. But helping set expectations for them. Chores, self care, basic rules, responsibilities.

      And, does the woman not have access to her own spending money set aside within the budget?

      Trade babysitting with another family monthly. (After the children learn to behave well enough for someone to be willing to watch them)

      Eat dinner at home. Or have a picnic at a park. Many cheap options available.

    • swilliams profile image

      Emunah La Paz 2 years ago from Arizona

      Hi Glenn! I agree! When it comes to keeping a marriage together is a tough job. Couples change through the process of time, in which it can be hard to grow together as a couple. I hope that this article will be helpful to your friend. Thank you for sharing! You are a good friend!

    • Glenn Stok profile image

      Glenn Stok 2 years ago from Long Island, NY

      I have a friend who is having trouble with his marriage. I attended his wedding in 2008 and I thought the two of them were meant for each other. But he doesn't understand why things are not the same. Your hub may help him with his marriage. It's not easy to find someone special and it would be a shame to have to start all over.