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19 Signs a Guy Only Wants You for Sex

Amber is a writer with a diverse amount of knowledge and experience on various topics, including budgeting, parenting, and many more!

Does he want a relationship or just a sleepover?

Does he want a relationship or just a sleepover?

19 Signs He Just Wants to Sleep With You

Men are confusing by nature. They act so nice and sweet, but we can't help but wonder what they want at times. Are they after a serious relationship? Do they just want to have a one night stand only to ghost you later? We can't help but wonder when it comes to some guys, especially the men that send us mixed signals. This article will tell you all of the sure-fire signs that he's only interested in physical intimacy.

He Strays Away From Committed Relationship Talk 

When men want a relationship with someone, they bring up the topic. He may ask how you feel about being in a relationship or casually mention his own thoughts to see how you feel about being in a committed relationship. Your guy may also just flat out ask how you feel about long-term relationships in general.

A guy that just wants to get laid isn't interested in talking about a long-term relationship because he doesn't want one. It doesn't matter how you feel because he's only interested in one thing.

He's Just Not Ready for a Relationship Right Now

A man that is only interested in a physical relationship might find excuses as to why he isn't interested in a real relationship. You will hear that he'd like to take his time getting to know you on an emotional level, but he's just so physically attracted to you. He might tell you that he can't help but notice the sexual chemistry, even though he doesn't want a relationship. One way or another, he avoids a relationship with you but is very interested in getting in your pants.

He Talks About Sexual Things

If a man is only interested in a night of fun, he's not going to want to discuss your favorite colors. He won't be looking for common ground to build a relationship on. Instead, he will mention sex a couple of times to gauge your reaction.

No Real Intimacy

Intimacy is more than just the two of you sharing an intimate moment in between the sheets. Real intimacy involves deep conversations and using effective communication. Non-sexual physical touches like holding hands and giving each other hugs are also considered intimacy. Spending quality time together is another form of intimacy. All of these actions help the two of you bond.

The type of guy that is only interested in getting in your pants won't be interested in this. Instead, he has one goal, and that's what he focuses on.

If he doesn't take you out on dates, he might not be looking for something serious

If he doesn't take you out on dates, he might not be looking for something serious

You Don't Spend Quality Time Together

When a man is interested in a serious relationship, he doesn't ask you to go have a couple of drinks or avoid hanging out with you. Instead, he makes an effort to spend time with you. He'll plan dates and he'll want to get to know you. If you don't see him doing that, it's a sure-fire sign that he just wants to sleep with you.

Love Bombing

Love bombing is when a person showers you with attention and gifts early on in the relationship. This is one of the most common signs of an abusive partner. However, it's also one of the most common signs that he's trying to get in your pants.

This guy will be the perfect gentleman on dates. He'll use the power of flattery to get close to you. You'll wake up to paragraphs full of sweet nothings in your inbox.

All men do this to an extent to impress a girl that they like, but men that just want sex are trying to rush things along so that they can get in bed with you sooner.

He's Going Through a Rough Patch

This is the biggest sign that he only wants to sleep with you. Guys that don't want to be in a relationship because they are going through a rough patch are more likely to just want someone to cuddle with. Thankfully, they usually make this clear by telling you that they are not ready for a committed relationship.

He Only Compliments Your Appearance

It's normal for people to find other people attractive. However, the man that just wants to sleep with you will focus on your appearance above all else. He'll compliment your body, your hair, or your lips instead of your intelligence or work ethic. Paying attention to what he focuses on will tell you a lot about what's going on inside his mind.

He Is Known for Casual Hookups

If a guy is showing obvious signs that he's interested in you, but he's also known for just hooking up with girls, it's perfectly normal to question his motives. You should be looking for other signs that he just wants some booty.

He Stares at Your "Assets" 

Where a man looks when he sees you will tell you a lot about what he's thinking about. If he spends the entire time looking into your eyes, it's a subtle sign that he's interested in getting to know you and is listening to what you say. On the other hand, if he's checking out your butt or breasts, it's the biggest sign that he's more interested in getting to know you in the bedroom.

No Actual Relationship Signs

We've all seen amazing couples, and sometimes we've been one of those couples. You know the couples that are always there for each other. They laugh and share secrets. Texting and talking about nothing at all is normal. You don't get any of that from a guy that just wants to sleep with you because he thinks you're an attractive woman.

If he only calls you after he's been drinking, chances are he just wants a hookup

If he only calls you after he's been drinking, chances are he just wants a hookup

He Only Calls on Boozy Nights

You get random text messages to see what you're doing, but it's only after the bar closes on the weekend. He starts calling you to hang out after he's had a few drinks. It's because he's drunk, horny and just wants to get in your pants.

He Leaves Immediately After Sex

If the two of you are already sleeping together, and he leaves as soon as you're done with the deed, it's a sign that he already got the only thing that he came for. Some men will come up with cheap excuses to avoid conflict. He might have a legitimate reason once or twice, but if this happens every time the two of you sleep together, it's a sign he only wants sex.

He Advocates for His Awesome Bedroom Skills

When you do spend a couple of days talking or texting, he follows up by spending a couple of days telling you how awesome he is in the bedroom. He's trying to pique your interest in sleeping with him. If you're interested in more than just friends with benefits, just walk away.

He's Not Mentally Present

When the two of you are together, you can't help but feel like he's distracted. Even if he looks you in the eye when you're talking. It doesn't seem like he's listening to a word that you're saying.

It's normal for men to be distracted on occasion, but if this happens every time the two of you are together it's time to face the fact that he might not be into you aside from wanting to sleep with you.

You Just Went Through a Tough Breakup

Guys that pretend to be your friend while you're heartbroken and show the signs of wanting to sleep with you are just interested in one thing. Keep an eye out for other signs that he's interested in just sleeping with you to determine whether he's genuinely being there or trying to wedge his way into your life, and into your pants.

He Regularly Disappears

If your man goes ghost for days at a time, it's a sign that he's not invested in being in a serious relationship with you. It only takes a few seconds to send a quick text message.

No Talk About the Future

Men talk about the future when they want a future with you. Likewise, they tend to avoid talking about the future because they don't see you in their future. Men that don't want a serious relationship or are just using you will not want to make long-term plans with you. Test him by trying to plan a vacation together four months down the road and just watch his reaction.

If he doesn't want to be seen out with you, it could be a bad sign

If he doesn't want to be seen out with you, it could be a bad sign

You Don't Hang Out in Public Together

When a boy is just trying to get in your pants, he won't want the rest of the world thinking that the two of you are an item. That's because he doesn't have any intention of being more than a booty call with you.

Some guys tend to work around this by always wanting to have dates in another city. If the two of you aren't hanging out together locally, that's another red flag.


Why do I attract guys who just want to sleep with me?

This may or may not be a problem with you. Sometimes, we attract people that are like us. If you're emotionally unavailable, you may attract other people that are also emotionally unavailable. Regardless of what you want, there will always be men that are just interested in sex because you're attractive.

Does he want a future with me?

Men that want a future with you will show signs that they see a future with you. They'll make future plans with you, and talk about their own future plans. He'll introduce you to friends and family, and won't mind hanging out together in public with you.

Why doesn't he want a relationship with me?

He either doesn't want a relationship with anyone or feels that the two of you are not compatible long-term. You have different future goals or opinions on whether or not to have children. You may have personalities that clash. He simply doesn't want to tell you because he doesn't want to hurt your feelings.

The Choice Is Yours

The more of these signs that you see, the more likely it is that he just wants to sleep you. You need to decide whether you want the same thing, or if it's time to walk away to find what you're looking for.

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2022 Amber Lynn