Straight Man at Your Gym
Is there a hot straight man at your gym that you have been keeping your eye on? Does he seem to work out around the same time that you do everyday? When you glance at him, does your heart skip a beat, causing you to get all worked up?
If so, you have a major man-crush on the straight guy at your gym!
But what can you do about it? And how do you handle things if you sense he might be a little curious about you. Is there anyway you can make a straight man from your gym fantasy come true?
This brief article will examine how to pick up straight dude at the gym the right way and help you maximize your chances for a realistic connection, regardless if he straight or bi-cruious.
There are a few steps that you will need to do in advance if you want to really make your fantasy to come true.
I'll let you in on a little secret right now - the advice I am about to give has worked for me and a for a few friends of mine with results that were amazing. Are you ready to learn more?
Let’s jump right in!
Step #1: Find out who the guy’s name
This simple step will give you the ability to do a background check on the dude before you start making any moves.
Finding out his name will then let you do a Google search and potentially a social media search, using Facebook, Twitter and the like. Doing your homework in advance will save you a bunch of time later.
Getting his name
There are a number of ways you can discover the guy’s name you are cruising. Some are on the up and up while others are a bit sneaky.
Here are three choices:
A) Ask someone at the front desk or talk to other gym members in a discreet way.
B) Wait until the dude checks into at the front desk and closely watch his personal information as he swipes in.
C) The easiest way however is to eavesdrop on his conversations at the gym and listen for a name.
If he is the quiet type however and keeps to himself, you will need to follow choice A or B.
Step #2: Search the Internet and Social Media
This particular step is all based on step #1. Assuming you have his name, you can now go about doing an Internet search. Here, you are going to snoop around and see if the guy appears to be gay or straight.
If he is straight, you will pretty much need to end your efforts unless you have reason to believe that the guy might be curious.
If he is gay or you suspect he might be down with meeting, move on to step #3.
Step #3: Get all muscled up and ask for a spot
Pick the day you are going to make your move. Dress somewhat sexy but keep it tamed down. When you get to your gym, make sure you are working on equipment that will be near his location. Because you have been watching this guy for a while now, you should pretty much know his entire workout routine.
In a friendly way, make eye contact with your target and later on, walk over to him and ask for a spot.
Avoid the temptation to strike up major conversations at this point – just ask for the spot. If you want to introduce yourself at some point, that is fine. You will need to act like you do not know his name when he offers his however – remember, you already know it from step #1.
The idea here is to gauge his response and to confirm any potential interest. My suggestion here is to pick something fairly simple while avoiding anything embarrassing.
For example, asking him to spot you while doing a military press would probably be OK. Asking him to spot you while you lay flat on the bench press while he stand behind you (and maybe even elevated depending upon bench) is a bad idea! Think about this for a minute and it will make sense.
Step #4: Say thanks and walk away for that day
Now that you have made verbal and perhaps quasi-physical contact, you should have a basic understanding of what you are dealing with.
You will be tempted to want to ask him for another spot a bit later but I suggest you not do it. The goal here was to establish contact. Your next contact will happen during a future gym visit – so keep reading.
Step #5: Make sure you say hello next time and gym
During this step, you now have a permission slip to make say hello and even make small-talk. The boundary was established from step #3, which loosened up the ground a bit for conversation.
Keep these conversations simple and easy.
Maybe ask a few questions that relate to something you know he is interested in, based off your social media snooping activities from step #2. And it goes without saying, make sure you talk about the gym and working out. The reason being is that you both already have that much in common.
Step #6: Repeat step 5 several times with a twist
There is an old saying – slow and steady wins the race. Allow a few “bump ins” at the gym to occur before you start going for the gold. Remember, you goal is a hook up with your fantasy gym guy, not some random hookup off a phone app.
Each and every time you see this guy, keep it upbeat and positive. Hopefully, he is now offering to spot you or you are offering to spot him.
Now that you two have been talking and sharing, you should have a good sense of what is possible. On one of these random visits, make sure he notices you checking him out. I suggest being somewhat obvious but not ridiculous.
Step #7: Make your move
This is the critical step and the one you have been building up to on your quest to pick up a hot guy at the gym.
The best advice I can give you is to simply ask him if he wants to hang out sometime. If the dude is gay, he will know exactly what you mean.
If the guy is straight but curious, you will likely have your work cut out for you. It might help if you go out to a local straight bar to tie one on. If he hasn't picked up your vibe at this point, the dude is either clueless or is likely waiting for you to make a move. If he is not interested, he would have communicated this to you by now.
Regardless,I would suggest that get it over with fairly quickly and not wimp out. Otherwise, you are just going to be holding on to fantasies forever.
Many readers here will say it is a bad idea to hook up with someone from the gym they workout in.
I can’t lie – there is a lot of truth in this advice.
All I can say is that if you really want to do it anyway, the approach I have laid out here can work. I am not saying it works 100% of the time but I am saying that I have had success with it and more than once.
FYI: The "straight" guys I have connected with have turned out to be a lot more experienced than I thought. Some of the married ones really shocked me.
Remember to use caution. If you play your cards right something fun could happen with the straight guy at your gym you have been wanting.
John on October 20, 2019:
I dreamingly dream of meeting a nice guy at the gym ....I'm reading all your articles ...perhaps I can learn
Dave on August 13, 2018:
So, what about reversal. How does a curious married straight guy find gay or bi partner? Ive gotta guy cross haired, pretty positive he is gay. But I dont have a clue on hip to let him know I would be interested w/o looking like a slut. He just moved in down the street, I cant stop thinning about him. LOL.
Sir Farty Fartsalot on December 15, 2017:
This is so creepy & only perpetuates homophobia. You can't just magically turn on a straight dude. Rejection is inevitable. Just get a Grindr profile or go to a gay bar instead.
Phoenix butterfly on June 28, 2017:
Hello my name is....having issues in actually talking with a at the gym. At times I feel like their insecure about actually talking to a guy. That they have some sort of issue even steering at another male while working out. I've checked guys out constantly while I am there. Yet some of them just give a quick stear then turn away. I have mad confidence in myself while approaching at the gym. Especially while in the showers. There is alway that inually tread in my minds eye. Asking myself is this guy gonna freak out on me if I stear too Long or just go up and start talking to them. I sound a little feminine. Instantly you know that this men loves cock. Yet...just conversing and trying to get over those thoughts is what makes me go home mad at myself or the other guy. Even just at the gym asking for a spot is nerve racking enough. How do I get the attractive guy without having them freak out.
Zayne Austin on August 14, 2016:
Talk about a step by step on being a stalker! so creepy!