How to Keep Your Husband Happy

Updated on September 26, 2016

You know . . . There is a name for people who are always wrong about everything all the time . . . Husband!

— Bill Maher

All joking aside, dealing with an unhappy husband can be absolutely miserable. After the initial wedding bliss wears off and everything goes back to normal things can often get tough pretty quickly. Here are 20 ways to keep your husband happy.

Happy Husband, Happy Life

1. Show respect.

Make sure your husband knows that he is your number one. Even if you don't feel like he is always respectful to you. Don't degrade him in front of his family or friends. Always be respectful of how he feels about something even if you might not agree.

2. Show interest in his hobbies.

This doesn't mean you have to be with him every time he plays basketball with his buddies. More so, be aware of the things he likes. If he really like to hunt, subscribe to a hunting magazine that he likes or buy him a piece of gear that you know he's had his eye on. Being interested does not all ways have to mean being fully involved.

3. Have sex.

This may seem like an obvious statement, but very important. I'm not just saying have sex a couple times a week. I mean, enjoy sex. Initiate sex. Be totally invested in the act as much as possible. Sex is a very important and essential act to men. Show him you love him by loving on him. Get into the act and set you insecurities aside. This is the man you said your vows to and are going to spend the rest of your life with. Explore each other's bodies and have fun!

4. Do something unexpected.

Stop by the grocery store or bakery on your way home and pick up his favorite treat. Book a weekend away together. Give him a massage when he gets home. It's not always the job of a man to do these kinds of things. As a dedicated wife, you must surprise your husband and remind him of the fun woman he fell in love with.

5. Be yourself, all the time.

Be yourself. Be the woman he knows sitting at home on the couch. This doesn't mean you need to belch in public or walk around in your holey sweatpants all the time. This just means, don't put up a front for the ladies in your child's class or act snotty in front of his friends. You are who he fell in love with, never feel like you have to be someone else.

6. Let it go.

If there is something that your husband did in the past that really upset you, yet you have said you have forgiven him for, just let it go. Whether it's the anniversary he forgot or heaven forbid the woman he slept with while you two were dating. If you have said you have forgiven him, stop bringing it up. It may be an easy way to push his buttons in an unrelated argument, but know it is detrimental to any relationship to hold on to things that are meant to stay in the past.

7. Take care of him.

When your husband is feeling under the weather, take care of him. Don't make fun of him because he's acting like a baby. Most likely, he is acting like a baby, but let him know you are there for him. Make him his favorite meal, go to the store to get medicane, and let him watch his favorite TV show. In the same respect, if he is just having a crappy day, give him his space and let him know that you are there for him if he needs you.

8. Don't nag.

This is probably one of the most obvious statement, but often the hardest to comply to. If there is something your husband does that drives you crazy, let him know, in a calm matter of fact way. Don't constantly be on his case for something. Especially something he can't immediately change. Nagging causes annoyance. Annoyance eventually causes resentment.

9. Trust.

Unless your husband has given your real reason to not trust him, always give him the benefit of the doubt. Most likely you have been cheated on or hurt in a past relationship, but don't let that baggage follow you into your marriage. Don't snoop in his phone, check his email, or spy on him when he's out with his friends.

10. Call him out.

Yep, you heard me right, call him out---when he is wrong. Don't let him walk all over you. Be the strong, independent woman he fell in love with. Don't bend over to anything he says just to "make it easier". Men respect when you call them out in a respectful manner.

11. Stop trying to change him.

Don't try to change your guy into someone, that he obviously is not. Unless, it is something that is causing him harm (alcoholism, smoking, drugs, etc.), there is no reason to change. If you married him for who he is, let him stay who he is.

12. Send him sexy texts.

Let him know you're thinking about him. Not everyday, all day. But once a week or so, send him a cute text letting him know what you want to do with him when he gets home.

13. Be understanding.

If something comes up with his work schedule and he has to stay for a late meeting, don't freak. Yeah, sure, he missed dinner (again), but at least he is calling and letting you know. From time to time, things will come up where you will be disappointed. Don't overreact, take a deep breathe and understand.

14. Comfortable home.

Depending on if you're a stay-at-home mom or work yourself is all relative. If you stay home with the kids during the day, make sure your home is inviting when you're husband is almost home. Pick up the little things. Of course, it can't always be perfect, but try to make home as relaxing as possible. Don't pass the kids off immediately when he walks in the door. Let him unwind. If you work as well, share responsibilities when you get home, or do the things you know he dreads the most.

15. Cook for him.

Obviously, we can't all be Suzy homemaker. Especially if we have a career of our own. But, take the time to cook for him from time to time. If you aren't a great cook, learn a few of his favorite dishes and try to perfect them. Use the endless food blogs and even Pinterest to find some new creations that can be simple and fast. Making the effort will show that you care about him and his tummy.

16. Take care of yourself.

We can't all have flat stomachs and perfectly applied makeup at all times. But, you can do simple things for him (and yourself) to show him your beauty. Sometimes marriages can put us in a rut and we no longer think it's necessary to look nice for our spouse. Brush your teeth, take a shower, and leave the ratty sweatpants in the drawer. Do yoga when you can, wear your favorite little sundress, and flaunt what you have! Your husband will likely return the favor and make himself look amazing!

17. Tell him you love him.

Sometimes, as a woman, we can can forget how vulnerable our man is. Make sure you tell him you love him, often. Just as we like to be told we are loved and cuddled, men like to be reassured with the same. Make sure he knows how much he means to you.

18. Don't expect too much.

Life is not a romantic comedy. Men do not always have the most suave things to say. Don't expect every day to be a fairy tail. Your man is going to mess up, and he's going to mess up a lot. Don't always expect after every fight a long letter of apology or a dozen roses. Sure, it would be nice every once in a while, but realize that men are wired differently than us. What we are thinking in our head that he should do it most always NOT what he is going to do. Realize that all those romantic movies are most likely written by women.

19. Lighten up.

Remember when you and your husband first starting dating? You were the carefree woman who laughed and flirted? Life's stress can really take a toll on a relationship, and sometimes we forget to laugh. Flirt with your husband. Tell stupid jokes. Reminisce about funny things that happened. Life can't always be fun and games, but let it be sometimes.

20. If something's bad, try to make it better.

Inevitably, there will be bumpy times in your relationship. If it has come to a point that you're not sure where to turn, try you hardest to make things right. This doesn't mean endlessly talk about what you should be doing, DO IT! Schedule the counseling session. If you truly love your husband and want to make things right, don't always expect him to make the first step.

Of course, 20 things won't always create a perfect marriage. Do the things you know makes your husband happy and enjoy the ride that is marriage!

What do you do that makes your husband happy? Men, what do you wish your wife would do?


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    • profile image

      Kandy 5 weeks ago

      This is a spot on article.

      In some of the comments, women have been very negative. The article states men are wired deferantly. When a man does something good, thank him, tell him IN SIMPLE WORDS, with a smile, how much you appreciate or love whatever he did. IE... When he does take a shower, hug him up look him in the eyes and tell him how good he smells, how you love when he's smelling all fresh and clean. If you tell a man what pleases you, he will do it again!

      Ask him if he "WOULD" (Don't use the word will) help you do something. IE... Baby, I'm so tired after work, would you help me clean up the kitchen? When he does, praise him for it. ( in simple words with a big smile ) Thanks for helping me in the kitchen. I really appreciate you!

      Men want to take care of their wifes!!! If you are always telling him he bad, he will resent you. IE... You never help me clean the kitchen. Now you have blamed him for doing wrong and in his simple mind, he didn't even know you wanted help, so he feels resentful.

    • profile image

      Pallavi pranav 8 weeks ago

      My husband loves me but he don't know how to express because of that I always get upset what shall I do for that

    • profile image

      esyearning 2 months ago

      Hello everyone, I find this article really usefull and most of the tips here should be added in our day to day practices.

      A happy married life is a blessing. I came accross a good ste on the same topic sharing it here as I think might be helpfull for you all:

    • profile image

      Rebbica 7 months ago

      Well said!

    • profile image

      marneen 7 months ago

      how to get hubby

      to take a shower and change ??

    • profile image

      namubiru jaria 10 months ago

      thank's but don't stop to give us tips

    • profile image

      charlotte. 12 months ago

      Thank you for your advice. I will practice from today.

    • profile image

      Pria Chowdhury 13 months ago

      I Love my Husband and He also loves me...but we don't understand each other..... why it happens..????..

    • profile image

      sitti 13 months ago

      Thanks for this!

    • profile image

      Kaiziea 16 months ago

      Right, My husband is very stubborn and hates doctors or anything. So everything's a challenge but I always tend to keep the house tidy even when we are both working. And I always cook because he can't cook lol. But he was the one I married, and I intend on keeping him for the rest of my life. So ladies, don't be afraid of anything because that stopped us in the beginning because I felt ugly to him but you have to learn to let things go in marriage.

    • profile image

      PMARTIN 3 years ago

      "Wife" and "independent woman " seems to be a contradiction BUT..anyway, one point is good to remember(just my opinion) is that if you're too proud (stephanie) or lazy to do these things, there is a woman somewhere watching and waiting. She do these things for him. She is at his job, church golf resort, gym. she's your best friend or even your relative. I think women have an instinctive way to tell that a man isn't being taken care of at home. Get rid of pride and take care of your man.

    • CrisSp profile image

      CrisSp 4 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Good, useful hub.

      We abide by the old cliché, "when something's is broken fix it, don't just throw it." --happy to share that this summer, we celebrated our 25th year. How amazing! I never thought we've come this far but then again, we both see ourselves growing old together.

      My hubby calls me from work at least once a day just to say, sweet nothings mixed with sarcasm and humour at times. If he doesn't get me, he'll leave a message. If before the end of the day, I don't hear from him, I'd call him to remind him that he forgot to call his beautiful wife. Lol! And, this is part of our everyday lives.

      I guess, bottom line is give and take.


    • profile image

      Stephanie 4 years ago

      What ever happened to a mutual relationship? I should be able to expect these same things in return. I wonder why I should do these things when I do not get them myself?

    • iguidenetwork profile image

      iguidenetwork 4 years ago from Austin, TX

      I do and say pretty much a number of the same things to my wife as well. Voted up and useful.

    • LadyLLD profile image

      LadyLLD 4 years ago

      I absolutely love your tips. They are all so true. Sometimes as married women we have to give and take to make our relationships work for ourselves and our children. It is difficult sometimes when you think that you are the only one being considerate and making an effort, but sometimes that's what it takes when you really love your man. There is really no point arguing all the time. This will only cause misery and hatred in the relationship. I personally love being sexy for my husband. I aslo respect him, take care of the house and cook although I do not really like to cook. Doing these things make me feel like a stronger woman; like I am able to take care of myself and my family.

    • AmandaJon profile image

      Amanda Jones 4 years ago

      Great tips! I believe these advice to a lot of married couples! Voted up and useful.