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How Women Can Create an Aura of Beauty to Attract Men

Updated on May 18, 2017

Aura

Aura: The distinctive atmosphere or quality that seems to surround and be generated by a person.

Attracting men has everything to do with our “aura” or the quality we emanate. In fact, whenever you come across a man whose attention you want to attract, you may be surprised to discover that you don’t have to do all that much when you're around him. It’s all about how you do whatever you're doing in that moment when an interesting man is nearby. As the French say, it’s all about your “je ne sais quoi,” (that indefinable, intangible quality that makes something distinctive or attractive) The truth is, most men are going to sum you up in a few short seconds, before you even have a chance to say, "Hello." Consequently, it is important that you maintain an awareness of the image you are projecting in each given moment.

More often than we know, some of our habits are encouraging his indifference rather than his interest. So, before we begin, first know that we all do certain things unconsciously. Sometimes our mannerisms and ways of being act against us. Consequently, you must ask yourself, “What is it that I might be doing unknowingly to keep men at bay?”

For example, I've known women who constantly point their forks at the person they're sitting across from while dining. I assume they do this automatically, out of habit. What I do know is that this pointing the fork thing is really distracting, not to mention "tacky." No one wants a fork pointed right at their face. It’s annoying. This may seem like a nitpicky, tiny thing, but it really does matters how you eat, how you talk, and even if you point.

Anyway, the most important factor to keep in mind when we wish to attract a man is to create an "aura of intrigue" in a such a way that it leaves a positive and subtle impression on the observer. In other words, you never want to be too obvious or seem as if you are desperate for attention. Subtlety is the key.

Begin new habits that work for you!
Begin new habits that work for you!

The first step is to change our undesirable habits. We do this by reminding ourselves that we are being noticed, even if for a split second. Frankly, it matters that we emit a positive and interesting vibe. By developing an aura of natural confidence we are also more likely to weed out undesirable men. How so?

Insecure men do not like engaging with women who actually like themselves. In a way, this is a good thing---you won't have to bother with such men because your self confidence will threaten him. Thus, he will fade away into the background, where he belongs. Therefore, it is worthwhile to do some self-tweaking and fine tuning by noticing our habits, whether bad or good, so that we can pare down our habits to those which only give impressions that always work in our favor. The vibes you give out are crucial if your are to pique the interest of a quality man.

Tweaking your habits is simply another step in developing a positive aura. There will come a time when you will not have to think about how you are being perceived by others---your improved habits will have become second nature, and you will do things quite beautifully, naturally and easily. You will have developed an understated sensuality which, in turn, will generate a "perfect aura" of attractiveness.

The following six qualities will allow any woman to catch a man's attention in a subtle and powerful way:

Shoulders Back

Perfect posture
Perfect posture

In keeping your back straight and your chin up, you radiate an air of self assurance. We all know that confidence is an exceptionally appealing trait. Even if you don’t feel sure of yourself, keep that spine straight! Long story short, great posture always makes you look more fascinating. If you are not used to holding your head high, do it anyway! Having beautiful posture is a non-negotiable; it is also, without question, one of the traits that men say they notice most about a woman---besides a nice body. But right now, we’re talking about your bearing and your essence, not your lean or curvy body.

A quality man has no interest in a woman who slouches. He regards her as lazy, and if there is one thing men hate, it's a lazy woman. It makes sense. Are you attracted to lazy men? Basically, if a man sees a woman whose body language seems to indicate that she doesn't care about herself, he will be turned off within 2 seconds or less. So straighten those shoulders ladies; he is noticing more about you than you may realize. Again, it is imperative that you make those first seconds count in your favor.

Watch That Stride!

Practice makes perfect!
Practice makes perfect! | Source

I've heard men say, "It almost seemed as if she floated across the room, and I couldn't take my eyes off of her." That is the kind of attention you want to aim for. Wherever you happen to be, when you are walking, if you're not owning that space, something is wrong. Walking well gives you "presence" and charisma. A quality man is attracted to a woman who walks beautifully. When you are in "best walk" mode, rest assured, you are turning heads. A focused, yet relaxed stride is a valuable and easy tool you must use to get him to notice you right away. Do not walk too slowly, or too fast... just a good even stride.

You might even decide to pause, and turn here or there, just pivoting a bit... something unusual has caught your attention, or maybe you have to check the time or adjust your bracelets. In other words, you are providing your admirers with a quick snapshot---a moment in time for them to savor. You are providing him with a small mini-movie and leaving him with a memory he will not quickly forget. You will feel fairly confident that the next time he sees you, he will remember you, and he'll do more than just watch you walk by. By this time, he is eager to introduce himself.

How's Your Body Language?

Lovely body language.
Lovely body language.

Your attitude shows up on your face and in your body language. Do you seem like someone ho finds life interesting? This is important. In order to look as if you find life remarkable and enjoyable, it is always a good idea to practice maintaining a slight smile, the kind that makes your eyes crinkle ever so slightly. Think Mona Lisa, or bigger if you like. Mona Lisa looks as though she finds life rather amusing; she is infinitely calm, yet mysterious---and that is a striking combination. No man wants to be around a woman who is bored, agitated or unfriendly. Depressed or angry women drive men away in droves.

Another way to practice excellent body language is to have awareness of your hands. Are they relaxed, or are they clenched? Tense hands indicate a closed, stubborn, or unhappy personality. Women who seem inflexible make men crazy, and not in a good way. However, if your palms are open and your wrists exposed, this small thing projects a more welcoming aura. In other words, an aura of calmness draws men toward you. Women too, are attracted to men who are relaxed and have who an easy way about them. In fact, everyone is drawn to people whose body language is quietly confident, reassuring and warm.

Own Your Space (Like You Mean It)

Owning her space
Owning her space | Source

Whether you are walking, standing, or sitting, it is essential that you become comfortable in making the space you occupy all your own, whether you are alone or with others. To do this, you must not give any impression of discomfort, i.e., downcast eyes or self hugging. Instead, be "in the present" and enjoy your surroundings right now. This is what it means to own your space. It's all about stopping to smell the roses, so to speak. Another way of putting it is: You have to become totally at ease in choosing to make yourself the queen of your space. Frankly, in any given moment, the area you occupy really does belong to you, so use it generously. You are much more likely to attract the right man if you appear to be someone who feels relaxed in her own skin.

Initially, you might not feel confident with the idea of taking up any extra space, but it doesn't really matter---just act like you do anyway. Eventually your discomfort will disappear. Just keep your chin up, and most people will not suspect your anxiety. In any event, it is natural to feel a bit of shyness in taking up your given space when you first begin practicing this important art of attraction. The good news is, in time you won't even remember why your once felt any nervousness about owning your space. So begin now. I encourage you to first learn to appreciating any small, but pleasurable detail about your surroundings---the crispness in the air, the smell of herbs in your food, the beauty of a clear sky, whether you are surrounded by a plethora of people or none at all.

A specific and very useful example of owning your own space is when you choose to dine alone. Many women will not do this, but what better way to make yourself available to an interesting admirer than for you to enjoy a perfectly comfortable, leisurely lunch alone. I saw a man do this once when I was dining with my brother and other family members. Both my brother and I, who were teenagers at the time, were awestruck by this this unique man who dined as if he had all the time in the world. He was a master at owning his space. He wasn’t checking his watch or devouring a novel. He was eating, slowly. He savored his wine and then sat back to better appreciate the quiet hubbub of the servers and guests on the patio; He was incredibly relaxed. Somehow, he was impressive and charming at the same time. I have never forgotten the impact this stranger made upon me. I was just out of high school, but this stranger changed me forever.

Preen, A Little Bit . . .

Preen: to dress or smooth oneself. (Merriam Webster)

Preening goes back to taking up your space – sort of, but it’s a highly female thing to do. Men truly love seeing a woman preen a little, not in an overly obvious or vulgar way. Ever. Good preening requires subtlety. No need to overdo it. You're simply "smoothing your feathers." Indeed, preening gets to the heart of flirting and in creating an aura of mystique.

For example, suppose you’re sitting somewhere, say at a cocktail party, and plenty of interesting men are milling about. Now is your time to preen. You can decide to smooth your skirt... simply run your hand from thigh to knee (while he’s watching, of course), or you might adjust the strap of your high heel ever so slightly, and then gently splay your fingers softly from ankle to mid-calf. Just checking, you know... to see if everything is in place. You’re preening a little.

Preening
Preening

Whatever you do, be natural. After all, you really do have to smooth that skirt or adjust the strap of your high heels. Now… can you picture him peering at you out of the corner of his eye, his eyebrow raised in awareness, curiosity… and desire? Of course you can. Now we’re getting somewhere. Whatever preening you do, don’t rush, and don’t look around to see who’s watching. Simply own your space, mind your own business, and smooth away. This is an excellent way to draw men toward you. You are creating anticipation "in the air" and causing him to be pulled toward you.

Preening is great fun. Use your imagination. There are a million ways to preen "a little." So, whenever the opportunity presents itself, take advantage of this newly acquired attraction skill. A word of warning. Never be overtly sexual. You want a man to realize that you have a mind, not just a body. You never want to attract the wrong kind of men, so be a class-act. Always.

Another tip: Applying makeup (of any kind) is best left for the powder room. Lining your lips in public is not sexy; it’s actually sort of tacky---so don’t think you’ll draw the worthwhile man’s attention that way. You won’t. However, if you preen well, you will definitely pique his interest and desire... in a good way. At the end of the day, he'll be thinking of your poise, intelligence, and yes, your sex appeal---and that, after all, is your goal,

Knowing How to Do . . . .

Preening beforehand...
Preening beforehand...

This is part of preening, except that it is what you do on your own, before you go out into the world where you’ll likely run into that special man. First of all, you must have a good hair cut, even if it means having to spend a little extra money on a stylist who knows what he is doing. A good hair style will do wonders for your self esteem, besides bringing out the symmetry of your face. Once we've done everything we can to take care of our outward appearance, we become more confident and our "inner spark" casts an almost magical spell, which then makes us more approachable.

Secondly, always try to wear clothes that are somewhat form fitting, but not too tight and never baggy – you don’t want to look like you’re revealing too much or hiding too much. In other words, give the sweats and the shapeless dress a break every now and again, and wear something pretty. Also, don't worry if you are carrying some extra weight. You can still show your curves!

Finally, always look polished. Wear that bright nail polish on your toes - maybe a luminous hot pink, a blazing orange, or a bright torquoise. Put on those beautiful bracelets that give off a pleasant sound when you gesture with your hands. I'm serious... men ache for these little touches of femininity.

It's all about developing some "Savoir-faire" which literally means, "knowing how to do." And once you do, you will have no difficulty in getting the attention of desirable men. You don't have to bend over backwards or flutter your eyelashes to attract him. Rather, you simply have to create a tiny bit of mystique to draw him in.

Long story short, please realize that meeting worthwhile men is not so complicated after all. Catching the attention of men has everything to do with our way of being, our mannerisms, our enjoyment of life, and our femininity. This is what it means to create an "aura of beauty." Today, you can begin attracting men the natural, uncomplicated way. You don't have to wait another day. Start exploring your natural charm. Be a class-act. Trust me when I say that he is dying to know the "beguiling you." He would love nothing better than to be drawn in by your lovely self, the one who is as natural and fascinating as the space you so graciously inhabit.

And by the way, once he approaches you, look him straight in the eyes, show some teeth...and smile.

Happy knowing....Savvy

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    • Bedbugabscond profile image

      Melody Trent 4 years ago from United States

      Great advice. For me the problem is posture. I have poor posture because I have been sick most of the winter and lost a lot of muscle. I am going to have to figure out which exercises will fix my posture!

    • savvydating profile image
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      savvydating 4 years ago

      Thanks for commenting Bedbugabscond. You might start with stretching exercises. Perhaps once you get more flexibility, you will be able to keep your back and shoulders straight. Also, doing some exercise for the abdominal area is also helpful for the back muscles. Just start slow and work you way up, if needed. Good posture is really important in catching his attention, so don't lose heart.

    • profile image

      Megarun 4 years ago

      I love the idea of owning your space--any space I'm in will be MY space from here on out!

      Fierce stuff Savvy!

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 4 years ago

      Hi Megarun! Thanks for dropping in again. Well, I have just one thing to say, " You' had better." But seriously, there's nothing like owning your space like you own the place. Hey, I made a rhyme. :)

    • AmandaJon profile image

      Amanda Jones 3 years ago

      Savvydating, nice job! Interesting, practical and informative. Thanks to tell these things.

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 3 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      A smile surely attracts men and most men, How Women Can Create an Aura of Beauty to Attract Men has a great list attractions to men and all works perfectly great hub! Voted up and useful.

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 3 years ago

      Hi DDE. Time and again, I've had men tell me they appreciate women who are feminine. That thread of thought is found throughout many of my hubs. I truly appreciate the votes, by the way.

    • profile image

      Annie 2 years ago

      I loved this I have been doing allot of research on how to people have that certain quality that attracts men and think this is the most helpful. Many websites make you watch an hour long video to find out in the end that you have to pay money for the real secrets which is not right. This gives you simple steps with an effect. Thanks for some great tips! :)

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 2 years ago

      Hi Annie,

      Thanks for dropping by. You've paid me a high compliment... as it is my goal to help all women to better understand their value and strengths. I'm thrilled to know my little article is of help. Yea!

      PS That being said, all of these steps have worked for me over the years--and really well at that. ;)

    • FlourishAnyway profile image

      FlourishAnyway 2 years ago from USA

      I love your emphasis on confidence and owning your space. Women need to be cognizant of the signals they're sending. It'll pay off in dividends.

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 2 years ago

      Hi FlourishAnyway. Thank you for sharing the hub! I'm happy that you enjoyed that particular section--about owning your space. It really does pay off where men are concerned, but I will say that sometimes some "petty" women will get a little catty about it...but that's there problem and not ours. As always, I appreciate your insight about the positive and confident signals we send out.

    • brakel2 profile image

      Audrey Selig 2 years ago from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

      I enjoyed this hub tremendously, as it reminds me of the importance of confidence in the dating scene and in other circumstances. You have great ideas of the subtle things women can do to get the attention of men. Some women are naturals. but others must work at it. Thanks for sharing your ideas, Pinning hub. Blessings, Audrey

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 2 years ago

      Well, hello brake12. It's true that some women are naturals. The good news is that good habits can be learned with enough commitment. It's worth the extra effort--for sure!. Also, Aubrey, I thank you for pinning. I'm delighted that you enjoyed the hub.

    • profile image

      Brian 2 years ago

      Preening is cool. It's a subtle touch and gets me interested.

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 2 years ago

      Hi Brian,

      So glad you agree. Truth be told, that's a "must-do" if a woman really wants to be more than just another pretty face or even, "ordinary." Thanks for chiming in. I appreciate it!

    • profile image

      gk 2 years ago

      I've been looking into things to keep my marriage solid, and I figured I should keep him attracted to me. I ended up here. You reminded me of just how important confidence is! He used to tell me all the time when we started dating how much he loved my confidence. Love these tips! :)

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 2 years ago

      Thank you, gk. I think it is good to remain attractive for our husbands and ourselves, for that matter. Men enjoy our femininity. Too many women overlook that, which is why I tried to be specific in sharing some tips. I'm so glad you stopped by to comment. I've no doubt your marriage will survive the test of time, and I appreciate your mentioning that it was your confidence that drew him to you and kept him interested..

    • Jewels profile image

      Jewels 20 months ago from Australia

      Hmmmm! Good tips, thanks :)

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 20 months ago

      Well, with five brothers in your life, some of this stuff might seem "unique"....but it's really quite universal---though less so nowadays. However, it's all great fun! Here's to our feminine side. Nice to have you stop by Jewels. (Great name)

    • temptor94 profile image

      Ritu Temptor 20 months ago from India

      Great tips! I have come across many articles that have give all kinds of advices, but none that talk about the aura and owning our space.. these are critical in attracting the right kind of people. You have described everything very clearly and precisely, loved reading your hub! :)

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 20 months ago

      Why, thank you.....and how delightful it is to have a visitor from India. What a small world it is after all!

    • profile image

      Jade 4 months ago

      This is a brilliant article, thank you. My whole life I had plenty of male attention I took for granted until a couple of years ago - I was broken hearted after a break up. Ever since then, all the male attention I previously thought I would always have completely evaporated. I realise from this article that I lost the natural happy and feminine things I used to do as I lost touch with myself a little. I used to walk slower, take my time with things, wear jewellery that would give that tinkle etc. Since my break up, I filled the void with work and projects and as a result am rushing around everywhere, thinking business. Although I take care of my appearance, I miss the little touches as always thinking about how to best utilise my time, to fill it up so I don't spend time dwelling on the past, rather than taking and owning my time. Thank you so much for making me realise what it is so clearly. This article is a blessing.

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 4 months ago

      Jade....So very glad you found this article at this crucial time in your life. How kind of you to call it "brilliant." I am flattered. But I hear you. I was used to plenty of attention as well. In my case, I started getting "older," so I had to remind myself of all the things I had been doing differently than a fair amount of other ladies. The good news? Those things still work. Ha!

    • profile image

      Felix 4 months ago

      Knowing the top secret of the opposite sex will give a chance of knowing the good from the pretenders. lovely articles

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 4 months ago

      Hello Felix....I hadn't thought of it quite that way, but you make an interesting point. I am glad you enjoyed the article. Thank you for sharing your observation.

    • profile image

      Argh 4 months ago

      Just kill me now. So...I have to be fake and over the top to get men to notice I exist. I really want to laughcryrage at this world.

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 4 months ago

      Argh....How is it fake to be a natural woman? Are you saying you are a tomboy? All well and good. But you are still a woman. Don't forget that.

    • profile image

      Sam 3 months ago

      Hello, thank you for the article, its very interesting. What does it indicate if a woman flips through her hair while talking to you?

    • profile image

      Sam 3 months ago

      I always wonder why some women walk down the pathway the wrong side (in the office or elsewhere, I notice that behaviour mostly from women), should a gentleman get out of her path Or make her move over to the other side? What do women think of men who let them have their way and those that don't move over to accommodate them?

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 3 months ago

      Hi Sam...So glad you liked the article. Flipping the hair, in conjunction with smiling and eye contact may indicate mild flirting. But hair flipping alone does not indicate interest. Some women are overly obsessed with appearance, and as such, may have developed the hair flipping thing as a nervous habit. Long story short, it depends upon the rest of her body language.

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 3 months ago

      I am not entirely clear on what you mean by 'wrong pathway.' We all set out to walk where ever we need to go and I've not heard of any pathway we are supposed to take.

      If you mean that she is walking toward you on the side of the hallway where you happen to be walking, then it is polite for the man to move. The key is to see it as your choosing to have manners.

      Are you saying that this particular woman is known to be rude, in general??

      Anyway, if a man never moved for me, I would write him off as someone who is lacking in manners or who never learned the value of being a gentleman.

      Keep one thing in mind, adopting the mindset of a gentleman makes a man a cut above the rest. That's a good thing!

    • profile image

      Sam1976 3 months ago

      Thank you for your answer, much appreciate. In my office there are narrow walkways / paths and the accepted practice is to walk on ones right hand side. The particular woman is not known to be rude at all, however, I once walking on what I perceive was the right side to walk on and had to get out of her path a split sec before we could collide. Since then I decided to always move out of their path. I once had to speak with her for some work related reason and found her very pleasant and cooperative. I work in Riyadh (KSA) and there are a lot of brave Arab / Western women working here and teaching us men some office manners :-). Thanks again for your feedback.

    • savvydating profile image
      Author

      savvydating 3 months ago

      You are welcome, Sam. I will only add that I have had no objection to moving out of the way, from time to time, but it is always nice if the man moves. In addition, my office building has 22 floors. It is customary for the men to allow the women to enter and exit from the elevator before they do. It is just one of those very nice pleasantries which I appreciate very much. Often, I will murmur a quick, "Thank You" to the man or men.

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