How to Hug a Guy

Updated on August 3, 2017
tutta profile image

I'm Tatiana and am a firm believer in the power of holistic healing and home remedies! Apple cider vinegar for the win!

Guys Like Hugs too!

Here's a secret that most guys don't want to let you know... they love hugs! Even the ones that act all big and tough on the outside, are secretly hoping for a hug from their favorite girl!

If there is a guy you like, there's no better way to get closer to them than with a friendly hug!

In high school, I had a crush on a guy who was super extroverted, unlike me. I mustered up the courage to talk to him and we became friends, and yes, I even managed to give him a hug! Those hugs were the highlight of my day!

(I married that guy!)

Learning How to Hug

For outgoing people, giving a hug is no big deal. But, when you're an introvert like I am, giving a hug can be an anxiety-producing, stress-inducing, all around awkward experience, best left to 'if I have to' situations.

That's why I wrote this article! Interacting with others can be scary, but hugging someone, especially someone you really like, it downright terrifying! Learning how to hug will help you get over that fear!

So whether it's an uncle you haven't seen in years, or a your crush at school, knowing when and how to hug a guy will help you handle those close interactions with grace!

The 'Brother' Hug
The 'Brother' Hug

Family Hugs

Hugging family members is the easiest way to break out of your shell and learn how to hug! When it comes to family, hugs are almost always welcomed!

“The Daddy Hug”

Hugging Dad is no chore at all! If you haven't seen him in a while, give him a big squeeze with both arms, wherever you can most comfortably reach around. If you're just saying "See you later", a quick one-armed side-by-side hug is a good default for a fast "Love ya" sort of hug!

Daddy should always get a kiss on the cheek, too!

“The Grandpa Hug”

Because who doesn't adore Grandpa?!

Grandpas might be on the older side, but they still like a loving, tight hug! Go in with both arms and a big kiss on the cheek, squeeze him tight for a moment and be sure to tell him how much you love him!

“The Brother Hug”

Brothers are difficult folks to get along with sometimes, but no one will come to your defense quite like a brother!

Your brothers should get a very nice, quick hug that says "I may not always like you, but you're my brother and I'll always love you!".

Sisters can hold onto their brother a little longer, while a brother-to-brother hug should be a bit quicker perhaps with a pat on the back.

“The Creepy Uncle Hug”

Not just for uncles, but for any creepy relative! :P Don’t be ashamed, most of us have one or two of these in our family! To hug a creepy relative, don’t get too close, but still hug them with both arms. After all, they are family, even if they're a little weird!

The 'Boyfriend Hug'
The 'Boyfriend Hug'

Romantic Hugs

“The Crush Hug”

When you finally decide to hug your crush, there's two different styles to choose from, but you have to decide which is the right option for you.

  • "I like you, but don't want you to know." If you want to keep your crush in the dark about your feelings, then your hugging style should be quick and casual. Don't go out of your way to hug him or be the one to initiate, as it might feel forced and could give your feelings away. Instead, only hug when everyone else in a group is, or when saying 'bye'.
  • "I like you, do you like me?" Maybe you want your crush to realize you like him. If that's the case, then it's all about how subtle, or not subtle you want to be! Try a close hug, one arm over his shoulder and around his upper back, the other under his other arm and hooking back up so your hands meet, and with your cheek pressed against his cheek.

"The Boyfriend Hug":

Hugging a boyfriend is easy peasy, since you've already probably hugged him numerous times! Now the fun is finding new ways to hug him!

One cute hug variation to do with your boyfriend is to reach your arms around his neck, resting your forearms along his shoulders/collarbone. Make it extra cute by playing your forehead against his or gently stroking the back of his head with your hands.

“The Husband Hug”:

Every relationship is different, but regardless, at this point in your relationship, you should know what your husband does or doesn't like.

For my hubby, a close, firm hug, lasting several seconds, is his favorite. An even more romantic variation can include placing one hand along his cheek and giving him a sweet kiss!

The 'Guy Best Friend' Hug
The 'Guy Best Friend' Hug

Friendly Hugs

How to Give a Friendly Hug

"The Guy Best Friend Hug"

This one can actually be a little bit tricky, because although he's your best friend, he is still a guy and you never know, he might secretly like you. (Obviously, you know if that's even remotely a possibility or not).

With that said, playful hugs are a good option, hugs from the back around the neck, or hugs paired with goofy handshakes, either way, make it special and fun! He is your BFF, after all!

“The Friend Zone Hug”

For those guys who are 'just friends', it's smart to prepare a go-to 'Friend Zone' hug. Maybe they are just being nice, or maybe they're into you, either way, a quick, one arm over the shoulder sort of hug is sufficient to get you through the encounter, and will look a whole lot more natural than an awkward high-five counter offer!

“The Coworker Hug”

It’s not very often that you have to hug coworkers (thank God!) so the coworker hug is very much like the friend zone hug, but with a pat or two on the back in the process.

Guys Hugging Guys

If you read this article, you can tell I wrote it from a female perspective...


Girls aren't the only ones who can have trouble hugging a guy!

If you're a guy who needs some coaching about how to hug a guy friend, check out this video:

Guys' Guide to Hugging Guys

Whether it's a friend feeling down, a boyfriend or husband who need a little reassurance, or a beloved Grandpa or Uncle you're seeing for the first time in years, a hug is a great way to tell someone you care!

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

Questions & Answers

  • How do I hug the girl that I have a crush on? I am a girl.

    Assuming you know each other well enough, then "the crush" hugs are still applicable.

    If you're completely unsure, then it might be good to get to know the person better and get an idea of their views on relationships. That doesn't change the fact that you can still share a friendly hug, regardless of the type of relationship the two of you end up having.


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    • profile image


      11 months ago

      Hi so I have this guy that we just started getting close. Today he went in for a hug but I noticed to late and I already had said good bye. I wanna hug him to make up for it how should I? He is pretty quiet doesn’t talk much but he went in for a hug!!!

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 

      2 years ago from The Caribbean

      Well thought-out and wise suggestions. Seems difficult to go wrong with these. Thanks!

    • tutta profile imageAUTHOR


      2 years ago from Florida

      You could not be more right on both suggestions!

      Hugs are nice if the people receiving the hug actually want a hug, otherwise you're invading someone's personal space and could offend them greatly!

      And I totally agree on your statement about refusing hugs. If someone is creeping you out and tries to hug you, avoid them at all costs! Some people, me included, always try to be polite, but politeness isn't always worth it when you're dealing with a person who doesn't understand 'no thank you'.

      Thanks for stopping by and leaving a great comment! Have an awesome day!


    • tutta profile imageAUTHOR


      2 years ago from Florida

      Thanks for stopping by and the kind words! Yes, you definitely want to tailor the hug to the person receiving it! Giving a husband a 'coworker' hug will make him think he's in the dog house!

      Have a great day!


    • profile image

      S Maree 

      2 years ago

      The sentiments for these "how-to's" are admirable! How I wish I had hugged more in my youth! It wasn't until my mother was dying of inoperable cancer that I realized what they -- and I were missing! So hug, hug, hug!

      Of course, be aware of personal barriers. Some folks are uncomfortable & even panicky when arms reach for them. Asking permission is a good idea. Don't be offended if a hug is declined. The "hugee" will likely still be warmed by the offer.

      One last caveat; and it is critical! If someone who creeps you out wants a hug, you have the right to politely decline. A simple "No, thank you." should suffice. A creepy person who presses the issue needs to be avoided. Never force children to hug people they shrink from. Respect their instincts. I have very good personal reasons to make this statement and remind everyone that we must protect children from potential predators! And lest one should say "It's only a hug!", remember that predators seek every opportunity to get a toe in the door of trust.

      Of course we need to remember that not everyone who creeps people out are real creeps, but our instincts are there for self-protection and we should not be disparaged for minding them.

      You are a kind lady, Tatania! More's the reason you should keep encouraging true, affectionate hugs! Thank you!

    • ChitrangadaSharan profile image

      Chitrangada Sharan 

      2 years ago from New Delhi, India

      Very interesting article about how to hug a guy.

      Yes--the hug depends on whom we are hugging. It has to be different if we are hugging our father or grand father. Again hugging our son is different from hugging our husband.

      Nice pictures and enjoyable read. I liked how you named each hug differently.

      Thanks for sharing!


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