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How to Kiss a Girl for the First Time

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I enjoy giving advice to help improve the love lives of others.

How to Kiss a Girl for the First Time

Kissing a girl for the first time, whether it's your first kiss or just the first time you're kissing a new girlfriend, is an exciting prospect for most guys!

However, if your first kiss does not go well, there is a good chance that first kiss will also be the last. You see, many girls decide right after their first kiss whether they will ever kiss the same guy again.

For many guys, kissing a girl or getting to "first base" is often just a step towards getting more intimate with a girl. Girls, on the other hand, will often judge a guy by the way he kisses. It will often determine their opinion on whether or not he will be a good partner.

Your first kiss does not have to be perfect from a physical standpoint. If she has had other boyfriends in the past, you don't need to kiss her as she has never been kissed before. It does not have to be a long and passionate kiss, either. What is important, though, is that it has to be a positive and memorable experience for her. It should not be easily forgettable.

If you kiss on the first date and it’s not right, then there will be no second date. Sometimes it’s better to hold out and not kiss for a long time. I am a strong believer in kissing being very intimate, and the minute you kiss, the floodgates open for everything else.

— Jennifer Lopez

What Should I Do Before I Kiss a Girl?

Here are some things you should do to prepare for that big moment of the first kiss.

  • Have good breath. Nothing will kill a first kiss more than the taste of something like onions or cigarettes. Before going out with a girl, brush your teeth and tongue. You should also use mouthwash. If you go out to eat somewhere, you should pack some type of breath freshener.
  • Avoid having chapped lips. Dry and cracked lips do not make for a pleasant kissing experience. Use any type of remedy for treatment, such as a topical cream.
  • Make sure she is interested. If you are explicitly on a date, then she likely has an interest in you. Even so, you should still make sure she is comfortable with you. Try to get a good read on the mood and how she is feeling. If she leans in a lot when she speaks to you, or touches you a lot and seems to stay close, she will probably be receptive to your advances.
  • Get consent. If you are really unsure, you may have to directly ask her if you can kiss her. This can be very awkward and isn't very romantic, but it is better than making her uncomfortable with a kiss she doesn't want.
  • Be in a private spot. A first kiss can be awkward, and it can be worse if it occurs in a crowded place. You should ideally find a quiet and private place for your first kiss. A good place and time is when you are out for a walk, when you're leaving a movie, or when you part ways at the end of the night.
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Dilated pupils and extended eye contact could mean a girl likes you.

Dilated pupils and extended eye contact could mean a girl likes you.

How to Know If a Girl Wants to Kiss

Here are some cues a girl can give you that say she is interested in kissing. Knowing these clues will help you know when the mood is right.

  • Flared nostrils: A girl does this when she is taking in extra air to prepare to do something physical. She can do this when she feels excited or aroused. This sign may not mean much on its own, so look for it in combination with other types of body language.
  • Dilated pupils: Eyes will get wider and pupils will dilate when people look at things they like. If she is holding strong eye contact with you and her pupils are dilating, she is likely very interested in you.
  • Touching: The touch barrier has to be broken before you even think about a kiss. There is a good chance she is interested if she touches you frequently. You can give her some lights taps to see if she is comfortable with you touching her.
  • Preoccupation with lips: If a girl is thinking about a kiss, she may start licking or rubbing her lips. She also start staring at yours. This is not a sure sign that she is interested in kissing, but it should be kept in mind if you notice these things with other types of body language.
  • Body position: How a girl positions herself around you can tell you if she is into you. There may be strong interest in you if she has open body language. This can be her face, chest, and feet directly facing you. Her arms can be at her sides as opposed to being crossed, which can be kind of a barrier. She may also be close to you when she doesn't have to be.
  • Communication: You should pay attention to how a girl is talking to you. Is she asking you questions that try to uncover you on a personal level? Is she the one keeping the conversation going? Is she laughing at all your unfunny jokes? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, she is likely into you.

Here is some more advice on figuring out if a girl likes you.

Holding hands is a great way to break the touch barrier. Any type of of hand touching is a good way to tell if a girl is comfortable kissing you.

Holding hands is a great way to break the touch barrier. Any type of of hand touching is a good way to tell if a girl is comfortable kissing you.

Tips for Kissing a Girl for the First Time

Here are things to keep in mind when you are finally making the moves for your first kiss.

  • Make sure she wants a kiss. This can't be repeated enough. You have to be sure your girl is interested in you. If you're getting along well, she is laughing at your jokes, and she is fondly touching you, you are probably in the clear. You don't need to ask her directly for a kiss, just use your best judgment.
  • Position yourself in a strategic manner. The best way to approach for a kiss is to sidle up next to her. It can be awkward if you try to lean forward if you are facing her. Approaching from the side can be more smooth as well as feel a bit more intimate.
  • Touch her hands or back. This is basically a physical way of asking permission for a kiss. If she is receptive and wants you closer, you are in the clear for a kiss. If she backs away, then she is not in the mood.
  • Make a smooth approach. Try to avoid leaning in awkwardly for a kiss. Being next to your girl can help alleviate this issue. You also don't want to be too forceful when going for a kiss. You should try leaning in over halfway to your girl and let her be the one to make the final move toward your lips.
  • Use your hands. Your hands shouldn't just be hanging limp during a kiss. Use them to raise the intimacy. You can try holding her hands or cupping her face. You should definitely stay on the tentative side in regards to touching. You should certainly not be groping. You should give her some space to allow her to touch you.
  • Lay off the tongue for now. A first kiss should mostly be lip contact. You certainly should not be fully extending your tongue in there. Stick to small probes here and there for now.

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

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