Should I Send Nude Photos of Myself to a Guy? Sexting Pros and Cons
There are many ways to share nude photos, sexting involves sharing nude or provocative photos through a text message.
With the increase of mobile devices and online communication, many women are being asked by men to not only send increasing amounts of photos of themselves, but specifically nude photos and even nude videos. While men are often not shy about asking for a photo, it is most often not the best choice of a woman to comply with this request.
History of Nude Imagery
Long ago, before there were photographs, men were fascinated by the female form and any attempt to get a glimpse of a naked woman’s body offered pleasure to a man. One of the oldest examples of art, considered a fertility symbol, is in fact a nude woman, a sculpture made out of clay. It is clear that the interest in the female form is intertwined with human history and our biology; it is natural.
Progression of Digital Photography
Nowadays, the availability and possibility of not only glimpsing the female form but seeing full-fledged pornography is enormous. Many of the methods of viewing photos and videos online were invented by the pornography industry. In the past a pornographic magazines offered the only way to view a naked photograph, since there were laws forbidding individuals from developing pictures involving nudity.
With digital photography and the ability to send and receive photos through mobile phones and the internet, men no longer need a magazine to fulfill their desire to view the female form and legality of nude photos now plays a minor role. Many states have enacted sexting laws regarding the sharing of nude photos in order to separate these crimes from the more severe type of child pornography statutes.
With the exponentially increasing rates of online dating, online relating and the sharing of photographs, it would be a logical progression that men would take the opportunity to ask for a nude photograph of a woman that they might be interested in, already involved with or even married to. This might seem like an easy opportunity to get a nude photograph, and it might be. But what are the consequences if the woman decides to share this type of photograph with a man?
What If a Woman Says “NO”?
If a woman says “no” she is making a wise choice. She will never worry about a nude photograph of herself being spread throughout the internet; she will sleep peacefully at night knowing that her body belongs to her and whomever else she chooses to share it with on her terms. Refusing to send nude photos might however cause friction in a relationship, but would a man that asked for a nude photo ever really love and respect a woman that would send it? The answer is, probably not. With this in mind she is not losing anything. Sending nude photos to a man does not help to build a strong foundation for a great relationship and only offers the man a temporary thrill. He will likely want more and not be satisfied with one.
What If a Woman Says “YES”?
If a woman agrees to send a nude photo she will likely have mixed feelings about taking the photographs, clicking the send button, and wondering about the effect of the photo. She will now be at the mercy of the man that she sent the photos to. The woman might get a sexual thrill from having shared the photo. The woman might receive compliments and gain a false sense of self confidence about herself, but in the long run these compliments are superficial and don’t have lasting effects.
The saddest part of having sent a nude photo is when a request then comes for more. One nude photo is probably not enough and requests for more will likely follow. This leaves the woman in an uncomfortable position of having to take more photos, send them, or say “no” and risk causing friction in an already precarious relationship. Saying “no” in the first place might have prevented this progression of events.
The relationship might also become overly sexual and drown out any possibility of building a strong relationship on healthy terms at least in the short term.
Do men really want these photos?
Men may think that they want nude photos, but if they knew of the detrimental effects on both the woman and the relationship would they ask for them?
What Do Men Get Out of It?
Besides the obvious pleasure that men get from receiving nude photos of a woman that they are involved with, there is also the conquest aspect. Men feel a kind of pleasure in have acquired these photos in and of themselves. They feel as though they have won something, a prize as such. This is part of what makes women become objectified by the photos. The man might use the photos as bragging rights and share them with buddies or even acquaintances.
There is a no return policy on nude photos!
All ‘sends’ are final.
Earning Mutual Respect
The real prize of seeing a naked woman historically would have been gained through courtship and the “prize” would be the mutual love and shared experience and respect, not the acquisition of photos. It is important to remember that something worth getting is something worth working for; if it comes cheap then it probably is cheap.
Women need to be careful and thoughtfully consider a request for a nude photo, although men might ask for them more than once, the answer doesn’t have to be 'yes.' If the woman is uncomfortable it is OK to say 'NO.'
Have you shared nude photos of yourself?
If you have shared nude photos of yourself, do you now regret it?
Would you ever want your daughter to share a nude photo of herself?
© 2014 Ariel Laur