I was in an emotionally abusive marriage for nearly twenty years. My ex-husband did not believe in counseling either, because it is what crazy people do. When I finally tried to kill myself, I realized that I needed help, if not for me, then to protect my children. I began secretly going to a counselor, and I learned that I can only control myself. It is not your responsibility to make another person happy, nor is it their responsibility to make you happy. If you feel trapped, I'd suggest you find a way to get yourself out of the abusive situation. Create a network of people who will support, encourage and help you. It takes time to find friends you can trust, but they can be an invaluable resource. If he doesn't allow you to have access to friends or family, then I would find the nearest battered women's shelter, and be honest. Seek help.