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Does He Like Me? 9 Signs He Is Interested

Updated on June 1, 2017

Is there a guy you like and you're wondering if he likes you back? This post highlights some of the surefire signs that a guy is into you. While some guys are so confident they'll just go up and ask a girl out, not all guys are that brave. If you want to know whether he's working up the courage or thinking of you as one of the guys, you can examine his behavior for any of the following signs that he's into you.

1) You Catch Him Looking at You

Many guys start off just by looking at you. You may even have caught him looking over you. He may have responded by quickly looking away, or by making eye contact and smiling at you. If you see a guy staring at you, he's more likely than not working up the initiative to come up and talk to you.

Likewise, a guy who sneaks glances at you may similarly be waiting for the right moment to talk to you. Either way, if a guy enjoys looking at you, he definitely is captivated by you. It could be something you're wearing or something you're doing at that moment. If he smiles or looks nervous when you see him looking at you, either could be a sign he likes you.

2) He Makes a Point to Talk to You

If a guy just suddenly strikes up a conversation with you, it could be that you got his attention and he wants to get to know you better before asking you out. If he started to talk to you out of the blue, it's a fairly strong sign he's interested. Why else would he go to all the trouble of talking to you if he didn't at least think you were cool? If he seems very friendly, that is also a good sign. Of course, some guys are just sociable by nature. But if you see sign number three, then you can be fairly confident he's interested.

3) He Shows Off Around You

A guy who is a bit more forward will likely show his interest by trying to impress you. Maybe he'll tell you about something he did he's especially proud of, or just casually let it slip what kind of car he drives, or that he's training for a marathon. Truth is, if at any point it seems like he is trying to impress you there is a very strong chance he likes you. The number one thing guys do when interested in a girl is to show her what they are made of and what they have. They want you to think they're a catch - that other girls would snap them up given the chance. He hopes that by making himself seem more high status, you'll be more attracted to him.

4) He Teases You

If a guy teases you a lot - gives you embarrassing nicknames, or makes fun of you, or touches you in small ways - then it's very likely he's interested in you. Though he might just be joking around, guys will often show their interest indirectly by being playful. Doing so allows him to express his interest without the risk of rejection. One typical example of this dynamic is when you ask him to do something and he says "no" or "make me" in a playful manner. Guys like to sometimes show dominance as a way of teasing girls. Some guys take this too far and can be downright nasty and immature to girls they like. If you notice that he only acts that way some of the times, then it's possible he just wants you to notice him and doesn't know how to get your attention in a mature way.

5) He Spends Lots of Time With You

A guy who likes you will try to find excuses to spend a lot of time with you, hoping that you'll become interested in him too. Some guys might take this too far and follow you around wherever you go like a lost puppy or suddenly turn up in your usual hang-out places. That can quickly go from being sweet to being pathetic and kind of creepy. He may also do things he knows you're into - like horseback riding or ice skating - as a way of telling you he'd be into doing those activities with you. The big sign is if he blows off his male friends to spend time with you. Guys will tease an aspiring Romeo who choose spending time with a girl over time with them. So if he’s willing to put up with friends making fun of him, then you know he's into you.

6) He Gets You Little Gifts Just Because

Guys do tend to be very logical when showing interest in girls, and it can be quite typical that if a guy likes you he will go out of his way for you to buy you a gift. A gift is a very big sign he either likes you or values your long-term friendship. He may also compliment you on something like your hair, makeup, or clothes. If you feel like he is being overly nice, then he is probably a straightforward guy trying to impress you. Personally I think this is one of the things a guy does when he is totally clueless of how to show interest in a girl.

7) He Asks For Your Number

Some guys will take their time to ask a girl so as not to rush things or pressure her. If he asks you to go out during the weekend when you've only just met, he likely thinks you're relationship material. If he asks for your number, he definitely wants to be part of your life and if he asks if you have a boyfriend, he's clearly angling for the position himself and is planning to ask you out.

8) He Remembers Small Details

If he's good about remembering your birthday, or other small details about you, that's another good sign he has a big ol' crush on you. Either he wants to impress you with the fact that he can remember these small things or he's thinking about you so much that he cannot help but remember.

9) He's Always Happy to See You and Gets Jealous of Other Guys

A guy is always happy to see the girl he likes. If he seems excited to see you, then it is likely you are the girl he likes and wants in his life. He may also get jealous or sad when you flirt with other guys. Some guys will lose interest if you flirt with other guys because they'll interpret it as sign you're not interested. On the other hand, some guys will pursue you even harder if they see you flirting with other guys since they're worried they might lose you to someone else. Want my advice? If your'e going to make a guy jealous, don't to it to the point of hurting him and scaring him off. Do it moderately, girls!

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      dareal man 2 weeks ago

      oh my god, I pray my crush never finds this, I legit do all these things without even noticing

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      lola 4 weeks ago

      so theres this guy that everyone likes at my school. he dates a girl and seems really intrested in her but he always comes up to me for things like oh if his girlfriend is here at school or something, because hes not in the same class. he also always comes up to me to ask me questions like, where are the scissors or like what is hi in arabic. i really need help please reply!

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      Jen 5 weeks ago

      I've been texting with a guy regularly,usually a few texts throughout the day and then long conversations at night.We talk about everything under the sun and recently we keep bringing up sexual topics.Wondering if he is interested in me because he tends to talk more with my friend(mutual female friend) when we hang out in person.

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      Amanda 4 months ago

      This guy always mocks me and try's to sit by me. Says my name across the room and keeps talking to my friend, he once was talking to his friend and he pointed to me and they were both looking at me. He always teases me and he laughs when I laugh and I sometimes catch him staring at me.Does he like me?

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      swaathy 7 months ago

      Yet I hadn't fall in love but i loves to love.so i don't know the feelings of loving.i feel this article as an interesting one

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      Jeff 9 months ago

      Hey jay, I was at work,and there is a subway in the job I work at combined with walmart, I see this girl every now and then when she's working, and we share eye contact, so one day I.ordered some pizza from there and I realized I didn't have my debet card so I went to hustle money but couldn't, so I came back and she came up to the register and I told her that I didn't have my debet card and I all I had on me was five dollars, and the pizza cost five plus toppings which is fifty cents extra, and she had this kinda sad cute look on her face after I wanted the order canceled and she just gave me the whole box of pizza for free, and I tried to give her the five since I had something because I didn't want her to get in trouble with her boss but she constantly refused to take my money and she said its okay, I already have enough money and I told her thank you, and she replied your welcome and she also giggled at,I don't know what for but I think it was the fact that I had a mouth full of pizza and I threw away the box but I.had to open it up.because the whole at the top was to small but she just walked by and giggled.

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      ianna 10 months ago

      hello, I meet a guy at a gym who is my boyfriend friend. before my boyfriend introduce me to him, when I entered the room, he stare at me with a killer smile,, and I don't know him first, and i just ignore that maybe other person he smiled for. then as the days go by, when we were doing work out, I always catch him staring at me more than seconds , sometimes smiling at me, he always on my side or facing to me, just saying hello and never to take conversation with me,, only he talks a lot to my boyfriend, and now he ignore me, I ask him one time, he never answered me,,, WTF, is he has a problem to me? Its just so confusing.

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      Rohan Rinaldo Felix 11 months ago from Chennai, India

      A wonderful article with good pictures! I am a guy and think all the points are valid. Keep up the good work!

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      michelle 16 months ago

      Hello, I don't know if you are still taking comments, but I have a question about my situation. The guy I’m crushing on is my coworker at work (he’s 25, I’m 22). We met in my interview and I felt an immediate connection that I never felt with anyone else. We first started texting more through phone before actually really communicating in person. After talking to each other almost all the time and we started talking more at work, we both started being a little more flirter (but I don’t know if that’s the way he is). He treats me different from all the other girls, he defended and protected me many times, he finds ways to touch me (either my arm or lay his hand on my waist), and he always appears in my aisle. Every time we talk, we would always just laugh and have a good time and I would tell him a little more personal details about me and he’ll tell me about him (I know him more than anyone (except one who known him since he was a little kid)). He even told me that he feels like the luckiest person in the world because of me. But my dilemma is that he has a girlfriend. The reason why I’m getting mixed signals from him is because when I found out he has a girlfriend, I pulled away multiple times and all those times he kept coming closer. For example, it was after Valentine’s and I told him that I need to stay away from him because he has a girlfriend and my feelings are just too much to handle being around him all the time. He gave me this distant look and he still came up to talk to me. I never heard anything about his girlfriend after - he NEVER mentions her. Also, I’m a very hugger because I love to feel affection from everyone, but I’m always shy to ask him because every time I do ask him for a hug, he gives me this “wrap around the waist/lower back” hugs and pulls me in tight (ANOTHER MIXED SIGNAL!). And lately, he has been teasing me a lot more and every time we text, it’s super like lightning fast. I don’t know what’s going on - please help!

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      kirthu 17 months ago

      Hi I m twenty years old however the guy who I loves so much is two years older than me he had propose to me before but I rejected for the family sake I likes him a lot and I wants him back but I m scared he won't. Accepte back what I should I.do

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      Jay Rando 23 months ago from England

      @candydrill. Hi there, 15 and 20 is a big difference of age and can be frowned upon for sure. I am understanding of someone your age finding an older guy attractive because older guys seem to be more mature and closer to the type of guy you admire and want to be with.

      On the other hand i think you know what i am going to say.. this relationship will not work out right now with him being 20 and you 15 your relationship will be strained for many reasons, you probably wont have much in common, he will be wanting to settle down and this may be too much for you at your age especially when you start to see the reality of expectations of adult relationships.

      If you decide to take things further he can also potentially get arrested for sexual activity with a minor. Don't get me wrong though because i am sure he is not that type of guy. However i do propose you talk to your parents(especially your mum) about this because they surely know best for you, perhaps if they are ok with this they may let you date him when you are 16.

      This really depends on your parents, however if it makes you feel better when my mum was 16 she was dating my dad who was 21. It is ok to be attracted or interested in someone older, dont feel weird or bad about feeling that way. See where you are in a year's or two time. I think that if by that time you are both still single and your parents "meet and trust" this guy then perhaps they will be more open to the idea of you two dating. Good luck

    • Jay Rando profile image
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      Jay Rando 23 months ago from England

      @Candy Queen. Hi again, have taken a break from commenting but i am back again now. If the guy tells you that girls love him is it possible he was trying to make you jealous by telling you such info? I cannot see why he would tell you that just randomly out of no where, if he did tell you that out of no where it could very well be a sign hes into you. So he told you he was going to meet a girl after class then didn't? Is that what you are trying to say? If so it does sound like he is making this stuff up.. possibly to make you jealous.. to get your attention and what not.

      Of course perhaps he was going to meet a girl but she stood him up? I can only speculate. But yes i think you have this figured on your own and you are likely right by what your thinking because i think similarly. i would not think too much about this and just let the pieces fall where they will, if he is into you he will probably make a move at some point, the best you can do is throw him some hints his way your into him without being totally obvious, if he gets it he will make a move. Yes guys are really naive at reading women but not to the point that they miss strong hints.

      But it is always a good sign that he treats you differently to other girls, that could indeed be a sign he wants you and not the other girls. We treat the person we like differently, generally that is what happens so I'm going to say there is a good chance here that he is into you if he is doing all this.. but beyond that i cannot give a certain yes, just a likely yes. Some guys can make women jealous just to play head games.. but i still stand by the idea that most guys who try to make women jealous are into them, the small percentage know you already like them and enjoy playing with your head. I hope things progress for you eventually.. Good luck

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      candydrill 24 months ago

      well this is not does he like me but there is this boy who i treat as a older brother and his brother but mostly him. I saw him again this year twice within a month. we also have a 6 year difference. I might start having a crush on him since he is like a best friend to me and i know i cant date him i'm turning 16 next year but that is not until the end of the year. i can't date him tho and i know i'm confused. I'm 14 bout to be 15 and he is 20.

    • Jay Rando profile image
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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @Chrissie87. Hey again, yes you and your friends are bang on the money in my opinion. There isn't much else for me to say except that you will meet someone else eventually especially someone who wont play any mind games or do anything that plays with your head. As always i enjoy helping out and giving guidance in anyway i can so feel free to come back anytime, you are welcome.

      I give you praise for your courage in going for it anyway, it can be difficult to show interest in someone especially when it ends up in some kind of rejection, rejections can be a good test of our inner strength and our ability to bounce back (this will make you a stronger person in other words). There are plenty of guys out there who will want to be with you and wont mess you around.

      Feel free to come back if there is someone else. Wishing you luck

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      Candy Queen 2 years ago

      Thank you for telling me about the sister thing, cause the idea that he might think of me like a sister was bugging me a lot. Other then that my first thought has always been he likes me, but as he's never asked me out I usually talk myself out of it.

      The idea that he might be a player is a possibility, though he's not the type to always have girls chasing him. Like he tells me that girls love him, but I know from other people he doesn't date often. I always figured he was just being a guy and bragging, but recently he started talking about some girl he met. One night at a martial arts class we both take he was telling me that after class he was going to meet this girl again, later I found out that he was going to meet his dad. Since that night he hasn't said anything about her (it was only like a week ago), and so I'm really confused by she was all he could talk about and then he didn't care anymore. The only thing I could come up with is he's either a player or he was trying to make me jealous (cause I didn't understand why he told me he was meeting a girl when he was actually meeting his father). But if he's a player I don't understand why he wouldn't flirt with every girl like he does (he doesn't treat most girls like me or flirt with them), or if he wanted to make me jealous why? If he wanted me jealous then that would mean he likes me, but as he doesn't ask me out after so long that doesn't make sense either. I can't imagine why he'd be afraid of dating me. So I'm back to the beginning where my gut tells me he likes me, but then I try to make sense of his behavior and I just get confused. I know I'm probably not being very clear, but where my crush is concerned I don't know how to explain my thoughts.

    • Jay Rando profile image
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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @daisy dmd. Hi Daisy thank you for the compliment, i appreciate it. Hmm thats a toughie, he could just be doing his job and very friendly.. on the other hand he could also like you. I would say if he is accommodating without you actually asking for help then there is a good chance he might be into you. I am not sure what you mean by the body language is there? What kind of body language is he giving you?

      He could be looking at you when you speak because he is attracted.. but does he look at everyone else when they speak? Its possible he hangs around your clinic to see you or be closer to you, its a possibility. So he has your number? If he has your number i am assuming that if he was interested by now he would ask you to hang out outside the clinic, that is my first thoughts. But he might also be trying to be professional.

      Personally i cannot tell from just this is if he is into you, there is nothing clear here for me that tells me that he is interested and i would say that if he really likes you he will eventually make a move on you. Beyond that I think your best bet is to get to know him better, try to converse more with him to feel out the situation better.. to ask if he wants to hang out sometime or to simply throw some more hints his way and see if he asks you out or tries to get your number. Good luck

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      Chrissie87 2 years ago

      Hey again Jay,

      Thanks again for all your help and advice. After hearing from you, and talking to friends again we all seem to be on the same page about him being a manipulative person. We all thought he was a great guy, and as time went on and we found out about the girlfriend and all his other chats with other coworkers his real personality seemed to come through. I think we were all fooled by him, mom also thought he seemed to be a good guy at first.

      My friend seems to agree with you in thinking he is just one of those guys who likes to play games and wants attention from everyone. Once it seemed like I liked him, I guess he got what he wanted and moved on.

      I didn't end up telling him how I felt actually. I never did write the note, or actually tell him. I thought it would be better if I didn't. I did just try to talk to him and hint more that I was interested rather than telling him, the few days after I heard about the girlfriend, but it didn't get me anywhere, and I just gave up. That's when I started hearing more things about him and realized he probably isn't a good guy anyway.

      It's true I will never really know why he did it all, and now I actually don't care. Everyone did believe he liked me, but after everything went down I think we all know what kind of person he really is and I don't want to be with someone like that anyhow. I hopefully wont have to see him much anymore and can move on.

      Thanks again for all your insight, and I will definitely be back if there is another guy, :)

    • Jay Rando profile image
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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @Chrissie87. Hi again Chrissie, really sorry to hear about how this turned out but at the very least please pat yourself on the back for at least trying. I get the feeling this has made you feel foolish but even if you do don't, in my opinion my guess is that he is likely a highly manipulative person through his flirting... I personally think he flirted with you to a degree in which was meant to play with your head and feelings.. even asking your mum if you are single he knew exactly what he was doing.. I do wonder what your mum said about his behavior.

      The only exception (highly doubt this) is if he was feeling sorry about you or something so felt like cheering you up through flirting and playfulness. Then again you dont ask someone if they have are single without an ulterior motive. In other words asking your mum if you are single was some kind of ploy in my opinion. There are people out there who love playing mind games and having everyone fawning over them, he might be one of those guys, one of those ones who gets annoyed or invalidated when he feels he cant have you..

      I personally would not have told him your feelings outright and rather had just thrown a stronger hint out there, putting your feelings on the table isn't necessary. If a guy's interested he will make a move especially if your giving strong hints.. those guys who seem a bit more flirty are the ones you are best leaving to ask you out. Now i am not saying its a bad thing you spilled your feelings.. at least you got it over and done with.. but in the future i would be more cautious as to avoid an unnecessary rejection.

      Of course you probably know that when i am reading comments here i am just giving my best guess based on the signs given.. this is why sometimes people like me who are reading your situation can get it wrong in the odd case. However if me and your friends/family think he liked you then you have a full team of people who were convinced it was worth going for.. what does that tell you? He could have been highly deceptive. He might have gotten his kicks out doing it.. or maybe not. We can't read his mind.. but these player types do exist.

      For me ALL flirting has a limit.. I give you a big pat on the back and a hug. I will leave it there, if you need advice again or meet another guy you like who you think may like you back please come here and i will help out in any way i can.. Remember that every experience even this one can be seen as a good thing in relation to learning new things going forward.. That way you feel better about it, you will never see the guy again, certainly that makes easier recovery and getting onto the next one. Best wishes

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      daisy dmd 2 years ago

      hi jay it was happen i have so many question in my mind, and i search that would help me a lot then i came up with article am glad it helped me since i really dont know what if a guy like me too,

      Am glad your article is really nice and am so interested, Can you tell me more? My situation is i loke this guy, He is our modir meaning our director in our clinic hes the one who taking care of all our needs in the clinic, i have notice ever since we talk he is always smiling at me asking me if i need anything just to start my clinic he is so nice and very accommodating what ever i need i talk to him, then change happen i notice that every time we talk about my work the body language is there but he never touch me bcoz i think its not in there culture they respect women here, the thing is why he always look at me when i talk and listen all my needs sometimes i notice him when is in the phone he always walking around my clinic i dont know why? but he never say a thing or even callme or txted me, I dont know if he likes me, pls help me am confuse jay, sometimes i really dont know some attitude of a guy really confusing i like him but i think he will never make a move..

      hoping we can really talk so i will know him and he will know me better...

      pls help... jay..

    • Jay Rando profile image
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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @Candy Queen. Hi there, mixed signals are often confusing, they can often be a sign someone is interested and someone isn't, however he does sound like he is definitely flirting with you. The little sister he never wanted..? I can see why that might hurt because it sounds like he is not happy with you being his little sister, having said that even though he says "never wanted" you have to look at the bigger picture.

      But let me be the bearer of good news here.. some guys may call you "sister" but in fact still think your attractive, i can see why you would associate that with being a bad thing but guys may use the word "sister" as to cover up their interest, for example i have a best friend who has liked this girl for years and he always said things like "shes like my little sister". I can tell you for sure he was definitely into her. Of course in your situation i cannot promise that this is the same, but like your friends i agree, dont read too much into it.

      Using nicknames for you is often a sign hes into you. I think he may be jealous about this other guy you talk to a lot which would also be a good sign, although he does sound a bit possessive if he dislikes the other guy talking to you. Another good sign is that you said he watches you and filming you. Him acting like your responsibility is a protective thing guys do when they like a girl but i think that it also depends on what else he does. I am not sure what you mean when you say "he's the only way for me to go".

      With that said MY overall opinion is that hes either into you and is too afraid to ask you out or hes a player.. when i read everything in your comment i would guess he is just a player stringing you a long. I am not 100% certain of it but i strongly believe if he saw you as someone worth dating and being with he would have made his move by now. i noticed you said later in your comment that you told him you liked him, he has not acted on that interest so what do you think that implies?

      For me it implies he is likely not interested.. or hes too afraid to date you for some reason. This is one of those cases where he shows many signs of interest but i think you need to see the bigger picture here, he has not bothered to ask you out. Players all have one thing in common, they wont date you but they wont let anyone else date you either. Him saying "you could never get a boyfriend if you tried" is a pretty mean thing to say, its really immature for a 20 year old to say.

      Then again i am not sure if he says that because he doesn't want you to date anyone else, personally if someone liked me and said that to me i wouldn't view them as a very caring person, i would not want to be with such a person. He doesn't need to tell you he does or doesn't like you because he enjoys playing with you but if he was into you he would have already taken advantage of the situation and asked you out. Don't you agree? I am sorry if this was not what you wished to hear but personally my guess is that any chance of him liking you is a small percentage. Your best bet is to go on living and see if he asks you out eventually.. Good luck

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      Chrissie87 2 years ago

      Hi Jay,

      So I have some bad news. This whole thing didn't really work out. I didn't check your response until now because this all sort of blew up in my face about two weeks ago and I was too sad to read your response. Every single person I have mentioned this whole thing to has said that he was definitely interested in me. So now that this whole thing has gone down I'm still confused, I don't know if I missed my window with him, or he was really just a compulsive flirt.

      So I definitely did try to show him I was more interested. Mom asked him if he liked me and he said yes and she told him that I did like him too. So the next week I was all ready to try and get more out of him, and I came in and got the cold shoulder. He basically didn't say much the first two days, he stopped calling me my dear, and there was no more singing. At break on Monday he sat down and was talking to the other guys about having his girlfriends parents over for dinner. I was so confused. One of the other guys asked him if he proposed to her yet. I couldn't even bare to look over at them talking. I was shocked. By the sounds of things it didn't seem like he just got a girlfriend over the weekend. He did apparently go to the casino for the weekend and mentioned how many pretty girls were there.

      He did finally chat a little more a few days later but it was as if nothing had happened the previous week. There was no more flirty banter. My coworker mentioned to me that he was talking about his girlfriend to her, and mentioned the girlfriend several times. My coworker also mentioned that he asked her about her kids and she mentioned she had two daughters and he said that she should tell them that she knows this very cute electrician from work. So, it seems to me and everyone else that he is just a compulsive flirt. Was he only trying to get me to like him for fun? If he did have a girlfriend all this time then why was he getting close to me, or did he make up the girlfriend because he is afraid of admitting how he actually felt for me?

      My friend suggested that I write him a note about how I felt because after telling her everything she thinks he was just playing me and I am really upset about this. I did fall for him, whether he ever really cared or not, I don't know. I, you and everyone else was convinced he liked me, and then he completely changed his tune. A few days later he changed shifts and now is working days at the building, so I don't see him as much anymore. I saw him one night when he came in to get something and he was with a girl, which I assume is his girlfriend, but I don't actually know for sure. Since he changed shifts he hasn't made any move to stay in contact. I was tempted to ask one of his coworkers about the girlfriend situation but I was afraid it would get back to him and if he was just playing me then I don't want him to know how much he made me like him. Everyone now just keeps telling me to get over him because he was a jerk, but I still don't know the truth and that's what is making me all sad. I don't know if this is my fault for not showing him that I like him more, even though I tried or if he just wanted someone to flirt with while at work. I don't think there is anything else I can do with the situation.

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      Candy Queen 2 years ago

      Hi um.... I need help. I know I'm not very good at seeing signs, but there's this guy who ha got me so confused by his mixed signals. Like I have never been very good at knowing what is flirting, but there are times I KNOW he's flirting with me, but then he turns around and calls me the "little sister he never wanted" This nickname kinda hurts because I figured it means he thinks of me like a sister (which is bad for obvious reasons), but my friend says to not read too much into a nickname cause he probably just likes the way it sounds (and the other nicknames he's used are flirting). Cause I know I'm bad at knowing signs I tend to ignore my friend and instead decide that he doesn't like me like that and it's wishful thinking, but I really can't explain some stuff. Like I text this guy I work with all the time, like every day, and while I have no interest in this other guy other then being friends my crush would get nasty about it some times. And my crush watches me, and he might have recorded a video of me learning back flips on a trampoline (which I'm proud of, but I didn't know he recorded it and some how his mother claimed to have seen it). I also don't really understand why, if he just thought of me as a sister, is he always acting like I'm his responsibility. Like I get that a brother would care about some things, but he says stuff like "I'm never taking you to a wedding" or "I'm never taking you to Europe" or places he thinks I shouldn't go cause I act a little silly sometimes. Like he says these things like he's the only way for me to go, or that he actually made decision about what we would do together (not that he's like set in stone). Like I don't ask if he'll take me, he just says it out of the blue. I get so confused by him, like one day we'll be flirting and wrestling, but then the next he calls me the little sister he never wanted and claims I couldn't get a BF if I tried. I am so lost and can't understand why a twenty year old guy is acting so unsure, he knows I like him (I sent him a text telling him months ago) so why can't he just tell me he does or doesn't like me instead of acting like he likes me and then calling me his sister

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @Chrissie87. Hi Chrissie. He does sound like he is trying to woo you in his own unique way, showing off is something men do a lot when they are want to get a woman's attention and basically display their worthiness. If he seems happy to see you, like you make his day brighter then it is typical attraction he is feeling in my opinion.

      Generally if he over heard something you said especially when he was busy doing something else i'd say that's another good sign hes into you, i think his comment about men's working hands is definite flirtation, quite funny that one liner.

      I think he may think you don't like him though.. one worded answers and shaking your head may by him be perceived that your not interested. Truthfully guys can be clueless at times.. look at him, he went to your mum to find out if you like him or not! I mean how much more does he need to care about what you think about him?

      He is in my opinion afraid you don't like him back.. that's why he dropped it by your mum.. i think the way you come across to him may be making him feel your not interested so please do behave more interested in him or at the very least get your mum to tell him that you don't dislike him. To me it sounds like he is not brave enough to ask you out.. perhaps you are not giving him enough signs for him to make a move on you.

      And well.. the comment about having a boyfriend.. it was written in stone the moment i read that part.. hes into you.. of course there is chance he could be asking because one of his friends likes you but no i doubt that.. i think its him.. hes so see through its unbelievable. Like i said he wont ask you because hes scared you will reject him, this is why advise showing more interest in him, help the guy out.

      Seriously i'm like 100% sure hes into you. You know the answer, you just don't want to believe it is true.. or rather you don't believe a guy like him could like you... he does, hes waiting for you. I really hope something came of this.. and if he is still around you still have a chance.. but unfortunately it sounds like he would ask you out only if you make it more obvious your own interest.

      Trust me i've always felt having a good impression on your crushes mother is the best way to getting closer to a girl you like.. to me that sounds like what he is doing. Perhaps you should get your mum to tell him to ask you out if he likes you.. or something along those lines. Anyway i hope things happen for you.. Good luck

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      Chrissie87 2 years ago

      I have a question. This guy came to work at the office building I work in, (He's there as an electrician working with a crew of sheet metal workers, and I'm on the cleaning staff) lately he seems like he's flirting a lot. I read your article and noticed that he has done a few things listed on here. A few weeks ago I caught him staring several times. He finally came over to talk to me, but I got nervous and only gave him one word answers, and he seemed to back off a bit, but lately he has been more chatty, and he tries to sing to me (he has made up a song he sings when he sees me.) He has been talking about himself, like he is trying to show off and get my attention. He started high fiving me a few weeks ago, which doesn't exactly scream be my girlfriend, unless that is his way of touching me and getting close. He does seem really attentive sometimes. One night I had the worst headache and he heard me mention it to someone else I was working with, and later on that night her and I were laughing and he walked right up to me and looked me in the eye and asked if I was feeling better, and he really looked like he was concerned. Although, then he went to high five me again, and I jokingly said I wouldn't because his hands were dirty, but they weren't really, and his response was that "some girls like mens working hands".

      He has asked some personal questions, although not all of them have been to me. I work with my mom, so a few times he has asked her questions, possibly thinking that it's a good idea that she likes him. On Friday he wasn't supposed to be at work, and when he showed up I was caught off guard. I try to look my best when he's around, but I didn't on Friday, but he was still very talkative. He started singing my song when I saw him and I shook my head like I always do, and he asked why I do that ( I think he's ridiculous in an adorable way. plus I don't know what to say to him) But he said to my mom that he thinks I don't like him. (But I DO!) I found out after we left work that he had apparently asked my mom whether or not I have a boyfriend, and she told him no. She said he didn't really respond to her but he did ask her if I would ever go on a motorcycle (which he drove to work that night, and he told me that he did it just for me. ) I don't know whether he is being nosy by asking questions or because he is interested. Why wouldn't he ask me himself? Is he asking her because he thinks I don't like him, and he's trying to find something I like to talk to me about possibly? I'm not sure if he's trying to get closer now, since I know his job is almost done, and he will be leaving soon. So I'm not really sure what to do with all this. My other issue is that I don't even think he knows my name. He just addresses me as "my dear". I know his name, but it has never come up while we have been chatting.

      I keep thinking about all the possibilities that this stuff means. I don't know if he is being nice because I'm around and it's just polite, or if he's flirting, just because he's a flirty person. I'm not sure if he's trying to get me to like him because it seems like I don't like him and it bothers him that someone doesn't like him, or if he really is interested and just doesn't know how to say it. Possibly because my mom is around. I'm 27, so it's not like I need her permission to go out with him if he does ask. What should I do?

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @jojojoannnaaaa. If he cannot love you for you then he is not worth dating otherwise you will always cater to what the other person wants.. to me it sounds like he prefers extroverted women, however i say to you to definitely take pride in being an introvert, its not a weakness. Being an introvert or extrovert isn't something we consciously choose to be.. you're either one or the other.. or somewhere in between both.. the only thing you can do to make such a relationship work is to both come halfway with each other if you do end up dating, in other words he should not expect you to socialize all the time. I think its really shallow that he doesn't like introverts but surely things will change the more he gets to see introverts aren't all that bad.

      The teasing about the fat thing sounds like hes into you. I think calling you beautiful and being flirty is a sign hes into you as well.. hes very protective of you and the initials on the hand thing is obvious. I'd say say hes surely into you but I'd wait for him to ask you out.. as to your questions regarding he only wants the looms? Do you mean sexual intercourse? I really couldn't tell you that, you may know that better than i do.. i think your best bet is to take things slowly, if he is pushy and starts to want sex with you much too early then yes he only cares about what he's getting out of the situation. But i haven't seen anything from your comment that suggests he is just after that..

      Thanks for the compliment on the article. Feel free to come back if you need more advice. I wish you luck :)

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      jojojoannnaaaa 2 years ago

      Hey

      this guy i knew for 2 years now has started to show ibterest. The thing was before i shifted here we just go to know each other like a month or 2 before i came here and hed call me beautiful and stuff...but then later when i saw me in real he was a bit disappointed coz (a) i dint look the way he expected me to look and (b) turns out i wasn't as social as he thought u was..im ectrenneely introverted. He doesn't really like introverted people...but he still spoke to me....hed tease me calling me fat and stuff..im not really that fat..i told him i felt bad and he apologised. Later i made it a point to socialise more with him and his fruends....that's when he started asking me questions about my datung life...after a year of knowing each other...now he asks. He asked when was the last time i dated someone and if i could date anyone....then the other day he saw pictures of me at a party. I dressed up reall goood that day. He saw rhe pics and said i looked the most beautiful hed ever seen me ever. And ever since then hes gotten all flirty and extra close...things like walking near small boys playing (whuch could lead to me getting i jured) he pushed me away and put himself near them so id be out of their reach..so they wouldn't hurt me. The. Every time id get hurt even a tiny jolt hed ask me if i was okay.....is this guy real?? Hes always had this thing where hed date soneone perfect..only when he finds the perfect girlll...and i haven't seen him blush for a girl until today.....me....and i saw his hand too it had both our initials and a heart.

      is he an ass who cares about the looms or the realll deal?

      thanks

      great article

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @Prince Bethel. Thanks for the compliment and the ratings (if you gave them lol). It is indeed hard to let go of someone you love.. its once we realize its OK to do so.. or that it is best for us when we feel ok doing it more consistently. I personally think that a person should never let a faith come between love.. if you really and truly need to have someone love you who is of similar faith then you will need to find the kind of places where these people with the same/similar faith hang out.. but as i said sometimes we can be limited if we let faith dictate who we can and can't date, keep an open mind to that. Why is it so important that you find someone of the same faith? To me love is love.. a faith cannot come between loving someone and i will never force someone to have the same faith as me, if there arent many people with the same faith then it really comes down to whether you are ok with putting faith second to your happiness, sometimes that must be done.. Good luck

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @shahsadah. Hi there and thanks. Can you tell me why you did not like it? I always welcome criticism.. but would like to know specifically what you did not like about it.. Feel free to tell me what it is your not keen on in the article, in the end it helps me and everyone else here for sure. Cheers

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @Ashlet. I noticed you come back for more help so i wrote a longer comment :) So do you feel nothing will happen because hes not the forward type? Is he shy etc? I think in today's age if you want something you should go for it.. most of us in the beginning are not confident at reading the opposite sex or our love interests, i see many people that are reading someone correctly and many that are taking very minor signs and turning them into something bigger than they actually are. If you don't know which of those two relate to you then the best bet is just to ask him if he fancies hanging out, a lot of people tend to think they must either say "i like you and have feelings for you" or "i want to ask you on a date".

      You don't need to do either of those.. image you just made a new friend (female friend for example) and you said "hey do you fancy doing something this weekend?".. i can bet you that isn't hard really is it? is it hard to ask any of your friends, sisters, brothers or relatives that question? Of course not.. so why is is to hard when it comes to your crushes? The answer is that you are putting pressure on yourself to say and do the right thing in his presence because of this obsession you have over him and the signals he has been giving.

      So skip asking him out in the traditional way, simply say "hey do you fancy hanging out sometime?".. and you will have your answer, notice how you don't show you are clearly interested by saying that? And yet you make it clear you think hes interesting enough to hang out with. If you can get him alone you will probably have a better idea of whether hes into you. I have known many girls down the years who would pretend not to see a guy because they didn't know what to say or simply to get the guy to come to them which makes me laugh because its crazy but cute.. lots of guys in that situation read it as HER ignoring him because she dislikes him or thinks little of him haha.

      In speaking to him you need to find things that you both can relate to, if you can find those things then speaking to him will be much more easier, you don't need to even talk to him a lot, simply say hi or ask him how he is doing and other simple questions. That way you kind of drop hints he is likable and worth talking to and he might then consider coming to you to ask you questions. How do the two of you relate? School? Work? What studies do you share? What homework do you share? What hobbies or interests do you share? These are you talking points.

      If he was your brother, sister or a friend how would you speak to them? Why can't you speak to him like you do to them? Don't get me wrong, i know its tough, i was in your spot years ago.. but at some point you must become more forward, the more time you spend thinking about him and these signals the more pressure you put on yourself. If you choose not to go for it that is also up to you but i think people tend to make a mountain out of a molehill when all they really have to do is PRETEND that they are not their crush, when you speak to him don't speak to him in a way where you think you must come away with something, just practice speaking to him first, you will feel less pressure this way and your confidence will build over time in speaking to him. Good luck

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @leena. Your right it could be to make the friend jealous. However if that isn't the case perhaps he is just seeking comfort, maybe he is hurt over the rejection from the other gal? Its hard to say, he could really like you or just be using you to make her jealous.. i cannot tell which just from your comment so i would advise just looking out for signs to see if he really is playing games. But what i do not understand is that you said you hope he does not like you? Do you not like this guy? Were you just curious of whether he was into you? I do think avoiding him is probably the best bet.. maybe NOT completely but if you feel hes doing it to make the other girl jealous then yes i agree with not getting caught up in that.. If the guy actually DOES want you more than HER (and you like him back) i think he will try harder personally, if he is airing his relationship with you and mentioning it to everyone and showing off then yes the likelihood is that there is an ulterior motive, am sure you know what that means. Good luck

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @zimelle. Well you bond well and your friends think he likes you..But you say you feel hes into you too.. All good.. I'd like to say hes into you, perhaps he has a good reason for not saving it.. if he however has your number and hasn't used it then he might simply not be interested.. but i get some feeling he hasn't actually got your number or something is a miss here.. i feel like some important information is missing here or your not telling me everything. I would like to say he likes you because it certainly does sound it by the blushing and being really happy around you.. i hope that is the case and he asks you out soon.. or perhaps you could ask him out? It is 2015 after all! :) Keep me posted. Good luck

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      prince bethel 2 years ago from Africa

      Great hub, I find it interesting, awesome, and beautiful. Enjoyed reading it. I find it hard most of the time to let go of someone I love, except something strange and unusual happens. Now if I come to love a girl deeply, and later i come to find out that my faith and hers are different, what happens? What step am I supposed to take to make it work? Because letting go of someone your heart has already accepted will create a long lasting ache in your life, which no guy like me will never like to experience.

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      shahsadah 2 years ago

      this article was good but i don't like it

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      Ashlet 2 years ago

      Hey I asked you for advice a couple of months ago, I don't know if you remember (probably not as you probably have much more important things to remember). Whether you do or not is unimportant, as I decided to come back for more advice.

      I've been spending more time with my crush in a 'friends' setting and I think he does like me, which is great, but also it seems as if nothing will ever happen between us if I don't do something. But at the same time I'm too scared I'm reading the signals wrong to actually do try anything. Like everything I think is him flirting I end up over thinking and convincing myself it's just an accident or coincidence or I'm reading to much into it.

      And I've gotten really annoyed with myself for being too much of a chicken to just ask him out, or even drop anything real hints. I feel pathetic every time I see him somewhere and I can't think of anything to say to start a conversation so I just pretend not to see him.

      I think the worst part is it's not like nothing is happening, so I can't force myself to get over him. But at the same time I'm not sure what's happening and it's happening so so so slowly, that I spend much more time wondering whether he actually is looking AT me or just TOWARD me

      No rush on replies, and thanks for any advice.

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      leena 2 years ago

      Hey...i have quite a common issuse...my guy best friend liked my bestfriend n used to hang out a lot with her and texted her like everyday and then finally asked her out but she said they were just good friends...after that he started hanging out with me not very often but ya usually and texts me everyday...i took it quite normally as i thought he was hanging with me to make my friend jealous and i played along cuz he thinks that my friend does like him but rejected him cuz shes not into dating...now the thing is that my friends think that he started liking me now and is using the 'to make her jealous' reason just to stay around me..i think this is nonsense as we're just bestfriends but this has lead me think that maybe they're right or maybe not...im just hoping he doesn't like me as i think my friend has started liking him now and i do not want to be the cause of any kind of rift...also im kind of avoiding him now...not to much but just a little...please tell me what u think..

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      zimelle 2 years ago

      Hey jay...there's this guy whom i met through a friend..we meet often...although we met not very long ago we bond quite well...my friends hav noticed his behaviour and hav told me that he likes me...after hearing this i paid close attention to his behaviour and i too felt that maybe he likes me...although we don't talk much on chat he seems really happy around me and this makes me think that he likes me a lot...now here's the trouble..it's been a while and he hasn't asked me out yet..and im curious as to why he hasn't..one more thing he doesn't hav my number although i texted him n we chat somethimes..he hasn't saved my number yet...and whenever we meet up his friend tells me that he (the guy who likes me) wants my number and he says it in front of that guy and he (my guy)says i was hoping my friend would help me get it(my number) n he blushes when he says this...i wonder why he hasn't saved it yet as i hav messaged him a couple of times....please tell me what's going on..

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @erorantes. Hey there and thanks for the compliment; feedback and compliments are always welcome :) Love is an awesome thing, i think what i like most is that i get to advise people who come to this page and helping them or putting them in the right direction is always fun and enjoyable for me. If i can help i can and i will.. i think the most important thing you can get from this is that its so so important to get a good grasp of reading people not just as a way of finding out if someone likes you but to also understand what level their interest is currently at as well.. Cheers

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      Deborah Demander 2 years ago from First Wyoming, then THE WORLD

      I just got friend zoned. Dang it.

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @Sachin Thakral. You have a point, asking for a number is a weaker sign or one that doesn't always translate to liking romantically.. however i must say that this signal was not written by me personally but my editor who added it to the list. Personally i might edit/change that point up at a later date as i don't fully agree with it 100% either.. however the rest on the list are all good signals. I could however address that asking for a number could mean more if the guy is shy or rarely asks for peoples numbers, in that case we could say the signal makes more sense. Either way thanks for the suggestion. Cheers

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      Ana Maria Orantes 2 years ago from Miami Florida

      I like your article. The pictures and your writing makes sense. It is a fact. Men who likes a women behave the way you are describing in the article's scenario. It is a beautiful feeling when both the men and women like each other. They can have the best time of their life. Any place or any activity. Thank you for writing a beautiful romantic hub mister jayrando.

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      Sachin Thakral 2 years ago

      I don't think asking for a phone number is that mean,he is interested in you. Many friends of mine ask for a number. But non of them show any interest in me.give little gifts is also a. sign of get your work from her.

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @jessica. It is hard to be in this position, no doubt. Your hoping he likes you more than her and that him going for you meant he would never go back to his ex, now your having a hard time accepting that he went back because you thought he would be all yours.. the fact he has gone back to the ex is a sign he obv likes her more.. that is indeed the harsh truth, if he wanted to be with you he would be with you right this minute and the ex would be his permanent past! He is having his cake and eating it.. and you are wanting what you can't have (him!). Obviously he finds you attractive as he hooked up with you but just because someone finds you attractive doesn't mean he perceives you as the 'most attractive'.

      You need to look elsewhere and not be this person on the side, you deserve better than that.. you could be waiting for a chance with him that never comes, your time would be best spent moving on and getting over this guy. If he does want to give it another go he knows where to find you.. in the mean time there are so many other guys out there who can give you the kind of relationship you want. Don't settle for scraps, find a guy who will choose 'you' and not someone who will put you on the side as a backup and play head games with you, if he wants you he will make it known clearly and directly, otherwise ignore the signs as he can only take advantage of knowing that you like him.. Good luck

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @candy love. Like i said before i reckon hes into you, i don't have any doubts. His leg shaking is likely nervousness unless hes doing it to keep his leg warm.. but as you said hes doing it only when your around so hes likely nervous. He is looking at you probably as to see if you are looking back to see if you interested in him too.. or he simply admires how you look and admires you as a person and can't keep his eyes off you. In the end it really comes down to who he likes more.. its him who is going to make the decision on who hes like best. Let's wait n see. Some people can like more than one person at a time. I think your best bet is to get to know him a bit more as that might make the difference.

      Your friend could be lying, she might be into him herself so wants to pretend you don't have chance with him.. or she could be telling the truth... BUT i think more importantly is that HE might like you and the other girl at the same time, this is always possible! You have to remember that some people can be very competitive so its likely that some of the girls who like that guy that you are friends with probably want to pretend he likes them more etc.. i don't want to tint anyone here with a bad brush but sometimes people can be in it all for themselves. Good luck

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @chandigarh calling. Thanks for the comment :) I agree with you.. shy guys will rarely make the first move, their lack of self-confidence in themselves holds them back so much around gals they like. I like what you said too about guys like a girl that feel for them.. i think guys can be really clueless as well and sometimes just getting a few more hints might make him feel more comfortable to approach.. i definitely think shy people will feel more comfortable talking to their crush in person once they have spoken to them a bit online as well. Cheers

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      jessica 2 years ago

      Hi jay...

      Theres this guy who was my ex crush...recently he broke up with his girlfriend and we be began a friends with benefits relationship which included everything besides sex..now we've stopped with the friends with benefits cuz he made up with his girlfriend but ive fallen for him again n can't tell him cuz he mentioned that I shouldn't fall for him during this relationship..but here's where the problem starts wheneber we're with our friends he keeps giving me these intense looks which only someone in love would do..although I like the way he looks at me im confused because if he doesn't like me then why does he look at me this way??and if he does like me then why is he still dating her?? I have no idea what's going on...please help!

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      candy love 2 years ago

      thanks but when i sit next to him he starts to shake his leg you know how you do when you get nervous but it is every time.. he doesn't do that with other people or girls so i'm like do i smell which i shouldn't 'im clean like what is it and we have to turn around to see the board and when we watch videos i can feel him and see him looking at me.. but my friend said that he likes another girl but i don't think that is true because he is not a shy person he is outspoken and when he is around that girl she said he likes he is not nervous scared and he didn't even ask her out yet i see him tomorrow i will see what happens... and the girl that she said he likes likes him too and she is my friend... so i don't know what to do

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @candy love. Staring is usually always a good sign.. hes either staring because he likes you or because hes purposely trying to freak you out.. my thinking is the former.. if he keeps appearing where you are then its a good sign too, people tend to hang out in places where their crush is so anytime he is close to you or hanging in the same places then he wants to get closer to you without making it too obvious that hes into you.

      Right now all it takes is one of you to break the ice.. possibly he is scared to ask you out so all i can recommend here is to drop some hints and he might be more confident in approaching and talking to you. What i do know is that it is highly likely he is into you and i think it would be worth talking to him and see how he acts when he is speaking to you. Good luck

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @liss. If you always catch him looking at you he probably likes you, after all we don't always look at something we don't like right? :) I think that unless your wearing something or doing something that stands out too much then yes hes into you, you appeal to him in some way.. The fact he started talking to you I'd say he likes you. He probably just needs to get to know you a bit more before asking you out.. :) Good luck

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @liveinthemoment26. Him trying to outdo you is possibly just his way of indirectly flirting with you. Your mum might be correct.. however i would wonder why he is insults you, what kind of insults are you getting? Are they really insults? It seems a little odd that he acts like your friend sometimes then not. How often are you looking at him? Does he feel uncomfortable when you look at him? I can only that you should see how things pan out over time, its possible he has feelings for you but I'd need to know a bit more, it may also be that he doesn't like you and just doesn't like something about you (there is that possibility). But if you get anymore signs feel free to let me know, then i will have a clearer picture :) Good luck

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      chandigarh calling 2 years ago

      shy guys are just like that. they always feel hesitant to initiate first move. some times girls make very serious face when the guy would be bit more nervous or scared. in case u are having serious crush over the guy there are so many methods like telephone or internet through which u can share or contact with the guy. from my personal point of view, guys always look fro girl who feel for them. Some time signals are not so loud and clear and are mixed signals. so take my advice and be bold enough to face the guy. in case he sees you just give glaze and see through his eyes with gentle smile.

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @Christina. You need to make a decision and stick to one.. one minute your deciding your moving on then another your not moving on.. make a decision and stick to it, stop messing around.. All this going back and forth makes it seem like you have little options in your life, you don't date other men? Why not? There are plenty of men who think more of you than just someone to have sex with.

      Going by your comment it is obvious you want more than sex, you want a serious long term relationship.. obviously this guy cannot give you that and your trying to constantly negotiate with him to get him to give you what you want and YET in 5 years time you could STILL be here negotiating a deal.. Next he will be telling you to remain single for the rest of your life so you can save yourself for him. Focus on another man who can give you what you want.. From my point of view your just wanting to do the benefit thing because you hope it will lead to something more (no it wont make the relationship stronger)..

      He's already told you where he stands on it and gave you a vital clue by saying he will only give physical benefits.. he can travel all that way to have sex but no relationship? Sounds like complete BS to me! This isn't love.. IF you can travel all that way for sex then you can travel all that way for a RS! Not to mention one minute he just wants sex and then another he doesn't.. the last thing he would want to do is meet you for sex if he loved you..

      Stop putting your life on hold for this guy and go date someone closer to home, you are too entranced in this fairy tale love romance because you have no other guys you are interested in so you remain focused on this one guy who gives you some attention.. Unless you both can agree to live within distance of each other and both agree to a proper RS soon then you will you be given the short end of the stick option, that is either wait around forever to be nearer to each other or have him not allow you to move on and date other guys. Even if he does like you back its pointless.. nothing is going anywhere here.. Good luck

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      candy love 2 years ago

      there is this guy that ive liked for some time now and when he sees me all he does is stare, it gets really uncomfy and every time i walk passed him he just stares... sometimes he is always near me like when im there he is just randomly there too idk but there is this new guy he like no words he just very very pretty lol he hasn't noticed me yet i try to walk in his path or something doesn't work but anyway please help thank you

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @Talitha. Hi there.. We all have our own preferences so i think its fine.. i think his teasing and touching you is his way of flirting so that's a good sign. His compliment was also a good sign. The breakup might have been hard on him or perhaps it was awkward after the breakup, sometimes some people simply don't want to talk to their exes or exes friends after a split for a good while so perhaps that is why he did this.

      If he is not over his ex perhaps let him get over her first.. perhaps he does like you but is still processing his feelings and getting over the other girl. If he is interested he will be back i'm sure, give him some space for a while, if you want to you can always let him know your there if you need him but personally he is probably avoiding all of you until he is over the breakup. If however he did the dumping then that would be confusing, he probably just feels awkward.

      I would not be too mad at him unless hes ignoring you as he walks past you.. but admittedly most people do ignore their exes after breakups including their friends, its usually just one way of dealing with it i suppose.. but like i said give him a chance, hes probably very hurt or feeling awkward about it. I would also say there is a very big difference between ignoring someone in person and over phone/internet. The latter isn't as bad, the former is kind of rude. You could also confront him calmly and just ask him why he has not been speaking as much and ask him if he wants to hang out some time. Good luck

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      liss 2 years ago

      Look I need help there's a cute boy in my class I always catch him looking at me and today he kinda talked to me what does this mean

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @janice. Janice just to clarify when you say you're in love do you mean the guy who didn't give any signals? If you have showed him you like and you were obvious about it then i am surprised he has not made a move, but the fact he is distancing himself isn't a great sign. Why do you not talk anymore? I think you need to get to the bottom of why this is.. however if he doesn't know you're into him then whether you tell him or show him is up to you, he might not think your into him or maybe he does but he moved on? Hard to say..

      Does he make any effort with you? Why has your friendship become less? I will need to know more about this to really form a view of what has happened.. why don't you just make the effort to talk to him and see if he makes the same effort back? for all i know he could think you have been avoiding him and feels you don't like him.. or it could be the opposite way around, perhaps there is a reason he stopped talking to you as much. Try talking to him and see if he tries to keep your friendship going. Good luck

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      Jay Rando 2 years ago from England

      @puppylover. I am not sure what you meant by your comments but i think a "i love you too" can mean something but its not enough to really go off.. he could just be being friendly, i would check for other signals. But it seems you know hes into the other gender now so perhaps you have the conclusion you were hoping for? Feel free to come back anytime you need any advice on a new guy you might like. Good luck

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      christina 2 years ago

      Heylo.

      Im back again!..soo he decided to not shift to another country but he did consider it. This guy says hes a virgin but he has this way of flirting with girls and talking dirty to me quite nayurally...soo i kinda doubt the "im a virgin" part..we have had many fights recently..i confessed that ive fallen in love with jim and he said he was getting there too as he spoke to me a lot. More than anyone. Sooo there were times where i wud tell him i needed to stay away from him coz i needed to get over him. He said he wouldn't allow me to do that. He said he would never allow me to forget him. He wants me to like him forwver. (I seriously don't get that!! Help me out?) And then i ask if hes gonna do this until his feelings go aaay and he said his feelings for me would never ever go away. He said we couldn't datr coz wed be able to meet only once a year. So he said he would like us to have our "benefits" as that's what we both really want. I guess that happens when a girl loves a guy ryte? She wants to give him her all. Now i know he may sound and look like a player but here's the catch. Ive fought bout wanting more and doing it with him wud make me want him even more..hence i wudnt be able to do it. He agreed to it but asked if qe could at least make out...now this has been the 15th tine we gought in 3 months bout the SAME THING. And hes still there hes patient..understanding and he hasn't backed out or left. I askd him why he wouldn't let me go he said he liked me too much to let me go away. But then afain hed bring up the physical relationship with "no emotional feelings involved" topic again and it confuses me so i had said yes last time and mentioned im ginna stop liking him after two years and he said he wouldn't let me... he also said if i did stop loving him we wud eventually stop talking and he dint want that. We video chatted a week ago and he wants to again. Even though we fought and eventhougj i was incredibly rude and insulting to him. He said he wanted to see me and he missed me a lot! I dont get it..does he have feelings? When i ask him if its just physical and nothing more? He says onbiously not just physical. Soo what is it then?? Pleaase help! Thanks in advance!! Ps he also says he only wants to do it with ME!!

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @Cici. I am sorry to hear about your situation with this guy.. buy perhaps you dodged the wrong type of guy though in the end. I don't know if im reading right but it sounds like he still liked his ex and didn't want you to know.. possibly didn't want to hurt your feelings so he pretended nothing was happening with his ex. NEVER focus your time on guys like this one.. i understand its easy to get sucked into liking guys but i think you have learnt a lot from this situation so next time you will be extra cautious and not let yourself get as involved again as you did with this guy.

      I cannot really give you any advice other than to focus on guys who will be more mature and up front about what they want.. But i think focusing on your studies is more important anyway.. guys aren't the journey.. guys come and go on the journey.. Its possible he might try to make it up to you somehow but i would not willingly take it back so easy. There are also plenty of other guys out there worth it compared to this guy. Good luck

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @Ashlet. This might require you to look over the room at him and make sure he catches your glance so he knows you are like looking at him (this is your.. i'm watching you and liking you type look). He should catch on that your into him. If catching his eye often doesn't work then you will either have to get out of your comfort zone and speak to him yourself or give up. Life is too short to let these chances pass but hopefully he will ask you out at some point.

      He might be showing off to get you to like him.. his way of impressing you.. men often do a lot of showing off, bragging or trying to impress you type behaviors in their younger years. I cannot see why he would tell you and no one else unless he likes you and wants to impress you.. if you TWO have always been friends then it might just be your closer to him than anyone else.. The fact he agrees with you almost always or helps with things your having trouble with is generally a good sign he likes you..

      i would try doing something such as asking him if he could help you with some homework after school or something (if hes that into you he will stay behind, sacrifice his time and help you). Of course you could also ask if he wants to hang out sometime or go see a movie, its not like your directly asking him for a date so if he says no to hanging out then at least you know where you stand with this.

      The times he watches you struggle may just be because hes waiting for you to ask him for help.. His sarcasm might just be his way of flirting, his not allowing you to play with his sword might just be his way of getting your attention and singling you out.. personally i could see him doing that because he wants to make you think "why can i not play with the sword!?". He gets you thinking about him.

      There is a great chance he likes you but i cannot be 100% certain.. i do wonder if his friends don't like you he may be treating you differently because of that but like i said i think its more likely he likes you.. Watching YOU when your not looking 90% of the time means he likes you.. hes just afraid to admit his feelings.. hes not shy around other girls probably because he likes you, think about it :)

      PS: you are not bothering me.. i am just very busy these days.. so comments may have weeks or even months between them.. I appreciate the compliment though, thank you.. be sure to come back if you need any more advice. Good luck

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      liveinthemoment26 3 years ago

      Ok, me and guy play the same sport and I see him about once or twice a werk. Him and I are always trying to outdo each other in whatever we are doing. Some days when I talk to him he is nice and we talk for a long time, but other times when I talk to him he is mean and insults me (mostly). Sometimes I catch him looking at me (when Im trying to look at him) and sometimes he just glares at me. My mom thinks we like each other (howd she guess I like him?) . Does he like me? And how can I become better friends with him?

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      Christina 3 years ago

      So me and this guy have been friends for over two years now. I had a major crush on him and he admitted to liking me too. But he had a gf at that time. We did go for a few hangouts and we kissed many times. Yes, i noe it wasn't a good move and we both feel extreemely guilty for what we did. I soon had to move to another country. He then admitted to really liking me a lot and soon our conversation took a physical turn. It turned into sexting and we'd talk for hours and hours. Not a single day has gone by without us talking to each other. he then said he wanted a physical relationship with me as dating was impossible as we were miles away. I agreed to the dating part but not to the physical part. I confronted him about him having a gf and why he would do something like that if he loved her. He said he dint actually love her, feelings were fading away and they were having terrible fights and their relationship just wasn't going anywhere. We had a few rough patches in the middle where i would stop talking to him for 1-2 days max and hes mssg me asking me what was wrong (ps- i did that coz i needed to get over him) He said he would never allow me to stop talking to him and he dint want me to lose my feelings for him. he later said that his feelings were love and lust. He's a virgin ..20...So finally i said i dint wanna like him anymore so we decided to had a Friends with benefits kinda thing. but swore it wouldnt effect our friendship. Just recently he told me hes planning to shift to another country which is just an hour away from the country i live in. I asked him if he was ready to leave his girlfriend and everyone else there. he said yes because i want you. (me)

      My question here is...his intentions are purely physical i get that..but would a guy move to another country just to pursue a Friends with benefits relationship?? he said if he does move he would meet me twice a month. That's the reason he wanted to move. I don't get it. All this just for a Friends with benefits thing??

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      Talitha 3 years ago

      Also, I'm a blackie!!!!!!! And I would like to know if it's okay that I don't seek a relationship with any other "blackies" lol this is my list

      ASAIN

      AUSTRALIANS

      HISPANICS

      CAUCASIANS

      MIXED RACES

      Lol I loooooovve my top three =D

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      Talitha 3 years ago

      Omg so like me and this guy Gerardo were like best friends and we go to school and church together. So we are very close and all that you could easily spot us chatting or him attempting to make me( I'm not ticklish) but anyway we would be on my phone playing games or he'd be insulting all my contacts on my phone. He was the nicest cutest sweetest crush I've ever had, but he was also the teasing type who would punch me or pull my hair and I remember this one time where he had complimented me by saying, " you look nice today" anyway we were basically inseparable I mean if he was at my house we would be laying on the sofa watching powerpuff girls together. He is supposed to be one grade ahead of me but in seventh grade he failed so now he is going to eighth while I'm starting high school, but while I was in eighth grade he dated my friend( which I didn't have a problem with) and when they broke up he stopped talking to me, her, and another friend of mine he had dated and he hardly comes to church although I see his mom. I'm just really confused because now I'm pretty sure he had likED me and now I feel all regretful and stuff and so I'm not even sure if there's a chance anymore especially with us going to separate schools and him hardly coming to church but I'm mad because he doesn't give a reason for him to ignore. I mean he can go ahead and ignore me but before you do tht please tell me why. Please help me

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      janice 3 years ago

      Me n this guy were inseperable best friends..but he secretly had a soft corner for me n never told me while i was into someone else...he never even gav me any signs..then i liked him n he ws cool with it when i told him but we never dated n now i think im in love with him n am not sure if hes into me but we barely talk now so i don't know how to let him know or find out if hes got someone in his life...plz help n tel me wat u think...

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      puppylover 3 years ago

      nevermind he is funny...like u know...no interested in girls....but the other gender

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      puppylover 3 years ago

      okay so this guy and i started to txt like a day ago and i said love ya and he said love u 2. i don't like him like i mean i like him just not that way(he is cute though). does you you mean something diff than ya

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @Miranda. I think the guy is disrespectful of his GFs feelings for going behind her back with you with intentions of trying to get with you. He is playing the both of you.. that isn't to say he doesn't want a real relationship with you but the guy is predictable and he knows what he is doing.. I think he either wants to stay in touch for possible relationship with you or he just wanted to see if he could get some sex or something before he moved house/place whatever.

      I personally think hes looking for your approval on whether he can date you or not so he can leave his current relationship.. its not a good way of teaching someone to respect you (or his gf for that matter) by letting him do this stuff to you.. And C'mon you know he likes you, its just whether that liking you is real interest or just sexual interest. I think he may genuinely like you and want a proper relationship but I would need more info on what else he does.

      Like i said I can't tell if he is in it just for sex or not but this may his way of telling you he wants you more than his GF (can't really give you a definite though).. And yes its likely an ego boost to know some guy who has a GF already likes you but imo its time to move on from this and seek guys you do like.. now unless you secretly really do like him and want him to leave his GF for you then the only thing you could do is get his contact details to stay in touch.. Good luck

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      Cici 3 years ago

      I Know school is almost over and all. But this week i was walking up the stairs that i usually walk up to, too get to stairs to get to 6th period and i was walking and i saw E and his ex girlfriend doing what E usually does to me holding her hand and grabbing her and stuff and when i was walking to the top stairs i took a quick glance at them and ignored what was going on but i did notice E was staring at me and when he saw me he quickly let go of her hand and left the staircase and i was right behind him cause i was already about to leave and we're walking right next to each other and he just basically ignored me till he got to his class.

      On that moment I FELT LIKE A REAL DUMBASS idk why i guess for believing that he wasn't an ass that just wanted my attention or that i had a chance tbh i just really don't know anymore i just feel so stupid wasting half of my 8t grade year playing a game with a 7th grader i shoulda jus sticked to my own grade like really i jus been sucked into his game and he coulda at least explained something about or break the tension by saing hi or something but he didn't.

      That's why a couple days later i was taking the usual steps to 6th period and he was trying to talk to me nd i jus kept it short by not really saying anything to him and most likely i probably had him guessing why she not tlking to me or sum.

      Anyway can i please have some advice on this please. Thank you

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @Cici. No worries. You have to remember that guys his age (or emotional maturity) are probably just trying to see how many girlfriends they can get.. i think that he likely finds you attractive but then it wouldn't surprise me who else he finds attractive. I think he is just trying to improve his skills or conquests really.. he has very sexual attitude towards you so while i am sure he likes you he may also just be trying to see who will fall for him. I think that your best bet is to talk to him when you get chance and see what his real deal is.. at some point he needs to man up and just tell you what he wants from you or at least show it.

      I know one thing: a guy would not kiss girls he thought were unattractive nor would he touch them.. well unless he was trying to make another girl jealous. I think he needs to be more up front with you though.. I think going by this you are just enjoying his attention but truthfully he is sounds like either a game player or someone who likes to have lots of options and cop a feel. It is also likely he just wants sex if he is always touching you inappropriately or looking at your boobs, after all its been all this time and he still hasn't asked you to hang out at the weekend or anything. If he doodles his exes name my opinion is that hes not completely over her, he may still like her. Unfortunately this is the only advice i can really give you at the moment. Good luck

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @funny pepper. Late response, i think it is possible he does it because he likes you. I think there is more impetus for a guy to run around for a girl he likes or be nicer to a woman he likes, its just in our nature to do it as guys. So my guess is that he does like you if hes doing it for you but not for them.. the only way i cannot see this being interest is if he doesn't know anyone else beside you. Good luck

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      Ashlet 3 years ago

      There is another thing I just thought of. He treats me differently... then like everyone. Not in a good way either

      He's never truly mean or bad or anything, but like to other people he's not as sarcastic. He's even admitted that I'm treated differently, like if someone else wants to play with his sword they can, but I'm absolutely not allowed (though I can usually talk him into letting me, after a bit of mock fighting).

      If I say something goofy, he will tell me straight out how weird I am.

      He also smiles around other people more easily, which is one of the reason I think he doesn't like me. Like when there are people around he doesn't smile at me as much as he smiles for everyone else. But if we're alone he will smile at something that he would have rolled his eyes at if someone were around. He does sweeter things for me so long as I'm not there, or if I am then no else can be.

      WHY???? I could understand if he's shy, but he's not shy around other girls. I could understand if he didn't like me, but then why does he always stand so close to me and watch me whenever I'm not looking.

      If I'm bothering you, you can tell me. I won't mind, but your advice seems better then half the stuff I find with Google...

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      Ashlet 3 years ago

      How do you show someone you like them if you're shy?

      I know a lot of his stunts aren't for attention, but I think some of them are for me. Like he kept telling me about how good at martial arts he is, and either he was 'showing off' or he was really proud... but if he was just proud why would he tell me(it wasn't something that just happened and he wasn't telling everyone)

      I try to avoid needing help with anything so I'm not sure... but he does like to teach me things if that counts. Like anything he knows/thinks I would want to learn he will offer to teach me without me even asking. If I ask he will almost always agree to teach me, or if I'm having trouble learning something he will tell me I'll get it if I keep trying. But at the same time if I'm physically struggling with something(usually reaching something high) he will stand there and watch, though I've never asked for help...

      I realize I'm probably not making this easy for you...

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      Miranda 3 years ago

      Update: well it seems he was busy. But i could swear he was acting different for a whole week after the kiss. But anyway he went back to his old self again which makes me incredibly happy. The part i dint mention was he has a girlfriend. And i know me kissing him was totally wrong!! i get it. But im never gooing to see him again since we're both moving away. And hes going to another city in 2 weeks. he called me and said he missed me and said he wants to meet me one last time. I told him the kiss was wrong and seeing him with his girlfriend made me feel horribly guilty. He said it would be a goodbye kiss. I then asked him why he wants to meet me soo bad. he said because he wanted to kiss me one last time. after a whole lot of discussing we finally came to an agreement saying that there wont be kissing and he said he would try his very best to controle himself. We're going for a movie as we did before. He said he wants to spend some more time with me. remember i mentioned the "touching" yea well he apoligised after he did it the last time. and we still joke about it and laugh it off. he asked me permissionif he could do it the next time. and i since i said im not comfortable with it he said we could just try it and then i could tell him then if its uncomfortable. he told me once that the kiss between us would increase his liking for me. And when i asked him about it after the kiss he said it did increase. and then later when it came to the "touching" he said i still like you as much as i did before. because i told him that touching would be weird because we arnt dating and my feelings have faded a bit since the kiss so i told him we don't like each other in that way either (assuming he doesn't like me anymore) he said he still does like me as much as he did before. and he'd be happy if i could be more open with him. it would bring us closer. he mentioned he liked me for a year. we've been friends for more than a year and in between a misunderstanding took place and we lost touch. that's when he started dating his present girl..

      so my quesiont HERE ...AGAIN :P is....am i the only one or do u feel hes trying to take advantage too?? coz i kinda enjoyed the kiss and i took it in this reaaly playful way. I don't have feelings for him anymore. but do u thinkk hes just using me to just "get some"???

      Thanks so much for your advice :)

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @joann. Hi again Joann.. hope you are doing well! You can't notice other guys because your not yet over the other guy, its very natural.. it might take you months to get over the other guy and to move on. All you need is a good dose of time and patience and things will go back to normal.. but you need to also focus your mind on other things other than this guy. When we idealize one person as being the one we want to be with above all else we always find it hard to find other people of the opposite sex as attractive. That's emotional attachment for you..

      I guess a good analogy is that all this thinking is effectively put you in a hole you dug yourself.. you need to get out of that hole so that everything normalizes. You wont be able to notice other guys until you have allowed yourself to and gotten out of that drop.. Its like coming off a cigarette/smoking addiction and someone telling you to replace it.. most people just don't feel like having a replacement. Your finding it hard to find anything else GOOD right now because in your eyes nothing can replace it.. you have idealized the guy to death.. that's ok for now. Don't rush into finding guys to date, take it easy for a few months.

      I think it is better to just take the approach that because hes 'taken' its better to get over him anyway. If by any chance hes single in a year or 2 time then perhaps something may form out of that but for now focus on mentally and emotionally getting over him. We can get anyone off our minds if we simply focus our minds elsewhere, find a hobbie or something your passionate about (art, music, writing).. that will help you normalize everything so you don't have a wandering mind as much. Take it easy. Good luck

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @Ashlet. Well you have a choice to either tell him you like or show him you like him and then wait for him to come to you ans ask you out, not really any other options.. Which you choose is up to you. If he is showing off then he likely likes you for sure, if you feel that his general 'stunts' as you call them are to get your attention or to show off to you how cool he is then yes hes into you.

      Protective means he has a general caring attitude to you like he'll look after you or rather when you're in trouble or in struggle he likes to jump in help you and look after you.. if hes protective its generally the most biggest sign you could get. If you get that with him then hes definitely into you. Good luck :)

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      Cici 3 years ago

      Ok lol sorry for all the comments but this week was testing week for all grades and stuff right and when we were taking a break after 40 min of testing i went to the bathroom with my friend and coincidentally he came out his class the same time as me ( his testing site is up stairs like mine all the way down the other side of both hallways) anyway E asked if i could come to his class afterwards and i did so i skipped lunch and went to is class and he mostly just ignored me the whole time we flirted jus a little but he mostly didn't tlk to me so i was sitting down across from him and he was drawing something and i saw it was a doodle of his ex girlfriends name and im thinking in my head like WTF, U GOTTA BE KIDDING ME and so since the bell was about to ring i went to put the books away and i saw my friend R laying down in a chair ( he didn't feel good that day) nd i asked him if hes ok and he grabbed my arm and we started alughing and i turned around and saw E gong through my backpack and im like wat u doin nd he's like don't tlk to me since u tlkin to R nd im like ok w.e nd i was jus laughing and when i grabbed my backpack and walkout the class with E he jus kept calln me baby nd slapped my ass a couple times nd later that day for the last period i was walking down the hall and i saw E and i looked like he was waiting for me but idk nd i we were walking and he called up his friend S who was in front of us nd he Pointed to me nd they both kinda laughed but i didn't take notice of it like that. But anyway we kept walking down the hall and we were tlking nd he kinda had his hand on my back nd i turned around to him and he was Gshit staring at my chest and i caught im like 3 times doing that so i took of my backpack nd put it in front of my chest nd im like what u staring at and he's like what it's not mine nd im like no and we started walking up the stairs and i was wereing cargos that day nd he grabbed my ass again nd i'm like wtf ( lol i was laughing the whole time tho) but i think he kinda wanted to give another kiss cause he kinda tried to slow down a little bit nd told everyone to mive along ( and before when we were in the staircase we were the on ly ones there) but he only told people that once but it was w.e but their was to much people coming in tho so he jus kept walking ( but me guessing he jus wanted to kiss me again but idk that's jus wat i think) nd when we walked to his classroom which is the first class he literally grabbed my my ass where he could touch my couchy nd im like whoa wtf nd started laughing

      Can u help me with wat this means now cause he doodles is ex's name, points to me when we were walking, ask's me to comte to his class nd barely tlks to me, then he's eyeing my chest like he's never seen them before, nd etc. like what does he want from me like idk im more confused then ever!! please help nd sorry for the long comment again

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      Miranda 3 years ago

      So i went on a date with this guy. And we kissed. I enjoyed it but since it was my first kiss ever i wasn't sure if he really did like it. I asked him and he said it was nice but i think he said that only to be nice. We kissed many times more than 8 times. and the last kiss was around 15 seconds after which he said. Okay that was too much with a cute giggle because i gotta agree with him it had become too much. it was very intense. He did try to get touchy which i wasn't quite okay with. is it normal for guys to try to do that during a kiss?? I told him and he apologised later and after 3 kisses he asked me if we were gonna kiss again. Does that mean he enjoyed it?? Im soo confused after we left he texted me immediately and then again before going to sleep which he never really does. and then the next day he dint text at all. I have no idea what to think, Did he find the kiss horrible. we cuddled throughout the movie and then suddenly he would give me this tight cuddle hug which i found ADORABLE. His arm was around me the entire movie. Oh and another thing was he kept playing with my lips. I dint quote get why he was doing that. he played with my hair and my cheeks and then he play with my lips since my head was on his shoulder and his head was leaning on my head. he asked me if we were ever going to meet again. He asked me if we could see each other next time too. Soo my question is what do you think about this whole thing??

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      Cici 3 years ago

      Lol sorry i was reading but he was tryna tlk to me in the staircase nd i ignored him btw sorry i jus wanted to point that out

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      Cici 3 years ago

      Thanks for the advice tho and sorry for the long comment. Before you responded to me tho i already took my friends advice nd started ignoring him nd all that shit but i did notice he'd still try to get my attention like sometimes every time im tlkn to my friends he'd come nd start tlkn to them nd shit but whenever i'de tlk to his step sis he'd be like oh sis dnt tlk to her nd start laughn knowing the way i am that ill react but nd once i was walkn wit my friend nd he came nd started tlkn to her nd i ignored him nd he jus started holdiing my hand nd stuff. But i shrugged it off thinkn he jus doin stuff like that jus to do it. One thing tho we aleays give each other glances even if we like 30 ft away i could turn arund nd we would jus glance at each other. But ealier this week i was walking to class nd shit nd him nd his friends were walking like 5 ft in front of me up the staircase when he stoped nd his friends started walking without him nd i was tryna tlk nd i was ignoring him nd stuff when he started touching me nd playn nd stuff when he was like give me a kiss nd i was like naw i can't do that nd i turned my cheek and turned back around nd he kissed me nd i was like that's not a kiss lol i was jokin ne he knew i was and when we walked all the way up the staircase nd to his class which is down the hall from mine tbh he seemed alittle happy tho but after that i really didn't see him for the rest of the day but can you jus explain to me whats goin on. I mean its not the first time he asked me for a kiss but i jus never gave him one. Help nd thanks for the advice!

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @Cici. That was one hell of a comment! Shorter comments would help me reply faster next time Cici. I had a quick read of the whole situation though!.. He seems possessive of you... So perhaps he likes you and lied when he said he doesn't like you.. or perhaps he doesn't like you like that but just doesn't want anyone else to have you because he feels like he owns you? Yes these type of guys exist.. they like to have every girl#s attention on them even when they don't want to date them.

      My guess is that he likes you but wont admit it.. he is just acting like a hormonal teenager.. or hes a controlling player ever who gets thrills off telling who you can and cannot hang with or date. But attempting to make you jealous is what makes me thinks he likes you (or did like you). Going by the fact he touches you makes it seem like he likes you.. Either that or hes a self entitled perv who thinks every girl can be groped/touched.

      First of all its NOT you doing anything wrong here, you obv want him to like you but because its not going in a more straight forward way your viewing yourself as the wrong/bad one.. Its easy to think your the one doing everything wrong/bad but the way he behaves is just a load of passive aggressive guilt tripping hence him taking your arm off him.

      It could be he likes you but doesn't want his friends to know he likes you..Guys your age get off on messing with girls heads.. because its the only way they know how to get themselves onto your mind. Why are bothered he did not get you anything? He is not your boyfriend remember. If he is not buying anything for you to get a reaction out of you then his game was working on you no?

      Forget whether he likes you or not.. and just focus on your studies.. if he wants you he will make it clear and not go this indirect way of beating around the bush. He just needs to grow up and be clearer with his feelings (if he has any).. you need to expect less from him. Good luck

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      funny pepper 3 years ago

      i don't sit near him anymore but we still exchange smiles and when i ask him to get stuff for me or ask him a question he will do it and he doesn't do that for most girls

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      joann 3 years ago

      hey

      soo i noticed lately that i really can't seem to notice other guys. There are cute guys everywhere and they doo gimme their attention. But i just don't feel anything. He's always on my mind. Anything i do the slightest good that happens to me the bad the horrible the sad and the exxtreemely person things that happen in my life i want him to know it first. From the awesome cupcakes i had for tea to the horrible tummy spoiling food i had for dinner as soon as it happens hes the first person to pop up in my head that i wanna tell all of this to. Is it possible that im in love with him? we texted a lot for almost 2 years we've never met properly. Hes a friends friend. i see him a lot in my neighbourhood. But u noe how when ur out at the mall and u notice someone cute looking at you and u get these butterflies in ur tummy for a few seconds. Its compleetely stopped for me. i just don't seem to be interested in them at alll. theres this other guy friend of mine who made it clear that he liked me and hes an incredible guy but while talking to him too i wanted to tell my crush about him how this guy keeps flirting and how awesome he is. and He just never leaves my mind.

      what's wrong with me? why can't i notice other guys?

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @funny pepper. Is he shy and quiet or really outgoing and loud? Is he looking away because you catch him looking at you? Does he seem intimidated by you? There is a possibility he may ask you simply because he wants your attention or to get to know you better. Or he just simply trusts you more than some of the others around him. To me it sounds like he is getting mad because he feel hurts you moved away because you wanted nothing to do with him possibly..

      The fact he takes this very personally may show he's interested in you but it might just make him feel betrayed as well depending on how you treat him in general. But if you hardly know each other and he knows the other people sat with him then i think hes overreacting and probably doing that because he likes you. Its hard for me to give you a definite here, I'd guess he probably does like you though. I would probably need more info and anymore signs you may be getting from him to give you a proper answer.. Thanks for the compliment. Good luck

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @Joann. Hi Joann. I personally think he likes you but not enough to leave his current GF.. lets be honest if he really wanted to be with you he would have already left the other woman and made it clear he wants you rather than beating around the bush, all I'm seeing here is a guy who likes the attention of two women on him at once.. keeping you on a string as a possible back up.

      I know some women who have been in love with some guy for anywhere in-between 1-3+ years.. it happens.. as a guy i would feel really special if someone had liked me that long! But personally i think this guy isn't worth it right now, perhaps maybe in the future i don't know... i hope you find someone who will make his feelings clear and want to be with you 100%.

      He is mad because he wants to have you hooked on him while he goes and dates other women which is selfish.. but now you have made a decision to get on with your life hes angry because he doesn't have that control over you. I am not trying to paint the guy in a bad light, this is just how i see it. His acting differently is just passive aggressive behavior, its his way of saying "i didn't get my own way with you so im going to be angry about it and ignore you". He has no right to say he is disappointed in you. You owe him nothing.

      He is trying his sweet talk with you.. but again he is not giving you the full deal.. always look at the bigger picture, he is taken! He is simply keeping you as a backup.. I cannot help you here.. Like i said he finds you somewhat attractive but not enough to leave his current GF. Hes already got something 'built up' with the other woman so he obviously consider this woman serious unless he leaves her and comes seeking you.

      Feelings? Likely yes, they could also just be on a sexual level.. feelings enough to leave his current girl for you? Unfortunately no. PS: The moving will be tough i'm sure.. I wish you luck in moving to a new country, i hope the move goes well for you. Talk soon

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      Ashlet 3 years ago

      So you're advice is to do nothing because either he likes me, or he doesn't? I can do that! But in all seriousness...

      Well, I don't think he knows I like him, but it is a smile like he knows something I don't so maybe.

      What I think is him trying to be impressive are things like him flipping off things and other 'action movie' stunts, or his skills in martial acts or the like. Or pretty much anything on a snowboard/skateboard, it seems like every time I'm around he ollies over things, and if I wasn't around he'll tell me about how he did something awesome.

      As for the not listening, I'm not really sure if he's not listening because if I ask him a question he'll answer, but if I ask a question to anyone or say a simple statement he doesn't make any indication he heard me.

      And protective how? I'm not really sure what you mean by 'protective'

      Thanks for the advice :)

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      Cici 3 years ago

      I also forgot to mention that a week before my Bday he got suspended for touching a girl inappropriately I guess. and my birthday was on a Tuesday and he missed and came back the next day which was Wednesday and he didn't say anything to me not a hi or bye or sorry i missed your bday ( if he knew or not i think he forgot since he wasn't here) but anyway when he came back its like he completely ignored me. But no lie we saw and looked at each other but being stubborn like i am i really wasn't gone make the first move to tlk and he didn't either so we left it at that until later that day after school for the first basketball game and everyone was gonna be there and shit so after i performed for half time me nd my friend went to buy some chips nd shit nd when we came back we were walking to our seats and that's when E called me nd was like baby come here nd my friend that i went to go buy the chips wit was like dnt go cause she no the situation im in with him and being stupid i went and he didn't say hi or nothn jus give me some money and im thinkn in my mind like is this nigga foreal he dnt say nothn to me all day not even a simple HI so i sized him up and took my friend so we could go to our seats and i heard all of E's friends saying OH SHIT SHE SIZED YOUR SHIT and all that other stuff so after the game he hugged me nd stuff so i no he wasn't mad but but my other friend and me was tlking to one of E's friends and he was like oh E theirs your girlfriend but E kinda ignored him and wat he was saying and kept tlking to a couple of his friends and they left and didn't say goodbye ir nothn like and tbh i really didn't care cause he stay actn different and shit any ways it finally came Friday( which was Vday ) and we were cool and shit tlkn flirtn like usual nd my friend tht rides his bus was like E brought two gifts a bear and a red bag wit a heart balloon stick and he gave the bear to his ex and the bag i still dnt no who that was for but wat hurt me most was that he didn't even bother to get me nothn which i thought he would but he didn't in my mind i was like wtf all over i just didn't understand why

      this whole thing between me nd him is so complicated and stupid like one time i get him the other i dnt understand why is it so complicated why does he act like thAT playing wit my head giving me fucked up emotions can you please help! please

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      Cici 3 years ago

      Ok theirs this guy we'll call E i never really liked him but we always kinda flirted with each other just alittle bit tho not a lot until we came back from winter break where everyones ready to show off their new shit and meet up wit people and everyone was already in a good mood and stuff so me and him only got one class with each other which is gym and the day we came back everyone was tlking but we jus kept glancing at each other and smiling and he came up to me and got me in a chokehold ( by the way hes shorter than me but stronger and hes in the 7th grade im in 8th) and asked my why im not tlking to him and i said you're just not tlking to me and we went by that but we did flirt alittle after still. After that since we just got back we had to take the winter diagnostics and when my class was sone i asked my teacher if i could go finish some of my other work which is my( flvs my vertual class in midle school) in another class and my plan was to go to E's class knowing my other teacher will let me go and she did. So when i was walking to the class i saw my friend R and he got in trouble so he was sitting in front of the class and that's when i asked E's teacher if i can do some work in her class and she like yea that's when R was lke oh you no that's E's girlfriend and stuff like that and i looked in E's class and he was like oh theirs my baby and o lie i started blushing alittle and i walked in started doing my work when E asked his friend if he could go to another computer so he could sit next to me and started flirting with me and stuff later on E was playing a madden game on the computer he asked me to help and all that other shit and i looked away for a second and he turned my head and kissed me on the cheek but it was like a quick second because his other friend eric put his finger and touched him in the ass and we called him gay and shit lol after still being in the class he asked if ill ever kiss him nd i was like idk cause we not daiting and he like wat and i was like nvm and other stuff (SORRY IF IM RAMBLING ON AND ON BUT A lot OF STUFF HAPPENED IN THAT CLASS THAT DAY). A week after that happened i got new braids and i was walking to gym and he turned around and saw me and was like oh theirs my baby and picked me up and all that and afteer that like whole month of those things happening i asked him do you like me and we was like naw and i was like oh ok and things kinda got alittle weird after that the next day i was talking to didi and E was like you cheatn onme now and i was like we not together and laugh and walked away. But it seems whenever i talk to another guy he be like come here why you tlkn to him and dnt tlk to him im right here or come on baby or he'd jus try to make me jealous by seeing me tlk to my friend didi he'd be like oh come here K ( another girl) and start tlking to her and flirting in front of me also i remember this one time i didn't fell like walking out the gym to get dressed to i asked anthony can he pick me up that's when he saw and he's like oh come here K and started messing with her and I no for a fact that he only did that to get me jealous or something so earlier this week ( IM SKIPPINGON TO THIS WEEK CAUSE A lot HAPPENED) i went to E's 3 period because and i walked in and started my work but they were doing an assignment so he couldn't really mess wit me so when they were putting their books away he came up to me took my headphones out my ears and put them in his ears to listen to wat im listening to and put them back in my ears giving me a quick kiss on my cheek and after that when they were getting ready to lunch and he asked my why i dnt tlk to him and stuff and i was like you dnt tlk to me and then i left to go get my backpack to go to their lunch and i saw him lokking at me and he calleed me fine and stuff and later that day since i got switched out their gym i usually walk their and leave so i saw him and was like hey buddy and i put my arm around him and he took it off him sayng chill and i was like wtf and walked away.

      The main thing i dnt understand is every time he's around his friends he dnt tlk to me and sometimes he does my squeexing my ass and shit and other times he just dnt tlk to me perod and it makes me wonder wtf am i doing wrong cause i feel like he playing me nd shit but sometimes some of his friends are like are like oh theirs ur girlfriend and stuff but we never wnt out we just flirting bddys tho Help me please im just confused.

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @Ashlet. I think he likes you if you have all those signs but i still think you should allow him to be the one to ask you out if you like him back.. the word 'smirk' means to smile in a smug or conceited manner so does he know you already like him? When guys act smug it tends to be one of few reasons, he knows you like him so he uses it against you; plays games with you. The other reason is that he tends to do it as a way to show off to his friends.. but if he is trying to impress you and you can define better what he does to impress you then that would be your strongest sign of them all. Teasing is good.. but not listening to what you say not so much (but then perhaps he is pretending not to hear you?).

      I cannot say for *sure* whether this guy likes you. He does come off as a guy who is possibly hiding his interest though.. he seems to ACT tough as a way of possibly hiding his interest.. some guys go out of their way to be 'bad boys' or 'tough guys' simply because they think it will help them be liked more. Is he is very protective of you? That might help us me more..

      Him sayin something is bad for you (constantly) then saying he doesn't care seems a bit odd... which is why i think he likes you but is hiding his interest OR he knows you like him and hes trying to throw you off and let you know hes not interested. One of the 2 i would guess. Good luck

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @Jens. What kind of hints is he giving you? Im not a fan of getting involved with someone already taken.. it is miles better to let someone become single before dating them. From what i read here he may have some feelings or he may just care for you as a good friend does ( i believe the latter otherwise he would have already left his current gf or spend more time with you over his gf). Personally i think if hes been with this girl 3 years he's likely to stay with her.

      When did he know you had a crush on him? Years ago or more recently? When he said you should have told him i think he just means you should have told him when he was still single.. I dont think there is much you can do.. he is seeing someone, all you can do is limit your friendship if helps. I think it would be unfair to keep leading you on if he is.. but it would also be unfair if he cannot accept you want to be left alone. Potentially it might be better to seek someone else as a boyfriend or just limt your friendship so you can move on. Unless he makes it clear hes into you then you will always be the one in the middle. Good luck

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      funny pepper 3 years ago

      hey there is this boy in class that sits aT MY TABLE EVERY time SOMETHING FUNNY OR AKward happens he looks at me then glances off and then looks back again and then glances off again he sida he if ever got the iphone 5c he would get slamon like me why would u get the iphone 5c when the six is coming out and yet when he doesn't know something he will ask me at the end of the table instead of the person right next to him alos when we work in partners with table mates i always pick someone eles or people pick me he will look at me like are serious did u just leave me with these other people and when i moved seats and somebody eles sat beside him he got mad at me i moved he is white and i am black with two other races im not ugly either people from all races tell me im hot or stare at me of giggle at their friends pointing towards me NOT TRYING TO SOUND LIKE A NARRICST im happy with me can you please help you arte great on tips and sorry for the spelling im typing really fast

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      Joann 3 years ago

      well I just got news that I might shift to another country and Im completely and utterly heartbroken...I think i really did fall in love with this guy im not sure if its possible to fall in love with someone who you've known only for a year and a half . He just doesn't seem to understand the fact that i do like him a lot maybe even love him because according to him Its not possible to happen so fast.. anyway the other day i asked him wether maybe it was time we forgot about everything about me liking him and everything else related to it... he got mad and said okay if that's what you want... but then all of a sudden he stops talking to me and he starts acting completely different... he told a friend of my friend saying that he missed me and that he was disappointed in me.(PS-he doesn't noe shes a friend of my friend)..I couldn't stay away from him and so i texted him he acted a bit mean but then we sorted everything out and he said he stopped talking to me because he was trying to help me to forget him he also said that he missed me sooo much and that he did care for me and he was sad because i stopped liking him he wanted to be angry but he just couldn't..have any idea what's the reason behind that behaviour??? anyway he says since maybe its my last time here he would want to kiss me before i leave...every time i ask him wether he would remember me later on he says He will always stay in touch.. he's also said i love you many many many times..he calls me sweetheart too... Im not sure about what's going on here..can u please help me out im not going to kiss him AT ALL that's for sure Ive made that clear... but why on earth would a guy be sooo desperate for a kiss from his friend when he already has a gf who he's happy with... he said hes liked me for a year and a half.. and that after waiting for soo long he wanted a kiss... but do u think hes got real feelings?? that's ALL I WANT TO KNOW...are there real feelings or not??

      PS- he first noticed me wayyy before he got in a relationship he knew his girlfriend at that time.. but every time i would be near him he would stare this staring went on for around a year..we texted ocassionaly and soon we lost touch due to some misunderstanding..and that's when he stared dating her suring those few months we stopped talking and now when hes with his girlfriend and when im around he can't stop staring at me. I really need ur advice..all i want to know if he really does have genuine feelings?

      THANK YOU SOO MUCH :)

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      Ashlet 3 years ago

      My crush does 1,3,4, and 8??? Like he watches me and smirks, but looks away when I look up. Or if he's telling a story, he spends half the story looking at me.

      But he teases me. He'll tell me I'll hurt myself if I do something(pretty much anything) but not that he cares. And he also never seems to listen to what I say, but he also can answer questions about me (like my hobbies and stuff) which I only said once...

      Also we're kinda friends if that makes a difference

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @Joann. I would not read too much into whether his GF goes to a wedding with him, i'd take a GF to a wedding even if i knew her for 3 months. When something is serious there has to be a bit more to it, serious would indicate things like proposal/moving in together. The most important thing that makes a RS serious is that it is always moving forward. IF one person in a RS is not serious enough they jump as soon as commitment draws closer.

      You said the right words.. now you have to back up your words with your actions, that is... you have to back off from him bit by bit. Do NOT settle for 2nd place, you are better than that.. He has to choose one or the other, do not verbalize this however.. If you do the double dating he will simply take advantage of both of you because he cannot choose. His problem.

      I think that him kissing you definitely means he see you as attractive at some level but i think it is more important to look at the bigger picture, there are hundreds of guys who would NOT suggest double dating.. i would not feel good or special being someone only good enough for a double date, do you get me?

      I personally think he may be enjoying his power over the situation.. but this isn't about his needs for a GF on the side.. this is about 'your' needs.. You deserve respect and a clear message. Don't get entangled in any games or webs. Backing off will probably be best for you, personally i think there are men out there who are better and wont mess you around, find a man who puts you first before this idea of 'double dating'. Good luck

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      jens 3 years ago

      My ex crush also a very good frnd of mine now keeps trying to give me hints that he likes me although he's dating someone from past three years...but he always does that hes protective about me he holds my hand and acts cute. first few times i ignored thinking we just such gud friends now and i don't wanna ruin that but now am very curious as i still find him cute..also he knew i had a crush on him and said that i should've told him and he smiled but i am not sure what he meant as he is always playful...what do u think i should do?

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      Joann 3 years ago

      Hey

      this is an update the other day i brought out the opic about ditching the whole liking process and since he askd me for sometime to decide about us...I told him its time we forgot everything and that i wouldn't really like if he left his girlfriend and got really annoyed and kept asking me why i wanted to ditch it but he dint want to . He said he'd decide within a month!

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      Joann 3 years ago

      Ive waited for your reply since ages :D it was totally worth it....he recently took his girlfriend to his cousins wedding that sounds serious ryte? anyway we spoke to each oder on the phone the other day from 1am to 4am and said he wanted to kiss me and he couldn't wait until he was single again i said i couldn't do that because he has a gf and again it wouldn't be fair. He often talks about double dating but then again i said its not the right thing.. at time he does talk corrupted talks like how a friend wuld talk but then i asked him why he does that he said im the only one he could be himself with and that he doesn't talk to any oder girl like that and not even his girlfriend. i askd him how much he liked me on a scale from 1-10 he said 4 coz he sed tht i couldn't expect him to like me more than hia gf. its confusing he acts like he likes me more and den he saus he can't do that!!

      and do u think a guy would want to kiss a girl if he liked her just 4points... Its gotta be more ryte??

      thanks a ton :)

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @Joann. Hi there, first of all thanks for the comment. Secondly this is a bit late so hope im not too late on that front. To me it sounds like he likes you and a lot more than this current GF (honestly).. but he wont do anything about it because of age difference and what his friends or family may say. That does not mean he does not like you or does not care about you.

      In psychology looking down usually means embarrassment or guilt.. i would say hes embarrassed you caught him looking or shy about you think of him. His nervousness would suggest he cares about how he looks to you. Unfortunately as hes taken there is nothing you can really do unless he breaks off his current RS and comes to you.

      My only advice here is.. don't be the one in the middle. If he has not decided to be your boyfriend within 1 month then its time to move on and find a new guy. This does not mean he can't date you in a years time etc.. but i think it would unfair on you if he leaves you hanging long term. So give it some weeks then decide what to do.. Keep me posted. Good luck

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      Joann 3 years ago

      heyy i really love your article.. it answered A lot of my questions.!!

      I need your thoughts on this .. Ive known this guy for more than a year now... we've seen each other a lot around and we text a lot.. we never hung out before..as i said we've seen each other in the same neighbourhood!! so after one year of texting we finally meet up and it gets really awkward since there's nothing to really talk bout.. and i noticed this he kept looking at me and when i turned to look at hime he looked down this happened every 3 seconds my friends noticed it too. he seemed a bit nervous but that could just be because we're meeting up for the 1st time.. he got a girlfriend and we just met as friends. the thing is Ive had a crush on him for a verry long time ive likes him before he even met his present girlfriend... in the middle we lost contact and that's the time the started dating... and now he chats endlessly....the point is theres quite a huge age difference but he said that dint matter .. he was scared of what the people and his friends might say.. Ive asked him weder he ever had feelings.. never asked him out or anything because hes already dating that would be direspectful to his girlfriend... and he said he liked me as a friend... and that's when i sed fine we'll remain awesome friends and never think bout liking each other again let tht be in the past..but he doesn't want that too.. he keeps saying he wont let me frget him and that he needs time to think about it...its just really confusing ive noticed him starung at me even when hes with his girlfriend!!! He doesn't even listen to what's shes says if im around

      what does this mean to you?? am i his pass time also he moslty meassages me after 10pm everdday and then we text till 2-3 in the morning

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @babybunnie. I hate to be the bearer of bad tides but have you ever though you might just be looking for something that isn't there? To me from what i have read since the beginning, i believe he knows your into him and is just avoiding you (very possibly). You have to be honest with yourself.. unfortunately not everyone out there is going to like us back.. if he is interested hes showing it in a very bizarre way...

      I think you need to expand your horizons and meet other guys and not be so focused on this one guy.. to be so focused on one guy so much is time wasted and potentially unhealthy.. there is plenty of others guys out there to see, talk to and date. Are you sure he denied your friend request? Perhaps he did not see it and you are jumping the gun? Perhaps he does not use Facebook much? Perhaps he does not add people he considers strangers? Perhaps he is avoiding you for his own reasons? I can only speculate so much.

      I do kind of get the feeling your hoping he will like you or come around to liking you but i think the truth is right in front of you.. he hasn't approached you or made any effort with you. I think you will be wasting your time if you don't seek out new guys in your life, how can this guy be your prince charming when you don't even know him anymore? Sometimes people can get so sucked into what they want that any little sign they get to mean something.

      I mean.. whatever he wants.. he hasn't done anything to really show you he wants you. He has never talked to you. And if he is shy then he will try at a later date, don't wait.. seek out new guys. I know guys too well.. i personally think he would of added you to his Facebook if he was interested in you (guys aren't complicated). Good luck

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      Jay Rando 3 years ago from England

      @ColorfulNoodles96. Hi there.. if he hasn't spoken to you that long and all of a sudden turns up saying that he obviously wants or needs something from you.. This tends to happen quite often when the guy is into you, his santa message sounds kinda random and not the kind of thing the average guy would say if he wasn't flirting, in other words i find his santa message kinda flirty. But what i do know is that he cares very much about the friendship you have.. otherwise he would not be chasing you up on it.

      My thinking is that hes 'very likely' into you because he sent the random santa message and seems to be way too interested in securing this friendship with you (unless he just wants everyone around him to be his friend). If hes that crazy about being friends there must be something that bothers him about not being friends. Perhaps he realized how cool a person you are after all these years.. Good luck

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