I'm in a long distance relationship. We hardly see each other but communication was strong. Now he goes days without calling and when I call or text, he doesn't reply or return my calls untill days after. I've talked to him several times about it, but he blames it on his new job. It's not the first time he's gone silent on me with no explanation, leaving me guessing and wondering what I did wrong. He neither replies to texts nor returns my calls. Do I have a narcissistic partner?

Answer

I can't say whether your partner is narcissistic, passive-aggressive, emotionally abusive, or none of these. What's quite apparent from your question, though, is that you're unhappy with the way things are. You don't need a diagnosis of him to know that this isn't what you want.

Dating is the time to determine whether two people are a match and, when you discover you're not, it's time to leave. Sadly, many women become attached too quickly, lose all objectively, and become hell-bent on making the relationship work...even to the point of it being unhealthy for them. If you step back from your situation, though, you will see that this man's behavior isn't kind and loving and not indicative of someone who wants to make this relationship a priority in his life.

I recommend you look at why you're in a long-distance relationship in the first place. What does it say about you? How does it contribute to the problems you're now facing? Why are you not ready for a relationship with someone who's close in proximity but also emotionally close? Why are you keeping a distance? What is making you scared?

It's much easier (and more enjoyable) to diagnose other people than ourselves. However, this seems like a wonderful opportunity for self-reflection so you can then move forward into a more loving, respectful, and reciprocal relationship. Albert Einstein said, “No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.” Therefore, you need to look deep in order to avoid making this a pattern in your life.

Updated on August 23, 2019

Original Article:

7 Questions to Ask When Determining Whether Your Partner Is a Narcissist or Just Self-Absorbed
By McKenna Meyers
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