Jarvin is an online writer who likes to discuss various facets of relationships.
How to Communicate With Your Ex-Girlfriend
What is one thing that all relationships need in order to survive? It's not fun and exciting dates or big romantic gestures like you see in the movies. Instead, it's something pretty simple: communication. It's impossible for a relationship to succeed, or survive at all for that matter, if you can't communicate your thoughts and feelings effectively to each other.
At the moment I happen to be in a long-distance relationship, so I know just how important it is to be able to communicate with your partner. But this article isn't about how to foster communication in an existing relationship, but rather how to use communication to rekindle and rebuild it. This article covers the following five simple tips that will help put your relationship with your ex-girlfriend back on track:
- Give your ex some space
- Don't overwhelm your ex – play it cool
- Get a conversation going
- Ask to meet with your ex
- Have patience with your ex
1. Give Your Ex Some Space
This may be difficult, but the best thing you can do at first is to take some time away from your ex. To open communication you must first cut off communication. Sounds contradictory, I know.
The reason you want to take some time away from your ex-girlfriend is because everyone needs space. If your girlfriend just dumped you then something obviously must have gone wrong, so you need to take some time to sort our your feelings and figure out what happened. You also need to give her the same time and space to process her own thoughts and feelings.
If you have ever broken up with someone, then you know how hard (or even annoying) it can be when your ex keeps begging you to come back or won't give you space. That kind of behavior makes it even easier to say no to them doesn't it? So give your ex some space. Don't make it easy for her to say no.
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2. Don't Overwhelm Your Ex – Play It Cool
The biggest issue when trying to contact your ex girlfriend is to figure out how often and when to do so. You don't want to freak her out by spamming her inbox. Instead, you want to leave little messages, whether on Facebook wall or by text, that are easy-going and non-threatening like, "Hey, what's up?" or "How's it going?"
You might be thinking, "How is this going to help win my ex girlfriend back?" Well by leaving her little notes or messages like this, you're showing that you're still interested. And if she's still interested, she will contact you back.
3. Get a Conversation Going
Don't try calling her on the phone or seeing her in person just yet. Have a text message conversation, email, or wall-to-wall on Facebook. Try not to get too lovey-dovey with it, though. Keep it to safe subjects like how their day is going or what they have been up to.
You want to do this so that by the time you see each other in person you won't have that awkwardness that inevitably comes up when you haven't seen someone in a while and which could potentially ruin your chances of getting back together right then and there. Keep your conversations at this level until you feel comfortable and at-ease enough to keep it going in person.
4. Ask to Meet With Your Ex
There are many ways you can approach this depending on your situation. For me, my ex and I were pretty comfortable after talking online for a while so I had no trouble asking her to meet me in person. But you might not have the same luck.
5. Have Patience With Your Ex
The last tip I can leave you is just to be patient. You can't change how your ex-girlfriend feels about you or return to how your relationship used to be overnight. Don't try to force things into happening. Give you and your ex-girlfriend time and space to ease back into the relationship.
Communicating With Your Ex
Remember, these tips are just that, tips. So you don't have to follow them exactly. Every relationship is different and thus requires different approaches. But these tips have worked for me in the past, so I'm here to share them with you now.
So remember, if you are wondering, "how can I win back my ex-girlfriend?": take some time away from her and give her her space; leave little messages for her to show her that it is okay for her to contact you; get a conversation going with her either through text messages or online; meet with her in person; and just be patient. Give your relationship time to rebuild itself naturally without forcing it into a particular direction. Now go get 'em tiger!