How to Tell If A Guy Doesn't Like You: 10 Signs That Let You Know He Isn't Interested
Most women know that decoding male behavior in relationships is like trying to understand string theory. Since men often have communication skills that are barely beyond the capabilities of average zoo monkeys, women are left to fend for themselves. This becomes most problematic in the arena of dating, where women find men giving off signals like malfunctioning traffic lights. Thus, it becomes almost impossible to know whether a guy likes you or hates you.
Ladies, your answers are here! This article addresses some of the most common male behaviors in dating and relationships and explains them fully, so there will be no doubt left in your mind about whether your man thinks you're great, can't stand you, finds you annoying, or thinks you're the bees knees.
- You always call him. He never calls you. This is an issue that can be very complicated. If you are calling a man over and over, leaving messages, and he never calls you, then he's not interested. If he leaves a message on his answering machine specifically telling you to stop calling, he's probably not into you. However, if you are always calling a man and he returns your phone calls, then you are probably okay. That being said, you should do some testing to see if your man will call you on occasion. For instance, call and tell him that you're taking some pills that make you really sleepy and ask if he will call you in the morning to make sure you get up or else you will miss your scheduled breast-enhancement surgery. If he does not call, then he's not into you.
- He never shows you his place or takes you anywhere near where he lives. If a guy is doing everything he can to avoid taking you anyplace where somebody he knows might see you, then you need to be suspicious. At some point, you will specifically need to request that he show you his place or take you to his favorite hang-out. If, at that time, he responds with something like "not in a million years, beaatch," he probably doesn't like you. And if he drives you to his parents house, you can reassess your interest. Also, if you are driving with him in certain parts of town and he asks you to duck down, you should probably be suspicious. Usually, a man doesn't like you that much if he asks you to duck down in a car that he is driving.
- He won't introduce you to his friends or family. This is related to #2. If you got over the hurdle of seeing his place or his favorite hang-out, but you've been dating awhile and don't know the names of any of his friends or you've been dating longer than six months and haven't met any of his family or at least heard him reference family members, you have a problem. Certainly, you should investigate the possibility that you're dating a psychopath with no family or friends, at which point you should check his freezer and his basement to make sure there aren't any severed heads lying around.
- He only hugs you with part of his body. A guy who likes you will hug you with the full force of his body. He wants you to feel everything he's got, particularly his junk. He wants you to think: "oh, man, I want this guy wrapped all around me all the time." A great hug should make you pee a little. By contrast, a guy is telling you he doesn't like you if he gives you that awful shoulder hug where only the shoulders touch. If he's making every effort not to touch you, he doesn't like you. If, as you hug him, you can feel him trying to squirm out of it, you're probably in trouble. Likewise, if you go to give your man a hug and he pats you on the back, that's no good either.
- He forgets your name. This is usually a bad sign in almost any situation, but if you two have been drinking heavily and he also can't remember his own name or where he lives, then you may just be dealing with somebody with a really bad drinking problem, in which case him forgetting your name is just another thing he can't remember when he's blitzed. However, if in the course of normal daily activities, he doesn't seem to know who you are after repeated dates and/or sexual encounters, then he probably has little regard for your relationship.
- If you do meet a friend or family member, he introduces you as "this chick who won't leave me alone". It's one thing to be apprehensive about introducing you to his family and friends. It's another thing if he doesn't introduce you as his girlfriend or, at least, somebody he's been seeing regularly. If he goes out of his way to point out to anyone outside of your relationship that you're annoying to the point of stalking him, it's a pretty safe bet to assume that he doesn't like you anymore. If he does it twice, you can be absolutely sure.
- When you go to kiss him, he turns away and vomits. Don't be reluctant to write this one off if you both like to drink heavily to the point of unconsciousness. A lot of stuff happens when you're blitzed out of your mind that can be excused - eating your own feces, losing one of your friend's children, walking naked down the middle of the highway - so vomiting after a kiss is hardly something to worry about. And really, you can probably explain away a guy vomiting after a glass of wine or something because you can have a bad reaction between alcohol and food, or maybe he has an allergy. But if your man is on an empty stomach or hasn't eaten within an hour, you can rule out food poisoning and conclude that the thought of kissing you makes him sick. This means he doesn't like you.
- When you are making love, he asks you to put a bag over your head. I realize there are lots of role-playing scenarios these days involving bags and auto-erotic asphyxiation and all, but if you are not aware that one of these games is being played, you probably should assume that he's not playing a game and just finds the sight of you repulsive. The good news is that he likes your body.
- He sleeps with your mother. This is usually a very bad sign unless your mother is just smoking hot, in which case, you might be able to explain it away as momentary weakness, particularly if you and your man aren't exclusive. Also, if he just happened to meet your mother randomly, you don't have to be as concerned about this particular issue. But if he had already met your mother and then slept with her knowing that you wouldn't approve, he's probably trying to tell you something. He's also probably realized that you and your mother don't have that great a relationship either if she was willing to sleep with her daughter's boyfriend, so it's unlikely he's going to want to be in the middle of that. However, even if he was willing to endure the inevitable fall-out, he didn't sleep with her because he likes you.
- He actually says: "I don't like you." You can excuse away all these other points, but if it comes down to it and you ask him point blank "do you like me?" and he says "no" then you've got to accept that he doesn't like you. Sure, some guys are liars but you have to figure, if a guy really likes you, there's nothing in it for him telling you that he doesn't like you, unless maybe he's hoping you'll chase him, pursue him until your love becomes a nuclear explosion that detonates and washes over the entire world with your awesome love, destroying all conflict and creating instantaneous world peace. Yes, that is definitely what he wants. Nevermind.
What is the easiest way to tell a guy doesn't like you?
Questions & Answers
I have a long-time friend that I've had a crush on but my best friend likes him and now he seems to feel the same about her too. I don't know if I should tell my friend I like him too, or not. What should I do?Helpful 1
How do I know if a boy doesn't have feelings for me?
Usually he will ignore you, not call you back, and generally not be physical.Helpful 3
How do I figure out if a guy hates me?
I think if you even have to ask that question you're already in a bad place. Remember, there are thousands of guys in the world. Move on to one where you never have to ask that question.Helpful 2
Why do men fancy a girl and then refuse to have sex later?
Are you just generalizing, because most of the time this is not the case. It also sounds like you might be British. Since I'm American, there's a cultural issue here that is hard for me to address. That said, fancying a girl and then later refusing sex when the opportunity arises could mean that the man is cheating and feeling guilty. So if he's married or has another girlfriend, he's realizing he's about to go down a road he can't return from. Once a cheater, always a cheater. That's the most likely reason. Other possible reasons include your personal hygiene or an inability to perform.
Why does a boy always annoy me even though he knows it bothers me?
Probably because he's immature and doesn't care. At some point, what he's doing is harassment.
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