Cheating From the Perspective of the "Other Woman"

Updated on November 1, 2016

The Cheating Husband's "Other Woman"

One of the most interesting aspects of an illicit affair is the perspective of the "other woman." Most of us have a hard time feeling pity for the woman who plays the role as the "other woman" in an affair. Many wives choose to blame her for the affair, rather than the unfaithful husband.

For example, in a recent interview Elizabeth Edwards spoke of the mistress of her husband, John Edwards, waiting in the wings to take what was hers. While it was obvious that Mrs. Edwards felt betrayed by her husband, she subtly attacked Ms. Hunter for being available. Of course, all of us as women want to put the blame on the other woman rather than the man we love, even if all trust has been broken and our hearts and lives have been betrayed.

What I have heard women say a few days after discovering that their husbands have been unfaithful reminds me much of siblings who fight among themselves, but will defend one another against everyone else.

We seldom hear the story from the point of view of the "other woman." Why did she become involved with a married man? What did she expect? What were the benefits of being his play partner?

What Most Attracted the Other Woman?

What attracts the other woman to a married man is as varied as the people who become involved in affairs. Some of the responses may surprise you.

  • He's married --- no attachments.
  • He has money.
  • He has power.
  • I love older men (even if they are married?)
  • He flirted with me and he's hot.
  • I did not intend to get involved. It was supposed to be a one time thing.
  • I wanted to have sex with him.
  • For the hell of it. I don't know his wife.
  • It was love at first sight. (or so she thought)

There are other reasons or excuses, including "I didn't know he was married." But, even when the unknowing discovered that her new flame was married, most continued the affair.

What Was the Bait?

According to most of the "other women" I have interviewed, the men treated them "special." One insisted that the married man treated her better than the average single man she would have dated. According to these women, a married man is more likely to treat them "like a princess".

In retrospect, many of the women stated that the man would take her to better restaurants, buy her gifts --- often very expensive if the men were older or financially sound --- and almost always try to fulfill her wishes, regardless of what she asked.  During the courting stage, according to these "other women" life could not have been better.

Most married men, by the time they decide to engage in a relationship outside the marriage, have become familiar with their wives at their best and at their worst. They have seen their wives with and without makeup. They have seen the bad and the good. Yet, with the "other women" the man has only seen the good. He has not been around her long enough to see the down side. And, there is always a down side.

The men have a tendency to consider the "other woman" as his fantasy woman. One of the women reported that her "keeper" (her word) had insisted on breast enhancements and collagen for her lips.  He demanded that she wear 5" heels with her jeans as well as her dresses.  And, she had to have her hair (drapes and carpet) dyed auburn. 

When they were going out, he would select what she would wear and occasionally suggest that she apply more makeup.  If she protested about too much makeup he would remind her that her job was to concentrate on making him happy. Of course, she had no distractions, such as kids or cooking dinner, when she was with the man. Her total effort was to keep him attracted to her and to make him happy.

Of course, over time the glamour fades. To quote Shakespeare, "Familiarity breeds contempt."

The Kiss is the Pitfall

Most prostitutes will tell you that they never kiss their "marks" or "johns" on the lips.  The kiss is the most intimate of emotional experiences. 

Prostitutes will engage in almost any sexual act with a man without any feeling of attachment.  However, a kiss is too personal and can lead to emotional attraction as well as physical attraction.

Unlike a prostitute who can keep the man at a distance by refusing to kiss him, the "other woman" is all to ready to share kisses.  This is the pitfall to the emotional detachment that most expect from a one night stand.

While most wives will ask their husbands, once the affair is discovered, about the sexual acts the husband and other woman shared, few will ask about kisses.  Yet, the shared kiss is the driving force behind the emotional attachment the husband has formed with his new lover.

What Makes the "Other Woman" Tick?

Of note, many of the women I interviewed had either been sexually abused as children or had low self-esteem for one reason or another. It must be noted that many girls who are sexually abused early in life become extremely promiscuous during their teenage years and as they mature. There is little value put on relationships with men and these women often show little respect for established family units. Sex is a tool of manipulation for these women to gain what they want or to fill a need that cannot be filled.

Men on the prowl are prime targets for these women as the women do not go into the affair asking for or expecting (in many cases) an ongoing relationship.

The Life of the Mistress

I have been lucky enough to interview three women who were actually mistresses or kept women for at least five years, some longer.  And, I have had the opportunity to talk openly with and question women who were involved with married men for short, yet destructive affairs.  Of the three who were involved in "kept" relationships with married men, the men were all rather wealthy and older.

Each of these women told stories that were very similar. The affair started as a dinner with an older man. Other dinners followed. The older man often took the younger woman to museums or to other places as a way of introducing her to culture. In this role, the man was a father figure and a teacher.

The man would purchase expensive gifts, eventually offering to "keep" the woman, renting an apartment or in one case buying a house for the woman.

The excitement of the forbidden fruit lasted between three and six months following setting up house. Sooner or later, the women were seen at less than their best. The men began to be too comfortable with the women, showing signs of taking them for granted.

One woman stated that she realized six months into the relationship that she had sold herself into slavery. She was "on call" twenty-four hours a day. According to this particular woman, all her friendships and other relationships suffered once she became a kept woman. On more than one occasion when she would have a night planned with friends, "he would show up and what could I do? He paid the bills."

Holidays, particularly Christmases and birthdays, became almost unbearable according to two of the women. One would spend days and weeks decorating for Christmas, only to spend it alone.

The other said she would dress for dinner on her birthday, expecting and having been promised a big night out, only to spend the evening alone looking at the clock on the wall. "If he arrived at all, it would be close to midnight. I would want dinner. He would want sex. Since he was paying the bills, it was sex."

After seeing and interviewing these women for almost a year each, I can only say that the early benefits --- the gifts, the flirtations, the trips and even the apartment or house --- lost their appeal within a year. These women were lonely, depressed, possessed no self-esteem, and as one stated, "I have no savings. He dies and what happens to me?"

How Did It End for the "Other Woman"?

Of all the "other women" I interviewed, only one had married the man she lured away from his wife. The marriage lasted less than two years. She caught him cheating on her and kicked him out.

Some of the others were still "waiting for him to leave his wife." One was waiting for "his kids to graduate college." Of course, she had waited for them to graduate high school. I bet she is hoping they do not go to graduate school!

One "other woman" had been dumped by her lover after six years of being his mistress. He had forced her to move out of the house he had bought for her to live in. When I first met her she was a recovering alcoholic. She said she never drank before they met. He introduced her to wine. On nights when he would not show up, she would drink the entire bottle by herself. Eventually she began drinking with breakfast. It became a problem the man could not handle in addition to lying to his wife and paying two mortgages. He ended the relationship and gave her enough money to return to her hometown.

Not one story had a happy ending. Some were not quite willing to throw in the towel and give up. And, a few stories had not only unhappy endings but tragic endings. The saddest part of all the stories is that all the women were intellectually smart and emotionally scarred.

When asked, "What would you tell someone thinking about going out with a married man?" each of the women I interviewed would tell any other woman to not take the first step, to never go out with a married man.

One suggested that "we all want to do what we want to do.  We just do not realize the consequences for ourselves, the men, and the worst part is for their kids.  If I were his wife, I would have killed me."

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

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        louis will 

        11 months ago

        I am happy to finally know the truth about my husband infidelities all these years…and promised solutionhacker78 to share his contact to anyone in need of hack help after getting all the evidence and proofs on my cheating husband’s phone….

        contact MARKFAGERTECH AT GMAIL DOT COM for any real Hacking job has my experience online with hackers have really been frustrating

      • profile image

        Mecca holmes 

        11 months ago

        I have always thought it was impossible for me to get a boyfriend of my own being a guy myself but after i met Dr Ojoka my life change for the better and the peron i use to have a crush on he helped me perform a spell[ritual} that made him fall in love with me and since then for the first time in my life i an finally happy and begin to feel like i belong to this world to also get help from this great man email at dr.ojokaspelltemple@gmail. com or WhatsApp him +2348144172934 and let him help you get your relationship back or make someone fall in love with you no matter the gender.There is hope for us after all no matter how the world may see us or look at us do not be shy try him today and let your life change for the better Beware Of Scams

      • profile image

        collins jack 

        11 months ago

        I started suspecting my husband when I noticed he spends more time with his phone and he

        wouldn't allow me touch it, wasn't comfortable about it, so I needed to spy on him, though I

        encountered lots of failed attempts trying to hack into his phone but I didn't relent, until I

        contacted a recommended team through a referral email I got on here, MARKFAGERTECH AT

        GMAIL DOT COM in no time, I got results. Thanks to this great team!

      • profile image

        danny vane 

        12 months ago

        Believe me u do not need to go through stress trying to hack into our partner's phone ourselves. It is advisable to hire a professional like markfagertech at gmail dot com in situations like this.When I needed to hack my partner's phone, I contacted this team and they did a good and fast job for me in less than 8hrs. They made it possible for me to see my partner's chat histories, present chats, text messages, incoming and outgoing calls, location fb and whatsapp conversations etc

      • profile image

        nicole emmi 

        12 months ago

        anyone here

        h a c k e r f r a n k 0 0 1 a t g m a i l d o t c o m helped me with my credit score. I didn't even have enough money to pay him but he helped me secure a loan to my account to do the job for me. Now I'm giving this testimony from my first house which I wouldn't have got without his help. You can contact him also, I'm sure he would be able to help you too. Try him out and thank me later.

      • profile image

        enny flora 

        12 months ago

        i have strong believe in him i never know everything will turn out this good when i meet him i was thinking there in nothing he can do but i decided to give him a trial then he really surprise me he helped me look into my wifes phone to know if she was having an affair he is really good and wise he is recommended to you all he is markfagertech at gmail dot com

      • profile image

        June549 

        14 months ago

        Wow. You sound like a jaded wife. Comparing the other woman to prostitutes, saying she’s only with him for gifts, has issues, and the kicker- she lured that dumb, innocent, sweet husband away? Give me a break! Men don’t just cheat unless they are narcissists. Why are the only marriage vows that matter “foresaking all others?” What happened to love, honor, and cherish? Why are all wives victims? Life isn’t black and white like you paint it to be.

        My brother should’ve cheated on his wife and maybe he could’ve gotten divorced sooner. There’s so many women who play nice and sweet until after the honeymoon. Then they turn into neglectful, cruel creatures. They marry these men to get them to financially support them and that’s it. Most of these guys that get stuck are nice men for a little while. Sometimes it takes another woman to come along and give them the strength to leave after being beaten down by their emotionally cruel wives.

        Also, the man who cheats is the one responsible not the woman he tells that he loves, wants to spend his life with, and begs her to please just wait a little bit while he sorts it out. Get off your high horses.

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        A nony mouse 

        17 months ago

        Teresa,

        doubtless, some women do set out to be mistresses, probably because they do not want a full-time relationship or because they do not want the tiresome responsible bits of a full-time situation. No, I do not have much pity for them either, if they want that sort of relationship they should engage with the polyamorous or tantra communities out there, where everyone knows the score.

        However, many mistresses are simply the victims of men that tell them a pack of lies. My ex-husband left myself and our 10-month-old child for his mistress. Whilst they were having their affair, she phoned one day and I picked up. I asked her to stay away from my husband as she was breaking our family up. Her reaction was how dare I tell her what to do. She made out that I was the reason he was having an affair. At that point in time, his computer was under surveillance, so I knew exactly what lies he was telling her, but obviously, I could not tell her exactly what I knew. I just said I do not know what lies he has been telling you, but he is married to me and we have a child. She said what I said was harassment and that she would complain to the police, I told her to be my guest, as she was the one phoning my home and having an affair with my husband the police would probably think her an exceptionally stupid tart.

        Just over a month later my ex-husband walked out to be with the other woman. It did not work out with her, she did not want him. He came back on the pretext of collecting some of his stuff and then he started to say he wanted to try again. There was no way I was having him back, he was not happy with this and tried to run me over. I am well out of it.

        The funny thing is, that after I kicked him to the kerb, the mistress phoned to ask me to take him back, to stop him pestering her. I told her that there was no way I was taking back that lying, cheating, scumbag and as she had been only too keen to be his mistress she would have to deal with the consequences of her own behaviour.

        I know that he told her a pack of lies. While it was horrible at the time and it is difficult bringing up a child alone, in a way she has done me a favour in getting this scumbag out of my life. Since then the police have informed me that he has served time for his behaviour towards his new wife and family So altogether a lucky escape for me courtesy of the other woman.

        The other woman will be naive enough to accept the guys lies, pity her. There just might be some unexpected karma coming their way!

      • profile image

        Teresa 

        17 months ago

        Just reading the comments am i see one person has the balls to say no one thinks of the other woman as a victim!

        BULLSHIT! Ive been with a man for over 2 years, he is the love of my life. Ive recently found out that for a few months he was seeing another woman. She started talking to him, he fed into it.

        Do I think of her as a victim? Fuck no! This is a woman that walked herself into my life and started fucking around with a man she knew was in a relationship! Did she even think of his home, family, me when she started talking to him? Fuck no!

        Did she probably laugh at me? Probably

        The other woman/man is not a victim. Amd there are no accidents when it comes to cheating.

        You did it! You mean to do it! You gave no care for the person at home cooking, cleaning, taking care of your kids, cooking you food and sleeping in your bed!

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        Anje 

        18 months ago

        It is said that most of the people even donot want to consider the fact that there are times that such 'other women' also falls as a victim. Who had been put upon with false hope with the guy, who had been lied too and who had no intention of stealing other womens men, but they are made to realise that the guy is soon going to end the relationship and is just looking for the "right" time. It is sad that the other women is always considered as a slut rather than a women who had been tricked by the guy as well.

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        Lynne69 

        18 months ago

        Cheaters never win!

        On August 10th 2017, I received a phone call from a woman who said she had been seeing my now ex for a two months.

        She knew all about me and didn’t care.

        I told her she could have him; she said she doesn’t want him either. (LIES)

        My ex stalked me at work and home and called me constantly, eventually we decided to work it out.

        This must have infuriated the woman and she cursed me to no end. Calling me all kinds of b*tches.

        She was upset because we were trying to work it out.

        She continued calling my phone, so I changed my number.

        She tried to get back into his life by coming to visit and telling him she had cancer.

        Who would turn away a dying woman?

        I decided to end the relationship after trying with him and not feeling the same towards him. I tried but I could no longer trust him.

        The woman died in January 2018.

        I had to ask God to forgive me because I, at first, didn’t care.

        I did feel bad, and hope her miserable soul rests in peace.

        He went to the funeral.

        We are no longer together, so in a way she got her wish to break us up.

        I have been blessed to meet a really nice man and we have dated since November 2017.

        My ex is miserable.

        You reap what you sow.

      • ArthurAdamsDent profile image

        ArthurAdamsDent 

        20 months ago from Winnipeg, Canada

        I would rather think feelings of the family's destroyed by the selfish decisions of people who make a conscious decision who betray those same families

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        HaniP 

        22 months ago

        One suggested that "we all want to do what we want to do. We just do not realize the consequences for ourselves, the men, and the worst part is for their kids. If I were his wife, I would have killed me." Bullshit. Every whore, man or woman never gives a fuck about the innocent party

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        Living with the enemy 

        24 months ago

        I am married to a worse jerk. Who when I asked for sex he pulls out acondom from his wallet. Had the nerve to show me a box of condoms. Now that he looks like crap, he hangs around the house!!!

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        Carol 

        24 months ago

        I completely blame my ex husband for the two affairs that destroyed our 24 year marriage and family! He disgusts me as both affairs took place inside our marital bed, GROSSE! He even bragged about no protection and allowed my 9 year old son at the time to tell me! Good riddance LOSER!

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        Sarah 

        2 years ago

        A. I never lured a man away from his wife. I didn't try to contact him at all when he was staying with her. He showed up on my doorstep after she kicked him out and said he was bothered I didn't try. I told him I have more self respect than that and don't help men be cheaters

        B. He never bought me expensive gifts or treated me like a princess.

        C. He wasn't older

        D. I wasn't his mistress, a fling, a friend's with benefits or etc. I told him I didn't do stuff like that because it's beneath me.

        E. I didn't think Id win him at the end because I don't compete in relationships.

        F. We were both separated. I don't date married men.

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        Summer 

        2 years ago

        I'm married to the love of my life.....He broke my heart and continues to d so. Yes it is hard sitting back and just letting it happen. For awhile I had no idea it was happening. Not until he got sloppy. There has been 3 women maybe more to have been at my door. For another woman to come to my home , it messed with my security and sense of peace. One woman had no idea my husband was married and the other 2 women was well aware he is married. Its sad, both women to this day do not care that he is married. I was at work when i saw on the camera this crazy woman was knocking at my door while I was at work. Yes I am torn, she obviously has had bad relationships, why make mine worse? She told me she doesn't care and she will continue to screw my husband. My husband has always denied it. I have found so much evidence..and not because i looked...its because he has gotten lazy and left things laying around.. and he comes home late nearly every day. On his days off he is never at home for the entire day. I guess I wanted to hold on to something that I need to let go. I am and will forever be a great catch. I ask for nothing and need nothing from him...obviously they need him... Both women( the ones I know about) have nothing, and both are barely making it....He refuses to leave the home, knowing he is wrong and has done me wrong. We have a great life! No bills, kids are all grown up and thriving...we can go on trips without thinking about the cost. All I can say is I love him and I am getting stronger every day as I move through this drama. I am hurt beyond hurt. How can he? How can they? Why did he? I was mad at the women because they knew about me and still didn't care about me. Why should they? I always felt that people had a conscious about hurting others, but some don't and I truly thought my husband wanted Me or just Us. Well he did this to our marriage, not those women. He could have walked away from them, but he chose not to. I am walking away, I have been walking away, slowly but surely trying to get my peace back....I'm walking away.....I have to. If I don't walk away he will forever have the power to hurt me. I have to love me more and respect Me more...someone has to do the right thing. On this day, I pledge to always love me first. I decided I am leaving and leaving for good.

      • Levertis Steele profile image

        Levertis Steele 

        4 years ago from Southern Clime

        Some Johns decide to keep their prostitutes with the promise to pay and shower them with enough to keep them from seeking others for money. Prostitutes and kept women are basically looking for the same things. What, then, is the difference between the two? They both perform for money. Isn't a kept woman, or mistress, a full-time prostitute?

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        sophie 

        4 years ago

        my case is rather complicated. Am 35, divorced with 2kids and met this man 6 mths ago who 1st said he was separaated from his wife, on further enquiry he told me he had another lady who bore him 2 kids but married her according to traditional rites. apparently it was this that brought his real marriage to an end. we started dating and earlier on he gave the impression that he was no more in love with the lady he married traditionally but wanted me to be his mistress. he lives alone after his separation from his wife and gave a house to the other lady so he visits occassionaly thereby giving me full access to his home. he doesn't hide me from anyone, am known by his friends, family and associates. we live in different towns but he wants me to be in his house all the time without conssideration for my business. he also wants me to be exclusive with him even though he still goes to me the other lady and spends the night leaving me all alone in his house. I do nott feel any remorse for being with him and do not give any consideration to the lady that ruiined his marriage or even want to accept that she is his wife. what I feel for him also is not so much love like that but a way to get back to that lady that ruined his marriage and now wants to take the position of a wife. it hurts me that she could do that especially for the fact that she worked very closely with the couple before resigning to start being the man's mistress to the point of having children aand ruining a marriage of 20years with 3 children.

        there is no doubt this man loves me, but I am not sure to what extent he can go with me, he keeps going baack and forth, speaks bad of the current wife today, behaves another way tomorrow, use her kids as excuse to keep going to meet her, he wants me to be his wife today, tomorrow marriage does not appeal to him bla bla blam he cant seem to make up his mind while ensuring am for him alone by checking me up every hour,wanting me to be with him 24 7 etc.

        I do not know what to do, he has not made any moves to start divorce with his separated wife, d 2nd one that ruined his marriage is also hanging on to him, where does that leave me? am thinking of making myself less available to him, dating other men and just keep my options open.

      • Matt Jordan III profile image

        Matt Jordan 

        5 years ago from Gulf Coast

        Arrange your relationships so that you cannot be cheated on and cannot cheat. Agree that each of you are autonomous from the start. Don't try to "own" the other. Stay together because you want to stay together, not because your ego or religious superstition (usually both are one) demand monogamy. If you can't be cheated on, you have one less thing in life to worry about and people like Levertis' friend don't need to be SHOT!

        Such are the stupid things we do to each other and ourselves!

      • Levertis Steele profile image

        Levertis Steele 

        5 years ago from Southern Clime

        J-2012,

        You are making excuses for the other woman's offenses. Unless she is an idiot, she knows right from wrong. It is admirable to forgive the husband and the other woman, but who is going to relax and try to figure out if she is a good or bad adulterer? If the OW does not know that the man is married, that is understandable, but most of them do know and many prefer a married man. Keep reading their testimonies.

      • Levertis Steele profile image

        Levertis Steele 

        5 years ago from Southern Clime

        Jetta said, "None the less- the fact still remains- that the man did make a promise and that promise is HIS to uphold. Not mine. "

        She is right, but she is not wise. You do not have to promise a wife that you will not mate with her husband. There is no law against decency, morality. It is a law of life to do the right thing. Does a man have a right to rape your sister or child if he has not made a promise of decency to her or him? According to your rationale, he does.

        I had a co-worker who made the mistake of seeing a committed man. She was beautiful, had recently gotten a degree, about to begin the career of her dreams, had a son in college, and a whole promising life ahead of herself. She refused to let go of the husband and lost her life because of it. The wife was wrong to shoot her, but she is dead. The wife went to prison, but the girlfriend is dead. The husband SOON got another woman, but his wife is in PRISON, and his soon forgotten girlfriend is DEAD. This is about a selfish man and two women who were fighting over trash and lost everything.

        My point to Jetta's statement is that a person does not have to make a vow to anyone to be obligated to do the right thing. We all owe it to our fellows to not tresspass against them or covet their spouses. It is only decent and right. You did not promise the sheriff of Green county that you would obey speed laws, but, if you are a bad-butt, truck through Green County, Alabama playing the part of a speeding fool and see what happens.

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        blessing 

        5 years ago

        I am Mrs blessing from USA, i want to share a testimony of my life to every one. i was married to my husband Williams Jack, i love him so much we have been married for 5 years now with two kids. when he went for a vacation to London he meant a lady called Mary?, he told me that he is no longer interested in the marriage any more. i was so confuse and seeking for help, i don’t know what to do until I met my friend miss Lina and told her about my problem. she told me not to worry about it that she had a similar problem before and introduce me to a man called Drakugbe who cast a spell on her ex and bring him back to her after 3 days. Miss Lina ask me to contact Drakugbe. I contacted him to help me bring back my husband and he ask me not to worry about it that the gods of his fore-fathers will fight for me. He told me by Three days he will re-unite me and my husband together. After three day my husband called and told me he is coming back to sought out things with me, I was surprise when I saw him and he started crying for forgiveness. Right now I am the happiest woman on earth for what this great spell caster did for me and my husband, you can contact Drakugbe on any problem in this world, he is very nice man, here is his contact drakugbespellhome@gmail.com He is the best spell caster how can help you within three days.

        Reply

      • profile image

        james 

        5 years ago

        My Name is JAMES.I will love to share my testimony to all the people in the forum cos i never thought i will have my girlfriend back and she means so much to me..The girl i want to get marry to left me 4 weeks to our wedding for another man..,When i called her she never picked my calls,She deleted me on her facebook and she changed her facebook status from married to Single...when i went to her to her place of work she told her boss she never want to see me..I lost my job as a result of this cos i cant get myself anymore,my life was upside down and everything did not go smooth with my life...I tried all i could do to have her back to all did not work out until i met a Man when i Travel to Africa to execute some business have been developing some years back..I told him my problem and all have passed through in getting her back and how i lost my job...he told me he gonna help me...i don\'t believe that in the first place.but he swore he will help me out and he told me the reason why my girlfriend left me and also told me some hidden secrets.i was amazed when i heard that from him..he said he will cast a spell for me and i will see the results in the next couple of days..then i travel back to US the following day and i called him when i got home and he said he\'s busy casting those spells and he has bought all the materials needed for the spells,he said am gonna see positive results in the next 2 days that is Thursday...My girlfriend called me at exactly 12:35pm on Thursday and apologies for all she had done ..she said,she never knew what she\'s doing and her sudden behavior was not intentional and she promised not to do that again.it was like am dreaming when i heard that from her and when we ended the call,i called the man and told him my wife called and he said i haven\'t seen anything yet... he said i will also get my job back in 3 days time..and when its Sunday,they called me at my place of work that i should resume working on Monday and they gonna compensate me for the time limit have spent at home without working..My life is back into shape,i have my girlfriend back and we are happily married now with kids and i have my job back too.This man is really powerful..if we have up to 20 people like him in the world,the world would have been a better place..he has also helped many of my friends to solve many problems and they are all happy now..Am posting this to the forum for anybody that is interested in meeting the man for help.you can mail him to okutaspellhome@gmail.com I cant give out his number cos he told me he don\'t want to be disturbed by many people across the world..he said his email is okay and he\' will replied to any emails asap..hope he helped u out too..good okutaspellhome@gmail.com ONCE AGAIN HIS EMAIL ADDRESS IS: okutaspellhome@gmail.com

      • profile image

        5 years ago

        Seriously!!!!! I dont know whether to be outraged or embarrassed for you..

      • profile image

        Britney 

        6 years ago

        I found out I was pregnant just after two week of breakup with my bf. Immediately I knew I had to have an abortion. There was no way I was ready to have a child, by my self without my boyfriend, and I wasn't strong enough to go through an abortion because i love my bf more than words can say. I had to tell him about it but he rfuse to accept and say why must it be after the breakup. I know I want my lover back but how? Because i cant go through this pregnancy alone. From the moment I seek for spiritual help online then I found a woman who do spell her Priestess Ifaa, People were talking good about her on reuniting issues, I contacted her with her email priestessifaa@yahoo.com, I never really have an idea how this things work but she sounds so real and straight forward. She gave me hope that in 3days i would have my bf back to carter for me and love me even more than i ever expected., I gave her what she requested for and Just as she said, 3days later my bf come back asking for forgiveness and pleading that if i dont accept him he would commit suicide. Priestess Ifaa is more than a spell caster. The moment when a woman needs to do what's best for herself even if it's hard for her, and I'm proud to say I did that we are married now with our child.

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        petra 

        6 years ago

        Am Petra residing in Greece, Hi to everyone reading this appreciation message to a spell caster that restore my home by bringing my husband who moved out because he said i could not give him a child. I didn't blame him anyway and there was no way for me to prove him wrong. i would cry all day and night till i saw comments on a spell caster in templeofancientancestors@gmail.com about how he helped a woman to bring back her husband.

        I was a little bit relief when he told me he can clean my tears and turn them to joy having my husband hoe and also been able to give birth.

        Hasten ordered for the spell he made mention of.

        What surprises me is that my husband came back home 6days after he has done the spell and at that very night we had fun in bed and in less than 2weeks i was pregnant. the spell caster bring light to my darkness.

        I gave birth to a son never, he's 2yrs old now. I give thanks to that spell caster that changed my sad story to unlimited joy every morning and night.

        The templeofancientancestors@gmail.com is the height of spell casting.

        Don't waste your time going in search for nothing else.

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        sandra 

        6 years ago

        Dear DR sambol, When I contacted you I was 6 months into a bitter divorce battle. I thought that my marriage and family was ruined. I found your Email: drsambolspelltemple@gmail.com and breathed a sigh of relief. Not only did your Stop Divorce love spell work super fast but you and your circle was there to help me and counsel me through every step of the process. You have helped me so much and I am happy to update you on our progress. Jordan and I have reconciled and have since renewed our vows. We are stronger than ever. I am so happy that you were able to help me keep my family intact. Without you I am not sure what I would have done.

      • profile image

        6 years ago

        Dearest helptemple

        With my heart and soul I thank you. You have given me the strength to perform the work that was making me emotionally, psychologically and physically ill. I have yet to finish but I am thankful I have made progress. People came into my life to help me. They helped with my bills, my mental well being so that I was able to make good decisions. Today I received the highest rating at my job even though last year was the most horrible year of my life. I have never been rated lower than far exceeded during my entire career and I thought for sure it would happen this year. With that comes a lot of responsibility and I hope I do not fail as times are still tough and sometimes still feel sad and helpless. I wished that I could feel like a women and a person again. To be able make good decisions and get through this paperwork. Any help financially I would be extremely grateful. If it was more than I needed than I would do good with it. I have been provided with all that I prayed for.

        I am extremely grateful to you and all that you do. You are very gifted and I will never forget you. I am also grateful for the Blessed Mother, Jesus, God and St. Anthony whom I also pray to.

        I hope that my journey in this life continues with a clear mind and an open heart and soul so that I can do good for my children and this world.

        Again I thank you and send to you all that is good.you can as will email him helptemple@yahoo.com

        D. from USA

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        TESTIMONY ON HOW MY EX CAME BACK TO ME 

        7 years ago

        My Name is Erick Wilson..I never believed in Love Spells or Magics until I met this special spell caster when i went to Africa to Execute some business..He is really powerful..My wife divorce me with no reason for almost 4 years and i tried all i could to have her back cos i really love her so much but all my effort did not work out.. we met at our early age at the college and we both have feelings for each other and we got married happily for 5 years with no kid and she woke up one morning and she told me she’s going on a divorce..i thought it was a joke and when she came back from work she tender to me a divorce letter and she packed all her loads from my house..i ran mad and i tried all i could to have her back but all did not work out..i was lonely for almost 4 years…So when i told the spell caster what happened he said he will help me and he asked for her full name and her picture..i gave him that..At first i was skeptical but i gave it a try cos h ave tried so many spell casters and there is no solution…so when he finished with the readings,he got back to me that she’s with a man and that man is the reason why she left me…The spell caster said he will help me with a spell that will surely bring her back.but i never believe all this…he told me i will see a positive result within 3 days..3 days later,she called me herself and came to me apologizing and she told me she will come back to me..I cant believe this,it was like a dream cos i never believe this will work out after trying many spell casters and there is no solution..The spell caster is so powerful and after that he helped me with a pregnancy spell and my wife got pregnant a month later..we are now happy been together again and with lovely kid..This spell caster has really changed my life and i will forever thankful to him..he has helped many friends too with similar problem too and they are happy and thankful to him..This man is indeed the most powerful spell caster have ever experienced in life..Am Posting this to the Forum in case there is anyone who has similar problem and still looking for a way out..you can reach him here: johnyiyi@rocketmail.com...... CONTACT THIS POWERFUL SPELL CASTER TODAY VIA EMAIL:johnyiyi@rocketmail.com

      • profile image

        MARRIAGE RESTORED! 

        7 years ago

        MARRIAGE RESTORED!

        I came to this Strong Healer a week ago after hearing his Miracles over the radio, my husband asked to pack out of the house with my kids and go because he wasn’t interested in me anymore. He said all the abusive words and said am not a good wife because I wasn’t working, instead I was wasting his money. I consulted this strong man for spell, crying not knowing what to do. he told me that he will cast a return lover spell that same day. It didn’t take time for my husband to call me apologizing and begging me to come home. The tender that he was waiting for was approved and started telling me that am a good wife so I must forgive him for the bad things he had said. My husband asked me to look for any University of my choice and will take care of my fees. Am thanking prophetharry@ymail.com for the Faith and Trust he showed me

      • profile image

        margret 

        7 years ago

        My ex-boyfriend dumped me 4 months ago after I accused him of seeing someone else and insulting him.I want him

        back in my life but he refuse to have any contact with me.I was so confuse and don't know what to do,so I reach to the

        internet for help and I saw a testimony of how a spell caster help them to get their ex back so I contact the spell caster

        and explain my problem to him and he cast a spell for me and assure me of 3days that my ex will return to me and to

        my greatest surprise the third day my ex came knocking on my door and beg for forgiveness.I am so happy that my

        love is back again and not only that,we are about to get married.once again thank you Dr. opingo spell.you are truly

        talented and gifted. Email: alterofcandletemple@gmail.com is the only answer.he can be of great help and I will not

        stop publishing him because he is a wonderful man.

      • profile image

        OW/partner 

        7 years ago

        I was with someone for 10 whole years - (since high school). The plan was the after graduating we would get married and we were madly in love.

        Anyhow, my now ex is indian and was taken abroad 18 months ago and whilst there forced into a marriage - his dad was dying and he was also beaten (confirmed by our friends)

        We stopped talking once I learnt that he had gotten married. He contacted me 6 months later saying he had been forced and I told him I forgave him etc. he said that he was getting divorced as he hadn't gone near the wife and stayed true to me - I told him that if he felt she was someone he could like he should at least try, but if not then he needed to get out of there fast - he told me he HAD, and whether I would consider marrying him.

        I agreed - I was so happy! The plan then was to wait a few years till his divorce became old news in his community before reintroducing me and I understood this and the need for keeping it quiet.

        A month ago, 5 days before our 10th anniversary I rang him only to have a girl answer with you b**** - confused, I asked who she was and why she was shouting at me - she was his wife who he had NOT divorced, who had a BABY with, and who was calling me a whore...

        I've read your article. I deserve all the hate I can get. Can I just say though had I known for one second he had stayed married and was happy I'd not have gone near him despite the fact that he was actually my partner first.

        I don't have any anger towards him or her - she did not know just like me, and she has a child as well.

        I just wish I could die, because since the age of 14 I have been dreaming of forever with this man..... I was the one he was with for 10 years. I can't believe I am an OW.

        Our culture does a lot of arranged marriages. Some forced. I do not condone cheating, and if I had known for one minute he had not left his wife, I would never have taken him back.

        I hate the fact I have been branded a whore by his wife. I kept quiet on the phone when she was calling me all sorts of names and screaming at me that he doesn't love me, he loves her etc. The more she talked the more I realised the extent of the lies. I knew then he was married and had a baby...

        I guess I could have told her the truth, that I'd been in his life 8 years before she came in it, and I had been told he was divorced. I kept quiet because I didn't want to add any further pain or damage. I know my honour was taken from me, and this was the only way I could walk away with my head high. I apologised to her and put the phone down.

        To all the ladies calling the OW whores, maybe its true. But some women really have no idea, and by the time they do, they have been so emotionally abused they don't know what's what anymore. Lucky I have so many amazing friends that have helped me get through this....

      • profile image

        jenevive 

        7 years ago

        prophetharry has made me and my lover happy again, my husband came back home and he took me out for shopping, but he never used to do this before, amazingly prophetharry@ymail.com can make things happen!

        jenevive

      • profile image

        Poolgirl 

        7 years ago

        Poor Guy!! It must be tough no sex no touching no cooking and no divorce! He certainly has portrayed his life as a victim of abuse!

        He can walk away unless she has him tied down

        I think if I were you I would try to verify this terrible life he has!

        I have a very hard time believing him. Most married men say they are not getting sex and that no one cares about them. They need to get your sympathy

        If you are as cool as you say I would stay very far away from a man like this. For him to describe sex with her is pretty sick.

        Do yourself a favor and find someone you can trust

      • profile image

        catskillwoman 

        7 years ago

        "One should go to their spouse first to work things out or ask for a divorce." He tried both. She would not see a marriage counselor and she would not give him a divorce.

        "the Other woman who wants to find love and for whatever reason (has to be somewhat desperate or low self esteem)finds a married man attractive enough to carry out an affair" Actually, I think I'm pretty cool. I was attracted because I'd never been nearly as compatible with any other man.

        "she lost her right to him" Marriage is a partnership. When one member of a partnership defaults, that person loses their partnership rights. The other should be able to get out of it. He couldn't.

        For the first THIRTY-FIVE years of his marriage he did not cheat. He not only helped raise the kids, he coached their sports teams, did most of the cooking and some of the housework.

        " 'he didn't like sex'. I have never met a woman who doesn't like sex !" OK, what would you call it when she refused to have intercourse more than once per week, always did it in the dark, with her eyes squeezed tight, and when they were done ran immediately to the bathroom to wash? She never touched him below the neck, not with her mouth nor with her hands. The woman would have been happier as a nun, as she admitted, but once she was married, that was no longer possible.

      • profile image

        Jasmine 

        7 years ago

        LIFE sucks!!

        Just living is a roller coaster. There will always be pain, in some form or another. Life just happens

        When a marriage is in trouble, yes, as in all marriages, when there are are problems, many suffer. But, is that any different than when children are part of a family that has other issues, as most do. I think not.

        Men and women marry for so many different reasons. Young love is very romantic, full of unrealistic ideals. Life happens, CHANGE IS THE LAW OF LIFE! People change. There will always be pain. Many women would rather stay with a cheating husband, than live alone. Many women, like the OW, would rather have a small part of a man, if she loves him, than nothing at all.

        Live and let live. Look at yourself. Are you perfect? No one is. Not everyone have the same values or religion. Everyone has to make the decision that is right for herself. Life is full of pain, coming at us from all sides. We are all searching for happiness.

        For those of you with high moral values, and religion, seek your comfort there.

      • profile image

        Poolgirl 

        7 years ago

        These posts are really sad

        On one hand you have a woman who married the man she loved. They both made promises to each other No one held a gun to either ones head no matter what their age One day he breaks the promise and cheats.

        There is no excuse for cheating. One should go to their spouse first to work things out or ask for a divorce.

        On the other hand there is the Other woman who wants to find love and for whatever reason (has to be somewhat desperate or low self esteem)finds a married man attractive enough to carry out an affair For whatever reason she seems to think its ok. as some OW posted "she lost her right to him"

        Or "she didn't like leisure activities" ( really? Sounds like she may have had all the work with the care of the children since hubby was busy having affair) or "she didn't look good enough" hmm how many gorgeous women have been cheated on ? I especially like the post "she didn't like sex". I have never met a woman who doesn't like sex ! Whatever eases the conscience

        The man has created a total mess for his family with all of his lies. He really is a scumbag not worthy of his wife's love the truly injured party here is the wife

        In the end if he goes to the OW all she gets is a man who cheats on his wife. If he stays with the wife all she gets is a man who cheated on her.

        Both women have lost but the wife in my opinion didn't take part in any of it and she is forever punished

        Very sad !

        OW back off !

        Men resect your vows or leave before you cheat

      • profile image

        J-2012 

        7 years ago

        We women are so judgemental towards other women! We think we know how they feel, and why they do what they do. We feel they should feel and see the world in exactly the way that we do. We think they should share our morals, religion and other values. We feel that it is their duty to know that our man is off limits, and under no circumstances should this " other " woman become involved with our man. After all, he is MINE!! How unrealistic!

        This is especially true in the way we see the " Other Woman ".

        There are so many " types " ( for want of a better word ) of " other women ".

        A woman can become " The Other Woman " for so many different reasons. Some are despicable, but others are just being human! That's right, Ladies. There are many decent, normal, loving women who are " the other women".

        It is time we stop seeing all these women as whores, sluts, Jezebels etc.

        They are not responsible for your man's actions. And, no one ever died and left them responsible for your happiness.

      • Levertis Steele profile image

        Levertis Steele 

        7 years ago from Southern Clime

        The other woman may not realize that the money and gifts she gets from the cheater is payment for her services. So, she is not only a sex slave, but also a private prostitute. She also does not know that she is a cheater, too. She cheats another woman just like the husband does. She cheats his children, if he has young ones, especially. What should be important to her is that she cheats herself drastically. She can be a better woman than that because she is worth more than the status of "the other woman" or "mistress". No matter how the media glamorizes that status, it is shameful in the eyes of decency and righteousness. Once a woman gets the reputation of mistress, she receives a label and is distrusted by many single and married women, even her female relatives. Her upstanding girlfriends start drifting away, and she ends up with women friends like herself.

        Many women look at a wealthy cheating man as a candy man and often use him for that purpose. Most rich cheaters think that they are in the driver's seat, but that is not always true with the cunning, experienced women of the world. When these men discover that they have been suckers, they often try to scandalize, beat, and in some cased, kill the women. Their egos get very bruised when they discover that they have been taken for a ride. Some relent, and just walk away without trying to get revenge. Still, some lick their wounds, stay in their cages for a while, and soon go back on the prowl. This type loves the hunt even if it means losing. Sadly to say, this is the prime target for a candy man.

        If I were simple enough to cheat, and if the man was rich, I would not settle for less than riches for myself. I would also have as much fun as possible before my fall. At least I would be a rich, unhappy fool.

      • Levertis Steele profile image

        Levertis Steele 

        7 years ago from Southern Clime

        Sadly, experience sometimes is the only teacher when careless people insist on thinking with certain body parts. Once many years ago while I was yet single, an old married man asked me to be his girlfriend. He said that he loved and respected his wife who was bedridden, but he had lots of money and only wanted to see me twice a week. I told him that I could not stoop to the level of adultry and such a relationship, even if he were young. That was not good enough for me. I thanked God for helping me to listen to the echoes of my mother's teaching.

        Many mistresses or girlfriends do not realize that they are submitting to a form of sex slavery. The money and other rewards blurr their vision and make them believe that they mean love. To begin with, if a married man truly loved the other woman, he would tearfully walk away the way the good men do in the decent romance books. Sometimes, true love means letting go when it is the best alternative. Holding on to fire has often resulted in tragedy for many cheating husbands, wives, and the other women. Many times men's mistresses and wives' boyfriends have killed their lovers' spouses in order to pave a way to marriage to them. When it is discovered, it is too late for the cheaters to break off the affair. Even sadder, many cheaters are married to their chosen and may never know that the second spouse killed the first who was probably the cheater's preferred. Cold cases are real. When we view a TV program titles, "I Married My Husband's Killer," we express shock at the details. We shouldn't. Some obsessed people do not have limits.

      • profile image

        heather 

        7 years ago

        My names is heather from Australia, the reason i am writing this testimony is because i made a promised that who so ever help me out of my shit and predicament deserves to be known by the world. Am 24 years of age my boyfriend left me some months ago that am a piece of old cargo that there is nothing on earth that can bring our paths together as long as he breaths. i felt really bad because i loved him so dearly' one day i came across some testimonies of this priest called Lord kalifat so i decided to give him a chance. but when he told me things so personal which i knew was so secret that was only known to me then i gave him a chance out of my doubting spirit but to my greatest surprise my boyfriend called me five days later that he is so sorry for all the pains he has made me pass through. presently our love is more than that of romeo and Juliet lol. he takes good care of me now 100% than before.

        thank you so much Lord kalifat, here is the email address that turn my pains, sadness and sorrow into joy: lordkalifat@gmail.com

        from heather Australia

      • profile image

        Poolgirl 

        7 years ago

        1. The man is at fault 100% he made a vow to his wife

        2. The woman he is cheating with is never to be revealed that makes her a whore he has on the side (just like any other bad action is hidden drugs etc)

        3. If a man doesn't want to be married to his wife there is something called divorce so he is free to "date" anyone and leave his wife to marry this OW

        4. If a man really loved this OW he would leave his wife no matter what A man or woman that cheats thinks only of them self therefore they would think nothing of leaving if they really wanted to leave

      • profile image

        A_ woman 

        7 years ago

        WOW! How some women love to call the "other woman" a whore". And other names!

        These women must have been so hurt by a cheating husband. They need to lash out and they have to resort to name calling! How sad!

        They should vent their anger at the MAN! Not the other woman. They are so afraid of the truth, that they have a failed relationship. That their "man" did not love/respect/care for them enough to stay faithful. It is so easy to vent anger at the other woman! These women somehow believe that all other women owe them something. Just SAD!!!

      • profile image

        Poolgirl 

        7 years ago

        The other woman is nothing but a whore or unpaid prostitute.

        I also think you catskillwoman are delusional believing he is unhappy with his wife. He made the selfish step to cheat so do you think he is making an "unselfish" decision to stay with her. He probably came to the realization one day he is going to be old and the memories he wants are real ones family not sneaking around with a whore.

        Because that is the whole relationship with the other woman ...hiding hoping no one sees.

        And the comment about wife doesn't like sex is hysterical. I'm sure he is going back to his wife and a sexless marriage!

        Other women if you are so wonderful why aren't you his "wife"

        Face reality other women you are nothing but a whore I feel very sorry for you

      • profile image

        Christian Female 

        7 years ago

        I've been both--ow and the wife. I was unaware I was the ow the first time. Didn't find out until I got knocked up. He didn't leave his wife for me. I thought this was my boyfriend. I was so caught up with this man I wanted God to take him from the wife and give him to me. I realized later it wouldn't make my life better to want to marry a cheater. They divorced and now he's alone. I ended up in a fwb relationship to find out this one was taken, too! They were separated but got back together while I was still seeing him. After 2 1/2 years of emotional toture and embarassment on myself and for allowing myself to wreck a home, I called it off. We are friends since we worked together but has not had any sexual encounters since I got engaged with my husband. Now after one year of being married to my husband, we are separated. He been sexting with a coworker. Now I am getting back what I did to someone else's wife. It happened so sudden I didn't see it coming. I cared that I was hurting someone marriage. I just let my feelings get in the way. Now I am crazy crying to God praying for the return of my husband whom I love dearly. I understand the ow perspective as well the wife. Pray for me.

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