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14 Cute and Creative Ways to Ask Out a Guy Without Sounding Desperate

I've been an online writer for over eight years. I love writing about relationships, love, romance, and flirting.


You may find yourself asking, "How do I ask a guy out?" Well, there are many sweet and cute ways in which you can ask a guy out on a date and tell him that you have a crush on him. You can avoid sounding desperate by being creative, romantic, and girly. It is not weird for a girl to ask a guy out, so stop feeling nervous and afraid.

14 Ways to Ask a Guy Out

  1. Send him shy and incomplete text messages. Let him figure out what you want to say.
  2. Send a cute note by post.
  3. Find ways in which you can get his help.
  4. Ask a guy out on your birthday.
  5. Go out as friends and come back as boyfriend-girlfriend. It's sneaky, but it's cute.
  6. Give a note to a guy when you are going separate ways.
  7. Ask his best friend to introduce him to you.
  8. Make him ask you out. Play the "Do you have a girlfriend?" game.
  9. Tell your best friend to ask him out for you.
  10. Slip a note in a guy's bag to ask him out.
  11. Sit next to him on the bus.
  12. Be bold and take the direct approach to ask him out. Just say it!
  13. Ask him out by writing a short poem.
  14. Get cozy with your crush. He is yours if he makes the first move.

Even if you are a shy girl, there are ways in which you can say, "I like you," without facing an awkward situation. If he likes you back, there is no reason why he will not be your boyfriend. Below are detailed descriptions for all 14 of the methods mentioned above.

1. Send Him Shy and Incomplete Text Messages

Let him figure out what you want to say. If you are extremely shy, you can use incomplete text messages to give a guy hints that you like him. Such cute advances are generally self-explanatory, and the guy will easily pick up on your clues. Here are some examples of incomplete text messages that you can send.

  • I want to say something to you, but I don't know how to say it.
  • Can we go on a... Nevermind.
  • I have a crush on someone. Should I tell you?
  • I want to say something. But I don't know how you will react.
  • Do you know who I like in class? Umm... Nevermind.
Feeling shy? Send him flirty but incomplete messages. He will figure out that you have a crush on him.

Feeling shy? Send him flirty but incomplete messages. He will figure out that you have a crush on him.

2. Send a Cute Note by Post

Writing a full-page handwritten letter is out-of-date, especially when you haven't even begun dating a guy, but the intense cuteness of a handwritten note is still alive.

Take a small square piece of cardstock or cardboard and write "I like you" with a colorful pen. Draw a tiny rose, balloon, or a small kiss on the corner of the card. Put this in an envelope and send it to your guy by post.

Don't write your name on the card. Give the guy a heads up by telling him that you have sent him something. The expectation will create a small flutter of excitement.

3. Find Ways in Which You Can Get His Help

The easiest way to ask a guy out without sounding desperate is to think about how you can get his help. For example, if your crush is a cool geeky guy, you can ask for his help to install new software on your laptop. If he is a real estate agent, then you can ask him about the latest property prices on behalf of a fictitious friend.

The excuse of getting his help will let you meet with him more often. You can use these opportunities to impress him and get him to like you.

4. Ask a Guy Out on Your Birthday

This works best when the guy is already your friend. Be sure about your feelings, because falling in love with friends can either be extremely blissful or extremely messy.

When he comes to wish you a happy birthday and gives you a gift, flirt with him and say that no one gave you what you really wanted on your birthday. When he asks you about it, make a sweet face, and tell him that you have a crush on him. Tell him that a date with you is what you really wanted as a birthday gift.

5. Go Out as Friends and Come Back as Boyfriend-Girlfriend

If you are crushing on one of your guy friends, ask him if he wants to hang out with you at the movies or at a fast food joint. Don't tell him anything and just go as two friends hanging out with each other.

Pick a sweet moment and tell him that there was a specific reason why you called him to meet you. Be open and let him know that you don't want to remain in the friend zone any longer. Let him know that you have a big crush on him. It's sneaky, but it's cute.

6. Give a Note to a Guy When You Are Going Separate Ways

A super romantic way of asking a guy out is to give him a note just before you are going separate ways. For example, if you and your crush take separate buses from the same bus stop, hand him a note from your seat window while he is still waiting for his bus.

This way, you can avoid the awkwardness associated with the whole situation. You can look at the expression on his face as he unfolds the note and reads it while your bus starts pulling away.

Great Ideas for a First Date


1. Go to a used bookstore or library.

Free, unless you buy something.

2. Go to a flea market.

Free, unless you buy something.

3. Sing karaoke.

Depends on how much you order to drink.

4. Attend a local festival

Sometimes free. Usually no more than $20.

5. Attend a comedy open-mic.

Often free. Sometimes between $5-$10.

6. Watch a movie matinee.

Usually around $7

7. Have a Netflix double feature.

Free, assuming you have a Netflix account.

8. Bake cookies.

Depends on how hungry you are, but probably around $5 total.

Read More From Pairedlife

7. Ask His Best Friend to Introduce Him to You

This generally works well, but only if you are friends with your crush's best friend. Confess your feelings for your crush to his best pal and ask him to introduce the two of you.

The best part about taking this discreet route is that the friend will tell you upfront if you are the type of girl your crush would like to date. You can also ask questions to find out a bit more about your crush's personality, likes, and dislikes.

8. Make Him Ask You Out—Play the "Do You Have a Girlfriend?" Game

If you think that your crush likes you too, you can start a flirty conversation that eventually leads to a situation where he asks you out. Below are some questions that you should ask him when you have a chat with him on the phone or over text messages.

  • Do you have a girlfriend?
  • Why don't you have a girlfriend?
  • What would your girlfriend be like?
  • Do you like me?
  • I wouldn't mind dating you.
  • Are you asking me out?

A series of such flirty questions will help you find out if he likes you too. Keep giving hints that you have a crush on him, and by the end of the conversation, he will probably have asked you out on a date.

Tell your best friend about your crush and ask her to talk to him.

Tell your best friend about your crush and ask her to talk to him.

9. Tell Your Best Friend to Ask Him Out for You

An easy way of asking a guy out without sounding desperate is to get one of your best friends to do the job for you. Just make sure that your friend isn't prettier than you are.

Your best friend can simply walk over to the guy and ask if he has a minute to talk in private. She can then reveal that you have a crush on him. Have her mention that she thinks that the two of you would make a cute girlfriend-boyfriend pair.

10. Slip a Note in a Guy's Bag to Ask Him Out

Notes slipped into bags, wallets, and pockets have forever been a way in which lovers have expressed themselves. This is a cute and no-nonsense way to tell someone that you like them.

Write "I like you" on a simple piece of paper and fold it many times so you can hold it on the tip of your fingers. Slip it into your crush's bag or jacket pocket.

11. Sit Next to Him on the Bus

Does your crush take public transportation? If he does, make sure that you sit next to him on the bus, train, or tram. Strike up a conversation, and as you "accidentally bump" into him more often, you will get more chances to give him subtle signs that you like him.

Find excuses to do stuff together while you are on the bus. For example, you can share a sandwich together. Or you can take your tablet out and ask him if he wants to watch a movie with you. Share your headphones with him. He'll get the picture.

12. Be Bold and Take the Direct Approach to Ask Him Out—Just Say It!

Girls who are complete extroverts can just use the direct approach and ask a guy out. Boys will love it because they find themselves turned on and intimidated at the same time when a girl is direct about her feelings.

Flirt with him on the phone or in person. Look out for signs in his body language that he likes you. Muster the courage to speak your heart out and just blurt out the three words "I like you."

If you decide to take this route, you should be mentally strong and prepared to handle an instant rejection. Don't break down if he says no, just walk away.

13. Ask Him Out by Writing a Short I Like You Poem

The cutest way in which you can ask a guy out is to write a sweet poem for him. Write an introductory line to the poem and explain to him that you have a crush on him, and this is how you feel.

Keep your poem subtle, and don't sound too desperate. Don't write more than five or six lines. At the same time, you must convey that you have a crush on him and that you would like to go on a date with him. Sign off the poem with either your email or phone number and ask him to get in touch if he feels the same way.

14. Get Cozy With Your Crush–He Is Yours If He Makes the First Move

Find out if your crush likes you by getting cozy and personal with him. Start giving hints of your crush on him by sitting very close to him, standing in his personal space, and getting touchy-feely with him.

Plan a moment when you are both alone. A park is a good place to do this. Move closer and sit right next to him. If he likes you, he will immediately reciprocate by getting touchy-feely, or he may even reciprocate by giving you a cute kiss for the first time.

Limit your interaction to a cute peck, and don't get too touchy-feely. Back off and make sure that he is genuine about his feelings. When you start dating each other, don't get too intimate until you are ready to take your new relationship to that level.

More Ways to Ask a Guy Out on a Date

Method Why?

1. Have one of your friends go over and tell him you think he's cute.

This will make you an adorable coward. This way, he still has to make the bigger move.

2. Slide him a note that says, "Do you like me? (circle one) YES NO MAYBE.

It might seem ridiculous for adults, but that's the point. He might find it funny and be intrigued by your sense of humor.

3. Buy him a drink.

Since most guys don't have creeps hitting on them all the time, he might be flattered... and will definitely be able to take a hint.

4. Use a terrible pick-up line.

Since men aren't used to hearing pickup lines used on them, it's likely that he'll find the situation funny.

© 2013 princesswithapen


ashley on June 07, 2020:

this guy works at my workplace, he's new n i have a mad crush on him, we talked couple times, but i can't get him off my mind, what do i do?

Nerd on May 24, 2020:

Me and my friend are gonna go to the beach tomorrow and there's a chance that my crush might be there. I might use the Get your friend to tell him he's cute for you thing, but I'm scared.

Bel on May 15, 2020:

My crush and I talk online heaps and see each other almost everyday. But I’m super shy and he’s with our mutual friends most of the time. His friend told me that he liked me too a couple of weeks ago but I’m worried that if it was true that he gave up because I didn’t believe that he liked me. He’s really outgoing and we hang out with the same people but I’m really shy and feel quite scared to talk to him. I would really like to ask him out irl because I feel it’s sweeter, I really wanna know how to go about it. So, if anyone knows a sweet and discreet way to tell him that I like him please do tell me!

unknown on March 20, 2020:

i like this guy at school and i ride home with him every so often he is also in my footy team. i don't know whether to put a note in his bag and say i like him or see if he want's to go for a bike ride on a weekend and say i like him then. please help me

Izzy on March 06, 2020:

I'm super scared to ask him out!

Adalyn on February 05, 2020:

Thank you so, so much!!! We are officially boyfriend and girlfriend now!! I'm sooo happy!!

advice keeper on January 24, 2020:

go for it jessica. If you really like him, you shouldn't let any one hold you back, not even jack.

Jeorgiana on December 20, 2019:

I have a guy friend his name is aiden him and I have hanged out many time and played around joked around but he keeps throwing these odd hints like “I like someone here can you guess ” and he points to each person around us and say no no no and no then he gets to me and he’s silent he says he’s not going to the dance with anyone and he’s odd at times but I like him too what should I do

Mikie on December 16, 2019:

He said yes

Abbie on December 02, 2019:

Thank you for the ideas I might just tell him that I like him with a note in his bag

Kristal on November 21, 2019:

I am so scared to see him because I used the #12 which is “just ask him out” and I’m hella scared

Cheyenne Adkins on November 17, 2019:

I really like this guy but I don't know how to tell him...... What should I do?

brookelyn lindert on November 14, 2019:

i like this guy in 8th grade but i am to chicken to tell him what should i do

angelina on October 22, 2019:

I'm scared to ask a boy i like out.

ayna on September 26, 2019:


Dak on July 08, 2019:

Biss please don't ask him out.

1. He has a GF.

2. You don't know him irl.people only show their best online he could be abusive or a (very far fetched)rapist.

3. Don't risk the online friendship for something that may not be real

Susan on June 22, 2019:

I like this man who used to come to my checkout every week on a Tuesday but then my shift changed so now I'm not in work wen he comes in to do his shopping,but he is a bus driver and I sometimes see him on there,we have been chatting to each other now for about the last three weeks but I get the impression that he is shy cause I usually say hello first but once we get chatting he is fine and carries on with the conversation , a few weeks ago he did come in to where I work wen I looked up he was looking at me so I said hello and asked how he was amid he was chatty back with me then wen he was going he started to walking off and then turned round and looked at me and smiled, do u think he does like me I would love him to ask me out I've even been thinking of asking him out but don't want to scare him off.

Someone on June 02, 2019:

I have to ask my crush out on Tuesday and have no idea what to do. He has known that I like him for 6 months now, and when he first found out he told his best friend he wouldn't go out with me because of a condition I have, and his best friend then told me. I still like him and can't seem to get over him so I have to ask him out. The problem is he's one of the 'cool guys' in school, and is always hanging out with a big group of friends. I have no idea how to get him alone and ask him out face to face, as I have decided to do, as he knows how much I like him and will immediately be suspicious if I ask to talk to him alone. I know that he said he wouldn't date me because of my condition, but a lot of things that he has said and done leads me to the conclusion that he may like me, or has done in the past. I don't want to be so forward that I go up to him and ask him if he likes me, but I have no idea of how to know!! Please help and wish me luck.

Biss on May 09, 2019:

I have an Online crush what should I do? He also has a girlfriend. Although we have never met he only lives 1 hr and 45 min away. I feel like we are not connecting as much anymore but I like him ALOT. I feel weird talking to him because I'm bad at hiding my feelings. What is a cute way to ask him if he likes me? Should I tell him? Am I in over my head?

mimi on January 26, 2019:

i have been wanting to ask this guy out for months, but he is also my best friend and now i know what to do.

My name isn't Ur's to no on August 19, 2018:

I also have a boy I like I am just gonna ask him out tomorrow so wish me luck

Tarot from France on May 13, 2018:

Nice post

dashingscorpio from Chicago on February 07, 2017:

As long as women (worry) about sounding/looking desperate when it comes to dating men they will never truly be their equals.

After you get beyond a certain age being direct is the best route to take.

Truth be told I believe most women are afraid of rejection and that's the real reason why they don't want to approach men.

Note: Rejection isn't the end of the world! It saves you time. Next!

Others fear they will be taken advantage of or used because the guy knows she is romantically interested in him.

Truth be told every budding relationship is a gamble!

Take your time getting to know someone and hold true to your values. Essentially after few conversations or dates you'll have a better idea of whether this person is worth investing more time with.

Asking a guy if he wants to grab some lunch or a cup of coffee shouldn't be a case of trying to decide on whether to cut the red wire or the blue wire!

Just because you think someone is cute or hot doesn't make them any better than you! It's just a case of one human being interacting with another.

We all eat, belch, fart, and crap. No one's wearing a halo!

Thank God we live on a planet with over 7 Billion! We've got lots of options!

Landy on November 21, 2016:

I really like someone but I don't know what to tell him dat I like him. Please I need ur aid.

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