Top 10 Reasons to Get Intimate With Your Partner

Updated on March 12, 2018
Deborah Demander profile image

Deborah is a writer, healer, and teacher. Her goal is to help people live their best lives everyday by sharing her joy and love of life.

It Starts with a Kiss

Source

A Great Book for All Couples

The Married Girls Guide to Great Sex is a relationship book with a catchy title. The book discusses the importance of kindness and love in marriage. It also touches on sexuality in marriage, and the importance of building trust to increase intimacy.

Don't let the title fool you. This book is a great tool for improving relationships.

Not Tonight, I Have a Headache

People come up with a variety of reasons not to be intimate: We don't have time, I'm too fat, I'm too tired, the kids might hear us, I'm not in the mood, I have a headache, I'm still mad at you. The list could go on and on. The sad fact is, couples don't always make time to be intimate.

An article in Everyday Family discusses the "normal" number of times couples have intimate relations.

On of the hardest things for any relationship is determining when and why to have sex. Once you've been in a relationship for a while, you're not always in the mood, like in the early days of a relationship. And there hardly seems time, after you've been together. There are bills to pay and arguments to resolve and myriad other excuses that ruin intimate moments in relationships. Being in a long-term relationship can spell disaster for physical intimacy.

To make intimacy easier, think of anytime as a good time for a little fun. In the morning before the kids wake up, and before you jump out of bed. In the shower. A quickie at lunch. Before the kids get home from school. After the kids have gone to bed. There is plenty of time to be intimate with your partner. Stop making excuses and start looking for reasons to get up close and personal with the person you love most.

The bigger question is often why? Why should we? What's in it for me? There are lots of reasons to enjoy intimate relations with your partner. Usually, after you've had sex, you are really glad you did. The most difficult obstacle to overcome usually involves the mind. Mentally, you just don't feel like it. You don't feel like getting in the mood. You don't feel like getting your spouse in the mood. It's easier to watch T.V. and fall asleep. With just a small investment of time, and a mental switch, you can enjoy the following benefits of having sex with your spouse.

How Often is Normal?

How often are you intimate with your partner?

See results

Make Time for Each Other

Source

Proven Health Benefits of Intimacy

1. Having Sex is Good for Your Health

According to recent studies, sex once a week produces 30% higher levels of hormones that boost the immune system, such as immunoglobulin A (IgA), an infection fighting antibody that helps fight infection and illness. Besides boosting your immune system, sex is also a natural antihistamine. It can help combat hay fever as well as asthma.

2. Physical Intimacy Helps You Lose Weight

Passionate sex burns about two hundred calories, the same as running on the treadmill for fifteen minutes. British researchers have determined that the equivalent of six Big Macs can be worked off in a year by being intimate three times a week. If you had a choice, and you do, wouldn't you rather crawl between the sheets instead of taking a long run? Maybe you could run together, out into the woods, and enjoy the fresh air and sunshine, followed by a few intimate moments. And if you are busy getting busy, you won't likely have so much time for a Big Mac.

3. Intimacy Leads to Emotional Well Being

During orgasm, the parts of the brain governing fear, stress and anxiety are switched off. Oxytocin is released, which has an amnesic effect on the brain. (Read... You will forget, at least temporarily, why you were mad!) Endorphins are also released, producing a relaxing and calming effect, a sense of well being and euphoria. Sex is ten times more effective than Valium, without the negative side effects, although it can be addictive! According to Neuroscientist Adam Safron, in his paper Socioaffective Neuroscience and Psychology, the sensory absorption that comes with rhythmic stimulation can put you in a meditative state. It's relaxing for the brain as well as the body.

4. Having Sex Helps the Bladder and Prostate

For women, sex strengthens the pelvic floor muscles, which gives greater control over pesky bladder leakage. This can be a problem for women, after having children, and as a natural side effect of aging. Being intimate can help decrease the frequency of those issues, and will help you feel less self-conscious. For men, there is a link between infrequent ejaculation and prostate cancer. The answer seems to be, more sex. This simple step will keep bladder and prostate problems at bay for longer periods than doing nothing.

5. You Will Look Better

Extra estrogen in women, a result of orgasm, makes hair shinier. Sweating during sex cleanses pores and gives your skin a healthy sheen. Serotonin produces a sexual afterglow. You will look younger and healthier, and you will feel better after being intimate with your partner. In addition, men and women who had intimate relations on a regular basis were perceived to be 5-10 years younger than their actual age, in a clinical study at the Royal Edinburgh Hospital in Scotland.

Why Did We Even Do This?

Source

More Benefits of Intimacy

6. Sex Improves Muscle Tone

Regular sexual relations can firm not only the abdominal muscles, but also the legs and gluteus. And for those of you who are extra adventurous, you can firm your arms, chest and back muscles. Intimacy also increases muscle tone, helps with flexibility and elasticity of muscles, and improves cardiovascular conditioning. While it may not replace your daily trip to the gym, regular physical relations with your partner will definitely enhance your physique.

7. Having Sex Slows the Aging Process

Sex lowers cortisol levels in the bloodstream, which reduces stress and slows the aging process. These lowered cortisol levels keep you healthy and younger looking. Not only that, but intimacy helps you feel younger too. And the mood lift you get from having sex keeps you happy, engaged and productive in the rest of your life.

8. Regular Intimacy Fights Disease

Women who have more sex have higher levels of estrogen, which protects against heart disease. It also protects the body against Alzheimer's disease and osteoporosis. There are a number of health issues related to low estrogen levels, including a more difficult time during menopause. Regular intimacy and orgasm helps regulate those hormones and eases the transition. In addition, according to one study, 60 percent of migraine sufferers felt a reduction in pain during or after sex. Nineteen percent reported feeling completely pain free following an intimate encounter.

9. Physical Intimacy Transforms Your Relationship

Every time you have an enjoyable experience with your partner, your brain associates that person with pleasure. Increasing the number of pleasurable associations improves your relationship. When you have a positive experience with your partner, you begin to view him or her in a more positive light. No longer will the small irritants seem so significant, when you know you're in for a good time. Not only will you see your partner in a better way, but they will also view you more favorably. Overall, regular sex improves relationships and might even keep you from the brink of divorce. When you get the sex worked out, everything else seems less significant.

10. It Feels Really Good

Physically and emotionally, bonding with your spouse on this level creates an intimate bond. This bond is unlike any other. Your body feels good, your mood rises, you feel loved, and your spirit soars. Really, you need no other reasons to have sex.

Pick any of the above reasons to surprise your sweetie with a romp between the sheets. You will both be glad you did.

Finding Balance and Intimacy

Questions & Answers

    © 2010 Deborah Demander

    Comments

      0 of 8192 characters used
      Post Comment

      • Deborah Demander profile imageAUTHOR

        Deborah Demander 

        7 weeks ago from First Wyoming, then THE WORLD

        Jane, Thank you for reading and taking the time to comment on my article. I'm glad you and your partner are finding the time, space and comfort to experiment together. It really is a wonderful thing.

        Wish you all the best,

        Namaste

      • profile image

        Jane 

        7 weeks ago

        Thanks Debby for this wonderful write up

        Was just telling my partner bout it and decided to show him all you’ve said , sex sure is amazing and we experimenting more and more

        It’s a great feeling when it’s been done with the right person

      • profile image

        Allen 

        4 months ago

        I've never experience any form of intimacy (hugs, kisses, holding hands, etc) and I've never had sex because no woman could ever want me. The only way for me to experience intimacy would be to pay for it, which I refuse to do. I am 36 and have never asked a woman out (nor have I been asked out) and I’ve never even kissed anyone either. Complete rejection would always be guaranteed so there is no point in approaching any woman – just saying hello would probably get me accused of harassment.

      • Deborah Demander profile imageAUTHOR

        Deborah Demander 

        2 years ago from First Wyoming, then THE WORLD

        Dean, Thank you for reading and commenting.

        Unfortunately, there is not much help I can offer.

        Best of luck to you,

        Warmest Regards,

        Deborah

      • Dean Keak profile image

        Dean Keak Tegn 

        2 years ago from Ethiopia

        Wow! what a good article is it that has touched my heart like this. Excuse me Mrs. Deborah D., I do not even have sexual intercourse for 8 years now, but I have been felt in love with a girl from our Congregation where sexual is not allowed before marriage, so what do you think then? Even, when I read your hub I actually noticed that semen droplets have fallen for good, but no sex since then. Could you help me?

      • Deborah Demander profile imageAUTHOR

        Deborah Demander 

        2 years ago from First Wyoming, then THE WORLD

        PDXBuys,

        Thanks for the comment. And I agree. But I kind of thought I ought to offers some "legitimate" reasons to have sex, aside from the obvious one!

        Namaste

      • PDXBuys profile image

        PDXBuys 

        2 years ago from Oregon

        Hard to believe that "sex feels good" was way down the list at number 10!

      • Deborah Demander profile imageAUTHOR

        Deborah Demander 

        2 years ago from First Wyoming, then THE WORLD

        kiddiecreations,

        Thanks for reading my article. I'm hoping you will use some of these excuses to have a good time with your man!

        Namste

      • kiddiecreations profile image

        Nicole K 

        2 years ago

        Interesting insights here! I didn't know regular sex makes your hair more shiny! Good to know! Thanks for sharing all your knowledge

      • Deborah Demander profile imageAUTHOR

        Deborah Demander 

        2 years ago from First Wyoming, then THE WORLD

        Thank you for your comments, and thanks for reading.

        Hope this helps in some small way.

        Namaste

      • Naveed Ahmed 624 profile image

        Naveed Ahmed 

        2 years ago from Bahrain

        I came to this hub from another one of yours "Top 10 ways men destroy their marriage". I left my comments there that I read only some paragraphs and had a look at the titles of the rest. But this one was so interesting to read that I couldn't just let myself skip by only looking over the paragraph titles. It indeed touches upon an important aspect of our contentment and happiness in life, and these tips are worth an advice besides the valuable information.

      • Naveed Ahmed 624 profile image

        Naveed Ahmed 

        2 years ago from Bahrain

        I came to this hub from another one of yours "Top 10 ways men destroy their marriage". I left my comments there that I read only some paragraphs and had a look at the titles of the rest. But this one was so interesting to read that I couldn't just let myself skip by only looking over the paragraph titles. It indeed touches upon an important aspect of our contentment and happiness in life, and these tips are worth an advice besides the valuable information.

      • profile image

        Amy 

        4 years ago

        I hadn't had sex, intimacy love from my husband in about 45 years. He won't even speak or sleep with me, I'm just a nobody. He eats and sleeps in our basement. I'm sure the reasons are great, never had a chance to enjoy it.

      • Deni Edwards profile image

        Deni Edwards 

        7 years ago from california

        Great hub, Deborah! On that note, I think I'm due for some exercise!

      • blessedmommyof3 profile image

        blessedmommyof3 

        8 years ago

        Great hub! Sex truly is wonderful when it is with your spouse! The love and bonding between the two is priceless.

      • Trsmd profile image

        Trsmd 

        8 years ago from India

        Very good... But s.no 8 I am not convinced. Actually sex creates disease...

      • Deborah Demander profile imageAUTHOR

        Deborah Demander 

        8 years ago from First Wyoming, then THE WORLD

        Thanks for your enthusiastic support Tom.

        Namaste.

      • tom hellert profile image

        tom hellert 

        8 years ago from home

        DD,

        Hell ya #10 oh yay for 1-9 too...

        nice hubbage

        TH

      • Deborah Demander profile imageAUTHOR

        Deborah Demander 

        8 years ago from First Wyoming, then THE WORLD

        Hey Carolina, thanks for stopping by, You are right. Use it or lose it.

        Namaste.

      • carolina muscle profile image

        carolina muscle 

        8 years ago from Charlotte, North Carolina

        It's all about 'use it or lose it'!

        Fine post!!!

      • Deborah Demander profile imageAUTHOR

        Deborah Demander 

        8 years ago from First Wyoming, then THE WORLD

        Hey Al, You are right. Get the blood flowing. It does wonders. And you are right about menopause. Actually, mama always likes it with some extra attention.

        Namaste.

      • profile image

        Al Bell 

        8 years ago

        Good job... this goes for us old duffers too; maybe even more so. For us old guy's to have sex with out Viagra, you have to exercise and get the blood pressure medicines down. Just remember Mama has some special needs after menopause that require some attention. No more "Wham Bam thank you Maam." Happy romping.

      • Deborah Demander profile imageAUTHOR

        Deborah Demander 

        8 years ago from First Wyoming, then THE WORLD

        Thanks for stopping by and reading.... It's true, a good romp will make you feel better.

        Namaste

      • GeneralHowitzer profile image

        Gener Geminiano 

        8 years ago from Land of Salt, Philippines

        I think I need to bookmark this hub, it is very interesting..

      • thevoice profile image

        thevoice 

        8 years ago from carthage ill

        splendid hub right great love hub thanks

      • MFB III profile image

        MFB III 

        8 years ago from United States

        Men should laminate this to their headboards, then if there's any arguments about headaches or not feeling well, they can refer their partner to all the healthy ways a good sexual romp will make them feel better...lol~~MFB III

      • profile image

        Divorce in Nashville 

        8 years ago

        I'm going to have to start "losing more weight".

      • Chicagovision profile image

        Chicagovision 

        8 years ago from Chicago

        great one

      • mhuze profile image

        mhuze 

        8 years ago from USA

        Great article! I will have to agree.

      • Missi Darnell profile image

        Missi Darnell 

        8 years ago from Southern California

        Love this hub and your reasons for "doing it".

      • englightenedsoul profile image

        englightenedsoul 

        8 years ago

        Excellent Hub!! Rated Up!

      • Cheeky Girl profile image

        Cassandra Mantis 

        8 years ago from UK and Nerujenia

        Great hub! Any time is a good time for it really! Heh! Cheers! : )

      working

      This website uses cookies

      As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, pairedlife.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

      For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://pairedlife.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

      Show Details
      Necessary
      HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
      LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
      Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
      AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
      HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
      HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
      Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
      CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
      Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
      Features
      Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
      Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
      Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
      Marketing
      Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
      Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
      Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
      Statistics
      Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
      ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
      Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)