Housewives Without Children: Celebrating Life as a SAHW
How I Became a Housewife
When I got married my husband was offered a job in a new city. The idea came up that if we lived very close to his workplace, I could stay home and be a homemaker.
His commute was to be at least an hour each way. Mine would also be at least 30 minutes each way. Our work shifts also would differ. He works 3 p.m. to 11:30 p.m., and more than likely I would have found a 9-to-5 job. So if we lived this way, not only would he be on the road two hours a day, but we would barely see each other.
Being an Independent Career Woman is Over-rated
I can also say, after working in the corporate world for many years, the only thing I didn't miss anything about it.
The politics of the workplace—he said/she said, the blame-game, nightmare personalities, fighting for salary increases, etc.—was not for me.
If anyone had told me when I was in college that this is what it all came down to, and that this lifestyle was supposed to take 35 to 40 years of my life away, I never would have volunteered for it.
I'm not competitive in general. In addition, I didn't want to spend my day around people who were absorbed in that lifestyle. So after a decade years of it, I left my desk job that already left me unfulfilled anyway.
Choosing the Life of a Housewife
So we moved to an area where my husband could be at work in ten minutes, and I became a housewife. It was the best decision. And it isn't just an ideal life for women who have children. Here is why I love being a stay-at-home-wife:
I have made our home into a little oasis away from the rest of the world. Since I don't have to deal with most of the stresses of the outside world, I can concentrate on making our home comfortable, cozy, and most importantly, a welcoming place for my husband to come back to at night. He deals with the big, bad world, so massages, candles, and lots of love are always in store for him.
I love cooking and baking and making meals with effort and care. In fact, I make almost everything from scratch. At home, I make dishes full of nutritious vegetables and delicious meats. I also bake sweets and breads freshly each week. When you cook from scratch at home you realize that food prepared at restaurants isn't any better. You won't miss eating out.
I pride myself on perfecting a traditional, old-fashioned lifestyle that women lived for most of civilized history. Homemaking is indeed an art form and I like that as a SAHW I am in the minority of people who absorb themselves in this. I sew, decorate our home with homemade crafts like wreaths, and tend to a garden that feeds us vegetables plentifully.
Being taken care of. Finally, I enjoy the fact that I have a man that takes care of me financially and is happy to do so. I feel being a housewife allows me to be feminine in the most traditional form. I feel the working world is very masculine, and I am happy to have left it behind. I will take the "1950s lifestyle" over a career any day.
It made financial sense. Often, the public is led to believe that you need two incomes to stay afloat. This isn't always so. First, you can have an IRA as a housewife. You do not have to work outside of the home for retirement security. Get rid of the second car, the gas for the long commutes, the money you spend on take-out and restaurants, and the extra wardrobe costs. When you do the math, sometimes you will realize you are profiting MUCH less than you previously thought. The few extra thousand dollars for contributing to the work force simply aren't worth the trouble.
What is your favorite part of being a housewife?
Homemaking Is a Beautiful Thing but it Isn't for Everyone
A lot of people, especially working women, do not understand the allure of being a housewife, and many of them do not respect those who choose to have this lifestyle. Even though their mothers and grandmothers and most women in history were indeed housewives. But the truth is you don't need to worry about this.
When you choose to be a SAHW, and especially a housewife without children, be prepared for some of your working friends to scoff at the idea or even stop talking to you. Sometimes their feelings are born out of jealousy and sometimes they simply feel they are superior to an old-fashioned domestic life. In the end, it's none of their business what arrangement you and your husband have. Different strokes for different folks.
Many feminists also believe that women all should work outside the home and that even mothers shouldn't be stay-at-home moms. Perhaps they believe that getting take-out most days of the week, having both spouses stressed out and overworked, and hiring babysitters for your children equals a "normal" life.
If only they understood the art of homemaking and the happy, mellow mood it brings to all our lives.
As a housewife I feel blessed to be doing what I love each day, and I hope all of you do as well!