Questions and Icebreakers to Ask on a First Date

Updated on November 7, 2016
There's nothing better than the chemistry of good conversation on a first date to ease the nerves.  Photo by Tombre from
There's nothing better than the chemistry of good conversation on a first date to ease the nerves. Photo by Tombre from

Would you think to ask, "How do you handle stress?" on your first date. This may be more appropriate and interesting than the typical, "Where did you grow up" variety. Asking good questions on your first date is the best way to get to know the other person.

By using the best questions depending on your situation, you will be able to find out what you want to know. The information you get is only as good as the questions you ask. If you were interviewing someone as a job candidate, you would be wise to ask questions that are relevant. Your first date should be a fun version of a good interview, that's balanced with listening and responding.

Random Questions to Ask as Ice Breakers

  1. What is something interesting that I should know about you?
  2. What are your hobbies?
  3. Where do you work, and what do you do?
  4. Where did you grow up?
  5. What is your work like? What do you enjoy about work?
  6. What kind of food do you like to eat?
  7. What is the furthest you have traveled from home? Why did you go there?
  8. What is your favorite movie/book/album/artist?

Some people kiss on their first date, but I think these two are a little young.
Some people kiss on their first date, but I think these two are a little young.

General Questions to Learn about Your Date

  1. If you could do anything for a living, what would you do? What is your dream job?
  2. Where do you see yourself in five years?
  3. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
  4. What kinds of things do you think are funny?
  5. What do you look for in a romantic relationship?
  6. What is something that you regret doing in the past?
  7. What has been your most embarrassing moment?
  8. When were you happiest in your life?
  9. Who is someone you admire greatly? Why do you admire him or her?
  10. What do you like about me? What made you decide to go out on this date with me?
  11. How should a guy/girl be treated on a date?

Get to Know Your Date Well with Life Questions

These are questions that are deep enough that you might get an answer that is a deal breaker. You will learn more about the character of your date with these questions. The goal is to find out your date's value, beliefs, and goals using these questions. These questions could help you find a husband, wife, or life partner by letting you know who your date is deep down in his or her core. For this reason, some of these may be too personal for a first date. Use the following with caution:

  1. How do you like to spend your time alone?
  2. How do you spend time with your friends?
  3. Out of everyone you know, who do you admire most?
  4. What is the most expensive thing you have ever bought?
  5. What do you do when you get angry at someone?
  6. How have you changed or grown in the past five years?
  7. What is the most difficult thing you have ever endured?
  8. How do you handle stress?
  9. How much money would totally satisfy you?
  10. What is your relationship with your parents like?
  11. Were you closer to your mom or your dad when you were younger?
  12. What were your parents like growing up?
  13. What kinds of things bother you?
  14. What would your closest friends tell me about you?
  15. What would your family tell me about you?

Interpreting the Answers

Once you get an answer from your date, you will want to think about the implications. Don't be overly analytical, but ask yourself if you need to explore with more questions. In order to know if you want to continue dating your date, you will need to know what you want.

Ask yourself what you are looking for in advance, so you won't give in easily on things you don't want to compromise. Remember to have fun and be willing to share about yourself, don't just ask questions the whole time.

First Date Question Tips

If your date doesn't want to talk, you may want to use icebreaker questions. If you want to get to know more about your date on a deeper level, you should ask deeper questions. Find out who your date is at a level of values, beliefs, and goals. Then you will have the best understanding of your first date, and you will know if you should continue to date him or her.


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