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Do Older Women Like Younger Men?
Why do women like younger men? Why would an older woman want to date a younger guy? Why do women become cougars, and what makes a woman fancy a boy toy who is younger than her by a decade? This article examines some of the deeper reasons why a woman in her 30s or 40s may seek a relationship with a man in his 20s.
10 Reasons Why Older Women Like Younger Men
- Men her age may not be as attractive.
- She has more relationship experience.
- She is able to take the lead in the bedroom.
- Many men her age are married or in a relationship.
- She wants to feel young again.
- She enjoys experiencing the thrill of dating a younger guy.
- She likes taking charge of financial matters in the relationship.
- Younger guys are more fun.
- The younger guy brings excitement back to the bedroom.
- She's feeding her ego and proving that she's still attractive.
Older women know who they are, and that makes them more beautiful than younger ones."
— Naveen Andrews
1. Men Her Age May Not Be as Attractive
Time is not kind to anyone. Wrinkles and beer bellies are just some of the obvious signs of aging that can add years to a man's look. A woman may date a younger man if she feels that men of her age are not as attractive or handsome anymore.
One might think this is usually only the case when an older man seeks out a younger woman, but this concept works both ways. Older women can be attracted to younger men because they are in their peak physical condition and may have a full head of hair, strong muscles, and more sexual stamina.
This applies especially to women who have not let the years take a toll on their bodies and remained motivated to work out and stay fit. They may feel that they are compromising by dating with a man who is their own age but looks at least a decade older. She would rather date a man who is a decade younger but looks almost her age, or even one who looks noticeably younger, depending on her reasons for selecting a younger lover or boyfriend.
2. She Has More Relationship Experience
An older woman will have more relationship experience than her young lover. This makes the woman feel more capable of handling the ups and downs of a relationship. This atypical power imbalance can be an alluring factor in these types of pairings.
A young guy without a lot of experience may also not mind the woman taking chargein the relationship as long as her behavior does not come across as annoying or nagging. This can be a win-win situation for the younger man and the older woman.
Her additional experience also includes bedroom experience, which can be an exciting draw for the younger man. He can learn a lot from her, sexually and in the relationship department, and she can benefit greatly from his stamina and willingness to learn.
3. She Is Able to Take the Lead in the Bedroom
A woman in her 30s or 40s could be married but living separately, divorced, or never married but been in and out of many relationships. In either of these situations, the woman is likely to have had much more experience in the bedroom than her boy toy lover.
Because of this experience, she already knows what she wants and can, therefore, be considered a wise and valuable teacher. Due to his inexperience, she can mold him into exactly the kind of lover she wants him to be, instead of having to conform to his previously established ideals of bedroom activities.
Dating gets increasingly difficult for women as they age. A woman may be able to confidently enter a relationship with a younger guy knowing that she has had more experience in the bedroom than him. There are no insecurities and the fear of not living up to expectations is transferred from the older woman to the younger guy. If the woman is wise, she is able to take those insecurities and transform them into learning experiences for both her and her younger lover.
4. Many Men Her Age Are Married or in a Relationship
Lack of choice can be a real hindrance for a woman in her late thirties and forties. Many older women date younger guys simply because most men of their age are either married, in a relationship, or not interested in dating.
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People often enter romantic or sexual relationships out of convenience—they date their coworkers, classmates, or people they meet carrying out functions of their daily life. So when an older woman is looking for a new mate in this limited pool of men her age, she might not find any viable options and go looking for a younger guy instead.
An older woman may naturally start dating a guy who is younger than her for this reason; yet, she will be called a cougar because the term itself points to women who date men younger than them by many years.
5. She Wants to Feel Young Again
When a woman dates a younger guy, she is exposed to a life that she would have virtually forgotten about. The playful romance, romantic outings, and youthful love can make her feel like she is reliving her 20s.
The presence of a younger man will also keep a woman in touch with the latest trends and help her become swankier. He’ll help her keep up with the latest in music, movies, fashion, and media—something she may not have had a chance to focus on while juggling the responsibilities of marriage, children, and work.
To some women, this may seem like an exhausting aspect of a relationship with a younger man. But the reality is that our society celebrates youth and demonizes people—especially women—for aging. This is a two-sided coin though—while some women may be eager to learn about which hashtags are trending on Instagram and when the new Snapchat update is rolling out, others may find this unnecessarily draining on their already busy lives.
6. She Enjoys the Thrill of Dating a Younger Guy
Everyone likes to let off some steam after working hard or being stuck in a rut. There are many ways of doing this, and one of them is to do something taboo, like getting involved with a younger man. Society still expects women to “settle down” into their domestic roles by a certain age. What better way is there to “stick it to the man” than refusing to conform with society’s sexist and ageist stereotypes than to do the unexpected and get involved with a younger man?
The elusive nature of having a relationship with a younger man can attract an older woman who is looking for something that will thrill her and completely change her life. You often see older men dating or sleeping with younger women as a result of their “mid-life crisis,” so why should women be denied that luxury?
7. She Likes Taking Charge of Financial Matters in the Relationship
Cougars are typically depicted in popular culture as being more financially stable and independent than their younger male partners. This is because the woman presumably has worked for many years and is in a healthier financial situation.
This again goes back to the notion of taking the lead—she has more experience and power sexually, socially, and financially. A young lover or boyfriend can be a status symbol to an older woman, and being able to control financial matters further bolsters her self-esteem and empowers her.
She can buy her younger lover gifts, take him out on dates, and even take him shopping. This thrill of taking the lead in money matters may be quite an exciting and nurturing feeling for an older woman.
8. Younger Guys Are More Fun
Single men in their 30s and 40s can be burdened by many responsibilities. Mortgage payments, alimony payments, pressure at work, credit card debt, and children from previous relationships are just some of the things that can take the fun and freedom out of an older single man's life.
In comparison, men in their 20s have fewer things to worry about, which can make them more fun-loving and spontaneous. Younger men are more willing to go out for that midnight pizza without worrying about waking up early the next day (or getting heartburn), or they will eagerly party on a weekday without fussing about a hangover the next morning.
A younger man will also be relatively less occupied on a day-to-day basis, making him readily available for impromptu dates. All these factors make a relationship with a younger man a much less serious endeavor and a whole lot more fun, and sometimes, that’s exactly what an older woman is looking for.
9. The Younger Guy Brings Excitement Back to the Bedroom
Dating a younger guy can spice things up in bed. A woman who has just stepped out of a loveless marriage may feel the need to get her groove back in the bedroom.
It should be said that while it's true that sleeping with a significantly younger partner is a different experience, it's not necessarily always better. Younger men often have more stamina and may be more willing to experiment sexually than older men, who in turn have more sexual experience to offer.
While this is generally not the sole reason why older women like younger guys, rediscovering how it feels to be loved and cherished by a man can make a woman prolong her relationship with her boy toy.
10. She's Feeding Her Ego and Proving That She's Still Attractive
An older woman may look forward to dating a younger man because it passively feeds her ego and self-esteem. Knowing that she can easily attract a guy many years younger than her will make her feel more beautiful.
A woman in her late 30s or 40s will obviously feel flattered when a man who is a decade younger compliments her appearance. It’ll make her forget the age difference because she will feel like the prettiest woman in the world when a younger man in his sexual prime finds her attractive.