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How to Pull Off the Greatest Revenge on the Person That Did You Wrong

How to Revenge Someone Who Hurt You

Revenge is payback; a way of settling the score and administering retribution. It can be something trivial and fleeting, or it can consume you and last many years. Sometimes revenge is in the form of a prank, is actually quite funny, and no harm is done by it. Sometimes revenge takes a completely different form with nothing funny about it, harm being done, and criminal activity involved.

Of all the types of revenge, the affairs of the heart appear to cause the greatest need for revenge. That being the case, that is what I'm focusing on here even though work-related revenge is what made me want to write this.

When we are wronged by someone we care about, our reaction is to seek vengeance and get payback. However, it goes deeper than that, as feelings of anger and spitefulness are a natural response to betrayal.

How Far Is Too Far?

Keep in mind that you have to be incredibly careful if you decide to get revenge on someone as many of the things you want to do to them are illegal and could get you in trouble. Destroying their property or harassing them are two options that cross that line. In just about every case, taking your vengeance to that level is a bridge too far and will cause more problems than solutions.


Also, keep in mind that if you do something terrible to someone else they may seek to get revenge against you, continuing a cycle of vengeance. They may see to raise the stakes even high and do something even worse to you.

How to Get Revenge

There are plenty of methods for exacting some sweet revenge on someone that has wronged you. The most important thing to consider is who they are as a person and what will devastate them the most. Personalizing your revenge will give you the best opportunity to get back at that person.

Ways to Get Revenge

  • Let the world know about their wrongdoing: Do something public that shames and humiliates them. You can take out a billboard or make a sign or something that is widely visible.
  • Destroy something they love: Find a treasured item that you know is important to them and destroy it in front of them.
  • Ignore them: If you are still in contact with this person, start ignoring them and pay them no attention.
  • Refuse to help them in their time of need: Again, this depends on if you are still on good terms with the person who wronged you. If you are and they call upon you in their time of need, you can give them the cold shoulder and let them down.
  • Show them up: Get in better shape, dress better, and start living a better life than the other person. Be sure to let them know how great your life is and all of the amazing things you are doing.
  • Make them look bad: If you have the chance, you can do something in public to embarrass them and demean them.
Public humiliation as revenge.

Public humiliation as revenge.

How to Get Revenge on Your Ex

Breakups are difficult, and emotions tend to run high, so you may feel the need to get back at your ex. Here are some methods for getting revenge on your ex.

  • Get into great shape: Start working out and watching your weight so you can look like the best possible version of yourself. Developing a toned and good-looking body will make your ex jealous and show them what they are missing out on.
  • Dress well: This goes hand in hand with getting in great shape. Go out and buy some nice clothes that fit your body and make you look good. You would be surprised at how much of a difference there is when you were clothes that fit your style/aesthetic.
  • Give them mixed signals: Depending on how your relationship ended, this may not be possible, but if you're in the position to act hot and cold towards them then do so.
  • Publicly humiliate them: You can call your ex out on social media or do something more public that will show the world how terrible of a person they are.

How to Get Revenge on Someone Who Cheated on You

If your significant other cheated on you, that is a massive breach of trust and if getting back at them for betraying you is something you want to do, here are some creative ideas.

  • Take out an ad in the newspaper: Pay for an advertisement in the local paper calling out your significant other for cheating on you.
  • Stuff your living space with frozen fish: If you two live together you can get a bunch of frozen fish or shrimp and stuff it in a hard to find spot. As the fish thaws out and rots, it will leave a horrendous smell that will make it impossible to live there.
  • Swap numbers in their phone: If you have the ability to, go into their phone and switch the numbers in their contacts. That way when they text the person they are cheating on you with, they will instead be texting someone else, like their mother or boss!
  • Destroy something they value: You should know some of their favorite possessions, so pick one to destroy.

Why Do We Want Revenge?

Wanting to get revenge on someone who wronged you is a natural response for anyone to have. But why do we feel this way? Are feelings of anger and spitefulness natural even in people who are not prone to anger or bitterness?

We are hardwired to develop social bonds with other people, and when we are betrayed by those people and that trust is broken, our reaction is to want to make them suffer. When it comes to most revenge plots, this happens to be the case. Rarely do we ever think about getting back at a stranger who has wronged us; it is typically when we are betrayed by someone we care about that we feel the need to get revenge.

Initially, the idea of getting revenge seems pleasurable to us, that if we make the other person suffer the way they made us suffer that our suffering will decrease. And while vengeance may feel great at the moment, it actually prolongs the feelings of anger and resentment.

Understanding the Consequences of Revenge

As I have already talked about, you have to understand the consequences and ramifications of getting revenge on someone. What are you trying to accomplish and what will be the outcome? If you get your revenge is that somehow going to make the pain and anger go away, or will it amplify it?

In many cases, you will realize that ultimately getting revenge on someone that wronged you will not make you feel any better and that the best approach is to forget about the whole incident or forgive the person who wronged you.

Doing something that causes significant damage to the other person or their property will only make things worse. While it may seem like the best option while in the throes of passion and anger, once those raw emotions dissipate over time, you will realize there is a better option for exacting your revenge, which is forgiveness.

The Best Revenge Is Living Well

As trite as it is going to sound, the best revenge is to forgive, live well, and succeed. The immediate satisfaction is not there; I will definitely grant you that. You know the one I'm talking about. The one you dream about, the one you fantasize about when you are thinking about which revenge you are going to use, and you are picturing the reaction, the stun on their smug face. But the satisfaction is fleeting and will only come back and bite you in the end (either financially or emotionally).

Many people say that "living well is the best revenge," and it is true: if you focus on living your best life that will yield the best outcome for you. While it may be hard to do that at first, continuing to pursue vengeance will only lead to more anger and frustration.

Spite Is Not Satisfying

When you do something spiteful, you might as well go to the other person in tears and lay down on the ground in front of them and let them walk all over you. You are letting them know that you are devastated and that they have an emotional hold on you.

So we have established that the spiteful revenge, although briefly satisfying, is definitely not the best approach. By carrying the need for revenge, you are keeping yourself from moving on and healing.

How to Forgive Someone Who Has Wronged You

I think the only way to move on from this type of situation is to forgive. Talk about the hardest thing in the world! It is easy to forgive people you like, but to forgive someone who has betrayed you deeply and doesn't even care is much harder. Until you forgive them, you will not be able to move on. Instead, you will be trapped in a cycle of anger and resentment.

Letting Go

One of the hardest things to do is to let go of your hate and other negative emotions. However, in order to move on with your life, you have to purge yourself of those feelings. Giving into those negative emotions will not make your situation any better. Focusing on staying positive and making improvements in your life is the approach you have to take.

Revenge Isn't Everything

Now, the forgiving part is not instant. It is not something that you can just wake up one day and say okay, I forgive them, all the anger and resentment is gone. You make the decision that way, but you have to remind yourself that you have forgiven them when the hard feelings swell up. Keep telling yourself that you forgive them, pray to forgive them, and eventually, you will realize that you mean it and that you really do forgive them.

The next part is easier. Once you can move past what happened, live well and succeed. The reason this is easier is that you are not carrying the baggage of anger, which is extremely heavy baggage. Now, everyone's definition of living well and succeeding is different. Mine is being happy; enjoying life. No person should count on another person for happiness. Be happy with yourself and who you are. The rest is just topping on the cake. It is much better to be happy by yourself than be miserable with someone else, trust me on this one.

When you seek revenge, you dig two graves.

— Confucius

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2008 New Reflection