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How to Pull Off the Greatest Revenge on the Person That Did You Wrong

I've been betrayed multiple times in my life, and each time I have felt the desire to seek revenge and retribution.

Revenge is payback; a way of settling the score and administering retribution. It can be something trivial and fleeting, or it can consume you and last many years. Sometimes revenge is in the form of a prank, is actually quite funny, and no harm is done by it. Sometimes revenge takes a completely different form with nothing funny about it, harm being done, and criminal activity involved.

Of all the types of revenge, the affairs of the heart appear to cause the greatest need for revenge. That being the case, that is what I'm focusing on here even though work-related revenge is what made me want to write this.

When we are wronged by someone we care about, our reaction is to seek vengeance and get payback. However, it goes deeper than that, as feelings of anger and spitefulness are a natural response to betrayal.

How Far Is Too Far?

Keep in mind that you have to be incredibly careful if you decide to get revenge on someone as many of the things you want to do to them are illegal and could get you in trouble. Destroying their property or harassing them are two options that cross that line. In just about every case, taking your vengeance to that level is a bridge too far and will cause more problems than solutions.

Retaliation

Also, keep in mind that if you do something terrible to someone else they may seek to get revenge against you, continuing a cycle of vengeance. They may see to raise the stakes even high and do something even worse to you.

How to Get Revenge

There are plenty of methods for exacting some sweet revenge on someone that has wronged you. The most important thing to consider is who they are as a person and what will devastate them the most. Personalizing your revenge will give you the best opportunity to get back at that person.

Ways to Get Revenge

  • Let the world know about their wrongdoing: Do something public that shames and humiliates them. You can take out a billboard or make a sign or something that is widely visible.
  • Destroy something they love: Find a treasured item that you know is important to them and destroy it in front of them.
  • Ignore them: If you are still in contact with this person, start ignoring them and pay them no attention.
  • Refuse to help them in their time of need: Again, this depends on if you are still on good terms with the person who wronged you. If you are and they call upon you in their time of need, you can give them the cold shoulder and let them down.
  • Show them up: Get in better shape, dress better, and start living a better life than the other person. Be sure to let them know how great your life is and all of the amazing things you are doing.
  • Make them look bad: If you have the chance, you can do something in public to embarrass them and demean them.
Public humiliation as revenge.

Public humiliation as revenge.

How to Get Revenge on Your Ex

Breakups are difficult, and emotions tend to run high, so you may feel the need to get back at your ex. Here are some methods for getting revenge on your ex.

  • Get into great shape: Start working out and watching your weight so you can look like the best possible version of yourself. Developing a toned and good-looking body will make your ex jealous and show them what they are missing out on.
  • Dress well: This goes hand in hand with getting in great shape. Go out and buy some nice clothes that fit your body and make you look good. You would be surprised at how much of a difference there is when you were clothes that fit your style/aesthetic.
  • Give them mixed signals: Depending on how your relationship ended, this may not be possible, but if you're in the position to act hot and cold towards them then do so.
  • Publicly humiliate them: You can call your ex out on social media or do something more public that will show the world how terrible of a person they are.
how-to-obtain-the-greatest-revenge-on-the-person-that-did-you-wrong

How to Get Revenge on Someone Who Cheated on You

If your significant other cheated on you, that is a massive breach of trust and if getting back at them for betraying you is something you want to do, here are some creative ideas.

Take out an ad in the newspaper: Pay for an advertisement in the local paper calling out your significant other for cheating on you.

Stuff your living space with frozen fish: If you two live together you can get a bunch of frozen fish or shrimp and stuff it in a hard to find spot. As the fish thaws out and rots, it will leave a horrendous smell that will make it impossible to live there.

Swap numbers in their phone: If you have the ability to, go into their phone and switch the numbers in their contacts. That way when they text the person they are cheating on you with, they will instead be texting someone else, like their mother or boss!

Destroy something they value: You should know some of their favorite possessions, so pick one to destroy.

how-to-obtain-the-greatest-revenge-on-the-person-that-did-you-wrong

Why Do We Want Revenge

Wanting to get revenge on someone who wronged you is a natural response for anyone to have. But why do we feel this way? Are feelings of anger and spitefulness natural even in people who are not prone to anger or bitterness?

We are hardwired to develop social bonds with other people, and when we are betrayed by those people and that trust is broken, our reaction is to want to make them suffer. When it comes to most revenge plots, this happens to be the case. Rarely do we ever think about getting back at a stranger who has wronged us; it is typically when we are betrayed by someone we care about that we feel the need to get revenge.

Initially, the idea of getting revenge seems pleasurable to us, that if we make the other person suffer the way they made us suffer that our suffering will decrease. And while vengeance may feel great at the moment, it actually prolongs the feelings of anger and resentment.

Understanding the Consequences of Revenge

As I have already talked about, you have to understand the consequences and ramifications of getting revenge on someone. What are you trying to accomplish and what will be the outcome? If you get your revenge is that somehow going to make the pain and anger go away, or will it amplify it?

In many cases, you will realize that ultimately getting revenge on someone that wronged you will not make you feel any better and that the best approach is to forget about the whole incident or forgive the person who wronged you.

Doing something that causes significant damage to the other person or their property will only make things worse. While it may seem like the best option while in the throes of passion and anger, once those raw emotions dissipate over time, you will realize there is a better option for exacting your revenge, which is forgiveness.

The Best Revenge Is Living Well

As trite as it is going to sound, the best revenge is to forgive, live well, and succeed. The immediate satisfaction is not there; I will definitely grant you that. You know the one I'm talking about. The one you dream about, the one you fantasize about when you are thinking about which revenge you are going to use, and you are picturing the reaction, the stun on their smug face. But the satisfaction is fleeting and will only come back and bite you in the end (either financially or emotionally).

Many people say that "living well is the best revenge," and it is true: if you focus on living your best life that will yield the best outcome for you. While it may be hard to do that at first, continuing to pursue vengeance will only lead to more anger and frustration.

Spite Is Not Satisfying

When you do something spiteful, you might as well go to the other person in tears and lay down on the ground in front of them and let them walk all over you. You are letting them know that you are devastated and that they have an emotional hold on you.

So we have established that the spiteful revenge, although briefly satisfying, is definitely not the best approach. By carrying the need for revenge, you are keeping yourself from moving on and healing.

How to Forgive Someone Who Has Wronged You

I think the only way to move on from this type of situation is to forgive. Talk about the hardest thing in the world! It is easy to forgive people you like, but to forgive someone who has betrayed you deeply and doesn't even care is much harder. Until you forgive them, you will not be able to move on. Instead, you will be trapped in a cycle of anger and resentment.

Letting Go

One of the hardest things to do is to let go of your hate and other negative emotions. However, in order to move on with your life, you have to purge yourself of those feelings. Giving into those negative emotions will not make your situation any better. Focusing on staying positive and making improvements in your life is the approach you have to take.

Now, the forgiving part is not instant. It is not something that you can just wake up one day and say okay, I forgive them, all the anger and resentment is gone. You make the decision that way, but you have to remind yourself that you have forgiven them when the hard feelings swell up. Keep telling yourself that you forgive them, pray to forgive them, and eventually you will realize that you mean it and that you really do forgive them.

The next part is easier. Once you can move past what happened, live well and succeed. The reason this is easier is that you are not carrying the baggage of anger, which is extremely heavy baggage. Now, everyone's definition of living well and succeeding is different. Mine is being happy; enjoying life. No person should count on another person for happiness. Be happy with yourself and who you are. The rest is just topping on the cake. It is much better to be happy by yourself than be miserable with someone else, trust me on this one.

When you seek revenge, you dig two graves.

— Confucius

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2008 New Reflection

Comments

Ben Dover on June 12, 2020:

Never looking for trouble, just don't cross me. You cross a line, like meddle in my personal life using false information. Boomerang.

Anony on May 31, 2020:

I realize.. I just want to be happy

Andy on May 17, 2020:

My wife of 18 years was having an affair with one of my freinds, she left me for him and took my 4kids with her she had his kid and got me arrested and i spent 6 months in jail (was released without charge ) when i got out i found out that they had split up,he'd had his fun and was sick of her she begged me back so i forgave her and we got ack together, ive just found out that theh've been seeing each other again, i want to smash him in but i know ill get locked up again, need tips please

Harquinn on April 26, 2020:

This made me do a prank text that said I’m watching u on master revenge

Annomynous on April 08, 2020:

I think this is a great example of how to get revenge.Or too let it go!

Will Simmons on March 22, 2020:

And another thing i think its down right comical that people will say dont take revenge because it will cause only heartache .....well where the hell were you when the other person started it all? You cross my line you do so at your own risk dont make that first move and we all good. I put it in your hands to decide it

Will simmons on March 22, 2020:

All this " revenge will only cause you heartache " thats all personal opinion ...people get revenge every day on those who wronged them ....its all about how you go about it ....now certainly if your going to break the law to do it thats never going to be good for you . i have been done wrong and i have been happy while driving my ex wife nuts for last 10 years ....its critical. That you maintain happiness thru it all ... .

Cindy on March 01, 2020:

Do nothing at all not jod what friend they sit you up make you do thing they dont make it right ok for them smoke with thete kids dont do nothing theygot pay for it

Lynn on January 29, 2020:

My ex best friend (We'll call her M) was perfectly fine, accept M would be rude if she didn't get her way. In Junior High M would always come over/sleep over.

My family even let her stay a few days. We even woke up at 6 am on the weekends to take her to practice. Well, I have 2 other friends. (A and L) I introduced A and L to her when we were in Elementary. We all were best friends. Frequently hung out. Went to each-other's houses, went out. Suddenly... Freshman year of High school.

I get a text in class from an unknown number saying I was 'talking behind my friend's back.' This specific friend, she was there since 2nd grade. (I'll call her Y) I would never hurt Y or talk behind Y's back, we were sisters basically.

I taught Y so much, as did she with me. M had something to do with this. Word got around. Her boyfriend (E) and her did this just to be rude. You see, E doesn't like me just because I was LGBT+ at the time/questioning myself.

Like I said, word got around, people started to ignore me and push me around. My other friends all sided with M and E. As did A and L. (Get this: E is Y's BROTHER).

Later on, we're doing a group project... L, M, Y, me and another friend. We were sent at a certain spot outside of class. We were recording for a video project.

I wasn't doing stuff right/ and got insecure about it so I stood off to the side planning what I can do to help. M sees me, thinks I'm slacking off and cusses me out, yells at me in the hallway in front of everyone. M, Y and my other friend don't do anything. At all. Just stand there watching her scream at me, cussing. She said "It's not my fault if you fail' and I was trying to explain that I didn't know what to do but she just threw me back down and said 'It isn't my fault, you should know' at this point, we're near the band hall an an instructor comes out and says for her to lower her voice, watch her attitude, etc. He goes back inside, she keeps yelling and cussing at me, saying 'I'm going through stuff'. She used that as an excuse to get attention. Then she cries and runs off. L runs after her and that's that. The others are just quiet. I go to the bathroom and just break down. Because, you know. My best friend at the time just cussed me out, why was she being so mean?

I moved away for a bit, came back to the school... Fresh start.

Sophomore year comes. Everything is good for a few weeks. Then another friend (A) texts me a screenshot of an Instagram story accusing me/ telling me to "Stop looking at me" and it had a picture of a guy that was M's friend. Like bro, I never even noticed he was there because he moved to a college school program. I never seen him since 8th grade. So I do whats right and go to the office and talk to the concealer and explain M and I are on bad terms and I know if will FOR SURE turn into Cyber bullying if nothing is done. My parents back me up on this because they know how she is to. She had meltdowns at my house and got mad, overall she is very very un-greatful. She never says thank you, puts me down in front of my parents. They've witnessed her ways. The school calls down the two, J and M (J is the guy that they both accused me of 'looking at' him, which i'm like I probably did because I haven't seen him for a long time and it's like, hey, he's back).

Everything is done, M ignores me completely. My school still doesn't like me due to rumors she also put out. Ex friends hate me, people don't talk to me. Oh well.

Devon on January 25, 2020:

Last time i decide to took revenge on someone i ended up with 4 years of solitary confinement

EllEmDee2000 on December 30, 2019:

Really? Live well? Great maybe if they did something insignificant like cheat on you or or steal your life savings. But with complete and utter systematic patient long term destruction of a persons life, accomplishments, relationships,, family, children, career, health, mental health and all around soul raping sociopath....I am thinking something more than a pedicure, Zumba, and Kumbaya at Camp Forgiveness.Something legal and within the boundaries of the law, but something that will sting.

Kn on December 27, 2019:

he was my bestfriend for a short time and then he started acting with me as if he is more than a friend after a long time we loved each other

And i told him he told me that he loves me too and acts in the same way

We met and he wanted to hug me and do these things

He looks at me the way someone truly loves the other but every time we talked about our relationship he rejects me and tells me that he needs time

after 2 weeks i noticed that he is in a relationship all this time

Then i faced him

He left and i blocked him help ! I wanna know what to do

Irina on December 21, 2019:

I know a guy who get marred for money and they used a close friend she didn't have a green card , all his family was involved , they took the money , and being greedy 2 months before the interview he ask her to sign and take a student loan of 200k for medical school, she refused . After she spend 50k on them they need more , he find a Indonesian girl now, in August they get married she need grand card too definitely , actually he find her 5 months before to dump the first one and they make an agreement she suppose to help him to get more money from the first one. They will have the interview soon for the grand card , she's fuking him for free , she is too poor to give him money . The girl which was dump in the fiery place her attorney advised her to live the country, which she did.... I'm really sorry for her and she ask me to public her weeding picture. to everybody because all his friend think they are the best and good people, a Sunday church Samaritan. they destroy her live completely. Having her mother sick she was the only one to support financial her parents. Know she is suffering , become anorexic and she tried to take her on life twice. They was her best friends that what she thinks, but in the real life they just use her for 9 years . How to call people like this ?

holly on December 11, 2019:

i lived with a man and all he did was lie about everything i even think he was still married im still trying to find out its been eight months i just cant get over how used he made me feel believe me i dont miss him at all just feel angry all his lies how he told me he has to get away from his ex wife she lives three thousand miles away she is very needy and i quess so is he he still takes care of her financially their kids are young aldults i get kids with her but to hide and act like she is your wife is very odd i think

Saraswati barnawal on December 10, 2019:

Hi guys,

I just want also tell my story. So you all won’t mistake this scam for a hacker. Seriously guys, y’all need to be careful with who you hire. I reached out to PANSPY VIA GMAILCOM and told him i need to remotely gain access to my ex husband’s device. He collected payment for days now and didnt deliver. He also stopped responding to my emails. I have left him for my maker and he will get what’s coming to him. All he wants is your money as he doesn’t care what you’re going through. Be careful out there guys

Uzi on October 13, 2019:

Awsm bro nd nice tricks

Diana Zocfic on August 20, 2019:

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mad af on June 10, 2019:

Nedra Ryan taylor snipes is a clout chaser

a liar

a master manipulator

a pillow princess

best actor ever look her up yall

Susu on June 05, 2019:

My ex left me like a piece of garbage ….only after he left me I knew he was married! I have horrible feeling of how he could do this to both of us... his wife and me... how I can get my dignity back

Karma on March 23, 2019:

I revenged my cheating dog by posting his cheating history with his name on “ Busted Cheaters “ it will generate top google search if anyone look for his name and it’s never leaving internet and then I screenshot it and send it to his ex wife who he also cheated on and she didn’t even know , so now she can look it up cheaters website herself and get an input of his dirty doing until this day ! Hopefully it prevents someone other girl getting hurt by this dirty community dick .

Heather Cross on March 19, 2019:

A friend said to me once that it was obvious I didn't like playing games. To this I proudly agreed. My friend continues "that's only because you don't have any". Lucky for me I had my big girl panties on and I do love the honestly. I appreciate between us. If the same was said without me present would be no friend of mine.

If you are like me then you wish not to harm or be harmed physically', spiritually, or socially. Nor do you care to further damage via revenge.

Sparing myself and my dignity I scrolled past the gist of the article only because there was no other way to the comments box except for literally strait down.

Krystal Sly on March 04, 2019:

In mine and my children's time of desperate need i turned to my mother for help she said she would be happy to help i gave my rights to my older three babies to her and less than 10months later she put them up for adoption i had no home no job no high school diploma couldn't get a job we needed her there was nothing I could do to save my sweet babies i begged her to give me 6 months to a year to get on my feet she claimed she and my stepfather were retiring and wanted to travel as soon as my babies were gone forever she began raising my little brothers kid. I haven't seen my kids in almost 12 years once I found them i was told she said i was on drugs and that is why they were taken which was a hugh lie i want her to hurt long and hard like me what could I do to seek the suffering she deserves?

Lisa on February 05, 2019:

Great article. When I found out an ex was cheating on me, I planned things carefully with the advice of a friend. I called him to ask him to meet, as if to kiss and make up, but when he arrived at the place, I was there with a group of friends (all female) and we gave him a special gift - a cake in a box which we’d made for him, with ‘You’re Dumped’ written in icing on the top. His face was priceless when he opened and saw it, he was completely humiliated. Simply making a ceremony of dumping him, in front of others, is a great way to get revenge.

molly on January 28, 2019:

We live in cold northeast.. It is very cold again right now and

last year about this time I drove to the apartment of a girl I wanted revenge on and poured 5 gallons of water into her gas tank. wish I could have been there when fuel line freeze up left her stranded. Then good thing is she will never know she just didn't get a bad batch of gas from a station... Unless she reads this.....

Mike richter on December 29, 2018:

Revenge is like a sword with two blades and no handle,it cuts on both ends,he who weilds it will be injured also!I. Its one of lifes biggest tests better to leave it go! I know been there done that!

Lisa on November 11, 2018:

This sure its good

But how many ex will you do this to

and how many will stay and watch you do it because they offended you

Miranda on November 08, 2018:

This has NOT helped me in the least. I am still burning after almost three years now. My family were seriously ill at the time and I got NO help at all from my mother's relations. When my family died, they gatecrashed the funerals and were very scornful and laughing in the cemetery.

Karlos on October 24, 2018:

I have this guy I liked so much and it seemed he also liked me but he never said it. I was tired of waiting and so I just told him I had feelings which he didn’t reply me. As days gone by, he came back and we started meeting and we French kiss every time we meet but he still didn’t tell me he liked me. I did something which he told me he doesn’t like and he called me and humiliated me saying all sort of rubbish that he even has a girlfriend (which he never told me). And that I’ve caused problem between him and his girlfriend. He said after what I did he doesn’t think he can continue talking with me again. It’s been 2 months now we haven’t spoken or gotten in touch. I really miss him though I don’t want us to be in a relationship anymore. Can I message him and clear our misunderstanding and just be normal friends to have peace of mind or should I just let him be?

Me on October 15, 2018:

I thought i was gonna get some good tips for getting people back for taking advantage of my nice personality..... instead i feel worse about myself..... :)

Jenny on October 14, 2018:

I wanted to say thank you (heart icon) I am justifiably very angry for being taken advantage of, to the tune of $750. I read your article to get some ideas to exact my revenge. Your article cheered me up, just reading about some despicable revenges. You made me laugh so hard, and well, I can't feel anger when I am busy chuckling. Once again, thank you for restoring my temper.

Truth Really Is on September 13, 2018:

Speaking of cheating which my filthy whore Ex wife of mine after being married for 15 years cheated on me, and i was the very faithful one in the relationship which it still meant nothing to her. Whores do really destroy many of us good innocent men for no reason at all, and this is why MGTOW is the real way to go today.

louis will on September 02, 2018:

Some people are suspecting their partners of cheating but they don't have any evidence All u need is to contact MARKFAGERTECH AT GMAIL DOT COM they will give u access to his or her phone without any traces within 9 hours and u can get to see all their lies and people they chat with directly from your phone. This will help u know if his really cheating or not This what I did when I started doubting my boyfriend and Anonymoxteam was the one who helped me

Rania on July 20, 2018:

My partner suffers from bipolar he keeps finding excuses to kick me out

He has a ex sister in law that always in the middlemy partner refuses to talk to me or reconcile now rummer says he is with her as a couple he still refuses to face me

What do i do?

Mark Hutch on June 10, 2018:

It's been 5 months I'm healing tryin to move on. She had a new fb before we broke up. My problem is why does she keep trying to have me jumped on and beat up? Ive moved 3 times in 6 months and she's found me at every 1 of the complexes I moved to.

daysgood1 on June 09, 2018:

This article is a waste of time. The title leads one to believe he/she will be reading about an effective revenge strategy, but instead it goes into a long diatribe about forgiveness. One very important rule for successfully writing any kind of blog or story is this, give the reader what you promise in your title. "Tricking" your reader, instead of delivering what your title promises, is very offputting the reader. After reading, they feel they wasted time.

Andy on May 24, 2018:

Because of trauma of scapegoating I got into a run and hide pattern. Scared like a little bunny rabbit I watched as the perpetrators somehow got taken down by life. I never believed in forgiveness and running but I did live on without revenge the best I could. The perpetrators lives fell apart and their egos became increasing fragile and started to get depression . Eventually nothing stood in my way. I am awestruck at how things would wind up with the coward getting the winning hand. Life is strange

Natalie on May 18, 2018:

Just got ripped off by a so called mate who I'm always helping. I want to do something back but not break the law. How can I do it?

Will Henry on May 10, 2018:

My employee at work lied to police that I made a threat and because his father was a retired deputy, I went to prison ! I had absolutely no criminal record but his lie was more powerful than my truth ! I lost my home, my job and my family because he was used to getting his way ! My son was homeless and died on the street and I witnessed the dark side of justice !

Punalei Kauakahi on April 06, 2018:

I am livid bc my kids father broke my car window and door. This is the 2nd time he did it and i want to get him back. After reading this i feel God wanted me to read it. I typed in Google whats the best revenge to do to my baby daddy for breaking my window anx this pop up. I read everything and get it. For me my understanding is to leave him alone and work on forgiving. Hes been a dick to me for years. Every level of abuse. This is the last straw. Today im taking a stand for me. I love me. And it wont be over night it will take me time to forgive and not get back at him. I am very capable of moving forward and not dealing with assholes that mean me no good. After today i get the massage God is showing me. Hes not the one for me.

adeleliss on April 03, 2018:

hi guys,

i wanna use this opportunity to reach out to anyone out there facing infidelities doubts in their relationship, i was suspecting my husband cause his been acting up lately, but i have no visible evidence to proof his infidelities until i was introduced to this guy michackersolutionatgmailcom by a colleague at work.

i now have a hold of my husband and we resolved the whole issue after enough evidence from Mich from his phone.

you can contact him any time you need to know the truth about your relationship status if your suspecting anything snoopy…you can get everything like the text, call logs, fb, whastap and other activities and location.

tell him Kim referred you he will surely help you outkk

Mepa on February 22, 2018:

Its been 523 days my wife betrayed me, though its very pain full to think over which keeps me thinking day n night but i m still together for the kids.. So i have a quotions to you friends that how to get out of the sickness.

jonjon83 on December 30, 2017:

why not send them 1000 texts? its definitely made me feel better in the past C: It goes off for a long time and is anonymous

https://www.roboshout.com

Sunday on December 29, 2017:

I have read the article. Am interested in talking to you

RADIO 74 on October 23, 2017:

We think in too short of a time span. Life is short... 60, 70, maybe a hundred years... as compared with eternity... billions of eons of time, just to begin with. Here we may suffer pain for a few short years. By God's grace, it's manageable. Our certain hope is in the perfect New World to come filled with perfectly loving, sinless people (hopefully ME too!), after Christ transforms us at His Second Coming.

Meanwhile, in the short term, better to take a few bad raps, "forgive", "forget", but then avoid getting stabbed again.

Paul recommends in Romans 12:19: ...avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.

Ultimately, God WILL have the final word. There WILL be a final judgement. He will equalize all scores, right all wrongs. The just shall be exonerated and the unjust destroyed. In the New Earth that God is planning, sin will never rise again. Bank on it!

GoldenChild on October 18, 2017:

LET GO & LET GOD

Faith on October 16, 2017:

I just found out my close friend is talking shit about me behind my back with my ex boyfriend... should I revenge or let it go?

Revenge makes me feel better on October 02, 2017:

My own sister stabbed me in the back and then tells everyone I stopped talking to her. Ya think? She always plays the innocent, and people always believe her! So, ya, I'm done with her. It's been 10 years since we spoke , she has never tried to apologize to me, just keeps saying she did nothing wrong......I still am looking for a good revenge plan to fuck her over.

Bunk on August 26, 2017:

The story with the woman and children? Was one a daughter? I have a 16 year old daughter. She watched her father "woo" the other woman while he was still married to her mother. You know, rumours all around but he lied to her and her brother about the relationship, constantly denying that is was going on. The other woman? Married, 2 kids at the time, now of course, divorced. She and her kids very recently living with their Dad. He doesn't have time to spend with them unless they agree to see her. The kids have reached out to spend time with ONLY him... but nope, they MUST get used to seeing him with her. I (the Mother) have absolutely no interest in being friends with people who lie, cheat and steal in general, let alone if they do it to me. When asked by my daughter why I am not "friends" I have very truthfully told her that should some day, the same pain come her way (God forbid) that her significant other pairs up with a friend of hers in deceit and she is lost in pain, that I tell her "press on, move forward and don't forget to try to be friends!" What a bunch of BUNK. Relationships, parent/child, husband/wife of simply friend/friend, relies on truth. Such serious violations of truth are nothing short of denying someone's reality for years at a time and that is emotional abuse. Seriously people, this is the problem with society who have no respect for the sanctity of marriage and traditional family and it's causing a mess for a lot of 'kids' out there. It's not the sadness of the betrayed partner... the sadness wanes, but is always there. And yes, a small amount of revenge - say, exposing those lies? Do it.

Dakota on August 18, 2017:

Okay, so there is this guy who I still really like. We had a thing going and he even kissed me. (I'm in middle school by the way) But then he said that we were getting to serious and that we wouldn't work. I was so upset. I still am upset because of how much he means to me. But, I want to make him see what he is missing, what he could of had if he didn't break my heart... If anyone has any advice please comment and I will know it's for me if you say my name. Thanks

Trinity on August 12, 2017:

Why do you people post all sorts of backward crap about revenge? If the lady had taken revenge, instead to just complaining to her children for 30 years, her heart would have felt better and she would have not died in such a deplorable way. Forgiveness ONLY helps BAD people... cheaters and abusers. This reverse psychology is sickening to see being posted all over the web. so, surface deep and fake. why are there so many wars that people are not standing up to end if FORGIVENESS was such a real and optimum choice for many? People can live HAPPY lives without forgiving anyone for anything. Learning to move-on and understanding the evil or wrong that was done to you does not have to be restricted to FORGIVING.... one only need to understand that the world is unfair and we have to move forward inspite of different hurts etc. the word FORGIVENESS should be banned because it's definitely being overused and is being used to VICTIMIZE victims and forcing them to bear ALL responsibility for the perpetrator.

Diana on August 08, 2017:

You talk about cheating husbands. What about if he is a narcissist. Someone who conned you for thousands of dollars and the walked out on you. Told you that he used you the whole time. There is so much anger. How can you forgive? Revenge is a better option

Carmen on August 01, 2017:

Thank you so much. This helped a lot

Don wood on July 20, 2017:

Nobody,messes with me! Or I can use the hologram technology to fool people! Ann Marie is clever!

Mndebo on July 12, 2017:

Very interesting and makes sense. However, how would you make something like that work when an ex-girlfiend of 9 months refuses to give you back over $10,000 of personal items, tools and most importantly family items of my deceased parents. Thing is, no cheating, no drugs, no alcohol, no physical or mental abuse, no police involved domestic calls. Etc. I only know of one way to get back at her. But unfortunately I'm not that kind of person. But also can't move on. I know I will never be in a relationship again.

Barb on June 04, 2017:

When someone bullies to the point of resigning from a job revenge is at the top of the list. I will pray for the strength to move on.

callie on May 31, 2017:

In 2000 my husbands revenge for making him obey a court order directing that he work the millinial holiday while I went to Bavaria with his parents and friends, was when we landed on his 45th birthday, we wanted to just ho to a breakfast that morning with the offer of getting him a 11 day makeup time for the Holiday he had the right to take off under his uaw contract with his seniority if 24 years allowing seniority of less than ten years habe the time off, His father found out he was going to defy the order issued years before by a friend on the bench and had my husband jailed and escorted to work from the 23 of December 1999 to the second of January 2000.

When we flew in we were. going to suggest he take 11 days personal time off, talk to his Union who was already upset that the local court got in the way of seniority rights with my husband. They were uoset that he had been escorted into work when several younger seniority should have worked.

So out of guilt for having a judge make him work everyday from may 28th 1985 to his 45th birthday of January the 5th 2000, we bought him a high tech clock. It was programed with the things we saw and took pictures of and had music to accompany the changing scenes. I felt at least he could see what the new century was, A Hope of peace and forgivness for the life he had been forced to live, I was tired of crying all the time under his yelling about no sex or time off since our wedding in 1982. I came back to offer an olive branch of peace and talk to people about letting him up. I was going to suggest we leave the Christmas tree up for a few days Exchange our gifts abt like it was the holiday down week he was made to work through then obtain a real vacation time latter that spring or summer as an apology and start the new century with a clean slate for everyone

In the back of the suburban he had a very nicely wrapped box for me. He said it was a gift of what I was worth to him go agead open it, he had gathered the leavings of dogs in it. it had to be put in a dumpster before we hit the road. His parents arrived to a small crowd in front of their house. He had found a wagon wgeel in an old barn, he concreted it standing up with rawhide wrist ties and hung a bull whip on it, The sign on it invited the community to come see the uppity slave get flogged to remind him he was owned and not free. His aunt took his crying mother away. I felt it was a hateful thing he did all because he was not getting his way.

Its been another seventeen years of people hurt and him making us cry gaining his rights, not in peace and negotiation, every interference. has drawn his instant combat trained retaliation. In 2009 ne decided me and his father did not have the right to cancel another vacation and take his passport, We were going to let TSA give it back to him after we were on the way to catch the Orient Express.

He dislocated my shoulder and tried to strangle his father to death when he discovered he was not going. We felt that he had worked 28 years with six surgery recovery days off in 2001, what was 7 more months or 210 nore says to wait for the one we we4re going to surprise him with on January the 2nd 2010, Just let us give the boy that had a white shotgun wedding that week to his 4 month pregnant girlfriend. We felt he could understand that the boy had 32 years less seniority he should have the time.

My husband hated us for it and he despised the younger man, bad enough that when he went back to work two weeks latter he was greeted by the committeeman , his foreman and security and marched out of the plant terminated to stop a wildcat strike potentialy putting over 100000 men on the street without pay. The union felt the young man earned the firing and my husband sais it was not his down zipper that got the girl pregnant. He hated me forcing my bi polar illness to keep him from a divorce and never offering a chance at a family to keep him from doing things like this. He really did not care what was being offered any longer, It was his way only! When we got back he had me put in front of a judge for the theft of his passport and acting as false agent in the canceling of his reservations. I had to serve 2 months in county for trying to do the right thing, His father served the same and we both got probation for several more years. My husband was at work on October 24. I had only talked to him a few minutes since may. The day after labor day, and that was on break on his job. At 8 am that sunday morning I was awakened by a phone call Telling me to get dressed and be out front in 15 minutes. My husbands sister appeared with her mother. I was told the local hospital was sending my husband to a spine surgon, I was thinking vroken back or accident on the job. We arrived to see my husband already sedated on his stomach with the medical people all in containment suits and we watched from behind glass as they wheeled him into a 21 hour surgery of which he had to be revived 2 times. The PA came out after ten hours and bought hospital services to tell us that they would help with funeral arangments, that the board of health was insisting on a creamation after MRSA was discovered in his spine.

He came out still alive after 21 hours and left in a coma, the doctor said his spine looked like swiss chess and the cord was partially severed and crushed. He woke up 2 days latter and tried standing on his own and went straight to the floor. We had talked to an imunologists the day before and he told us that my husband had let depression stop his. immune system that weas the reason MRSA was where it was at. We felt that he would not have been depressed if he could have just looked at the good his time did. Or get him to understand that even though he had earned his rights, and should have had his say about the way he took them, Sometimes for societys sake those rights had to be not used. Just let everyone have their way and take what was left over. Like I said in 2001 he would not baxk down even with the promise to do things his way after that time, He;s been on a 16 year rampage against his father, me, and nearly everyone we knew taking his rights back. Hestarted hurting people for any form of interfering in what he wanted in time off or job positioning. When he relearned to use his ghands and walk he came home with no intension of letting any thing shake out over a period of time. Let me and everyone else get used to his not having nerve impulse below the top of his legs. He had accused us of stealing three decades of his life through legal chicanery force and blackmail.

The evening he came home I was justr finishing getting ready for a dinner event I had been invited to that evening with his parents and his fathers best friend. My husband was sarcastic saying he had not been out in the evening in 31 years where were we going?

I realy did not know how to handle the situation, So broke out crying telling him I had promised his father that evening and it was to late to change the plans, I was offering a 100 to pick a place to meet in 4 hours so we could figure out what could be allowed now in baby steps when he went off yelling. Who did we think we were to allow him anything. First I was going to keep the hundreds of promises that had been made to him, before I kept any more to any one else. I knew exactly what he was saying that he was not going to let me to continue to blackmail him with the promise of a sex life. a vacation he wanted. This time he was not negotiating with me he was ordering me just like we had him for 31 years. I took for the door and he reached out and shredded my outfit I was going to wear that evening.

He backed me into the living room telling me what his time, sweat, sometimes blood and pain gave me, and he said what had he recieved in return. he said no time off, no holidays. he had not had anything except to look forward to his lot was over 100 degree temps in the plant 12 hours a day, And I spent what he made. He only spent what was needed to work in. He reminded me that I had gone on ten overseas vacations since 1987 to his none.

GetItGoing on May 07, 2017:

"the best revenge is to forgive, live well and succeed"

This is the cliched, old, and tired advice that is completely false.

As with many falsehoods promoted in western culture, this one particularly is bad as it promotes being passive and letting others cause you grief, harm, and disrespect with no consequences.

As with many things, the key is balance - revenge that doesn't harm yourself but brings consequences to those who would do you harm in this world.

As the saying goes, "Others will treat you as you allow them to", so is it that often times revenge is well-deserved and can have a positive influence on those who are otherwise a bad influence in our world.

Simply rolling over and doing nothing is NOT the answer.

Bahle on February 24, 2017:

I really loved it, it's not easy to forgive but if you believe in God step aside so he can take over.......

Mohammed on January 11, 2017:

Nice Article about revenge BUT I STILL WANT REVENGE AND WILL STOP AT NOTHING TILL I GET IT

Veronica on January 07, 2017:

Against my principles I fell in love with a man who was married. I let him borrow $30,000 to help him save his restaurant. I listened to his sob stories of his home life and what he had lost. This had been going on for almost 4 years. I thought I meant something to him. I never expected him to leave his wife or we would have a life together but I never thought he was using me all this time either. I should have known better. Now I'm sitting here missing him because we had so much fun together and angry because I have to face the fact that I was used.

Dj Bass Alizi on December 15, 2016:

Good Article.

Don't waste your time on revenge. Have fun in life. Just let them go and move on.

jj on December 14, 2016:

Revenge on someone who beat me up should have not messed with HA! HA! HA! HA!

RAGHAv on December 04, 2016:

I herted so much when my best friend tried to beat me with their friends. but he is my best friend( i trust him so much but he betrayed me) i want to take revenge but i can not concentrate on it that what am i going to do!

sometimes i thinks that i have to take revenge from him but my other side of mind in which the memories which we send together stops me to take revenge from him?

what to do plz plz heip me??????????

JohnONeill2016 on October 02, 2016:

thats all well and good but there is a thing called JUSTICE - which is the way i see justified revenge.. it also depends on your situation in life - its much easier to forgive and move on if you have family and friends to share your story with and go home to... but what if you are on your own... as i say its much better to release the resentment once and for all than to bottle it for years trying to forgive some evil person for the evil they committed. im not saying go out and kill someone but i am saying a person should be made to feel humiliated and ashamed for the wrongs they committed otherwsie theyll be laughing and proud thinking they have the victory. lets just say humbling someone never did any harm now did it. if we follow your logic we just let any wrongs that happen to us be forgotten and forgive the perpetrator, easier said than done! and something fundamentally unjust about that. its almost like saying if someone commits a crime just ignore it, except thats the point, they may not have committed a crime in the eyes of the "law" but the act they did was technically "EVIL" so some form of justice must prevail. Otherwise we may all go round thinking we can treat people how we please with no recourse!

lil mama on September 24, 2016:

let me just use this opportunity to thank lord. azeez for the great help he has rendered me for helping me remove generational curse of bad luck

Vaughn on September 18, 2016:

I like making them feel as though I will be exacting revenge and keep them guessing as to when it's going to come. It never does.

simay on September 08, 2016:

i love this hub

Essenio on August 05, 2016:

Why is it that most people are pushing for rationalizations?

It is a rationalization the act of "taking the higher moral ground". This way of dealing with feeling revengeful isn't satisfying, and it is an excuse to yet fail to acknowledge defeat. It is like saying, yeah, they think they beat me, but they have no idea how morally superior i am --while in all respects no one really cares about superior morality, and the only person who believes so it the person unable to exact revenge.

There are situations in which revenge is unwarranted. But let's look at the facts. I live in the US. I clearly remember 9/11, as I would hope most of the ones who were alive and capable of thought would. The US, as a reaction --revenge-- started the war on terror.

Another instance of pain and simple (maybe not so simple) revenge is the capital punishment. Revenge in the capital punishment instance provides closure.

And the list goes on and on.

It is true, it may start a cycle that never ends. But revenge is a reality of our lives. It is a basic need for humans. The whole legal system is there to provide occasion for revenge.

Therefore, there is nothing wrong with dragging someone to court, and expect some sort of closure. The key to is is that revenge should be commiserate to the offense received, and not exacted by a person taking the law in his/her own hands, and certainly much better than hiding behind some bogus "magical thinking" such as the higher moral ground, karma, or any variations of such b@$$s*&$.

Good Luck.

Robert on July 28, 2016:

My wife cheated on me with my best friend and eventually left me. After several months of searching the internet and reading different things, this was the first thing that was actually helpful! I thank you from the bottom of my heart and wish you all the best!

KOOLADE52 on July 23, 2016:

A lot of this is about for giving in fact one of the quote are "when you seek revenge you dig 2 graves" but I want revenge on someone for trying to kill me

Rc on October 01, 2015:

I'm gonna get mine!!!

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Bryan Khan on July 23, 2015:

My email address is bryankhan9@gmail.com

Bryan Khan on July 23, 2015:

I would like to thank you for the write up. I have been through what I would call a 'hell-like' experience. It all began with this relationship and I was naive to give up on my life, family and career and move to another state to be with my so called partner.

Its difficult to believe what the person could put me through. Mental, emotional and physical abuse. I was humiliated more than a dozen times but just took it silently. The person assaulted me and even cheated on me. I am trying to forgive but its taking a toll on me.

Would appreciate your prayer and support. I would think about getting even but then wheres the difference between the two of us. I don't feel like wasting my time plotting and planning for my partners downfall. I know his personality will cause that to happen soon.

I need the strength to forgive and carry this I don't care attitude towards the person. Would appreciate any help and advice from your end.

MARY on June 12, 2015:

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Candy on April 27, 2015:

I recently found myself reliving a deed that was done to me, that made me feel used and worthless. I turned to the internet on how to exact revenge as this event wouldn't leave my mind. I came across this and to my denial at first, I now believe is what I need to do. I want to move forward and stop replaying what has been done, and so I will forgive the person who caused me pain, because ultimately I believe someone will do unto him what he did to me because karma is a bitch. :) Thank you for this article!

bobaluche on March 23, 2015:

After reading these posts my take is that you can try to spray paint black evil to look clean and white but in the big picture you have to breathe deeply and learn to love yourself. The comment about digging 2 graves--pretty deep, no pun intended. My problem is a female bureaucrat doing her best to make me feel as bad as she feels .Trying to smear me professionally.I plan on switching gears and let the cosmic gears churn to their resonance and not become the monster. Love me. I can be me for free.

Lucy on August 29, 2014:

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Scarlette on June 26, 2014:

I've had so much anger towards my sister in law , niece and nephew for months . I have told many family secrets as revenge but I still get no satisfaction it doesn't seem to phase them which makes me more mad and determined they just have no feelings at all. My nephew was slowly stealing from my mom who has no money , he disrespected my home when I trusted him and his girlfriend, his mom cheated on my brother and tried to hook up with my husband, my niece will get in your face and screams and cuss u out she has no respect . They all act like they are all that. My niece screws a new bf every month then got knocked up then aborted it and that was the cing on the cake. I started out fir revenge but nothing gets to them it's like they have no feelings. Even though they know my daughter wants a baby but has had 2 failed ivf attempts and can't conceive my niece aborted her baby becsuse it I te referred with her social life. We would have gladly adopted. I do t know how to forgive. Our family is split forever.

john on June 18, 2014:

wow forgiveness, thank you for wasting my time

Angela Joseph from Florida on May 29, 2014:

Great hub! It's so true, two wrongs never make a right. Anyone bent on seeking revenge is also making him/herself more unhappy. Love the scriptural references at the end.

Westy on May 19, 2014:

Amazing article

pimpernell from belgium (seaside Flandres) on February 20, 2014:

Didn't have the time to read all the above but although talking wrevenge is holding on to negative feelings for far too long and seldom has a longterm effect, I do want to share a true story that was brilliant. A woman whom had supported and given up all of her own ambitions to make her husband a succesfull and well known CEO, got after 40 years of marriage orders to be gone in two days, just with her clothes and some small items. He would pay her an allowance for the next 6 months in the amount of 500$ every first of the month. If she argued he would pay nothing. She didn't say another word and started packing...an employee imformed her that he planned to let his much younger mistress move in asap. When hubby left for work the next day, she went and bought 4 pounds of schrimp to make him a soup and leave some in the freezer. After she had removed the shells, she put them into the hollow brass curtain rods in the downstairs living- and dining room and also in the master- and largest sparebedrooms. By the evening she had already left the house and the man invited his new lover the same night and they enjoyed the soup immensly! But after a week they started to notice a terrible smell everywhere around the house. they hired every specialist in the book to find where the stench came from...not one could find an answer. It got so bad they eventually had to move house and the best joke of all...His new girlfriend loved the curtains so much, she insisted to let them be installed in their new home. You can guess the rest...the stink was so overpowering, they couldn't stand the smell of eachother anymore and broke up within 2 months! Now that is sweet wrevenge, lol ;)

oldiesmusic from United States on December 27, 2013:

"Live well. It is the greatest revenge." Really true. Live well and good and be happy. :)

Winbig121 on December 24, 2013:

ill save the forgivness for god! not the answer I expected

Bass on December 21, 2013:

A person who forgives is disgraceful. The closest definition to forgiveness is 'forgetting' or 'accepting'. But what use is this? To forget the past as though it never happened... You're literally living a lie. And forgetting is not possible. It happened; who are you kidding. It's called denial and it's unhealthy. Forgiveness is a religious term and it's illogical. You can live a full a life knowing you were cheated, or go out a winner. Forgiveness is for the weak, just admit it. You either play the game or suck ass

a on November 23, 2013:

This is all bs!!!!!!

I'll forgive when I see them SUFFER!!!!! First

andriyko18h on November 21, 2013:

i use this auto dialer multi-dialer.com , its very good)

susan on November 10, 2013:

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Robert on November 01, 2013:

Lydia Whitcomb (aka Lydia Davison Whitcomb and born in July1981) from Providence RI (not Paris, France) is a very dangerous sociopath. She is a liar, drug addict and thief who has file dfalse rape reports and spread vicious rumors about people. She has been in and out of mental institutions and drug rehabs since she was a child.

Do not let her in your life or you will be sorry.

maeljin on October 23, 2013:

if anyone of you watches naruto then im like sasuke from it. I only want revenge nothing else i don't care what happens to me or anyone else i will not continue with my life until i get sweet sweet and cruel revenge. i have been bullied for many years i have tried to step up to them it never worked. Now im just waiting till i am 18 years old then i will get a gun and kill all the bullies very slowly and painfully. i will make them feel the pain they caused to me i never forget and i never forgive. that is my quote.

jonathan le on October 19, 2013:

im 13 in middle school a couple years ago i got into a fight with this kid in school because of him pushing me aroun i ended up kicking his ass but we both got called to the guidence office about it and had to stay away from eachother for a week now yesterday we had a achool dance and he was there! so an hour before the dance ended he saw me and i really dont know why he pushed me to the floor and got me in a chock hold and cause of him he humiliated me in front of all the kids i felt weak not even able to stand up to him a bully and u know what i want payback i been trying to forget and move on but cant cause it feels that i have to do something and get revenge cause of him humiliating me and cause of him i really dont want to face anyone at school on the following monday plz someone tell me how to get my revenge to show im not at a lower level than he is

Ronin on October 16, 2013:

Excellent hub, and sound advice too. When I found out my (now ex) wife had been cheating on me while I was away with the military, I was furious, despite the fact that if i'm being honest, I didn't love her anymore anyway. The betrayal got to me. I was in a complete blind rage, made worse by the fact that she had persuaded me to give my 12 months notice in to the Royal Marines (British) only 6 months prior to all of this coming to light.

I left the Military a few months after finding out she had been cheating,I moved out of the family house, saw my kids every other

weekend, but inside I was bitter, twisted and angry. All I could think about was revenge.

Then something happened, I just let go, stopped hating wished her and the guy she was now with (whom she had been seeing behind my back) all the best and started my life over. 5 months after starting divorce proceedings, I met an amazing new girl, 12 years younger than me (I was 31), gorgeous, intelligent, faithful and funny and we've been together over 18 months now. The ex and her guy split just 2 months prior to me meeting this girl and the shoe was on the other foot. Now my ex continually gives us a hard time, but we don't care, we're happy, thats all that matters.

Devika Primić from Dubrovnik, Croatia on October 11, 2013:

How to Pull Off the Greatest Revenge on the Person That Did You Wrong! an excellent hub and you thought of it so well. A useful hub to all readers.

Michael Hawk1 on July 27, 2013:

I'm back. You said, "The bad thing about a deep sense of a need for revenge is all bets are off and logic is out the window. People destroy property and go overboard to try to exact the absolute best humiliating revenge."

What evidence do you have that this is the rule and not the exception? Why do you assume that people quit thinking when it comes to revenge? I have found the opposite is true, because they don't want to go to jail they are very careful and methodical. Logic, far from going out the window, aids in ensuring that the intended effect gets done right and without any danger of repercussion.

The whole "dig two graves," "living well is the best revenge, and "karma's a bitch," all sound nice, but conjecture and wishful thinking do not match the reality that more people get away with acts of vengeance that the number of those who are caught.

Words to the wise:

(1.) Living well is the best revenge, but some people lack the resources and ability to "live well."

(2.) Karma is not a one-to-one cosmic revenge scheme that is "a bitch." It works through and within the cyclic Samsara. Karma takes into account the sum total of your actions. So, I"m sorry to say, karma might not do a damn thing for you other than provide you a lot of fiber so you can poop better.

(3.) What is the difference beween justice and revenge?

Michael Hawk1 on June 30, 2013:

SPELLS DO NOT WORK. There is no direct cause and effect. I strongly suspect that the "spellcasters" and testimonials about spellcasters here are scam artists who are preying on people who are emotionally vulnerable for the benefit of so-called spellcaster's bank account.

You people are bottom-feeder scum, no better than a thief taking a desperate person's last dollar or a televangelist who promises eternal salvation just so they can manipulate people into giving them money. Have you no shame?

rihana on May 22, 2013:

hmmm very intresting

donvitoc on March 29, 2013:

People misuse and misunderstand KARMA all the time. Folks, karma is not retribution or a one-to-one sort of cosmic punishment or reward. It is not exactly the same as "what goes around comes around." Many understand karma to be similar to the Christian idea of "what you reap, you will sow," in that it takes the totality of ones actions into consideration, but the cause and effect is an accumulation of one's actions, not just punishment or reward for one good or bad incident. Karma is not "a bitch." It is not "payback" for a particular wrong that has been committed. It is more expansive and related to the whole being.

So, yes, if the person who wronged you is a jerk and continues to reap ill on others or his/her environment, then karma is probably not going to be their friend. However, if they wrong you and that is somewhat or completely an anomaly to who they are, then karma will not make them "pay" for isolated negative incidents.

donvitoc on March 10, 2013:

Spells? Are you serious? Wow. What century is this?

It would be just as effective if I did nothing.

Folks, if you give someone money for some BS hocus pocus spells that won't make a bit of difference, then you aren't too bright and you deserve to lose your money to these quack scam artists.

Sergiu on March 05, 2013:

Came looking for something else but found what I was looking for. Thank you

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