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For Men: Choose a Wife Wisely and Carefully

Updated on February 14, 2017

By Dexter Yarbrough

Marriage is a wonderful institution. There is nothing like having the perfect mate to travel along the journey of life. What makes it special is when you have chosen someone that not necessarily shares all the interests you have, but at least respects them. And you respect hers as well.

Sure, marriage has its challenges. The key is choosing the right mate from the very beginning. By the end of this writing, I hope to have shared a bit of wisdom on how to choose a mate wisely and carefully.

Men, understand that women are different. They think differently than we do! They love unlike men. They hurt unlike men. Some can be more forgiving; some less forgiving. That is why it is essential that you get to know how she thinks, how she reacts to situations, her values, her upbringing, why she does what she does, etc. (it is even more essential that you know who you are as a man!).

Unfortunately, as men, we tend to focus on those visual things that stimulate us and choose based solely on these things (see picture above). Physical beauty, wonderful words, affection and sexual prowess are things that some men signal in on initially. Sometimes, these things become the predominate reasons to begin and continue a relationship. While they are important, they should not be the highest priorities in engaging in a long term relationship that could lead to marriage.

I have talked to men that have been in relationships for over five years and many of them are downright miserable. Some are scared of their mates. Some dread going home to nagging. Many engage in extra-marital relationships because communication and physical activity has diminished. Women may disagree, but many men cheat because they have tried and tried but the spouse does not reciprocate (this is not a justification, it is an explanation). Women should not be hurt in relationships and men should not be miserable in them, either.

Enumerated below are some tips that should be helpful in finding the right mate for a lifelong, marital relationship - based on mutual respect, love and trust.

1. Do you share similar interests and beliefs?

The woman you marry should have many of the same beliefs and interests as you. This doesn't mean that she can't have her own. It means that there should be interests and beliefs you have in common. It’s fine to have differing opinions. But it’s important that you agree on the big things – money, family, children, sex, etc. Have these discussions with the woman you’re considering choosing for a wife before you marry her, to make sure you’ll get along.

2. Does she have a good upbringing?

She should be brought up in a loving home or at least have strong values and a good understanding of family life. She should respect others and love her parents. She should have good manners. If the woman you are considering marrying is rude, uses a lot of profanity, looks down on others, is excessively moody, argumentative over minor things and/or is generally ill-tempered, DO NOT MARRY HER! This type of person will turn on you and make your life miserable. It is best she be left to her other unmarried female friends. Leave them to whine and commiserate over why no man wants to be with them in marriage. Maybe she will finally figure it out.

3. Is she successful?

A good wife will have achievements and successes that made her successful long before you came around. When you choose a wife, choose someone who has goals and aspirations in life that go beyond wanting to get married. Marry someone that is well educated. By this, I do not mean someone who has numerous degrees. I am talking about someone that is versatile and can have a discussion on various topics. I know women who have high school diplomas but can have more interesting conversations than those that have doctoral degrees.

4. Is she attractive to you?

Again, I am not just talking about looks here. Does this woman attract you? Are you drawn to her? Is her quirky humor something you love and do her dimples make your heart melt? She doesn't have to be a bombshell, but there's got to be something about a woman, more than externally, that makes you want to choose her as a wife.

5. Does she have a sense of humor?

Life is not only about work, kids, career, etc. Life and marriage should also include loads of laughter, fun and humor. DO NOT MARRY a woman who is always angry and/or depressed and doesn't laugh at the silliest things. Laughter and fun should come easy and not be forced. You should be able to laugh AT each other when appropriate and WITH each other.

6. How is she with material things? Money?

If the woman you are considering marrying is materialistic and seems consumed with having money - especially yours, DO NOT MARRY HER. This is very easy to determine. If she spends money freely but questions when you take $20.00 out of the ATM, you have a problem on your hands. If she consistently has to have nice things but fails to even provide you with a gift during special times, you need to run away as fast as you can! This person is stuck on herself and will drain you dry financially and emotionally in a marriage. This doesn't mean that you should be cheap. It means that you should carefully watch and analyze her in different situations. Find out if she has any bankruptcies, judgements or a bad credit history. Trust me, she is trying to find this out about you. Don't be stuck on stupid, men!

7. How was she in a previous relationship?

Your emotional, physical and financial security depends on you knowing how she acted in previous relationships, if any. Find out as subtlety as possible. You can't interrogate her or her friends and family like the FBI! However, you can ask questions in a non-prodding, non-intrusive way. Use humor to illicit answers. If you are listening carefully, watching closely for non-verbal signs, etc., the truth will be revealed. Let her know that you are not the man she was with previously. When necessary, let this be known clearly and unequivocally. Be very clear, if necessary, that you will not be disrespected nor mistreated, in any way. Let's be fair, she expects the same from you.

8. Has she ever cheated?

When people are "openly dating," there is an understanding that no commitment is in place. It is understood and agreed by both parties that they will "see" other people. When a commitment is in place, both parties understand and agree that a monogamous relationship is in order.

For example, if a teacher gives an exam and clearly states that you cannot use any material to assist, an understanding is in place. If you decide to use methods that go against this understanding, you are cheating (whether you are caught or not). If the teacher states that an exam is "open book" and any materials can be used to assist, there is a clear understanding. If you decide to use your book, this is not cheating.

Men, don't be fooled. Women cheat on their boyfriends and husbands. This is a fact. Don't listen to those that try to excuse or justify the behavior of women that act inappropriately. If it is wrong for men to cheat, it is wrong for women. Period. You need to inquire of your potential wife as to whether or not she has engaged in this type of behavior. An affirmative answer alone should not deter you from marrying her. You need to find out the reasons why and determine if she justifies this behavior or if she is generally remorseful for the deceit. Do not believe the adage that "once a cheat always a cheat." We all make mistakes and its quite possible that you have cheated in a past relationship as well. But you have to be very careful and watchful. If your gut is telling you that your potential wife is cheating, DO NOT MARRY HER. For emotional, physical and health reasons, you have a right to know if she is exposing you to possible physical DRAMA with another man as well as serious sexually transmitted diseases. Ask pointed questions and be observant. Do not allow your potential spouse to get away with cheating just because she is a "female," "emotional," "misunderstood," or "its all your fault because you don't___________ "(fill in the blank). She does not want a potential husband that will put her life at risk. You deserve the same respect!

9. Does she love you? Really?

Actions speak louder than words. Some of the best liars are outstanding communicators. That's what make them great at deceiving others. It is not what she says, it's how she says it and what she does. If your car stops on a less travelled road, will she get out of bed to come and get you without debate? Does she comfort you when you are sick? Does she side with you when you are right, even at the expense of losing a good friend, who is obviously wrong? Is she supportive of your career aspirations? Does she accept you for the wonderful person you are or is she attempting to change you? Don't just listen to her say she loves you. Observe how she loves you.

10. Do you have that feeling?

More than any quiz, date or trial living arrangement will tell, you can usually know who to choose as a wife just by the feeling you get when you are around her. If you have spent enough time with the woman to truly know her, and if the thought of spending your life with her not only excites you, but makes you long for the day, then you've probably hit upon that precious feeling that will likely leave you on one knee. If you have any doubts, DO NOT MARRY HER. Men, we have intuition as well. START USING IT! Doubts about marrying someone don't pop up the night prior to the wedding. They are a culmination of the experiences you have had with this person since you met. Regardless of what talk show hosts or other relationship-less people have to say, you DO NOT have to marry a woman if you are unsure. DO NOT MARRY a demanding, threatening, nasty-acting woman. It is better to have a few weeks of displeasure at the loss of the relationship rather than a lifetime of pain and depression.

Men, it is important that you exemplify all of the things you want in a mate. Learn to communicate well. Be romantic. Clear up financial problems and be up front about them. Be able to converse on topics other than sports and politics. Be truthful (even if it hurts. DO NOT MARRY a woman that can't handle the truth). Respect and take part in that for which she has a passion. Be helpful. Be respectful; don't be rude. Watch your manners.

Be supportive and appreciative of all that she does for you. Do not be verbally or physically abusive (if it ever comes close to this, just walk away - forever). Do not engage her in useless arguments (be firm and resolute; she will get the message soon enough). Clearly communicate the expectations of commitment in the relationship and the ramifications if it is broken. Tell her you love her, often. Touch her affectionately and playfully. Surprise her with unexpected gifts. Do not be a slob. Dress appropriately and use the good grooming skills your mother taught you.

With marriages ending in divorce at alarming rates, it is important for men to choose wisely and carefully in the very beginning. There are many good women that would love to have a charming, wonderful man. Be the best man that you can be and you will attract the right woman, who will ultimately be a great wife.

Dexter Yarbrough © Copyright 2011

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    • QudsiaP1 profile image

      QudsiaP1 6 years ago

      Woah... I am really curious as to who inspired this hub. :P

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 6 years ago from United States

      After hearing countless women give advice to other women, I felt that men needed suggestions on how to choose a woman wisely in order to have a sustainable marriage. Men and women need to act responsibly in a relationship. Both need to choose a mate wisely.

    • Max_Power profile image

      Max_Power 6 years ago from Sunshine Coast, Queensland, Australia.

      Wow! Dexter this is really great advice, and I enjoy your style of writing. I would love to be married, and this hub gives me hope that I am on the right track by not settling for less than what I want in a partner. I whole-heartedly agree with you that as men we must first exemplify all of the things that we want in a mate. I will be back to read this from time to time when I am lacking faith in myself and my decisions:)

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 6 years ago from United States

      Max Power! Glad to hear from you. And I am happy that this advice may work for you! Thanks!

    • Ashantina profile image

      Ashantina 6 years ago

      I love this Dexter. And the importance that one [in this instance men] must lay the foundation within themselves.

      These tips are also applicable to women. Thanks for sharing your wisdom!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 6 years ago from United States

      Thank you so much Ashantina! I am a fan of your writing so it is an honor to get a thanks from you!

    • youmeget profile image

      youmeget 6 years ago

      Beautiful Hub well illustrated. How did you get those pictures? I love this Hub.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 6 years ago from United States

      Thanks, Youmeget! Glad you liked the hub. I got the pictures based on the emotions illustrated in the hub.

    • HartMurengu profile image

      HartMurengu 6 years ago from Nairobi

      Dexter ,I voted it up. Its a wonderful hub. Thanks for sharing

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 6 years ago from United States

      Thanks, HartMurengu! I appreciate your feedback. I have been following your hubs. Great!

    • LuisEGonzalez profile image

      Luis E Gonzalez 6 years ago from Miami, Florida

      Wish I would have read this hub years ago...I could have still be married.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 6 years ago from United States

      Luis, I wish I would have written it years ago!

    • SparklingBunny profile image

      SparklingBunny 6 years ago

      Wow! I like this. You know I think you are so right ... its always women telling women about how to choose the perfect man. Nobody really tells men how to choose the right woman. This is was so needed ! Thanks

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 6 years ago from United States

      Thanks, SparklingBunny! Welcome to Hubpages! I am so glad you saw a need for this!

    • HattieMattieMae profile image

      HattieMattieMae 6 years ago from Limburg, Netherlands

      Well I would agree with you on every part, but the parent part, because in my case I spent 15 years trying to undo what my parents taught me how to be in relationships. I would hope I spent that time and hard work doing something that is worthwhile in a relationship and my future husband didn't base in choice on my past history or my parents. Fortunately we didn't all have a choice who our parents were, or the unhealthy situations we wer e put in, but we learned to survive, and break those patterns and behaviors. So I would say depending on the situation, at least give a woman a chance if she has done all that hard work. Sometimes we make better marriage material because of what we've experienced, and can beat the odds more than others that come from healthy homes, because they never had to get through as many obstacles, or struggles.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 6 years ago from United States

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts, HattieMattieMae!

    • Sharon Douglas profile image

      Sharon Douglas 6 years ago from GA, United States

      Hello Dexter

      I truly support what you are conveying to the men. This is a topic that need to be touch and boy oh boy you nailed it!

      Excellent, excellent man!

      Dexter a wonderful and advisable hub in teen.

      Up, Awesome & Beautiful and good to go!

      Peace Bro.

    • HattieMattieMae profile image

      HattieMattieMae 6 years ago from Limburg, Netherlands

      Awesome!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 6 years ago from United States

      Thanks, Sharon and HattieMattieMae! I REALLY appreciate your comments and support!

    • caltex profile image

      caltex 5 years ago

      Dexter, if men were to go by this, I think the divorce rate just might go down. This article is definitely one for GQ. Excellent, as usual!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Caltex! Thanks for reading and your kind words! I agree wholeheartedly. Men, wise up!

    • profile image

      Becky 5 years ago

      Something that I believe you left out is the ability to work through an argument or disagreement. I have been married 26 years and if I did not insist that we work through a disagreement until we were both satisfied, our marriage would have been over long ago. Commitment to a marriage is crucial. "I do not do divorce, so get that thought out of your head" type thing.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Thanks Becky for sharing your thoughts!

    • dallasnicole profile image

      dallasnicole 5 years ago from Maryland

      Hi Dexter. This is truly a very helpful hub. I shared this on facebook & twitter. This is full of very valid information! Very well written and true

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Dallas! Wow, thank you! I really appreciate comments. I am glad it was helpful!

    • cherrycrime26 profile image

      January Moon 5 years ago from NY, Now Living in Atlanta Ga

      I really like this hub, I agree about 95%, Why? Because I grew up in a dysfunctional home, where there was a lot violence between my mom and step dad, it didn't stop me from having successful relationship relationship, it just Toke the right person to teach me what love was, and he didn't run off after seeing the destruction in my home which shocked him, my point is, even if her home life was not stable, its not an indication that the relationship will be toxic :) Voted up

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Cherrycrime26! I understand where you are coming from. I hate that you had that experience of violence growing up. I am glad that things have worked out in relationships for you. Thanks for the vote up and being one of my favorite supporters!

    • Jo_Goldsmith11 profile image

      Jo_Goldsmith11 5 years ago

      This is terrific! It is so refreshing to hear a man like yourself share great advice to both men and women! I wish I could of read this back when I started to date. It would of helped me not to pick the first two losers. I wish you and your wife all the happiness and blessings! :-)

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Thank you so much, Jo! I have been blessed in this area indeed!

    • DjBryle profile image

      DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =)

      Wow! I love this hub. It is really vital to know how to choose a good wife. Your idea of giving some advice for other men is novel. Thanks for sharing this very thoughtful hub. Voted up and rated it useful and awesome because it is. =)

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi DjBryle! Thanks for checking out my hub and the vote up. Sometimes men make bad choices when it comes to marriage. I hope to help them make the right choices. Thanks so much!

    • myi4u profile image

      myi4u 5 years ago from United Kingdom

      Funnily, my wife and me have different opinions all the time. Not that we are arguing all the time but we have kind of a lot of differences in interest. But gladly, we still try to accommodate each other in our daily life. Like now for example, she bakes her cakes and I am sitting in the kitchen with her, hubbing. So, all is well! Great hub!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Thanks, Myi4u! I am glad you enjoyed the hub!

    • profile image

      Justin 5 years ago

      Great hub. Have any advice for someone who didn't choose wisely, but wants to make it work?

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Yes. I would ask my wife/partner to seek counseling to discuss our issues. If there is a true willingness on both parts, it will work. Also, there has to honesty and communication. Discuss what bothers you about each other and work on ways not to do those things.

      Hang in there and things will work.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Thanks for you input!

    • profile image

      Lesleysherwood 5 years ago

      Hi Dexter. I am a woman and I love this hub. You obviously understand how we tick and you have freedom of speech in this subject having had a successful long marriage, which is quite rare these days. So many people 'upgrade' so to speak and then they find that the grass isn't necessarily greener on the 'better looking-younger model' side. Male or female. I feel that you have really made the point that we have to be complete in ourselves before considering marriage. If we're a moany naggy person before marriage, why would we think that a mate would make us any different. Stop moaning on our own first. Hope I'm making sense. I have re-shared this hub. Its brilliant.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Lesley. I wrote this after listening to a friend complain about his wife and newer marriage. I realized that he had not chosen wisely, so I wanted to write something for men (and women) that are considering marriage.

      I agree with you. It is not always greener on the other side. Marriage is great if we work at it.

      Thank you so much for your kind words and for sharing this!

    • profile image

      grhealiza@yahoo.com 5 years ago

      i read the article and it gives a lot of ideas when entering the so called marriage..thank you for this

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hello Grhealiza! You are more than welcome. I hope it helps. Thanks!

    • feenix profile image

      feenix 5 years ago

      Hello, Dexter,

      This is a terrific post. It is informative, interesting, educational and thought-provoking.

      When it comes to marriage, my problem is I am fickle and very shallow. I have always had a difficult time committing and quite often, I am drawn to a woman only because she looks good to me.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Feenix! I know what you mean. Marriage is for some and not for others. Thanks for the kind comments!

    • profile image

      SanXuary 5 years ago

      Excellent hub and all your points are on point with the truth. Determining all these features over time can take a while but I think I left a lot of dates behind for exactly all those reasons at one time or another. I often ask myself what I would tell the next guy if he was willing to listen about that person and ponder what the guy before me would have said. I wish people grew but most of the time they do not and there is a lot of bad stuff out there. Happy Hunting.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi SanXuary! I agree. You make some excellent observations. Thanks so much for reading!

    • gryphin423 profile image

      gryphin423 5 years ago from Florida

      Great hub Dexter! I'm happily married and I waited for the right guy to come along who shared all the same opinions on the big stuff. It makes such a difference! Thanks for sharing!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Gryphin423! Congratulations! You are so right. it does make a difference. Thank you!

    • Brian Burton profile image

      Brian Burton 5 years ago

      Dexter what a fantastic hub. Love this kind of thing. Is there a bigger decision in our lives than who we are going to marry? Great insight and from the heart!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Brian! You are right! as men, we need to be careful and wise about who we marry. It is a very important decision! Thanks so much!

    • profile image

      azam 5 years ago

      a very very useful hub, thanks for sharing bro

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Azam! Thank YOU for reading!

    • bethperry profile image

      Beth Perry 5 years ago from Tennesee

      I could kick myself for missing this one before. You have some G-R-E-A-T advise here, Dexter. Thumbs up and Voting up, too.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Beth! I am thrilled that you got a chance to read it! Thank you. I wrote this based upon a friend NOT choosing wisely. Thanks for the kind remarks and the votes up!

    • profile image

      Patty 5 years ago

      Wow, thanks for this great, insightful article!

    • profile image

      Patty 5 years ago

      Hi, I just posted a comment (after coming across this page randomly) that I think might sound sarcastic, or something (or maybe I'm just paranoid). So I thought I'd add that although I am female, I think you offer great advice! I find a lot of what you say applies to me, and what you wrote is so different from the tired, old advice usually dished out - it obviously comes from the heart as well as the head. Thanks :)

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Patty! I am glad you came across my hub and enjoyed it! Thank you so very much. And yes, it comes from the heart and the head!

    • one2recognize2 profile image

      one2recognize2 5 years ago from New York

      Very essential advise Dexter, loved this hub and so of course voted up.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi One2! Thank you so much!

    • profile image

      David 5 years ago

      Excellent advice Dexter and well written! It definitely shows the importance of choosing a wife wisely and for a man to be that person worthy to be chosen as well! Thank you very much, it was greatly appreciated!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      David! Wonderful. Thanks for taking the time to read it. And I appreciate your kind remarks. Thank YOU!

    • profile image

      Dragon fury 09 5 years ago

      Well written and great piece of advice for the single guys and gals. All true and wise advice but if every young, single person is to apply your advice here, those divorce lawyers would be out of jobs.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Dragon Fury! I say let's put those divorce lawyers out of business! Thanks for reading and the great comments!

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 5 years ago from Orlando, FL

      You have some excellent advice here Dex. I hope this hub helps someone out in their time of need. UP and sharing!

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      Elise 5 years ago

      Great article, Dexter!

      As a woman, I get really tired of hearing other women complain about some of these same issues. It's really nice to hear a man tell it like it is! My boyfriend and I constantly talk about this kind of stuff and how lucky we are to be in a healthy relationship. I think a lot of times women over look some of these same things when getting into a relationship or think that "they can change" their partners into being the man of their dreams. I think we need to live in reality and make good choices at the beginning and look for the red flags that the men we are interested in are not the right guys for us. They may be good guys, attractive, etc., but there is more to a relationship than those things.

      Thanks for the practical advice!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Elise! Thanks for the great comments. I agree with you wholeheartedly. It is better to deal with these issues in the beginning than in the end. Congrats on your great relationship! Thanks, again!

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      Annie 5 years ago from NewYork

      nice hub, very informative indeed

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi! Good to see you. I am so glad you enjoyed it!

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      Damian don 5 years ago

      It is my pleasure 2 read 2tru this article. Those who 've ears, let them hear! Thanks Dexter.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States

      Hi Damian! You are more than welcome. I hope it helps.

    • Alecia Murphy profile image

      Alecia Murphy 5 years ago from Wilmington, North Carolina

      I think this goes both ways. People picking a mate simply aren't choosy enough nor do they take enough time to really get to know a spouse. In many ways, I don't think anyone really knows themselves-we learn throughout our life who we are and the same goes for any relationship. Great, insightful hub!

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 5 years ago from Orlando, FL

      Thank you for sharing Dex! Outstanding hub!

    • girishpuri profile image

      Girish puri 4 years ago from NCR , INDIA

      Very nice suggestions and tips,but sometimes you can not fight with the destiny, useful hub.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 4 years ago from United States

      Hi Girishpuri! I agree, but sometimes you can avoid it. Thanks!

    • lrc7815 profile image

      Linda Crist 4 years ago from Central Virginia

      This should be required reading for any man thinking of making a commitment. An awesome hub loaded with important information.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 4 years ago from United States

      Hi Irc7815! Thanks for reading and commenting! It comes from years of experience!!! :-)

    • WillStarr profile image

      WillStarr 4 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

      How did I miss this gem? It's superb look at why so many marriages fail and how to avoid such a failure.

      What a great Hub, and shared.

    • ocbill profile image

      ocbill 4 years ago from hopefully somewhere peaceful and nice

      Great hub Dexter, I was actually one of those men. Luckily, I got out and am looking forward with more smiles.

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 4 years ago from United States

      Hi Ocbill! Thank you! And good for you!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image
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      Dexter Yarbrough 4 years ago from United States

      Thanks, Will! My inspiration came from a young guy I knew in a terrible, 5 year marriage that he got into for all the wrong reasons. Thanks for reading and sharing!

    • profile image

      Joseph Ephraim 2 years ago

      This is right on time for me. I am a still single male at 35. I decided to google any material on choosing a wife wisely when I noticed the temptation and pressure to settle for what is available instead of what is needed in marriage. This material has cleared things for me. I am really grateful that you shared this.

    • Joseph Ephraim profile image

      Joseph Ephraim 2 years ago from Abuja, Nigeria

      I am lucky to have stumbled on this beautiful write up early enough. At 35, I feel pressured to just settle for a person who clearly doesn't share similar interest. We must not have the same personality but at least each partner should be able to believe in what the other partner wants to achieve as a goal. God bless you real good.

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      Ndichem 7 months ago

      Hey Dexter, I have never been so moved by an advise on choosing a right wife! Thumbs up...I have wondered up till now on how to get the right woman in my life, but always I get it all wrong because I don't seek answers from the right people.

      I don't like adventures when it comes to relationships yet I want to get a potential wife that I will really love and respect and she will do same for me. I am 29 and have never been in any relation.....How do i start choosing this potential wife? What should I concentrate on initially?

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      The Very Truth 7 months ago

      Well back in the Past Most of the men in those days that really wanted to get married and have a family which came Very Easy for them to find a Very Good wife at that time. Most women too were Very Easy to meet as well the way our Family Members that were Very Blessed back then. And i would say that Most of the women years ago had very Good Manors, a very Good Personality, Polite, and Very Easy to start a Normal Conversation with them as well. Today it is a Totally Different Story since Most of the women now were Nothing at all like Most of the women were in the Past since the women back then Did Really put these women today to Real Shame. Now that many women today have their Careers which Most of them unfortunately are very high maintenance, independent, selfish, spoiled, greedy, picky, narcissists, and so very money hungry now more than ever. Their Attitude And Personality is very Awful since they will Curse at us men for just trying to start a Conversation with the one that we would really like to meet which has Happened to me already and a friend of mine had this Happened to him as well. Since so many women today are making a Six Figure Income which they Never made before since they will Only want the Best of all and will Never settle for Less. This is a Very Excellent Reason why the Good old fashioned women in the Past were the Best of all since Both men and women in those days had to Struggle to make ends meat which they had to Accept one another for who they were since they Hardly had any Money at all and were Living with their Parents anyway since the times were Tough back then. But the point that i am trying to make here is that Most women will Never go with a man that makes much Less Money than they make and will go with a man that has a lot of Money or if he is Very Rich which is a real Shame how the women of today have really Changed for the Worst. So for many of us Good men today that Really wanted to hopefully meet a Good woman and wanted to get Married to have a family as well which has become Very Difficult to find a Good Wife these days as you can see. It was just too very bad for us that we were Born at such a Very Bad Time Unfortunately and if many of us men had been Born many years Earlier which we Really Would've found Real Love ourselves and have our own Family that many of us still Don't Have Today.

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      TellingTheRealTruth 7 months ago

      For many of us Good men out there which for us it is very Scary to get married again after our Ex Wives Cheated on us which they really turned out to be real Low Life Pathetic Losers. And to lose everything you had at one time since the Courts always favor the women Most of the time unfortunately.

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