Advice on Dating: Does She Like Me? - How to Know If She's Interested
Does She Like Me, or Is It an Illusion?
For men, understanding women is like trying to bench press a hippo; it's almost impossible. Women are a mystery to the male mind, an enigma that our rational minds must solve.
Unfortunately, that will never happen. It is an enigma that will remain as long as the human race remains. Women will always remain a mystery, and men will always stand around scratching their heads trying to figure them out. Men will always be asking that age old question, "Does she like me, or is it all in my mind?"
Even though that may be the case, there are still a number of signs that women display to show us bewildered men that she's interested.
According to psychologist Albert Mehrabian in a discussion on ways people are attracted to one another, verbal responses account for 7% of that attraction, tone of voice accounts for 38%, and body language accounts for 55%.
In other words, don't rely only on what a woman is saying to know if she's into you or not. Listen to the tone of her voice, and more importantly, pay close attention to her reactions.
The following points highlight the key areas to watch for and will explain briefly why they are important.
Advice on Dating: The Top Signs that Show She's Interested
- She shows it through her body language. Positive body language is a strong indicator that she's into you. If she likes you, she'll show it through the way she acts and through how she positions her body when she's with you. Eye contact, gently leaning in towards you when you talk, playing with her hair, touching her face; these are the types of things that she'll do when she's interested.
- She listens to you and asks questions. In her eyes, you stand out from the crowd. You have something interesting to say, and she's hooked. By itself, this doesn't indicate that she's attracted to you in a romantic way, it only means that she's highly interested in you as a person. Remember, all of these things go together. She has to be interested in you as a person in order for her to be attracted to you romantically.
- She's relaxed/She stands close to you. This means she trusts you.She isn't afraid to be herself around you. Through your actions and your body language, you've made her feel valued as a human being, and not just as a one night stand.
- She playfully hits you or touches you. This is called flirting. Most people have a natural desire to keep others out of their personal space. You know how it is; how many times have you felt uncomfortable when a strange person gets too close to you? We only let those in who we are more comfortable with. When a woman is attracted to you, she feels comfortable enough with you that she'll initiate moving into your space, or she'll allow you into hers.
- She giggles. Typically, giggling is a mixture of attraction and nervousness. When a woman laughs, it means that she has found something funny to laugh at. When she giggles, it's more personal, more in depth; it's like she's released her inner child for a brief moment. She's a little nervous, a little shy, but not so much that it incapacitates her. She finds you attractive and can respect your sense of humor.
- She playfully calls you names. She's teasing you. When a woman calls you crazy, or silly, or funny, or even cute, there's a good chance she's into you. It's the same way we used to play as children: running around the playground, catching cooties from the girls, poking fun at them because we secretly like them. The adult world really isn't that different. Only this time, we want to catch cooties.
- She's available. If a woman is interested in you, she will make herself available. In other words, she'll give you her phone number or email address, and will quickly rush to answer or return your call. When you offer her an opportunity to hang out with you, she will just as quickly accept - even if she already had plans. If she couldn't break those plans, then she'll offer another day in exchange.
- She keeps "popping up". So maybe you're wondering whether someone you've known for awhile is interested. In addition to the above points, this woman will keep "popping up" everywhere you go. Unless you're on a college campus, or live in a very small town, this generally doesn't happen that often. Occasionally, it does, but if she maneuvers her way through a crowd just to be close to you, or finds out that you're going to the pool hall and shows up exactly the same time you do, there's a good chance she's into you.
- She gives you her number or asks you to hang out. The only reason a woman would either give you her phone number, email or other contact information is because she wants future contact with you. A woman would not ask you to 'hang out' if she wasn't attracted to you in some way. I would be remiss in pointing this out, but it always surprises me how many people miss this.
The Enigma of Women: No Two are Alike
The tips presented here are worthless. That's right, the advice here is just about as worthless as a plot in a porno. Sure, there may be some truth in the statements above, but relying on those things alone is no guarantee that she's attracted to you. Instead of asking, "Does she like me?", start focusing on having fun and let the rest fall where it will.
All women are different. Each individual has different ways of showing that they are interested. There is no magical formula that will ever tell you for certain if a woman is interested in you or not. If anyone ever tells you any different, they're lying. As with most things in life, you simply have to rely on your gut instinct. If you think she's interested then ask her out.
Occasionally, you will get rejected. This is normal, and, in fact, expected. At the same time, remember that if she turns you down then you two would have never made a good match anyway. Move on, and keep dating until you find the woman who completes you.
As always, I wish you the best.
Questions & Answers
This girl has a boyfriend. However, we have been hanging out for awhile, and one night my father caught us holding hands. After that, she is mad at me, and she said she would never hold your hand again. What should I do?
Ignore the remark. Chicks will get upset, they will get embarrassed, but usually, they'll get over it pretty quick. If she already has a boyfriend and you're interested in her, either ask her out or find a different chick.Helpful 11
She keeps telling me she's single. Is that a hint that she likes me?
Depends on how she's telling you, but most likely, yes. Girls will leave clues and hints like that to push you into doing something to win their attention, and more. Take her out on a date and see what happens.Helpful 7
I have a question so there this girl I like, and she keeps on flirting with me every time I see her she’s always teasing me she’s hitting me and stuff, and if I arrive somewhere when she’s already there she will come racing over. Then when I ask her to hang out or something 9x out of 10, she will shoot me down. What does that mean?
This one should be obvious; look at the signs she's sending you.
1.) She keeps on flirting with you.
2.) She teases you.
3.) She gets excited when she sees you.
Those are pretty strong clues that she likes you.
So why does she shut you down when you ask to hang out?
There could be a number of reasons.. her parents don't want her going out. She could actually just be busy. She could have a fear of hanging out. I hung out once and almost got arrested, but that's a different story.
Most likely, she wants a bit more challenge. I've been through this before a few times.
First, try this: don't ask, don't leave a way out. "Hey, there's a band playing this Friday at the club I want you to see. I'll pick you up around 6." Not all chicks go for that, but many do, especially if they are already interested. Make it fun though. Find what she enjoys doing and then take her to do that.
Next, just ask her. A simple "why not" can do wonders.
Finally, stop asking. There are a lot of amazing chicks out there. If she doesn't want to hang, that's her loss.Helpful 3
I just recently hooked up with my ex-girlfriend, and when I walked her home, she invited me into her apartment. Do you think she is going to give me another chance?
One thing, man: there's a reason she's your ex. History has a way of repeating itself. If you're looking for a couple of quickies, sure, but if you're looking for something more, be careful and take it slow. There may be that chance, but then again, it could be asking for another breakup. The only way to know for sure is to go to her apartment and see what happens.Helpful 5
I asked a girl to hang out with me twice. At first she said yes, and then the second time she also said yes. Is that good? Does she like me?
If she's hanging out with you, and you like her, then yeah, that's probably a good thing.Helpful 4
© 2010 Eric Standridge