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How to Flirt With a Guy on the Phone

Shadow Jackson has experience with flirty phone calls and is here to share tips for making the most of a flirtatious phone encounter.

Get flirty with him on the phone with these tips and tricks

Get flirty with him on the phone with these tips and tricks

A Guide to Flirting With a Guy Over the Phone

Why is flirtatious conversation so difficult for most of us? It is because it requires us to release our inhibitions and be free. We often look at it as an audition for a relationship, and we're afraid that we will be rejected. We think that those girls who have boyfriends must be great conversationalists, or they have some secret that the rest of us don't know.

Trying to come up with something to say on the phone can be so nerve-racking at times. Sometimes, it feels easier to just say nothing at all or avoid that phone call altogether rather than try to have a decent conversation. Well, I'm here to tell you that you too can have a memorable conversation with the man of your dreams. These 8 simple rules are your ticket to flirting heaven!

Has This Ever Happened to You?

Have you ever had this problem? You and a hot guy you meet exchange phone numbers. You call him, or he calls you. Once you're on the phone, you don't know what to say! You freeze up. After a number of awkward silences, you two finally hang up the phone, and you conclude that it was the single most embarrassing experience you have ever had!

8 Rules for Flirting With a Guy on the Phone

Here are six rules you should follow to have a fun and flirty phone convo with a guy.

Rule #1: Relax

Flirting with a guy is not a chore. It's not a job. It's not an audition. It's fun! You should look at it as a break from a stressful day, a time to unwind. It can be a game. There is no need to be tense or uptight about it. Don't put too high of expectations on a simple conversation. That is counter-productive to the flirting process.

Don't start off by asking "how much money do you make," "how many kids do you have," "what is your religion," or any other questions that are far too personal. There is a rule of thumb when flirting. It goes, stay away from religion and politics and when in doubt, talk about the weather.

If you need to drink a glass of wine in order to relax, have some. Feel free to slip into something more comfortable. Take off your shoes, let down your hair. The more comfortable you feel, the more comfortable you'll sound on the phone.

Rule #2: Encourage Him to Talk About Himself

The easiest application to this rule is to start a conversation off with "So, what are you doing?" This is after you've said "hello," of course. This is an open-ended question that can lead to an entire conversation on pastimes, hobbies, and the virtue of these.

Avoid arguing (until you know him better). Simply ask him questions about the things he says. This will show that you are interested in him and his ideas. You are essentially saying, by your actions, that he is a really interesting person, thus giving him a compliment which is flirting rule number three.

Rule #3: Compliments Are Key

It could be as subtle as giggling at his witty remark or as blatant as saying, "You're so funny," but either way you do it, a man loves to have his ego stroked. I would advise that you let him dominate the conversation, but if you find yourself talking for a long time, stop and say, "Wow! You're such a good listener!"

Rule #4: Talk About Shared Experiences

If you have known him for a little while and you have met him and enjoyed his company, bring up the things you enjoyed about the experience. Saying "Remember the time we got caught in the rain . . ." or whatever the experience will make him think of you. Anything that makes him think of you is a good thing when flirting. But remember, only bring up good memories. Bad memories will have a negative effect, and he will associate you with uncomfortable emotions.

Rule #5: Talk About Your Body

This is the one rule that tells you explicitly what to say. Doing this will put images of your body into his mind. This is a form of foreplay. It is subtly erotic and suggestive. Don't be too graphic; this is not phone sex! Give yourself a compliment, or make him compliment you, thus causing him to inadvertently fantasize about your body.

Here's a line that always works: "I've been working out a lot lately, and I'm afraid that my butt may be shrinking." This makes him think about your butt and gives him an open to give you a compliment such as "Your butt looks great to me!"

Rule #6: Make Plans

Have you ever gotten off the phone with someone and felt that the conversation was just wasted? Nothing was achieved; it was just a series of uncoordinated ramblings. That is why making plans is a great idea. It gives the conversation a purpose, it connects the two people engaged in conversation and it's a great flirting tactic! It tells the person you're talking to that "I want to spend some more time with you."

You can initiate the plan-making by saying, "We should totally hang out," or something of that nature. Making the plans can range from saying, "I can't wait to talk to you again" (thus arranging another conversation) to organizing a date. When making plans, it is best to be as specific as possible and set dates.

"See you later" is not as effective as "I'll call you tomorrow." "We should hang out sometime" does not imply the same commitment as "My friend is throwing a party next weekend, and I would love for you to come with me." Making plans is crucial to an effective flirtatious encounter because it sets the stage for another encounter.

Rule #7: Eliminate Distractions

Turn off the TV/radio. Don't sit in front of the computer. Make sure the kids are asleep or at day care or school. Get the chores done first. Do not let anything distract you from this conversation. If you seem too distracted during a conversation, it can be a HUGE turn-off. It shows that he is not important to you.

Rule #8: Observe the Following Flirting Don'ts

We have talked about what you should do to have a flirtatious conversation. Here is a list of things you should not do when flirting on the phone:

  • Do NOT burp into the phone!
  • Do NOT eat while on the phone!
  • Do NOT chew gum while on the phone! The sound of you smacking gum is irritating.
  • Do NOT use the bathroom while on the phone! Do you really want him to hear you pee, or worse, hear you grunting while taking a dump?
  • Do NOT talk excessively about your past relationships!
  • Do NOT monopolize the conversation!
  • Do NOT argue with him about things that are obviously important to him, such as religious views.
  • Do NOT insult him. There is a fine line between playfully teasing someone and insulting someone. Stay as far away from that line as possible!

Good Luck!

If you follow all of these rules, you should have a successful flirting encounter. Feel free to leave me a comment telling me how successfully you applied these rules or even let me know of some tricks you came up with on your own.