How to Keep Your Husband Happy

Updated on November 2, 2018
whitneybraun profile image

I'm happily married to a fantastic man that I love deeply and completely.

Use these methods to keep your husband happy and your marriage full of love.
Use these methods to keep your husband happy and your marriage full of love. | Source

Dealing with an unhappy husband can be absolutely miserable. After the initial wedding bliss wears off and everything goes back to normal, things can often get tough pretty quickly. Here are 20 ways to keep your husband happy.

Keep in mind that there are plenty of other ways you can make him happy as well, the main thing to understand is that you want to do things for him that he will appreciate and notice. If he notices that you are working hard to make him happy, he will reciprocate those feelings.

20 Ways to Make Your Husband Happy

  1. Show Him Respect
  2. Show Interest in His Hobbies
  3. Have Consistent Sex
  4. Do Something Unexpected for Him
  5. Be the Best Version of Yourself
  6. Let Things Go
  7. Take Care of Him
  8. Don't Nag
  9. Trust Him
  10. Call Him out When He Does Something Wrong
  11. Stop Trying to Change Him
  12. Send Him Sexy and Flirty Texts
  13. Be Understanding
  14. Make a Comfortable Home
  15. Cook for Him
  16. Take Care of Yourself
  17. Tell Him You Love Him
  18. Lower Your Expectations
  19. Lighten Up
  20. If Something's Bad, Try to Make it Better

1. Show Respect

Make sure your husband knows that he is your number one, even if you don't feel like he is always respectful to you. Don't degrade him in front of his family or friends. Always be respectful of how he feels about something even if you might not agree.

Make sure that he knows that you respect him, even if you don't say it to his face all of the time. Men want to know that they are respected, and much of their unhappiness and anger comes from feeling like they are being disrespected by someone else.

2. Show Interest in His Hobbies

This doesn't mean you have to be with him every time he plays basketball with his buddies. More so, be aware of the things he likes. If he really likes to hunt, subscribe to a hunting magazine that he likes or buy him a piece of gear that you know he's had his eye on. Being interested does not all ways have to mean being fully involved.

Give him enough space so that can enjoy his hobbies. That does not mean you have to take up the same hobbies as him: if he wants to go rock out on guitar in the garage, let him go ahead and do it.

3. Have Sex

This may seem like an obvious statement, but very important. I'm not just saying have sex a couple of times a week. Be totally invested in the act as much as possible. Sex is a very important and essential act to men. Show him you love him by loving on him. Get into the act and set your insecurities aside. This is the man you said your vows to and are going to spend the rest of your life with. Explore each other's bodies and have fun. Try to initiate sex some of the time as that will spice things up and make your husband even more excited for some fun in bed.

Of course, if you feel uncomfortable about something, let him know about it. Your husband wants you to be happy and comfortable as well.

4. Do Something Unexpected

Stop by the grocery store or bakery on your way home and pick up his favorite treat. Book a weekend away together. Give him a massage when he gets home. It's not always the job of a man to do these kinds of things. As a dedicated wife, you must surprise your husband and remind him of the fun woman he fell in love with. Believe me; he will appreciate the gesture and be thrilled that you did something so thoughtful.

5. Be Yourself

Be the woman he knows sitting at home on the couch. This doesn't mean you need to belch in public or walk around in your sweatpants all the time. This just means you don't have to put up a front for the ladies in your child's class or act snotty in front of his friends. You are who he fell in love with, so you should never feel like you have to be someone else. Be respectful and courteous when you are both in public, but don't try to hide who you are. Having that strong sense of self and high levels of self-confidence are what made him attracted to you in the first place.

6. Let Things Go

If there is something that your husband did in the past that really upset you, yet you have said you have forgiven him for, just let it go. Whether it's the anniversary he forgot, or heaven forbid the woman he slept with while you two were dating. If you have said you have forgiven him, stop bringing it up. It may be an easy way to push his buttons in an unrelated argument, but know it is detrimental to any relationship to hold on to things that are meant to stay in the past.

This same approach should be applied to the other things he does that may bother you from time to time. Don't get hung up about things, and if he does something that you really dislike, just let him know. Holding on to little things and petty grudges is not a good idea for you or your husband. Many of the little annoyances you may have you will forget about in a few weeks anyway, so it is not worth it to get upset over them.

7. Take Care of Him

When your husband is feeling under the weather, take care of him. Don't make fun of him because he's acting like a baby. Most likely, he is acting like a baby, but let him know you are there for him. Make him his favorite meal, go to the store to get medicine, and let him watch his favorite TV show. In the same respect, if he is just having a crappy day, give him his space and let him know that you are there for him if he needs you.

Men want to feel loved and needed, so let him know how much you care about him, it will make a big difference.

8. Don't Nag

This is probably one of the most obvious statement, but often the hardest to do. If there is something your husband does that drives you crazy, let him know, in a calm matter of fact way. Don't constantly be on his case for something. Especially something he can't immediately change. Nagging causes annoyance. Annoyance eventually causes resentment. Let him know why his actions are making you upset and annoying you. Being clear about what kind of behavior bothers you will help him be more accommodating and conscientious.

9. Trust

Unless your husband has given your real reason to not trust him, always give him the benefit of the doubt. Most likely you have been cheated on or hurt in a past relationship, but don't let that baggage follow you into your marriage. Don't snoop in his phone, check his email, or spy on him when he's out with his friends. Let him know that you trust him and he will do all that he can to ensure he does not break your trust.

10. Call Him Out

Yep, you heard me right, call him out when he is wrong. Don't let him walk all over you. Be the strong, independent woman he fell in love with. Don't bend over to anything he says just to make it easier for his ego. Men like it when you call them out in a respectful manner. Explain to him what he has done wrong and try to not make it personal and tear him down.

Let him know that your criticism is coming from a place of love and concern. Many men do not even realize when they have done something wrong, so making him more aware of his mistakes will, in turn, make him into a better person as well.

11. Stop Trying to Change Him

Don't try to change your guy into someone, that he obviously is not. Unless, it is something that is causing him harm (alcoholism, smoking, drugs, etc.), there is no reason to change. If you married him for who he is, let him stay who he is.

You can challenge him to be the best version of himself but thinking that you can just erase part of his personality if you nag him enough is crazy. Let him be himself fully and completely because it is that version that you fell in love with in the first place. Trying to change his base nature is a mistake and leads to even more conflicts.

12. Send Him Sexy Texts

Let him know you're thinking about him. Not every day, but maybe once a week or so send him a cute text letting him know what you want to do with him when he gets home. Get flirty and cute with him, just like it was when the two of you first started dating. He will enjoy the gesture, particularly if it is during the middle of the workday when he is feeling down and bored. Adding that kind of excitement and spontaneity back into your lives is a great way to keep things interesting.

13. Be Understanding

If something comes up with his work schedule and he has to stay for a late meeting, don't freak. Yeah, sure, he missed dinner (again), but at least he is calling and letting you know. From time to time, things will come up where you will be disappointed. Don't overreact, take a deep breathe and understand. Try to not take things personally, as your husband is already stressed out enough from those types of situations.

14. Comfortable Home

Depending on if you're a stay-at-home mom or work yourself is all relative. If you stay home with the kids during the day, make sure your home is inviting when you're husband is almost home. Pick up the little things. Of course, it can't always be perfect, but try to make home as relaxing as possible. Don't pass the kids off immediately when he walks in the door. Let him unwind. If you work as well, share responsibilities when you get home, or do the things you know he dreads the most.

If you do not work at home, then take some time on the weekend to tidy things up. You can go in and rearrange things and get rid of clutter. Even something as simple as this will have a big impact on your husband's mood. He will be happy that you took the time to make the home a more inviting place.

15. Cook for Him

Obviously, we can't all be Suzy homemaker. Especially if we have a career of our own. But, take the time to cook for him from time to time. If you aren't a great cook, learn a few of his favorite dishes and try to perfect them. Use the endless food blogs and even Pinterest to find some new creations that can be simple and fast. Making an effort will show that you care about him and his tummy.

Good food goes a long way to bringing people together, and making a great meal for your husband is a great way for you to show him how much you love him. Plus, you get to enjoy a good meal as well!

16. Take Care of Yourself

We can't all have flat stomachs and perfectly applied makeup at all times. But, you can do simple things for him (and yourself) to show him your beauty. Sometimes marriages can put us in a rut, and we no longer think it's necessary to look nice for our spouse. Brush your teeth, take a shower, and leave the ratty sweatpants in the drawer. Do yoga when you can, wear your favorite little sundress, and flaunt what you have! Your husband will likely return the favor and make himself look amazing!

Men are intoxicated by feminine beauty, so looking good for him will make him appreciate you even more than he already does.

17. Tell Him You Love Him

Sometimes, as a woman, we can forget how vulnerable our man is. Make sure you tell him you love him, often. Just as we like to be told we are loved and cuddled, men like to be reassured with the same. Make sure he knows how much he means to you. Men want to feel loved and wanted, even if they don't always show it. Reminding him of how much he means to you is a heartfelt gesture that will make him feel wanted and loved.

18. Don't Expect Too Much

Life is not a romantic comedy. Men do not always have the suavest things to say. Don't expect every day to be a fairytale. Your man is going to mess up, and he's going to mess up a lot. Don't always expect after every fight a long letter of apology or a dozen roses.

Sure, it would be nice every once in a while, but realize that men are wired differently than us. What we are thinking in our head that he should do is almost always not what he is going to do. Realize that all those romantic movies are most likely written by women. Don't let your expectations exceed your reality because you've been watching too many romantic comedies and reading too many books.

19. Lighten up

Remember when you and your husband first starting dating? You were the carefree woman who laughed and flirted? Life's stress can really take a toll on a relationship, and sometimes we forget to laugh. Flirt with your husband. Tell stupid jokes. Reminisce about funny things that happened. Life can't always be fun and games, but let it be sometimes. Keep the humor going between the two of you and keep things funny and fun.

20. If Something's Bad, Try to Make it Better

Inevitably, there will be bumpy times in your relationship. If it has come to a point that you're not sure where to turn, try your hardest to make things right. This doesn't mean endlessly talk about what you should be doing, do it! Schedule the counseling session. If you truly love your husband and want to make things right, don't always expect him to make the first step.

Don't just expect things to get better without work: if there are issues with your relationship, try to sort them out. Holding on to hate and negativity never solves the issue, and it only makes things worse.

Taking a trip to a scenic location is a great way to impress your husband and show him how much you love him.
Taking a trip to a scenic location is a great way to impress your husband and show him how much you love him. | Source

How to Impress Your Husband

Here are four things you can do that will impress your husband. He will be thrilled that you took the time to plan and surprise him.

  1. Get Him a Gift: Go out and get him a thoughtful gift and surprise him with it after he comes home from work. He will appreciate the gesture and the thoughtfulness you put into getting the gift. If you have not already done so, getting him a framed photograph of the two of you makes for a great gift and one that he will appreciate.
  2. Make His Favorite Meal: Surprise him with his favorite meal, or if you are not the cooking type, take him to his favorite restaurant. The key here is to drop little hints and build his anticipation. That way his excitement will be high when you surprise him. Having his favorite food with his favorite person will make him happy, and he will be impressed at the thought and detail you put into it.
  3. Plan a Trip: Depending on how big you want to go, a simple weekend getaway somewhere you can drive to can work. You can pick a secluded spot to go camping or go wine tasting, something to give you two a break from the monotony of everyday life.
  4. Take Him Out on a Fancy Date: Plan a date night just like the old days when you two were first getting to know each other. It doesn't just have to be dinner either; you can plan a fun activity, such as going to a concert or a stand-up comedy show.

A framed photograph of the two of you makes for a great gift.
A framed photograph of the two of you makes for a great gift. | Source

Of course, these things won't always create a perfect marriage. Do the things you know makes your husband happy and enjoy the ride that is marriage!

What do you do that makes your husband happy? Men, what do you wish your wife would do?

© 2013 Whitney

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    • profile image

      ©™ Queen™© 

      46 hours ago

      That's brilliant

    • profile image

      Dear faiza 

      2 weeks ago

      This message meant for faiza. Don't be afraid of the future dear... speak to him openly... and tell him how much you love him and there is nothing which can replace him in your life. Tell him without him you will not be there. and the very important thing is, when you speak to him don't be harsh and don't tend to question him(why are you doing so...etc). speak to him like you already understood the situation. And show the affection like he is your son. Make him understand that you will be there for him in every aspect of life..... ........don't cry in front of him suddenly..let him understand you need him. After that if you need to cry you can::)).I mean control your emotions a while please.

      And in case of using drugs, make him engaged in other things like family get together, outing with kids etc. Don't always think of his bad habit. When he is not using any drugs act like everything is going ok. And force him to go out with you and your kids. Make use of kids. If they force, and you support he will definitely spend time with you and slowly slowly he could get out of drugs. Relax and pray to God he will stay with you.

      With love. Faizy rajeeb.

    • profile image

      Shammil Mueni 

      3 weeks ago

      I Do All Thing That My Husband Can Be Happy But He Don't Trust Me And He Still Doubt Me

    • profile image

      Faiza 

      2 months ago

      Hi i dont really know what to say but im in a problem where i have being married for the past 5 years and got 2 baby boys . My hubby at first was happy and things and all of a sudden things changed and from the begining of 2018 my hubby started taking drugs i mean have drugs coz each time he gets paid he resorts to drugs and when i confront him he doesnt give me answers but instead he blames me for everything , tells me that i got someone else etc. And this really hurts me alot because i love my hubby only and no one else ill do anything for my hubby but by the way my hubby talks to me , it really really hurts me . Can anyone i mean anyone help me ? Coz i dont want to lose my hubby his the father of my kids n we love him alot

    • profile image

      Elizabeth AE 

      2 months ago

      Worth Said the above words/Sentences .... its rally Helpful,

      keep on updating more be will beneficial for Others.

    • profile image

      AshLipton 

      2 months ago

      Some solid tips in this article.

      It's also really worth learning to connect with him on a deep, emotional level. Day to day life can often get in the way of marriage and it's so important to keep the flame burning. There's a really good guide on this at: http://www.whathewants.info

      All in all, he's lucky that you're reading an article teaching you how to make him happy!

    • profile image

      J Madit Wai 

      4 months ago

      these are wonderful tips. i have seen any of them from my rib(wife) to me.

    • profile image

      Kelly 

      4 months ago

      What if your doing all the above and more like telling him if he dont want to work then don't stay home I'll work two jobs if needed. He does that for few months then complains about being home all the time so he gets a job then complains about working. I cook dinner and always serve him first no matter if he has a job and works or if hes sat around playing xbox for months. My kids are all teens one is a new mom. They arent his. We have no children together. He says he hates my kids and talks about how my daughter is stupid fot having a baby at 17 maybe not wise choice on her part but shes not stupid. He complains about them not doing what there told around the house but he dont do anything either. I am constantly complimenting him on how handsome he is how smart and wonder he is no matter how down he is on himself. I am constantly rubbing his arms neck back legs with just my fingertips cause thats his favorite thing. I do sexual things ive never done before cause he likes them. He tells me im the best wife ever best hes never loved anyone like me that he never wants to lose me but yet hes always saying i cant do this i hate my life im tired of this and that.... i give up!

    • profile image

      Karen Marcial 

      6 months ago

      Few Month ago I found out that my husband is cheating on me with other girl he meet tru online dating and he full in love with her they only talk and text on the phone seen each other one or twice only and his telling me that his heart is no longer there what should I do to win his heart back

    • profile image

      Tia 

      6 months ago

      I love my husband...last year I cheated him.. now he knows all truth ... I realy feeling bad for my past.. n forget all..i love him only.. but now he don't trust me... What can I do....

    • profile image

      AU 

      6 months ago

      my husband really love me before 1year and then he didn't respond me for everything i always try my best to happy my huaband but he can't understand me he always said me i was lie to him but it is not truth its just understanding am really upset and worry for that i really love him i leave every thing for him and he also i have no more option to correct my relation plz tell me what shall i do

    • profile image

      Jaibo 

      7 months ago

      l like it

    • profile image

      Kandy 

      11 months ago

      This is a spot on article.

      In some of the comments, women have been very negative. The article states men are wired deferantly. When a man does something good, thank him, tell him IN SIMPLE WORDS, with a smile, how much you appreciate or love whatever he did. IE... When he does take a shower, hug him up look him in the eyes and tell him how good he smells, how you love when he's smelling all fresh and clean. If you tell a man what pleases you, he will do it again!

      Ask him if he "WOULD" (Don't use the word will) help you do something. IE... Baby, I'm so tired after work, would you help me clean up the kitchen? When he does, praise him for it. ( in simple words with a big smile ) Thanks for helping me in the kitchen. I really appreciate you!

      Men want to take care of their wifes!!! If you are always telling him he bad, he will resent you. IE... You never help me clean the kitchen. Now you have blamed him for doing wrong and in his simple mind, he didn't even know you wanted help, so he feels resentful.

    • profile image

      Pallavi pranav 

      11 months ago

      My husband loves me but he don't know how to express because of that I always get upset what shall I do for that

    • profile image

      esyearning 

      12 months ago

      Hello everyone, I find this article really usefull and most of the tips here should be added in our day to day practices.

      A happy married life is a blessing. I came accross a good ste on the same topic sharing it here as I think might be helpfull for you all: http://www.howtomakehusbandhappy.com/

    • profile image

      Rebbica 

      17 months ago

      Well said!

    • profile image

      marneen 

      17 months ago

      how to get hubby

      to take a shower and change ??

    • profile image

      namubiru jaria 

      20 months ago

      thank's but don't stop to give us tips

    • profile image

      charlotte. 

      22 months ago

      Thank you for your advice. I will practice from today.

    • profile image

      Pria Chowdhury 

      23 months ago

      I Love my Husband and He also loves me...but we don't understand each other..... why it happens..????..

    • profile image

      sitti 

      23 months ago

      Thanks for this!

    • profile image

      Kaiziea 

      2 years ago

      Right, My husband is very stubborn and hates doctors or anything. So everything's a challenge but I always tend to keep the house tidy even when we are both working. And I always cook because he can't cook lol. But he was the one I married, and I intend on keeping him for the rest of my life. So ladies, don't be afraid of anything because that stopped us in the beginning because I felt ugly to him but you have to learn to let things go in marriage.

    • profile image

      PMARTIN 

      4 years ago

      "Wife" and "independent woman " seems to be a contradiction BUT..anyway, one point is good to remember(just my opinion) is that if you're too proud (stephanie) or lazy to do these things, there is a woman somewhere watching and waiting. She do these things for him. She is at his job, church golf resort, gym. she's your best friend or even your relative. I think women have an instinctive way to tell that a man isn't being taken care of at home. Get rid of pride and take care of your man.

    • CrisSp profile image

      CrisSp 

      5 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Good, useful hub.

      We abide by the old cliché, "when something's is broken fix it, don't just throw it." --happy to share that this summer, we celebrated our 25th year. How amazing! I never thought we've come this far but then again, we both see ourselves growing old together.

      My hubby calls me from work at least once a day just to say, sweet nothings mixed with sarcasm and humour at times. If he doesn't get me, he'll leave a message. If before the end of the day, I don't hear from him, I'd call him to remind him that he forgot to call his beautiful wife. Lol! And, this is part of our everyday lives.

      I guess, bottom line is give and take.

      Thanks.

    • profile image

      Stephanie 

      5 years ago

      What ever happened to a mutual relationship? I should be able to expect these same things in return. I wonder why I should do these things when I do not get them myself?

    • iguidenetwork profile image

      iguidenetwork 

      5 years ago from Austin, TX

      I do and say pretty much a number of the same things to my wife as well. Voted up and useful.

    • LadyLLD profile image

      LadyLLD 

      5 years ago

      I absolutely love your tips. They are all so true. Sometimes as married women we have to give and take to make our relationships work for ourselves and our children. It is difficult sometimes when you think that you are the only one being considerate and making an effort, but sometimes that's what it takes when you really love your man. There is really no point arguing all the time. This will only cause misery and hatred in the relationship. I personally love being sexy for my husband. I aslo respect him, take care of the house and cook although I do not really like to cook. Doing these things make me feel like a stronger woman; like I am able to take care of myself and my family.

    • AmandaJon profile image

      Amanda Jones 

      5 years ago

      Great tips! I believe these advice to a lot of married couples! Voted up and useful.

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