10 Signs Your Guy Is Losing Interest in You

Updated on September 8, 2015
How to tell if your guy is no longer interested in you.
How to tell if your guy is no longer interested in you. | Source

Introduction

Every relationship has that honeymoon period. It can last anywhere from a few weeks to a few months. Once the intense cuteness has faded, usually things have settled to the point you are comfortable and secure with one another. This does not mean your man has gone off of you; it's just another stage in your relationship.

But when things seem to take a sour turn, who's to blame? Has he lost interest in you, or is it just a normal road bump you two have to work out?

Here are 10 signs your boyfriend, partner, husband, or potential boyfriend is going off of you.

1. From 100 to a Flat Nothing

He goes from full-on gushing Niagara Falls to a leaky tap in a public toilet.

If your man in question was talking to you a lot, calling, texting, trying to make conversation, and wanting to see you, then suddenly slows down, you should be worried. Men are very abrupt when they lose interest. Going from lots of talking to no response isn't an accident. He's sending you a sign.

I have seen men use this trick when they want rid of someone but not entirely. It means he's not really interested, but he's not burning bridges so that you're still there for a lonely night. If he suddenly texts you a bit out of the blue one Friday night after several days or weeks of not talking, he hasn't been busy. He's been playing the field, and now that there's nobody else around, he wants to hook up.

2. Plans? What Plans?

He stops planning dates—or even planning when he'll see you next.

When you first start dating someone, it's all excitement. You want to meet them for a drink, go and see a film, get some dinner, or even just hang out at home together. So if he begins to lose interest in making plans, then it may be a sign that he's losing interest in you. Men are keen creatures, and when they are interested in a woman, they will actively pursue seeing her again. If he's starting to lose interest in you, his plans will become vague. He'll start saying he wants to do something "another day" and cancelling dates at the last minute (or just not showing up).

If you have no idea when you will see him next and it's been a few days, he's not trying to see you. And if that's the case, it might be time for you to pull away.

3. He Becomes Vague

He never gives you details.

This also ties in with the above statement. When a man starts become vague about plans, his texts become less enthusiastic, and you go longer periods of time with less communication from his end, it's likely he is losing interest.

If you're having a hard time learning his plans, only to find out he's been going out with his friends or family, then it's time to move on from this man. He clearly isn't making time for you when he has plenty of it.

4. The Awkward Talk Never Comes

He'd rather not put a label on things because he's not looking for the relationship to progress.

An early sign that he is losing interest is when he doesn't seem to want to put a label on anything. This is an especially strong warning if you've been going out for a few weeks and things seem to be going well.

We all have to face that awkward talk to establish just how we feel and whether we're in a relationship. If it has been a few weeks and he's doing the following, then it's a sign he's not actually looking for a relationship with you:

  • Not taking the step of asking you to become official
  • Not mentioning anything that even hints that he wants something more serious
  • Making vague excuses about friends or wanting to be sure you're right for him, yet he continues to pursue you intimately and treat you like a girlfriend

It's time to stop dating him. He's just stringing you along until the next person.

5. He Stops Making an Effort

He went from a romantic to a slob who's never around.

Whether he's letting his personal appearance and hygiene slide, the quality of your dates is becoming disappointing, or his behaviour is below par, if he's making much less effort than he was initially, it's probably because he's losing interest. If your first date blew you off your feet, your second date was beautifully romantic, your third was cute and fun, your fourth was wild and crazy, and then suddenly he's taking you to a fast food restaurant or swinging by for an hour to hit on you, he's not all that interested.

When a man is interested he will make an effort. He will want to impress the woman and get to know her, and to do so, he will want to look his best to make sure she thinks he's a catch. A woman will do the same thing when she's interested in a guy. So if you notice his effort is diminishing, it might be time to call off the dates.

6. Rudeness

He ignores you and sometimes even shows contempt.

When a nice, polite, sweet guy who seems genuinely interested in you begins acting rude, you shouldn't let it slide. By rude, I mean:

  • He ignores you
  • He makes offensive jokes
  • He seems to be sneering at things you're saying

Any of these things can happen in person, on the phone, or by text.

Think about it: How many times have you gone out with someone that you lost interest in and began to feel annoyed with? Perhaps you were intentionally rude to some guy just so he would leave you alone? Men use this same trick on women.

If he's saying things in an attempt to provoke a response (e.g.: cracking woman jokes, mocking you, making rude blunt statements, being short with you, swearing inappropriately or making you feel bad in any way), you should avoid him.

You don't have to tolerate anything from this guy, and you don't owe him anything. If he's being rude, he's likely not very interested in you. If he were, he would do his best to be a kind, impressive human being.

7. "Meet My Friend"

He starts using the word "friends" around you more often.

When you notice he's referring to you as a "friend," saying you're a good friend, that you have a good friendship, or that he's glad you're friends, he may be trying to gently let you down.

So take a hint. He just wants to be friends, and he doesn't see you as anything more. To be fair, this is one of the kinder ways for him to do so.

If he's talking about friends and friendship, he doesn't see you as girlfriend material now or in the near future.

8. He Hits on You Excessively

He avoids the relationship talk but is always talking seductively.

By "hitting," I don't mean beating you; I mean he's trying to get lucky with you. The more winks he sends, the more seductive he tries to be, and the more persistent he is with intimacy, the less likely it is that he views you as a girlfriend. He probably sees you more as a friend with benefits or even a random girl to hook up with.

If you've tried discussing your relationship, hanging out without getting intimate, and going on normal dates, but he still pursues you like that do not sleep with him. He is not going to respect your body. Instead, he will use you, leave you, and make you feel bad about yourself. You don't deserve someone that is only after you for some fun. You deserve someone who has a real interest in being with you.

9. A Lack of Phone Calls

He doesn't call, and he doesn't want you to.

A giveaway to the fact your man is losing interest is when he doesn't call you. Men who are interested will phone you, talk to you, and actually speak to you on the phone for a period of time. If you offer to call him and he says he's busy or tells you to call tomorrow (which never happens), it's a sign he doesn't want to pursue an active ongoing conversation with you.

You wouldn't normally phone your friends as much as you would a lover, so avoiding phone calls may just mean that he considers you a friend.

Or it's possible he'd rather you didn't phone because it's much harder to ignore a call than a text or an online chat. This ties in with being vague and not making plans—if you don't call, it's easier for him to distance himself.

You should be wary even if he never really called you from the beginning. Look at it this way: You're interested and would like to call him up, right? So he should feel the same way if he's into you.

10. What's My Name?

He doesn't call you by your first name in conversation.

If he texts you and calls you "sexy," "gorgeous," "stunner," "hun," "honey," "babe," "baby," "boo," or (the worst one of all) "bae," he's not taking you very seriously. This counts for texts, online chats, face-to-face conversations, emails, and phone calls. If he never uses your first name, then he may not even really remember it.

Usually, these kind of men are looking for a fling and trying to butter you up by calling you something that compliments your looks. Sometimes, they're even trying the same thing on multiple girls at once.

When you talk to him in person, I'm sure you call him by his first name. Within certain contexts, you probably add his name to the end of texts. If he's not doing this to you, and instead the only thing he calls you is a pet name, then it's likely he's not very interested in you.

Guys Explain Their Top Breakup Signs

The Closing Statement

Don't get hung up on men that aren't interested in you. Every minute of time you waste on a man, trying to make him like you, could be time you spend on things that make you happy and one day spend with your future husband. Get out there, and meet some good men.

If one stops calling, then it's not the end of the world. Stop contacting him, and if he doesn't bother to contact you again, then you've ended it on a good note and he can't say anything bad about you.

Treating bad men badly by hassling them, pressuring them, stalking them on the Internet, or being too persistent will lead them to tell other men that you're no good. You don't want a guy who didn't deserve you to lead other men to pass judgement on you before they get to know you.

Move on and find someone worth your time!

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • profile image

      Yoyo 

      5 weeks ago

      Im a man and i completly agree with these points, it happends instinctivly girls. Better fix ur game :))

    • profile image

      Hello Rascal Men 

      2 months ago

      It's you guy who keep playing roller coaster on women. One thing give hope another turn cold. What the hell are you guy doing. All of you use penis to live and not Brain.

    • profile image

      4 months ago

      Women, stop forcing relationships on men. Stop coercing men into getting into relationships, stop being clingy for you feel lonely and miserable. It's unfair to see men as resources and objects. If he doesn't feel, he doesn't feel. He's isn't an asshole for not having feelings for you.

    • profile image

      Sam 

      4 months ago

      I'm in love but he doesn't love me back he says were better off as good friends.

    • profile image

      Sam 

      4 months ago

      I'm in love with this guy but he keeps sayig that we are good friends, and he doesn't want our friendship to be ruined or possibly end. I even asked him to be my boyfriend and he said sorry i'm trying to get over my ex and i'm like you dumped her though, huh. So then I blew up on him and said i'm literally pouring my heart out on you and I have liked you since I met you and I just didn't think that was the right time to tell you since you were dating someone and he just says I'm really sorry, but I don't want our frienship to end in anyway possible. So i asked him to go with me as friends to a dance thing and he said sorry i'm not going and i'm like why and he said cause we are good friends and I want to stay that way.

      Is it just me or did I find the wrong guy to fall in love with, please help me understand more about my situation and help me understand how I can get him to fall in love or at least like me. He is the nicest and sweetest guy ever. Please someone help me understand what to do.

    • profile image

      paula roberts 

      7 months ago

      ive moved on lol

    • profile image

      Pop 

      14 months ago

      Thanks...its helpful

    • profile image

      Mya 

      15 months ago

      Girls don't read this, it just makes you worry more and sometime the reason is right out in the open and you just have to talk to him about it and not assume thing's.

    • profile image

      Rosset 

      19 months ago

      You are so right Jackie you go man!!! :)

    • profile image

      Lorena8 

      20 months ago

      Thank you so much for this article i found it very comforting as I was angry and in a confused state of mind when I found it. Ok my story whoever is reading this might be quick to judge me but whatever you think is your opinion. I meet this guy on dating website so chatted for few weeks then decided to meet in real life. Also he happens to be local, which is fantastic cuz I wasn't very keen with a long distance relationship.

      As soon as we met our connection was like magic it wasn't very long before we started kissing each other. We spent 10 straight together, we went from pub to pub had drinks even went for dinner. He offered to drive me home and I obliged. When I got to my place he offer to walk me to the door, I thought that was really sweet of him.

      When we got to the door we just stood there and carried on chatting to each other, it was quite late, around midnight. then I said oh I would've  invited you in but my flat is very messy as I haven't had the time to tidy it up since I got back from holidays. He said oh no that's not a problem,  you should see how messy my house is first before talk about yours, we laugh about it before I said him ok come in then.

      We sat on couch cuddled up to and watch few films and Kissd each, he seem very nice and I liked him straight away. Around 4am we where both tired so he suggested we should to go bed so I lead to my bedroom and we went to be. He just couldn't keep he's hand off my body. I felt unsure if I wanted to have sex with him. I told him on but I wasn't firm about it.

      So went on and had sex that more. I regretted it straight away. He left in the late morning and i didn't hear from him the whole day, so I texted in the evening to ask if hi got home ok. He reply yes thanks. My heart sunk. I kinda of expect him to at least ask me how I'm doing but he didn't. That's was the first alarm bell. Since then hes been very cold towards me. I even told him that he has suddenly become cold and he replied and said, I'm busy that all. I knew straight that his no longer interest in me. But after reading this article I kind of understood his drill a lot better. I have now promised myself that this is going to be the first and last time that I will ever  have sex on a first date. Not because is bad but because of the way it made me feel. I feel bad and I blame myself for being so easy and stupid.

    • profile image

      Sabri'A 

      20 months ago

      Pretty accurate smh

    • profile image

      Jackie 

      22 months ago

      Y do the girls always have to full fill a guys needs but a guy cant do that or at least treat his girl the right way maybe the girl wont be a bitch or if the guys stop there bullshit maybe women will treat a guy the right way it goes both ways

    • profile image

      dadsd@gmail.com 

      23 months ago

      quit reading this shit. All it does is make woman more insecure than they are. If you sense your BF is losing interest it is more than likely that YOU are doing something wrong. NOT treating him right or fuffilling his needs. FInd out what they are by communicating and then taking action. End of story.

    • profile image

      dee 

      3 years ago

      Intresting

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, pairedlife.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://pairedlife.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)