Andrea writes on various topics from dating, couples, astrology, weddings, interior design, and gardens. She studied film and writing.
Dating a Co-Worker
Work can be tedious. Meetings go on forever, someone ate your lunch, and your boss doesn’t understand you. When you lock eyes with someone while printing copies at the photocopy machine, it can feel like magic. A crush on a co-worker can get you through the doldrums of the day.
Maybe your career isn’t advancing, but you could run away with that cutie on floor 6 and spend the next few years with them in the Bahamas. Then again, maybe not.
People fall in love and marry their co-workers all the time. It could start with some odd lingering at the water cooler. Someone might gingerly touch your shoulder while at the office Christmas party.
For some, office romances are the worst. Blending work with your personal life can be dicey. Yet, the striking person with pretty teeth also has the same interests as you because the both of you somehow ended up at the same job.
There are a lot of benefits to dating someone you work with. They’ve already been drug tested, gone through a background check, and most likely already got a good idea of what you’re like since they’ve been around you throughout the week. If someone still wants to see you when they’ve already spent 8 hours with you — that’s a sign that you guys have chemistry.
Plus, there’s the added bonus of having someone on your side who can share more workplace gossip with you. Think how great it’ll be to have the inside scoop on that one co-worker who wears top hats and owns a parrot.
Dating a co-worker means you can subtly flirt throughout the day, and it can help build momentum for when you're both off work.
If you both work at the same place, you probably have things in common or mutual friends.
You have someone who might be willing to grab dinner for you, or fill up your car with gas, or leave cute things on your desk.
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If you don’t like your job, you’ll at least have one person you won’t mind seeing.
There’s always the awkward “what if you end up breaking up” scenario. It may be a good idea to come up with a contingency plan on how you can break up smoothly just in case that happens. You don’t want your romantic, personal life and career to get screwed up in one blow.
You may have to deal with gossipy co-workers who have nothing better to do than talk about you, make fun of you guys, or act jealous and strange. Co-workers say the weirdest things; it’s best not to be on their radar. You may feel the need to keep your romantic life hidden, which may or may not suck.
You may find it difficult to concentrate and start drifting off into sexy daydream land. (Ah, the sexy daydream land! Enjoy it while it lasts.)
You may find it difficult to make work-related decisions that are unbiased toward your lover. You may unfairly give them advantages… or disadvantages when there is a breakup.
The office romance could be an obstruction to your career… or it could slow your growth because people think you’re concentrating more on your boo than your work. You might also come off more annoying and get looked over when it comes to raises and promotions.
Signs Your Co-Worker Likes You
Putting the pros and cons aside, here are 60 signs that your co-worker likes you:
- They regularly stop to chit-chat at your desk. They seem to have rehearsed material.
- He refers to you as his “office wife.”
- When people see the two of you talk, they smile and chuckle to themselves. Sometimes they point at the two of you.
- You notice he starts wearing nicer, and nicer clothes.
- He starts smelling more of cologne. She starts smelling more of perfume.
- He tries to get you to hang out one on one outside of the office. He consistently wants to hang out.
- She texts you about things not work-related. She texts you consistently.
- He brings you your favorite foods, candy, gifts, flowers — anything and everything to get your attention.
- They act discrete at work, but their facial cues or body language leak that they like you. There is a certain awkwardness that you’re picking up on.
- He starts to mention things without a filter — that he’s looking for somebody, he’s been happier since you’ve started working there, that you would make for a nice magazine model.
- She keeps asking if you’ll go to the office party. She wants to know if you have plans after the office party. (She could also just be being friendly.)
- They know your routine, and they ask you about things when you break the norm. This person could be: (1) observant, (2) creepy, or (3) crushing on you.
- She seeks your approval on non-work-related matters. She makes a concerted effort to be agreeable with you.
- He makes it clear that he is single. He inquires into your relationship status.
- They have a soft spot for you. You ask them for a favor, and they gladly do it.
- He’ll ask you about your goals. Do you want kids? Do you want to keep working here? Do you want to move overseas? They’re gauging whether you’re on a similar page to them.
- He’ll try to figure you out — how many siblings do you have, what did you study in college, what are your favorite television episodes?
- You notice he does what he can to make you feel special and happy.
- You’ll feel differently emotionally. Something will just feel different in the air. You’ll get the vibes… but do you reciprocate?
- She takes you out to a friendly dinner… and pays.
- You end up hanging out with her and talking into the wee hours of the morning.
- He picks you up in his car and opens the door for you.
- She smiles and laughs a lot when in your presence. She also blushes. She also doesn’t laugh this much around others.
- He compliments your appearance. He likes the way you curl your hair, he thinks your new black skirt is attractive, he loves the cute thing you do with your makeup.
- They miss you when you go on a week-long vacation. They either flat out tell you this… or you get an increase in text messages.
- He breaks up with his girlfriend and starts spending a massive amount of time with you.
- She tries to sit next to you in meetings. She likes to be in close proximity.
- They like to talk to you about all the other coworkers. They want to know you and share gossip with you. (This could also be a way to recruit you as a friend.)
- He saves you part of his dinner or gives you the dessert.
- She gets in trouble because she’s not focusing on the job and appears distracted by you. This is a sign that you should spend less time with her at work and more time outside of work.
- He ignores you to focus on work, but he keeps a healthy amount of conversation with you outside of work.
- She tries to find things to do with you outside the busy work schedule — walks in the park, movies, dinner dates, bowling, dancing, etc.
- He wants to spend his PTO time with you! His precious PTO time!
- They take an interest in whether you’ve gotten enough sleep, if you’ve eaten, or if you’ve been working overtime. (This person could also be considered an office mom.)
- He asks if you drink. He also asks about your favorite bars.
- She finds a way to touch you casually — a handshake, a hug, a tap on the shoulder.
- He informs you when there is free food.
- He likes to send you “how was your day” text messages. These are sent at the same time every day.
- She wants to know if anyone at work is treating you poorly.
- He leaves you happy sticky notes to brighten your day.
- He marks his territory when other guys are around. He wants to be the best candidate for your love — so he may say something absurd to stick out from the crowd. He doesn’t want to lose you to one of the other guys. (Warning: if he is showing a lot of jealousy and patriarchal behavior, don’t date him.)
- She might get jealous if she sees you flirting with someone else.
- He might get jealous if he knows you see other guys outside of work.
- They will give glowing reviews about you to anyone.
- He will start talking to you about his close friends and family. He may randomly introduce you to people in his life whether some random family member, his dog, his roommate, or an ex from 13 years ago that he has kept as a friend. He wants you to meet his people. He wants you in his life.
- They’ll run to the store to get you medicine when you’re sick. Please refer to the Korean drama She Was Pretty. If you haven’t seen it, now is the time.
- He’ll act like a kid around you… while simultaneously trying to show off that he is a man with feats of strength and other spectacles.
- She brings you baked goods.
- He cancels plans with his buddies to spend time with you.
- He hugs you goodbye. It’s a long hug.
- She’ll store all kinds of strange things about you in her memory bank. She may suddenly go on about dinosaurs or red velvet cake because she knows that is what you like.
- He’ll say the strangest compliments…. like that you remind him of his grandmother. He didn’t mean any harm by that.
- He’ll want you to see his place… and he’ll want to see yours. He’ll want to know what it’s like in your car with you driving. He’ll have a lot of questions that he won’t directly ask you. He wants to get to know you.
- She complains that nothing interesting happens when you’re not at work.
- If things at work change and he’s on a completely different schedule, he reaches out to you by text a lot more. He might miss the once cute conversations at your desk when you had to request something from accounting.
- They ask you to take a lunch break with them. You go to an upscale restaurant.
- He’ll make sure you signed up for your health insurance… because he really doesn’t know what else to say and wants to make sure you’re making smart decisions. It’s a little overbearing, but whatever.
- He takes pictures of you on his phone. If you want him to stop doing that, tell him.
- She’ll stay at work just a little longer if it means she’ll get to run into you.
- They have a sweet nickname for you. No one else calls you by that name.
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
© 2015 Andrea Lawrence