Darrell is interested in social psychology and the humanities.
To some, attraction is mysterious—it's more like an art. To others, it is a science—a complex mix of biochemistry and psychology. Taking individual differences into account, there is no law of attraction for men to follow. However, if you want to make yourself more attractive to women, there are certain attraction-killing behaviors that you should definitely avoid.
6 Things That Kill Attraction for a Woman
- Depending on the Woman to Lead All the Time
- Putting a Woman on a Pedestal
- Being Rude/Disrespectful to Women
- Being Too Available
- Being Possessive or Jealous
- Trying to Impress
1. Depending on the Woman to Lead All the Time
Yes, we are living in the modern era, but women do not want a dedicated follower. Taking the lead does not mean being pushy, arrogant, or self-important. Instead, it suggests that you exercise your personal authority and influence. For example, instead of asking a woman what she wants to do on a date, have a few suggestions at hand (note—these are suggestions). Women enjoy knowing what or how you’re thinking; denying them that opportunity is a sure turnoff.
2. Putting a Woman on a Pedestal
Women appreciate being treated like a princess, but putting them on a pedestal when you’re interacting with them makes them feel uncomfortable. Particularly if a woman senses that it is only because of her outward appearance, she is likely to be switched off. A woman wants to be treated as a human being above all, so avoid overdoing compliments, gushing like a schoolboy, and treating her like a delicate goddess. That’s a step towards creating a deeper personal connection, which builds on initial attraction.
3. Being Rude/Disrespectful to Women
Some clever guys out there hear that women don’t go for the nice guys. So, they try to be rude or disrespectful instead. Sure, that might work on one, two, or a few women, but it usually wouldn’t. Women just do not want a guy who is limp and spineless. However, that does not mean exhibiting primitive social behaviors towards them.
4. Being Too Available
Being too available suggests that your life is not very interesting and that it is going to revolve around the woman. In other words, it suggests a desperate, clingy, or needy man. Is that even remotely attractive? I don’t think so. Don’t agree to tentative arrangements—your time should be more valuable than that.
You should not have to pretend that you’re busy when you’re not either—that’s lame. Getting involved in other things besides work is a sure way to make your life more engaging to you and your potential partners.
5. Being Possessive or Jealous
A little jealousy might seem cute, but that can easily go wrong. The threshold for tolerance of possessive behavior or jealousy is really small. It signals insecurity and can be downright scary. It’s natural to be a bit jealous from time to time, but avoid letting that spill over into unattractive, stifling behavior.
6. Trying to Impress
If you really want to impress a woman, the best thing to do is avoid trying to impress. Trying to impress usually requires some insincerity or even distortions of the truth anyway. A man trying to impress comes across as a seller of rotten eggs trying to convince buyers that his stuff is guaranteed fresh.
It’s not just about being who you are, but also about being confident about who you are. Just be cool and don’t be discouraged if it does not always work. By being confident about who you are, you’ve already set yourself apart from other guys.
Attraction-killing behaviors are the polar opposite of attraction-creating behaviors. Before you can focus on good habits that make you more attractive, it is more important to eliminate the bad ones, which have the opposite effect.