Fresh perspective on dating issues compiled in consultation with friends in North America, Australia and African nations.
How to Tell If a Guy Doesn't Like You
Guys often give very specific signs that they aren't interested. Men aren't always the best verbal communicators, but you'll be much better off if you can pick up on some of the other signs that they are sharing.
There are many signs of attraction that men and women show when they have an interest in one another. By looking and thoroughly observing the body language and the general behavior of the person, you can conclude whether or not he or she has an interest in you.
In this article, I will describe in detail the many signs that guys show when they don’t like a girl. You might be interested in this guy, but how sure are you that he has the same feelings for you? This seems like a hard question to answer for many women, and it doesn't need to be. You can observe the behavior of the guy you like and determine for yourself if he has feelings for you.
Signs That He's Not Interested
- He keeps his distance, which means he wants to make sure you aren't close to one another.
- He will avoid making physical contact with you (i.e., no touching or hugging).
- He prefers to associate and spend more time with other girls.
- He seems uninterested in things you do.
- His eye contact with you doesn’t last long. He will stare at you for a moment and blink his eye away.
- He doesn't smile or laugh when you're together, and he doesn’t laugh at your jokes.
- He asks you for advice about his relationships with other girls.
Signs Your Crush Doesn’t Like You
- He tends to do the exact opposite of what you're doing.
- His conversation with you is strictly “professional” and revolves around normal things, rather than flirting or teasing.
- You are always the conversation starter and not the other way round.
- He doesn't congratulate you when you do something extraordinary or special. He just says “Good for you” or responds without enthusiasm.
- He doesn’t seem to notice when you put on makeup, fragrance, or sexy clothes.
- He doesn’t get jealous when you are with other guys. If he liked you, it wouldn’t have been easy for him to tolerate seeing you with other men.
- He never gives you gifts.
- He will avoid you and the places you go.
- He doesn’t call you unless he has a business or work-related thing to discuss with you.
Signs That Your He Doesn't Like You
- Would he get upset when someone harasses you in front of him? If not, that is an indication that he may not care about you.
- If he avoids being near you at social functions, he may not want to be seen with you.
- You borrow something from him, and he demands you return it immediately.
- He doesn't seem to feel your absence.
- He doesn't comfort you when you are having difficulties.
- Even things that aren't that important to him seem to matter more than you, and he'd rather pay attention to those things than spend time with you.
- He doesn't care about your whereabouts or whether or not you're safe.
- He doesn't try to impress you.
- His body language will clearly tell you if he likes you or not. Read this article on body language signs men show when they are interested in a woman.
- He doesn’t ask you about your social life. In other words, he doesn't seem interested in your friends, your family, your interests and likes, etc.
- He will only offer you help when absolutely necessary. If he liked you, he would offer you unlimited and sometimes unnecessary help.
- He doesn't offer any financial help, even when you are struggling to make ends meet and he is better off financially.
- When you ask him to do something for you, he doesn’t sacrifice his commitments to help you.
- He doesn't attend your graduation or birthday party even when you invite him. He will give you excuses as to why he can’t show up.
- He talks to you like his sister or mother. His conversation will dwell on normal things, not love or romance.
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Questions & Answers
Question: If a guy doesn’t text a lot, does that mean that he doesn't like me?
Answer: Some guys just don’t like texting and prefer face to face conversations instead. But if he’s not communicating with you much at all, I’m guessing he’s not really interested.
The good news is that there will be some other guy in your future who will love to talk and text with you. You just have to wait until you find him.
Question: What if the guy likes touching my hand and laughs at my jokes, but seems to like another girl? Does he like us both or just her?
Answer: I think he probably likes the two of you, and that's okay. He's still getting to know you both. It makes sense to spend time with a bunch of different people before deciding who suits you best as a possible partner. Don't be jealous. Jealousy is not a good look.
I encourage you to talk and laugh with more than just one boy. All people change as they grow older. It is good to make friends with lots of people when you're young, so you'll be comfortable talking with them when you are older. Don't obsess about one guy just yet. And try not to fall into the mistake of viewing this boy's attention as some kind of a 'competition' between you and the other girl.
Question: What should I do if the guy I've been with for five years thinks his friend's death is more important than our anniversary? He no longer helps me financially even though he sees me struggling. Do you think he is spending time with someone else now that he's behaving differently?
Answer: I don't care how many years a couple has been together. If a friend dies around the time of an anniversary, I'd consider the friend's death to be more important. But if you're having ongoing problems, you should talk with him about why it doesn't feel like you're in a good place.
A person doesn't have to be seeing someone else for a relationship to become stale. Sometimes we just grow apart or lose the passion and interest for no apparent reason. But that's reason enough to reassess and consider moving on. If the guy can't meet your emotional needs, perhaps he's not the right guy for you.
Question: I am a lady and I like a certain guy who is three years younger than me. Is it right that we can flirt and even date if destiny allows?
Answer: It sounds like you are both adults. By the time a couple is in their 20's, three years age difference isn't anything to worry about. As they get even older, it becomes even less of an issue. The only time when three years is a big deal is when one or both of them are teenagers.
If you're both adults, I encourage you to flirt and date the guy. Your age is just a number. The big question is whether or not you are compatible.
Question: If you tell the guy you like that you like them and they just hold up the "OK" sign, what does that mean?
Answer: Hard to know exactly which of these things the guy meant by the 'OK' gesture:
1) It could be he's happy with the news (especially if he was smiling) so he's encouraging you.
2) It might have just been the acknowledgment that he heard you. It doesn't mean he necessarily likes you, but he's heard you, so there's no need to tell him again.
3) The other option would be that he didn't know quite what to say or do so he just gave a quick, nervous response before running away to stew over what he could have or should have said.
I think your next step from here should be to say hello whenever you see him and make conversation when you get the chance. A relationship won't develop unless one of you breaks the ice.
Question: How do I tell him that I like him ?
Answer: If you really want to tell him you like him, just say something like 'I like you, you're funny' or 'I like you, you seem nice.' But if you don't know him well enough to say that kind of thing to him yet, I suggest you start by saying 'hi' or 'good morning' as you pass him. It seems really awkward to be blurting out 'I like you' to someone you don't know at all, so start by being more subtle with a simple greeting and see what happens from there.
Question: How would you know if a boy likes you even if he hasn't told you he does?
Answer: I have a list of 50 hints than might help you ... https://pairedlife.com/dating/How-Do-You-Know-A-Gu...
Question: When playing a game and your crush puts his foot on yours, what does that mean?
Answer: I can think of a few things it might mean:
- He's clumsy.
- He's very competitive and trying to win the game.
- He's trying to get your attention.
If he put his foot on yours gently, and not in a way trying to slow you down or trip you up, I'm guessing he's trying to get your attention. Start up a conversation with him and see if he gets involved in talking with you. Or you could wait and see how he behaves in future games. He might be looking for excuses to get close to you. Of course, he's going to have to start talking with you though if there's to be any real chance of getting to know each other better.
Question: Does a man usually talk about his future plans, e.g., kids and family, with his girlfriend?
Answer: A man who dreams of sharing those plans with his girlfriend probably does. If he's interested in getting married and having kids with her, it makes sense for him to see what she thinks about the same things. If she never wants kids, he probably wants to be aware sooner rather than later.
Some men, however, might talk about important issues like these in the same way that he talks about wanting to own a Ferrari or be a millionaire by the time he's 40. Telling his girlfriend about his big package of dreams for the future might be no different from sharing his dreams with everyone else he knows. It all depends on the guy.
© 2012 Daniel Long