Sadie married her best friend 20 years ago and couldn't be happier. She thinks couples should aim to be each others' dearest companions.
Are you lucky enough to have fallen in love with and married your best friend? Or are you wondering if falling in love with your closest friend could work out for both of you? Here are four reasons why falling in love with and marrying your number one friend is the most amazing thing ever! I speak from experience: I fell in love with and married my friend and we've been an amazing team ever since. After 20 years of marriage, here's why I think spending the rest of your life with your best friend is awesome!
1. You Already Know About and Accept All of Your His or Her Flaws and Weaknesses
One of the things that many people claim when their relationships or marriages break up is that the other person 'changed.' Or they never really knew each other to begin with. But when you fall in love with your best friend, don't you already know him inside out?
Loving someone unconditionally without feeling the need to change who they are is one of the things that makes marriages last. The enduring support and encouragement that you get from your best friend is a form of unconditional love. You are allowed to be who you are with that person.
Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weaknesses.
— Ann Landers
2. You Already Know the In-Laws
Long before you fall in love with and marry your best friend, you'll likely have already met your in-laws and spent quite a bit of time getting to know them. When you are visiting your closest friend's parents and family there's no awkwardness. You don't have to feel like you are being assessed or sized up as relationship or marriage material. You are just the cool bestie who makes their son or daughter happy.
If your friend has a difficult relationship with his parents and family, there will be no surprises either. As your partner's closest confidante you'll have known many of the family secrets long before you become an official couple. You'll have yours eyes wide-open to your partner's family history, the good, the bad, and the downright funny.
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3. No One Gets Left Behind When the Two of You Get Together and Become a Couple
One of the challenges with dating someone who isn't your best friend but rather someone new you just started dating is that as you and your new romantic partner start to spend more and more time together getting to know one another and falling in love, your other friends may start to feel like they are being neglected. Your best friend, especially your closest friend of the opposite sex, might start to feel like he or she is just tagging along while you and your new boyfriend are having fun together.
If your best friend and your new dating partner have different personalities and interests, you may find your social life and love life being pulled in separate directions. But when the person you are dating is already your closest chum, then there's no need to worry about anyone getting left out. All of your other friends already know how tight the two of you are and so no one will feel jealous of the time that you spend together.
4. You Have Twice as Many Anniversaries as Everyone Else
Most couples have the standard set of anniversaries: first date, first kiss, first time together, first year as a couple, and so on. When you fall in love with and marry your best friend, you have even more special occasions to celebrate. You get to celebrate both the day you first met and the day you realized that you were in love with each other. One of the things that I appreciate most about being with my husband is that we have such a long, beautiful shared history. We have the years that we spent together as each others' closest companions followed by our years together as both as number one friends and married lovers---over 25 years.
Here are even more reasons falling in love with your best friend is so spectacular:
- You can finish each others' sentences without even trying.
- You have a huge collection of inside jokes.
- Normal bodily functions don't get in the way of a good date (and can sometimes be funny, or gross, or both!).
- You already know how to entertain one another when you are bored.
- You don't have to put up with the weekend dating scene at clubs and bars anymore.
- The same goes for online dating—when you fall in love with your best friend, you bypass all the risks associated with online dating. You already know that he's a great, trustworthy guy!
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
© 2016 Sadie Holloway