17 Signs Your Guy Is Losing Interest in You
Every relationship has that honeymoon period. It can last anywhere from a few weeks to a few months. Once the intense cuteness has faded, usually things have settled to the point you are comfortable and secure with one another. This does not mean your man no longer feels strongly about you; it's just another stage in your relationship.
But when things seem to take a sour turn, who's to blame? Has he lost interest in you, or is it just a normal road bump you two have to work out?
There are some clear indicators that your man is losing interest in you and is actively trying to break things off without directly saying it.
Signs He Is Losing Interest
Here are 17 clear signs that your man is losing interest in you rapidly and that he is looking to break things off.
- His attention towards you has dramatically dropped.
- He stops making plans and going on dates with you.
- He becomes vague.
- He dodges questions about the future.
- He stops trying to be romantic.
- He starts acting rude.
- He thinks of you as a friend.
- He hits on you all the time.
- Lack of phone calls and texts.
- He stops calling you by your first name.
- There's no sex.
- There's only sex.
- He stops caring about his appearance.
- He keeps making excuses.
- You're no longer a priority.
- He starts picking fights.
- He flirts with other girls in front of you.
1. His Attention Towards You Has Dramatically Dropped
If your man in question was talking to you a lot, calling, texting, trying to make conversation, and wanting to see you, then suddenly slows down, you should be worried. Men are very abrupt when they lose interest. Going from lots of talking to no response isn't an accident. He's sending you a sign.
I have seen men use this trick when they want rid of someone but not entirely. It means he's not really interested, but he's not burning bridges so that you're still there for a lonely night. If he suddenly texts you a bit out of the blue one Friday night after several days or weeks of not talking, he hasn't been busy. He's been playing the field, and now that there's nobody else around, he wants to hook up.
2. He Stops Making Plans and Going on Dates With You
When you first start dating someone, it's all excitement. You want to meet them for a drink, go and see a film, get some dinner, or even just hang out at home together. So if he begins to lose interest in making plans, then it may be a sign that he's losing interest in you. Men are keen creatures, and when they are interested in a woman, they will actively pursue seeing her again. If he's starting to lose interest in you, his plans will become vague. He'll start saying he wants to do something "another day" and cancelling dates at the last minute (or just not showing up).
If you have no idea when you will see him next and it's been a few days, he's not trying to see you. And if that's the case, it might be time for you to pull away.
3. He Becomes Vague
This also ties in with the above statement. When a man starts become vague about plans, his texts become less enthusiastic, and you go longer periods of time with less communication from his end, it's likely he is losing interest.
If you're having a hard time learning his plans, only to find out he's been going out with his friends or family, then it's time to move on from this man. He clearly isn't making time for you when he has plenty of it.
4. He Dodges Questions About Your Relationship and Your Future
An early sign that he is losing interest is when he doesn't seem to want to put a label on anything. This is an especially strong warning if you've been going out for a few weeks and things seem to be going well.
We all have to face that awkward talk to establish just how we feel and whether we're in a relationship. If it has been a few weeks and he's doing the following, then it's a sign he's not actually looking for a relationship with you:
- Not taking the step of asking you to become official
- Not mentioning anything that even hints that he wants something more serious
- Making vague excuses about friends or wanting to be sure you're right for him, yet he continues to pursue you intimately and treat you like a girlfriend
It's time to stop dating him. He's just stringing you along until the next person.
5. He Stops Making an Effort to Be Romantic
Whether he's letting his personal appearance and hygiene slide, the quality of your dates is becoming disappointing, or his behaviour is below par, if he's making much less effort than he was initially, it's probably because he's losing interest. If your first date blew you off your feet, your second date was beautifully romantic, your third was cute and fun, your fourth was wild and crazy, and then suddenly he's taking you to a fast food restaurant or swinging by for an hour to hit on you, he's not all that interested.
When a man is interested he will make an effort. He will want to impress the woman and get to know her, and to do so, he will want to look his best to make sure she thinks he's a catch. A woman will do the same thing when she's interested in a guy. So if you notice his effort is diminishing, it might be time to call off the dates.
6. He Starts Acting Rude
He ignores you and sometimes even shows contempt.
When a nice, polite, sweet guy who seems genuinely interested in you begins acting rude, you shouldn't let it slide. By rude, I mean:
- He ignores you.
- He makes offensive jokes.
- He seems to be sneering at things you're saying.
Any of these things can happen in person, on the phone, or by text.
Think about it: How many times have you gone out with someone that you lost interest in and began to feel annoyed with? Perhaps you were intentionally rude to some guy just so he would leave you alone? Men use this same trick on women.
If he's saying things in an attempt to provoke a response (e.g.: cracking woman jokes, mocking you, making rude blunt statements, being short with you, swearing inappropriately or making you feel bad in any way), you should avoid him.
You don't have to tolerate anything from this guy, and you don't owe him anything. If he's being rude, he's likely not very interested in you. If he were, he would do his best to be a kind, impressive human being.
7. He Starts Thinking of You as a Friend
He starts using the word "friends" around you more often.
When you notice he's referring to you as a "friend," saying you're a good friend, that you have a good friendship, or that he's glad you're friends, he may be trying to gently let you down.
So take a hint. He just wants to be friends, and he doesn't see you as anything more. To be fair, this is one of the kinder ways for him to do so.
If he's talking about friends and friendship, he doesn't see you as girlfriend material now or in the near future.
8. He Hits on You Excessively
He avoids the relationship talk but is always talking seductively.
By "hitting," I don't mean beating you; I mean he's trying to get lucky with you. The more winks he sends, the more seductive he tries to be, and the more persistent he is with intimacy, the less likely it is that he views you as a girlfriend. He probably sees you more as a friend with benefits or even a random girl to hook up with.
If you've tried discussing your relationship, hanging out without getting intimate, and going on normal dates, but he still pursues you like that do not sleep with him. He is not going to respect your body. Instead, he will use you, leave you, and make you feel bad about yourself. You don't deserve someone that is only after you for some fun. You deserve someone who has a real interest in being with you.
9. A Lack of Phone Calls
A giveaway to the fact your man is losing interest is when he doesn't call you. Men who are interested will phone you, talk to you, and actually speak to you on the phone for a period of time. If you offer to call him and he says he's busy or tells you to call tomorrow (which never happens), it's a sign he doesn't want to pursue an active ongoing conversation with you.
You wouldn't normally phone your friends as much as you would a lover, so avoiding phone calls may just mean that he considers you a friend.
Or it's possible he'd rather you didn't phone because it's much harder to ignore a call than a text or an online chat. This ties in with being vague and not making plans—if you don't call, it's easier for him to distance himself.
You should be wary even if he never really called you from the beginning. Look at it this way: You're interested and would like to call him up, right? So he should feel the same way if he's into you.
10. He Stops Calling You by Your First Name
He doesn't call you by your first name in conversation.
If he texts you and calls you "sexy," "gorgeous," "stunner," "hun," "honey," "babe," "baby," "boo," or (the worst one of all) "bae," he's not taking you very seriously. This counts for texts, online chats, face-to-face conversations, emails, and phone calls. If he never uses your first name, then he may not even really remember it.
Usually, these kind of men are looking for a fling and trying to butter you up by calling you something that compliments your looks. Sometimes, they're even trying the same thing on multiple girls at once.
When you talk to him in person, I'm sure you call him by his first name. Within certain contexts, you probably add his name to the end of texts. If he's not doing this to you, and instead the only thing he calls you is a pet name, then it's likely he's not very interested in you.
11. There's No Sex
If he stops regularly getting intimate with you that can be a huge sign that his interest is dropping. Men tend to crave physical intimacy, and the fact that it has stopped means he may also be seeing someone else on the side.
As his attraction towards you drops and he stops spending regular time with you, he will be less likely to initiate anything intimate, and he may just drop it altogether.
12. There's Only Sex
On the flip side, if he constantly gets frisky with you and that is the only thing the two of you do, it can be a sign that his interest in you is waning. He may still be attracted to you, but he is only interested in using you for his own sexual gratification.
He will start seeing you less and less but pressure you into having sex with him when the two of you do spend time together.
13. He Stops Caring About His Appearance
As he loses interest, he will start dressing worse and letting his hygiene around you slip. Instead of trying to look good for you, he will do the opposite. He no longer feels like you are important enough for him to warrant dressing well. This may also be his attempt to get you to lose interest in him so he can justify breaking it off.
14. He Keeps Making Excuses
He will keep making up reasons and excuses for why the two of you cannot hang out, and it will become pretty apparent that he is not as busy as he says he is. No one is so busy that they completely stop having time for someone else. If this behavior continues for a while, it is a strong indication that he is no longer interested in you like he was before.
As his desire to spend time with you decreases, his list of excuses will increase. When you ask him to do something during the weekend, he will complain that he is super busy or super tired from the week and just wants to spend some time alone. While this may be believable for a few weeks, after that, it's just a sign that he would rather do something else than spend time with you.
15. You're No Longer a Priority
His general attitude toward you will indicate that you are not a priority for him anymore. As he continues to spend less and less time with you, he will start to prioritize other activities over you. Instead of trying to make plans that fit into your schedule, he will begin to ignore your needs and make you a low priority.
He wants to send a clear sign that you no longer matter to him and this is a clear indication of that fact.
16. He Starts Picking Fights
When the two of you together he will look for things to fight with you about, trying to put the blame on you and make you feel bad. This tactic is used on his end as justification to break it off with you. He will try to make things difficult for you so that you will no longer want to spend time with him since he is too scared to just be upfront with you and tell you he wants to see other people.
By arguing with you and making you think of him in a hostile light, he is sending the message that he no longer cares about you and that he wants you out of his life. If he has started acting this way, then it is best to try to break things off as it will make your life much less stressful.
17. He Flirts With Other Girls in Front of You
If he starts flirting with other women in front of you, it is a big sign that he no longer values your relationship. The fact that he would cross that line when he knows better is bad, and it shows that he is actively trying to make you mad. He is hoping that you will get the message and leave him, so he does not have to have that awkward conversation with you about breaking up.
Guys Explain Their Top Breakup Signs
The Closing Statement
Don't get hung up on men that aren't interested in you. Every minute of time you waste on a man, trying to make him like you, could be time you spend on things that make you happy and one day spend with your future husband. Get out there, and meet some good men.
If one stops calling, then it's not the end of the world. Stop contacting him, and if he doesn't bother to contact you again, then you've ended it on a good note and he can't say anything bad about you.
Treating bad men badly by hassling them, pressuring them, stalking them on the Internet, or being too persistent will lead them to tell other men that you're no good. You don't want a guy who didn't deserve you to lead other men to pass judgement on you before they get to know you.
Move on and find someone worth your time!
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