I was in a 4-year relationship with her. She cheated in the first year of our relationship. I forgave her but my lack of trust grew. This caused lots of problems. We had an argument then she broke up with me. Should I just move on?

Answer

I'm sure you love her but you don't trust her as you used to when the two of you fell in love. If that trust doesn't exist, there is no need to try to revive the relationship. A lack of trust indicates your love for her isn't the same. It has diminished. You no longer love her the way you used to. Additionally, this means your feelings for her have diminished.

In such a scenario, it's best to move on.

It's difficult to gain back someone's trust. It's difficult to trust a person in the manner you used to before the person became unfaithful in the relationship.

You should take your time and evaluate how you feel for her and the relationship. Would you want to continue with her? If you want, what about your trust for her? Will you ever trust her the way you used to? Will you ever love her the way you used? Will you enjoy living with her by forgetting what she did?

You should think of these things for the period which you'll not contact her - no contact rule. This should take a minimum of one month. After a month of analyzing and evaluating everything related to the relationship and her, make your decision. If you feel you don't want to revive the relationship, send her a final text thanking her for the time you spent together. Ask her to forgive you if you hurt her one way or another. Also, let her know you've forgiven her and want the two of you to part ways in a peaceful manner. This act will enable you to recover from the breakup and move on.

Updated on August 12, 2019

Original Article:

How to Respond Maturely When Someone Breaks Up With You
By Benny Njuguna
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