Why He Isn't Texting Back: 5 Reasons Why Your Guy Might Be Ghosting You

Updated on May 29, 2018
thehands profile image

Jorge's relationship advice is based on observation: He's seen many—including himself—seduced and hurt by love.

Is he not texting you back? There could be a number of things keeping him off his phone.
Is he not texting you back? There could be a number of things keeping him off his phone.

Why He Isn't Texting Back

Did you send a text to a guy and are wondering why he isn't texting back?

Well, since every circumstance is different, there is no one, specific thing that we can point to that signals the undeniable truth of the situation. He could be actively avoiding you or he simply may have not noticed your texts. He could be too nervous to reply or he might simply not be that into you.

There could be many reasons, so take a look at the list below to narrow down why he might be ghosting you and not texting you back:

1) He Forgot That You Texted Him

The simplest reason is that he simply forgot you texted him. This has probably happened to you, right? You looked at your phone while you were distracted, quickly read a text, and then forgot to reply?

Other people do this a lot, too. It might be disappointing for you and this might make you think that you're not a huge priority to him, but it could simply be that he's absent-minded. Some people are not glued to their cell phones all day and barely noticed when someone texts them. He could be this type of person.

In a case like this, the best thing to do is just to wait it out until you feel an appropriate amount of time has passed, and then simply text him again. You might also just try calling him. It's easy to ignore a text, but a ringing phone tends to get more attention.

Having said that, don't blow up his phone! Send a reasonable amount of communication and when he gets back to you, he'll get back to you.

He could just be busy with work and hasn't noticed your text.
He could just be busy with work and hasn't noticed your text.

2) He's Busy With His Life

Have a little bit of patience. People often get caught up in their lives and may not have time to pencil somebody else in. Again, you might think to yourself, "Does this mean I'm not important to him?"

The answer may be yes...or it could be no. If you're fairly new to his life, then it's only natural that you're not a priority yet. For example, if you've only been on one or two dates, don't expect him to drop everything just to be around you. In fact, getting too overly-obsessed with you could even be a bad sign. Some space is good.

On the other hand, if he really doesn't seem that enthusiastic about you even when you meet in person, then consider that he might be trying to let you down easy by ghosting you. After all, if someone isn't that excited to be with you, then it's probably not worth dating them. Which brings us to...

3) He Doesn't Like You That Much

Sorry. It's certainly possible that he isn't making room in his life for you because he simply isn't that into you. Nothing personal!

Usually, when we like people--especially in the beginning of a relationship, before we've grown too comfortable--we're extra accommodating and careful to answer people's messages. He could just be aloof and have his head in the clouds, but there's only so much aloofness that a person can have when they like you.

You may think to yourself that he should have the courage to tell you straight up if he isn't into you, but rarely can people muster up the guts. It's easier just to turn into a ghost.

If he has a consistent pattern of ignoring you, then next time you actually get a hold of him, asking him straight up: does he really like you, or are things just sort of "meh"? He might be too embarrassed to tell you bluntly, but you should be able to tell a lot from his body language. If he doesn't like you that much, don't waste your time!

How Long He Hasn't Texted Back

How long has it been since he ignored your text?

See results

4) Technical Difficulties

Naturally, the issue could also be really mundane. Maybe his phone broke and it isn't receiving texts. Maybe his phone died and he hasn't realized it, so you'll have to wait until he charges it again. Maybe he uses ones of those old flip phones that can't read emojis, and you sent him a bunch of smiley faces and eggplants, but they just look like little blank squares to him, so he doesn't know how to respond.

If it's just been a one-time thing and he usually texts you back right away, then it could very easily be a technical problem. In fact, this is probably one of the more likely scenarios.

So before you start imagining worse things in your head, focus on something else--spend some time with a friend, watch a movie, go outside--and patiently wait for him to get back to you.

Try calling him and see what's up.
Try calling him and see what's up.

5) He's Mad at You / Avoiding You Deliberately

There's also a remote possibility that he is deliberately avoiding you because he's mad at you or experiencing some other kind of negative emotion towards you. Obviously, if this is the case, you should have some kind of inkling as to why.

If he's just mad at you for seemingly no reason, then there's a definite communication problem and you either need to address that next time you see him, or else you need to rethink the relationship altogether.

He could also be trying to play head games with you by making you sweat a little while you wait for him to text you back. Some people are manipulative like this. If you suspect that this might be the case, then there's little else to do but let things hang. He'll text you back on his own eventually. Of course, when he does, you might not even want him to anymore. It's best not to give someone the time of day if they insist on playing games. Again, don't waste your time.

Is It Worth It Waiting For Him to Text You Back?

One thing that you might want to ask yourself through all of this is: is all of this worth it? Think of all of the hours you've spent agonizing over why he isn't texting you back. What productive things could you have done with your life instead? You might have even been able to spend all that time and energy on someone who actually likes you enough to respond by a reasonable time!

If you know that he means well and is probably just too busy to answer, then don't get mad. Everyone has days like those. Give him some space and try to to suffocate him too much, or you may find that he'll avoid texting you even more.

Again, it really just comes down to the long-term pattern of behavior. Is he usually attentive? Is he usually distracted? Try to compare the situation to what you know of him to gauge what's "normal" for him. If you decide that he's probably just being a jerk, well, then maybe you should drop him.

Why You Think He Isn't Texting Back

Why do you think he is ignoring your texts?

See results

Questions & Answers

    © 2018 Jorge Vamos

    Comments

      0 of 8192 characters used
      Post Comment

      • dashingscorpio profile image

        dashingscorpio 

        2 months ago

        He could be he's driving Or maybe he's not all that into texting!

        One theory is we text those we don't really want to (talk) to.

      • thehands profile imageAUTHOR

        Jorge Vamos 

        2 months ago

        To DredCuan:

        Absolutely, this applies to both men and women. If someone seems disinterested...they probably are!

      • dredcuan profile image

        Dred Cuan 

        2 months ago from California

        I can totally agree with all your points here. However, I think this can be applicable for guys and girls who are into relationships. Whatever the reason of a person ghosting to his or her partner, only brings to one question, are they really into the relationship? Or they just have the relationship because they just like to have a partner or just to get any benefits from their partner. So at the end, its both parties decision if they can continue their relationship or not.

      working

      This website uses cookies

      As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, pairedlife.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

      For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://pairedlife.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

      Show Details
      Necessary
      HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
      LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
      Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
      AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
      HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
      HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
      Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
      CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
      Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
      Features
      Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
      Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
      Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
      Marketing
      Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
      Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
      Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
      Statistics
      Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
      ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
      Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)