I confess. I have been a nagging female, but I've learned since. Me nagging a man didn't do anything but disrupt my household and cut my relationship short. I only react when I have proof of disloyalty and even then I react differently than most. I quietly end the relationship and completely sever all ties. There's no "I forgive you." There's also no "let's talk this out." Why should I, when I know for sure there's no coming back from it? Stop wasting each other's time. This will only lead to nagging, arguing and fighting about the past
He Is Not Your Child
He is not your child so why are you constantly telling him what to do? Ladies the way you talk to these men that you claim to love is downright disrespectful and uncalled for. I don't care what he has done or didn't do, he doesn't deserve that. If he did something so bad that causes you to belittle and demean him, then why are you with him? If you're talking to your man the way that you do, you can't possibly love him. Words hurt and love isn't supposed to hurt. When talking to your man, 'a real man' who does what he's supposed to do, then only respect and adoration is supposed to be shown. If you have to treat your man as if he's your child, then you don't need him.
Stop Being a B***h
You don't like his mother, you can't stand his sister and you hate all of his friends. You're not afraid to let any of them know that you hate them either. You disliking his family and friends, will make them start distancing themselves from the both of you. Your man will still have a relationship with these people, with or without you.
The only difference is that you're forcing him to sneak to see his family and friends without you. Now they don't like you, so that gives them a reason to find him a better suitor that will treat him better than you are. Family can get messy too. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.
Nagging Leads to Infidelity
You keep nagging that man and he's going to go out and find a less naggy woman. Those nagging questions of infidelity will cause a man to cheat. He's already being accused of cheating so why not cheat? It may sound like a stupid reason to cheat but this does happen. I have a family member that always nagged her man. She would go in on this man every chance she got. Everything that came out her mouth was negative towards this man. He cheated on her every chance he got.
He cheated because she was already saying he was cheating so he did. Her level of nagging was already at it's highest when he was being faithful, how bad could it get if he actually did it. She didn't leave him and he didn't leave her and the nagging continues on to this day. As well as his constant cheating. Nagging a person does not keep them in line, it pushes them away. It also makes for a stressful environment for all of the people who have to deal with the two of you.
Men Stop Getting With These Nagging Women
Is it really worth it? Only you can answer this question. You're a grown man and she's acting as if she's your Mother. Life is too short to constantly be told that everything you're doing is not right. Men if you continue to stay with a nagging woman, then you're enabling that type of behavior. Why should she change if you're alright with it? To be with someone who questions your every move, can get very frustrating. Yelling insults and screaming demeaning things to you can't make you feel like a man. So why even get involved with that type of woman anyway? Maybe you like to be told what to do? If that's your answer then you have Mommy issues and you need therapy to deal with that.
10 Tips to Stop the Nagging
I know it's hard to stop nagging cold turkey, but you can't possibly keep this up. Your home is suppose to be your sanctuary to all who dwells there. You come in with your fussing, arguing and fighting and it takes away the sanctity within your household and automatically turns your home into a chaotic mess. I have come up with 10 tips to stop the nagging in it's tracks. Once you put these tips in motion, just sit back and watch the change within your relationship. It won't be easy, but try it for a week just to see how it will go.
1. This first tip is the most important one. You need to pray, meditate and just become one with yourself. You have to be spiritualy aware of the chaos that you are causing within your home and your relationship. All of that fussing and fighting is giving the Devil a VIP invite into your home. Once the Devil is in your home it's hard to get him out. That's why you should say a prayer over your home, open your door and escort the Devil right on out. I'm not a religious person, but I do believe in God and bad spirits. Sometimes that's all it is that's causing you to fight within yourself about what another person is doing. All you can do is hope that the person you love is representing you well. Loosen the leash.
2. Love yourself first! If you don't love yourself, how are you going to love somebody else? Your relationship and your home should breath love not hate. If your relationship is filled with hate and anger all of the time, then that relationship is not worth saving. Do like Elsa and let it go!
3. Your man is late getting home. When he comes in the house. Greet him with a smile and a kiss. Ask him how was his day? He may quickly try to explain his whereabouts, because he knows that's what you're going to ask him. Inform him that it's all good and what's important is that he's home safe. Your body will fight you on this, but stay strong. Give it to the good Lord and if he was out there doing something he wasn't supposed to be doing then let that sit with him. It will all come out sooner or later, but in the meantime Be Happy!
4. Your man's phone rings while the two of you are watching a movie. Pause the movie and tell him to take the call while you go refill the refreshments. Don't question who it was. You care, but don't let him know. He may just tell you who it was. You may not believe him, but don't ask for his phone in order to make sure it was who he said it was. It's going to be hard, but you have to have some trust in your man. You also have to give him some form of privacy. Everybody needs a life outside of their relationship, otherwise what's the purpose of living? Especially if you're only going to encompass yourself with one person. Where's the joy in that?
5. Let down your gaurd. Life is constantly changing and if your gaurd is always up, you will continue to be stuck in that same old dusty gaurd shack. The same one you've always been in because, you won't allow anyone else in. Throw a party and invite his closest friends and family. Show them that you're not such a bitch after all. Put your true personality on display and watch the reception. Everyone is not really out to get you and break up your relationship. A bitchy disposition gets a bitchy reciprocation. Drop the bitchiness.
6. Enjoy your relationship. Stop trying to look for something wrong. Just take the time to appreciate each other. Life is too short to worry about the future and too complicated to worry about the past. Do things that make the both of you happy now, so that you can have happy memories later.
7. Breath. Whenever the unforeseen comes up just take a deep breath. Your man wants to go out with the fellas, take a deep breath and tell him to enjoy himself. Your man comes home late after work. Breath and don't question his whereabouts. You'll be surprised how he'll offer up information on where he's been. Your man didn't take the trash out like you asked him. Instead he's lying in bed sleeping like a baby. Breath and take the trash out yourself and don't say nothing. When he gets up looking for the overflowing garbage can, he finds a nice note instead. "Hey Babe, you were sleeping so good, I took the trash out for you. Get your rest. I'll make dinner when I get home. Love You!" Sit back and watch his reaction. If you change, then so will he. Just like Sir Isaac Newton said, "For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction." You just may come home to a beautiful bouquet of fresh flowers and a wonderfully made dinner.
8. Stay active. Keep yourself busy with friends and family. You do this so that you're not at home worried about what he's doing when the two of you are not together. An idle mind is the devil's playground, so stay busy.
9. Have date nights. These can put sparks back in your relationship. Having date nights allows the two of you to dress up and hit the town like you did in the beginning of your relationship. You will be surprised how a night out can broaden your relationship.
10. This last one may come as a surprise, but it should really be common sense. Communicate! Wow right? There are couples who've been together for years and they don't communicate. They talk and do fun things together, but they don't communicate. The misconception is that talking and communicating is the same thing. Wrong! One has a deeper meaning than the other. To talk is to engage in speech. To communicate is to share or exchange information, views and ideas. I can talk to a dog, but the way we communicate is by actions. We need both in order to understand each other. If you're in a relationship where you spend more time arguing than actually communicating then this is a real problem that needs to get fixed immediately. You have to be open to receiving and understanding what the other person has to say. Close your mouth, open your ears and Listen!
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
Yusef Osman on May 06, 2019:
Hi, to some extent I was just so down and tired about my husband sudden change in attitude, he is always on to his phone. I was so much bothered and I contacted
Ladyashelyhackworld at g mail, she helped me spy and gave me access to his cell which I got his messages and mails also the long deleted messages.
Pearl on April 18, 2018:
This works only when your husband is faithful. If you have caught him cheating on you, then all these habits can be very fraustrating.
tarkishat (author) on March 07, 2017:
Great Charity! I'm sure your boyfriend will be ecstatic.
charity chogo on March 07, 2017:
i will take that home. am a naggy girlfriend, guess i'll change. thankie
tarkishat (author) on March 05, 2017:
Thanks for reading truthseeker! Somebody has to let them know that nagging can destroy a relationship.
thruthseeker on March 05, 2017:
thanks for telling this uncomfortable truth! It really needed to be said, because this thing is ruining so many relationship and people still think nagging is helping their problems.
tarkishat (author) on March 02, 2017:
Thanks dashingscorpio! You're so right.
dashingscorpio from Chicago on March 01, 2017:
Unfortunately most people model behavior they grew up with or observed. If a guy saw his father being nagged than he (expects) to be nagged by women and if a woman saw her mother nag then she believes that's how to treat men. From their point of view it's "the norm".
In other instances people take ill advice from friends and family.
Sometimes if a person finds someone extremely attractive they will put up with crap they otherwise would not have especially if the sex is great.
There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships: We either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. Accept them (as is) or move on. The choice is up to us!
Compatibility trumps compromise.
Life is too short to be trying to change water into wine.
The goal is to find someone who (already is) what you want in a mate.
Like attracts like and opposites attract divorce attorneys!
"Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."
- Oscar Wilde
Your mate is supposed to be supportive of you.
If someone is constantly nagging and complaining it means (you) are not "the one" for them and vice versa. Thankfully there are (7 Billion) more people!