You don’t say how long ago you and your ex split up. In the early stages of a breakup, it is perfectly normal to feel an array of emotions. Most people will gradually come to terms with what has happened. Addiction begins when you are unable or unwilling to let go. This is not a healthy state of mind and you appear to be on the verge of this, by saying that you are obsessed with keeping your love alive.
It is vital you recognize that you are the only person who is responsible for your happiness. Don’t waste any more time dwelling on the past. You need to move forward. Have a read of my article on the powerful benefits of the no contact rule. You may find it of some benefit to help you pull through this challenging time.