Sadie Holloway is a workshop facilitator who teaches interpersonal communication skills to help people strengthen their relationships.
Find Out if He Is the One You’ve Been Waiting For
We all know that at the start of a fresh new relationship, the first few days, weeks, and months together as a couple can be a lot of fun. You may feel excited every time you think about seeing your new boyfriend. You may find yourself talking non-stop about your new love to everyone and anyone who will listen. You may even find yourself imagining what it might be like to spend the rest of your life with this man. But none of those things are necessarily signs that you are falling in true love with your partner.
Here are five ways to tell if the person you are dating could be your soul mate.
1. Neither of You Are on the Rebound
This tip about finding your soul mate is especially important for people who are making a fresh start in the love department. You can’t start to form a true love relationship if one of you hasn’t fully moved on from a previous relationship.
There’s a big difference between rebound love and true love. Rebound love is when you start a relationship with someone new because you are afraid of being alone after a break-up. You may even have fantasies that if you go out and start a relationship with someone new, the person you thought was your true love will get jealous and want you back. Unfortunately, if making someone jealous is the only way you think you can get your ex back, than your ex wasn’t your true love. And you weren’t your ex’s true love either. True love does not rely on manipulation to succeed.
2. When You Are With Your Soul Mate, He Makes You Feel Good About Yourself
Even when you argue with your partner, you can still disagree without putting each other down. Being with your soul mate means that through good times and bad times you still believe in one another and support each others’ dreams. If the person you are in a relationship with tries to makes you feel insecure, self-conscious, or nervous about pleasing him, then he’s not your soul mate.
3. A Strong Sign That He Is Your Soul Mate Is When You Know That You Would Be Really Great Friends Even if You Weren’t Romantically Involved
True love thrives in relationships that are based on the same qualities that make strong friendships last a lifetime;
- Respect for differences of opinion
4. If You and Your Boyfriend Have Shared Life Goals, Then That Is a Sign That He Could Be Your Soul Mate
It’s not the only sign that he is your soul mate, but it is an important one. You and your soul mate should have shared life goals and common values. When you are just starting out in a new relationship, it isn’t always easy to tell if you and your new companion have similar life goals. That type of intimate awareness about your lover develops over time. When you are truly in love, your most important dreams and desires tend to sync up over time.
If, on the other hand, you too easily accept the other person’s life goals as your own in your new relationship, you are merely going along with what the other person wants, perhaps because you think it will bring you closer together. Blindly following another persons’ life goals without seeing how they fit into your own, isn’t true love. It’s infatuation, also known as being in love with love. Just because you are making a fresh start with a new relationship, that doesn’t mean you should throw out all the “old” things you believe in and value! Your soul mate wouldn’t ask you to give up doing something that makes you feel happy and fulfilled. Why? Because if he is your soul mate, he knows that letting you be happy is the only way two halves can become a whole. If either of you feel that you are living half the life that you want to, then things in your relationship will never add up.
5. When You Have Met Your Soul Mate, You Aren’t in a Big Rush to ‘Make Things Happen’ in Your Relationship
That’s because true love is about having faith that your new relationship will unfold as it should, at a pace that is natural and comfortable for the both of you. Infatuation on the other hand, involves focusing on short-term wants and desires. True love is about letting the new relationships grow and evolve overtime. There is no stopwatch ticking over your heads. There is no need to make hasty, rash decisions. Focusing on mutually satisfying long-term life goals is key to making true love last.
No matter how many signs are flashing in your face that he's the one for you, there is one sign to watch out for: the sign that he is already in a committed relationship. That doesn't mean that he isn't someone who you have a strong connection with. But it does mean that you aren't meant to be together at this time. As disappointing as it may be to see signs that he is your soulmate and then find out that he is already attached to someone else, pursuing a relationship with someone who isn't available is not a healthy thing to do--for you, for him, or for the one he is with. If it is meant to be, it will be. The universe will make what is meant to happen, happen. And remember, there's no law that says you only get one soulmate in life. You may suddenly see signs that someone else, someone unexpected is another one of your soulmates.
Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.
Soul Mate or Sole Mate?
© 2014 Sadie Holloway