From the small amount you've written here, I can tell your definition of 'love' is very different from his. I respect the guy for not saying 'I love you' until he's ready to fully commit to someone for the rest of his life. And I fully understand what he means when he says he doesn't know what love is.
In my youth, I can remember thinking I was in love, until years later when I really fell in love, and suddenly my previous relationships were exposed as pretty lame compared to the real thing. Yep, I think the guy you say you're in love with is pretty smart. When he's ready to commit to someone for the rest of his life, he'll be in love.
Forget about trying to 'help him understand what love is.' He already knows. He might not have experienced the feeling yet, but he knows what he's waiting for. More power to him.
If you want a boyfriend who tells you he loves you before he really knows you or feels confident you're really 'the one', I think you'd better look for another guy.
But if you really are in love with this guy, I think you're going to have to accept you can be boyfriend and girlfriend with lots of the trimmings and advantages of being in a relationship, without declaring undying love and planning a marriage. Yes, maybe he'll fall in love with you in time. But he's obviously a guy who won't be pushed. So you either stay with him and see if love grows between you, or you don't.