How to Tell If He Really Loves You

Updated on June 14, 2019
Tashaonthetown profile image

I love psychology. I have a strong interest in the mind and human behavior.

Is It Love?

Whether you have been dating for a few weeks, a couple of months or even years, you will be able to tell if it is love or not.

Love can be felt and it's a natural instinct to feel it.

If you are questioning his love for you, then it might mean that his love is not really there or perhaps he just doesn't know how to show it.

Loving someone with all your heart and giving them your all is a serious thing and you need to be sure that the love for you is returned. If it is not, then why waste any more of your time on the wrong person, when the right one is out there waiting to give you their all!

For those who are unsure about his love for you, there are a few signs that can give you a hint to stay in or get out.

Love can be felt in a kiss
Love can be felt in a kiss

It's in His Kiss

There are many ways to tell if he loves you. If you don't know for sure, then you can tell from certain actions that he takes.

  • A kiss can be magical and you can feel the electricity run through your body if there is an attraction.
  • He doesn't have to be a great kisser for you to feel the love. If there is passion and he feels something for you, then you will feel it in his kiss.
  • Kissing is practiced by all animals and it is a chemical reaction for them to find the perfect mate. Cats, dogs and other mammals lick each others' faces, while birds tap each others' beaks, and elephants put their trunks into each others' mouths.
  • Humans are no different and the chemical reaction that is caused from a kiss can tell you if you have a matching partner or not. Obviously if a kiss is not great and there is no chemistry then you will know immediately.
  • Scientists believe that saliva has hormones in it and serves many romantic purposes. Biological profiles connect mates together and they can be found through the saliva from a kiss.
  • Should he be kissing you with his eyes open, then he is not passionate and can be a wanderer. A passionate kiss can be felt through your entire body and it should be done with closed eyes.
  • If his kiss is sloppy and not very intimate and you can't feel anything from it, then he is not the guy for you.
  • A bad kisser doesn't matter because bad or not, love can still be felt.

Love can be seen in his eyes
Love can be seen in his eyes

Love in His Eyes

Another way to tell if he loves you back is to look into his eyes. Do you and your partner make eye contact? Have you looked deep into his eyes and seen the love his has for you?

How can you tell by staring into his eyes like a lovesick puppy? Men show their love in different ways but eyes don't lie.

  • If you are talking to him, you might notice that he is staring deep into your eyes and his pupils will dilate if he is truly in love with you.
  • Should he be looking elsewhere, then he is not interested in anything other than physical.
  • When asking him a question, you can tell if he is telling the truth by the way he moves his eyes. If he is answering and looking to his left, then it is probably a lie that he is telling you.
  • Some guys have mastered the art of the stare so beware because they might look directly into your eyes and lie with a straight face but check out the pupils to know if it is love or not.
  • A guy that is into you will be noticed looking at you and being distracted from whatever he is doing.

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In His Touch

Feelings of real love can be felt by the warmth of a touch. When he holds you tight and wants you close, then he is in love with you.

  • A guy that is attracted to you will want to hold you whether you are in public or not. He will want to hold your hand or link arms with you just to keep you close. If you are not in public and you are alone with him, then see if he is making eye contact with you and if he is wanting to hold you in some way. If he distances himself from you, then he is not in love.
  • Men who love their partners are passionate and loving, which means that they will want to hold you during a movie, hold your hand whilst walking, and hug you anytime of the day for no reason at all.
  • From that hug you can feel whether it is a cold and distant touch or a deep and intimate moment of warmth and passion.

Men in love are not afraid to hold you in public
Men in love are not afraid to hold you in public

His Behaviour

  • Naturally a man in love is a man that will do anything for you and he will be affectionate at any chance he can. Take note of his affection for you and if it looks like he is not wanting to hug you or hold you or it feels uncomfortable, then perhaps you do not have the correct chemistry together.
  • Men in love will want to shower you with affection and they will want to spoil you and treat you like you are the most important person in the whole wide world.
  • They will be proud to walk around with you, introducing you to everyone that they know, especially family.
  • Men that love their women will go shopping and return with all the things that you love or they think you might like. They will know when your birthday is, what your favourite colour is and they will show their interest in everything about you and in everything that you do.

The Way That He Communicates With You

  • A man that loves you is respectful and will never shout and scream or swear at you. Everyone gets angry sometimes and there will be one or two lovers quarrels but if he loves you, he will fight for you and he will be gentle trying.
  • Love can be felt in a conversation and the tone of a voice. If he's shaking or hesitant when he tells you he loves you, then he might faking his feelings for you.
  • Men in love will want to be open and honest with you at all times even if it hurts. They will want to make decisions that include you and you will always be the first to know what is going on.
  • People who love each other are respectful and will be able to communicate extremely well.

How to Tell If He Really Loves You

Now that you have a few simple signs to show you if he truly loves you, you can decide what to do. Love is fantastic if it is with the right person and you just know and feel when it is real or true love.

Besides the physical attributes, love can be shown in many ways and if he truly loves you he will be open and honest, loyal, respectful and loving to you all the time.

Feeling true love and eternal love is amazing and everyone deserves the chance to be with the one person in the world that puts you first, makes you feel as though you are the most important person in their lives and if he really loves you, he will be faithful and affectionate.

If you have seen some of the signs that he doesn't love you then you need to move forward because they guy that loves and adores you is still out there, waiting to shower you with affection, adoration and love, love, love!

Questions & Answers

  • We kiss a lot and we are intimate. We always have contact but he never commits his feelings towards me. Does he really love me?

    I think that if you have started an intimate relationship with someone before you have gotten to know each other, commitment might not be on the cards. Let him know that is what you want

  • Is he in love with me if he has been asking me to kiss him?

    You could probably tell from the kiss, so just kiss him and see where it goes!

  • Is he in love with me if he stares at me most of the time when we are with our friends, but has other girls?

    It could be that you are looking at him and he is then looking at you but if he has other girls then he might not be in love with you, unless he is waiting for a signal from you to make a move.

  • What signs are there to look for if a girl loves a guy, but he doesn't feel the same?

    Love is easy to feel. You can tell by a kiss! You can also look into the eyes of the one you love and if you look close enough you will see. His pupils dilate and become bigger if he likes you and a kiss from someone you love feels passionate and comfortable at the same time.

    Love is something you feel and if you have to ask this question then I think you already know the answer

  • We have dated for 8 months and we haven't kissed. He is a shy guy. Does moving slowly mean that this relationship is love?

    8 months and no kiss even for a shy guy, this sounds off. Either you are not letting him see that you want more than friendship or he is just not into you in that way.


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    • Tashaonthetown profile imageAUTHOR

      Natasha Pelati 

      6 years ago from South Africa

      Yes for everyone it is different and there are people who think money and things =love etc. I think that you just know when you are loved because it is felt in your every day life with the small things that make you feel adored.

      I love that saying and it is so true!!

    • dashingscorpio profile image


      6 years ago from Chicago

      It's a little bit of challenge for most people because each of us has our own idea of what it feels like to be loved. There is no one size fits all.

      Some people feel if their mate loves them they will "pamper them" or put (their) needs above his or her own. Others seek loads of affection/passionate sexual desire and compliments. There are also those that equate how much money someone spends on them with how much they love them. In addition there those who view jealousy and possessiveness as a sign that they're loved. Being introduced his/her inner circle of friends/family is one sign that illustrates someone is taking you seriously.

      Not long ago I heard a radio host state he always asks early on when dating someone; "How do you know when you are loved?" He said based upon their answer/expectations he knew whether or not he was the "right" mate for them. Essentially he was acknowledging that what is "important" for one person to (feel) loved may not be as important for another person.

      My favorite relationship quote comes from Oscar Wilde.

      "Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."


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