How to Ruin a Romantic Valentine’s Day Date
Just like there are lists of things you shouldn't say or do at a job interview, so too are there lists of things you shouldn't say or do on a Valentine's Day date.
In your quest to find creative ways to celebrate Valentine’s Day with your sweetheart, make sure you also read up on what not to do on the most romantic day of the year. But remember, dating is a two-way street. Both of you have a role to play in making sure your evening out together is fun and relaxed.
Here’s a tongue-in-cheek guide on how to ruin a romantic Valentine’s Day evening for two. Try one, two, or three of these tips and see how quickly you end up in the dog house.
Leave everything to the last minute. Don’t bother making reservations at that hot new restaurant that the two of you have been talking about going to. Why would you need to reserve a table? It’s not like anybody else would choose that restaurant for Valentine’s Day. If you were planning on getting your date a special bouquet of roses, pick those up on the way home from work. That way you’ll be sure to get the best looking flowers. All those early-bird shoppers will have already picked out the dead, wilting, sagging flowers!
Talk about your ex and how you spent your last Valentine’s Day together. Tell your main squeeze about an old flame. People just love hearing about ex-wives, ex-husbands, ex-lovers, on Valentine’s Day. And just to be doubly sure that your partner knows how much she means to you, feel free to compare her to your ex.
Play with one of your gadgets. Check your phone in the middle of dinner. Fill those silent moments by playing solitaire on your phone. Surf the internet while your spouse reads her dinner menu.
Don’t get dressed up for your Valentine's Day date. Wear your casual clothes on your date. If the two of you have been hanging out at home all day, just wear those clothes. Why bother getting dressed up for your date if she’s already seen every outfit you own?
Don’t bother flirting with your date. Flirting is something that only silly lovebirds do, right?
Complain a lot. And then complain some more. Talk about work and how awful your day was. Rant and rave about that idiot who cut you off in traffic. Talk about anything other than how lucky you are to be in a relationship with the most amazing person in the world. Put petty complaints above the importance of spending time with the one you love. If you want to put a damper on Valentine’s Day, just talk about all the things in the world that irritate you.
Treat your Valentine’s Day date night like it’s just any old date night. Don’t make any effort to do something new and exciting for Valentine’s Day.Just do what you do every Friday night! Who says Valentine’s Day should be about using your imagination?
Talk about how expensive everything is on Valentine’s Day. Make sure you throw out a few of these cheapskate chestnuts:
- "The flowers! What a ripoff! I'm not wasting money on flowers!"
- "Do you know how much they were charging for a box of chocolates at the supermarket today?"
- "I can’t believe how much money this dinner is going to cost! Is it OK if we skip dessert?"
Never admit that the reason everything is so expensive is because you left all of your date planning until the last minute.
Invite the whole gang out with you on Valentine’s Day. Tell your honey how much you are looking forward to spending time with her on Valentine's Day. Then take her to the pub where all your single male friends are watching the game.
Don’t look your date in the eyes. Go ahead, let your eyes wander around the room. Check other people out. Glance at your watch. Look up at the nearest big screen TV and watch the hockey game.
Create lots of drama. Yell and curse at other drivers on the way to the restaurant. Drive aggressively. Treat the restaurant staff like second class citizens who should be so lucky to serve you. In fact, forget everything your mother ever taught you about good manners.
Arrive late for your date. Poor time management skills are a great way to show your date that you value her time. And if you’re going to be super late, she’ll figure it out. No need to call her to let her know. She won’t be worried at all!
Play a prank on Valentine’s Day. Has she been hinting that she wants to get married? Did she leave clues all over the house about what she secretly wants for a Valentine’s Day gift? A-ha! There’s your chance to show here what a great guy you are by letting her believe that she’s in for a big surprise. Then just fail to deliver. Women love having to put on a happy face when all they really want to do is cry.
How much time do you spend planning your Valentine's Day night out (including buying the gift or card)?
Obviously, if you want to have a great time on Valentine's Day and show the person you love how much she means to you, don't do any of the things listed in this article. Even if you've been married for a long time, it's still nice to put in an effort and make Valentine's Day extra special!
What's the fastest way to turn a night of hopeful romance into a total dating disaster? Feel free to share your own tips for what not to do on Valentine's Day.
© 2014 Sadie Holloway