As a woman, I write a great deal about men who wear lingerie. To be honest, it has become rather a passion of mine over the past few years.
This is a tough issue, but I think that it is one that needs to be addressed. It has become obvious that many men who wear women's clothing, both those who wear panties and those who take their female fashions much further have difficulty sustaining romantic relationships with women. Some men even report losing several partners because of the lingerie, or because of the skirts and high heels.
This article will look at the question: why? It's easy to simply say that most women are evil and bigoted and leave it at that, but I don't believe that is true. I think that most women, once they fall for a man, will do almost anything to please him, in much the same way a man in love will try his best to keep his special lady happy.
As with anything involving human beings, the issue is complicated, but I have several theories concerning why men who wear women's clothing may find difficulty in maintaining a relationship, and in discussing these theories I hope to also provide some possible solutions.
Problem One | The Hardline Woman Who Refuses To Brook The Mere Mention Of Men In Panties
Women with hardline views religiously or culturally may also have a very hard time dealing with a man who wears women's clothing. To be honest, I think without being too harsh, women who possess hardline views are normally best suited to men who share the same hardline views and values. If a person, male or female, is unable to compromise on arbitrary conditions, then they require either a partner who shares the same value system or one who is prepared to nod and smile and agree.
Unfortunately, I have a feeling, a hunch, if you will, that men who wear women's clothing for the joy of being feminine and soft and passive, perhaps even submissive are attracted to these hardline women because it is easy to mistake inflexibility for strength. A woman who vociferously and aggressively defends her views may trigger certain responses in a man who enjoys his own feminine side.
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So, the man who wears lingerie finds himself dating a string of strong, though inflexible women who, far from indulging his desire for lingerie, simply forbid it, expecting to get their way as they always do.
Wean yourself off this type of woman the same way women learn to wean themselves off the 'Bad Boy' type. Yes, domineering women can be sexy, but unless you find one who likes her men to wear lingerie (and there are severe supply and demand issues with that little scenario) you're going to be opening yourself to ongoing heartbreak and guilt as these women reject you and your desires out of hand.
Problem Two | Identity Issues
The likelihood of this problem arising depends on the extent of your dressing in women's clothing. Some men like to wear panties and draw the line there. Some men like to dress up entirely in women's clothing and adopt female personas. Obviously, these behaviors sit at obvious ends of the spectrum, and men whose desires tend towards just wanting to have a few pairs of panties about the house are going to have an easier time with their mates than men who want their wives to call them “Susie Snookiepants.”
You have to be honest with yourself, are you the same person on the inside that you portray to your partner on the outside? If your spouse or girlfriend becomes confused about who you are, or worse, suspects that you are simply transitioning to a different gender, she will feel hurt and betrayed. Women want, above all, to understand and to empathize. If you make that impossible, she will not be happy.
If you have an alter ego, introduce your partner to this alter ego at the appropriate time. (The appropriate time being that magical spell in a relationship where you are past simply dating one another, are becoming increasingly intimate and the birds are singing in the trees and under every daisy is a little pot of gold.) Chemically speaking, you're both quite mad at this time, and this is the time where you set expectations and boundaries in your relationship. If you go through this time without letting her see your secret facets, don't be surprised if she freaks out later on.
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.