Why Can't I Forget My First Love?
Why is it so hard to forget your first love? Your first love is special because it is the most innocent and pure form of love. No matter how hard you try, you will never stop missing your first love.
Boyfriends and girlfriends in a loving relationship for the first time will forever remember the hugs, cuddles, sweet whispers, long drives, late night conversations, and romantic strolls they had together. Find out why the beautiful memories of this once-in-a-lifetime experience will linger in your heart and mind for the rest of your life.
1. It's who you experienced intimacy with for the first time.
Ask anyone about the memories of their first kiss, first hug, first cuddle, and the first time they had sex. Their faces will light up with a priceless glow. This happens because experiencing intimacy for the first time gets etched in the memory forever.
Physical intimacy is usually experienced with first crushes and first loves. This is the time when a simple act of holding hands makes you sweat, and a romantic hug gives you goosebumps all over your body.
2. It is the most innocent love.
One of the core reasons why your first love is so hard to forget is because it is pure and innocent. People don't fall in love for the first time with expectations or malicious intentions. It is a pure attraction, led by the heart and not the mind.
The beginnings of your first love are free of malice and manipulative behavior. The whole world seems beautiful, and life becomes perfect. It is like wearing rose-tinted glasses 24/7, even in your dreams.
This blissful feeling of first love can never be replicated—once innocence is lost on a personal level, it can never be translated in its purest form into another relationship. This is what makes it so special.
3. It exposes your insecurities.
Your first love and first relationship will expose many of the insecurities you never knew about. For example, your first relationship will be the first time you actually realize what it is like to be a jealous girlfriend.
From jealousy to possessiveness to extreme dependence, your first love is when guys and girls realize how matters of the heart can bring even the strongest down to their knees. The memory of being exposed to your own insecurities for the first time will never go away.
4. It's when you thought that love is forever, and you attached all your hopes and dreams to it.
Guys and girls fall into love for the first time without any assumptions because they have never experienced love before. The puppy love effect makes them believe that this love will last forever.
This sense of lasting love makes you attach all your hopes and dreams to your first relationship. It is like wearing a pair of blinders and focusing all your life's attention and goals to just one thing—your love.
This extreme sense of attachment is hard to break away from. Even after a bitter breakup, you will find it impossible to see yourself living your life without your former significant other.
5. It's the only time you believe in perfect love.
Your first relationship is when you believe that your love is perfect. Your love knows only one language, that which is spoken by your heart. There are no hang-ups, no complications, and no expectations.
This sense of perfectness creates memories that are hard to forget. No matter how old you get, no matter how mature you become, you will always crave this sort of perfection in your relationships.
Once you move on from your first love, it will be disheartening to realize that you will never be able to recreate this type of love again.
6. It is emotionally intense and euphoric.
The sheer excitement of feeling love for the first time will engrave all the sweet memories in your mind forever. On the flip side, your first love is also extremely emotionally intense. The downer after every little fight and argument is exhausting.
This extreme range of emotional highs and lows make your first love a once in a lifetime roller coaster ride that will never be repeated. This is what makes your first love so powerful and intense.
7. It is like any other "first."
Your first love is when you let go and take a dive into the unknown. It is like the memories of all other "firsts" in your life, except that this one is much stronger.
Think of how you will never forget the day when you drove a car for the first time and then multiply that euphoria by a thousand times. Even that may be nowhere near the kind of impact your first love will leave on your mind, making it extremely hard to forget.
8. Your first love is carefree—there are no other responsibilities.
Your first love usually occurs at a young age. You have no spiraling credit card debts, mortgage payments, job insecurities, career problems, family issues, social pressure, or anything else that can make you feel like your life is just waiting to burst apart.
This carefree time was probably when you were a budding teenager, fresh into a relationship with your crush. You had no other responsibilities except to do well in class, which gave you all the time in the world to immerse yourself in your love. Basically, your first love was your full-time job.
As you grow older, your life is burdened with many new responsibilities, year after year. You may never get to experience the absolute and carefree experience of falling in love and enjoying each and every moment of it without having other responsibilities lingering over your head.
This is why the memories of your first love will remain on your mind for the rest of your life—you'll never have such a carefree state of mind again.
9. Your first heartbreak feels earth-shattering.
Just like how the euphoria of falling in love is extreme, so is the subsequent heartbreak. This is the first time you will experience what it feels to have your heart broken. This heart-shattering first breakup is amplified into an emotionally terrorizing fireball, including:
- The agonizing feeling of having your trust broken for the first time
- The painful sense of regret
- The haunting feeling of having bared your insecurities to someone for the first time in life
- The false hope that everything will be okay
10. The memory of your first love is tinged with painful regret.
If love was a poker game, your first love could be described as going all in. Peaking your levels of happiness will weaken your sense of judgment and make it hard to draw boundaries. This makes you do stupid things, including committing too early, putting your hopes into one person, getting intimate even if you are not sure, and more.
All these things snowball into a burden of regret after your first love falls apart. Why did I have sex with such a loser? Why did I trust her with all my heart? Why didn't I see that she was cheating on me? These are just some of the elements of the heart-wrenching regret that ensues after the breakup.
© 2013 princesswithapen