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How to Date White Men

Iman deeply loved her husband David Bowie.

Iman deeply loved her husband David Bowie.

Are you an African-American woman interested in going interracial? You are in good company, because vanilla guy/chocolate girl couples are hot and on the upswing!

Learning how to date white men is as simple as brushing up on some dating tips to make the process fun, lighthearted, and safe.

Be Outgoing

White men can be shy. They have been trained by society to watch their aggression towards women. This usually translates to them waiting for your signal.

So smile sweetly, make eye contact, and start small talk. You will make it easier for men to feel comfortable enough to ask you out.

Watch out for: White men who won't make eye contact with you, look away when you talk, or disengage from a conversation quickly. He could be married, involved, or not the one for you. Don't waste your time. Go find another white man who would love your attention.

"So smile sweetly, make eye contact, and start small talk. You will make it easier for men to feel comfortable enough to ask you out."

Seek Out Men With a Diverse Group of Friends

If you see a good-looking white man that has Asian, Hispanic, or black friends, chances are he will be open to interracial dating.

Watch out for: A white man who has a long string of failed relationships with black women. Some white men like the idea of dating a beautiful black woman but aren't interested in marriage. Chances are the women before you found that out.

A man who does this is likely to do this with white women too. He is being a playboy. When they say you shouldn't hate the player that you should hate the game: no, you should hate the player too. Players can mess up your life way too easily.

Don't Expect to Pay

If you go out on a date with a white man, don't expect to pay for the date or for yourself. Even though when the check comes, it is nice if you say, "Can I help you with that?"

It is a gesture of courtship and economic standing that a man should pay for the first date and for many or most of the dates thereafter.

Watch out for: On the first few dates, a man who isn't interested in you as a potential partner will ask you to at least pay for yourself or he will be stingy with courtship gestures.

Run the other way if this happens. You don't want to mess with a man who doesn't like you or is so-so about you.

Show Your Feminine Side

Part of the fun in finding a great white guy is the thrill of luring him in with your charms.

So ditch the pants, don't curse in regular conversation if you normally do, and don't be afraid to wear makeup that highlights your best features.

Lots of men like girly-girls—white, black, Asian, everyone!

Watch out for: Keep away from those miniskirts and clear heels! Soft and feminine gives off a good impression. If you are into delicate jewelry, knee-length dresses, and short manicured nails, this will show off you are a class act!

Don't Sleep With Him Early On

Yes, we are all human and we all have needs. But don't feel pressured to sleep with a man just because there is a "three-date-rule" out there in the universe, or because you know how quickly your friends tend to sleep with a guy.

You need to know this man is for you and you only.

Watch out for: A white guy that wants to "try out" black women or only wants to sleep with you to see what it's like. This means he isn't serious about you as a woman or as a potential partner. You can never build a relationship with this kind of man.

Have Fun!

Understanding how to date a white man simply comes down to the rules it takes to build a strong foundation with men in general.

As a woman, you have both the allure and the smarts to get a man who will be totally into you.

A lot more women are getting down with the swirl to find the one. Have fun with dating, and I hope you find the love of your life!

Questions & Answers

Question: Where can I find a white guy to date?

Answer: You can try online interracial dating sites. That might be the easiest way, because you know the person is looking to date a black woman before you ever meet him.

Question: How do I know the guy is really white?

Answer: If you are concerned about being catfished, you would really need to video chat or see him in person. Unless you mean you aren't sure if he is white even in person. There is a wide range of white ethnicities, including Mediterranean people and Near Eastern people (like Armenians), some of whom are pale, some of whom have olive or brownish skin. In this case, you could have a conversation to find out his ethnic background.

Question: How can I text a white guy so as he is interested?

Answer: Just be casual and friendly with a hello or greeting to start. Text him as you would any other race of guy. Also, only respond or text as much as he texts you. He should be doing at least half of the legwork in communication.