100 Excuses Women Use to Reject Men

I gave up on asking women out years ago. Never got a positive response so why continue? I wouldn’t mind the excuses, they are used to protect peoples feelings.

I think the worst was when they laugh like I'm some joke. I had good friend of mine do that, we had been friends for years and I finally got the courage to ask her out and she laughed at me. I never spoke to her again and it was years before I asked another women out, fortunately she was nicer and just said she wasn't interested.

My ex asked me out, unfortunately she left me and I never dated again. (17 years ago)

Who cares about differences, both men and women over look the good people and often choose the abusive jerk or an overbearing woman who wants it all her way and it never works out cause they dont come together as a team.

"I go through the list"

9% of people have no game

Chriswillman90:

There is no way I can tell you everything I know about honesty, relationships, closure and such, no matter how much I wanted to share it. It's such a long story.

There are a few books that you might be willing to check out - they are not about relationships per se, but they are very useful in terms of personal growth and understanding human/social behaviour. Those are not self-help books, however.

There are other ways to achieve closure which do not involve the other person and their input and, especially, their truth.

But one important thing I wanted to mention - after I wrote my articles I used to get a lot of feedback and those conversations were the moment when I started thinking about the topic more than before I wrote. It was a thought-starting point and that is a power of writing.

If this article is only a beginning in your exploration of the topic, then you've done a good job. So, congratulations.

I agree honesty with diplomacy is best. Having "class" is commendable.

The goal should never be to shatter someone by saying something along the lines of "Never in a million years would I be desperate enough to go out with you!" And yet that may be exactly what one is thinking! :)

When someone says; "It's not you, it's me" as empty as that sounds it's the truth. They are (the one ) who is unhappy or "not feeling it". They may know it's not anything you've done or said so there is no reason to "make up something" unless you pressured them to.

Most people who believe in "closure" are looking to either "fix" things about themselves based on the opinion of their "ex" or they want to "learn" what they can do to avoid the same results in the future. Everyone is different!

As I sated in my closure article it really does no good!

The very reason why your ex dumped you could be the same reason why the next person falls madly in love with you!

If we decided to change with every feedback our "exes" gave us we'd be flapping in all sorts of directions. At some point you have to just be you!

Know yourself, Love yourself, Trust yourself!

The goal is to find someone who will love and appreciate you for you.

Below is my article. Thanks for writing on such an interesting topic! https://hubpages.com/relationships/breakupsandclos...

It was a rhetorical question.

Too often people pursue relationships based upon what they've read or been told what they "should be looking for" as oppose to what actually feels right for themselves.

My "closure is overrated" article is designed to help people move on with their lives. I once had a conversation with a 30+ year old woman who told me she had her heart broken at age 15 by a guy who moved away.

One day they came across one another and she said they had a long talk.

Afterwards she felt she free to move on and love again.

In my opinion that's giving an ex too much power over one's life!

Essentially due to her need for closure she blew through the rest of her teens and all of her 20s to get an "explanation" that may not have come!

She can't get those years back! (such a waste)

They were both only 15 years old when they broke up!

Dashing Scorpio, I agree. When I thought of "Toosie" more - the whole movie is about Dustin Hoffman lying to everyone starting from his agent and ending with his girlfriend. Funny thing he didn't intend his lying to hurt anyone.

I had my fair share of thinking that if someone rejects me then a truthful explanation is better than "a well-intended" lie.

Maybe in some cases, but certainly not in all. The last boyfriend told me that I was intimidating and had a subtlety of a bulldozer, but, of course, his feeling for me did not change, but he wanted to go back to friends because he couldn't serve his God... blah, blah, blah...

I even read your article about "closure is overrated" and disagreed. But in that last case I tried to make peace and ended up being hurt more and then I thought - as much as I needed closure, in that case I just cut the cord.

But it gave me an insight for the future - stop and examine how exactly I end up with guys like...

So, yes, I agree. It's not him, it's me.

All those "excuses" are legitimate - true or not.

Yes, religion is a deal-breaker, especially in his case.

Do I have to go through all the reasons or one is enough? It's over.

The end.

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I wasn't quite sure about your last sentence -

are you asking me personally which dream I'm pursuing or

was it a general statement about what other people pursue?

every person has different waya of handling rejection...I guess my past experience didn't come to the point that my words sounded so offending to someone..that person was just too graceful to accept it

kallini2010, I remember that "Tootsie" scene. It's a classic!

Women oftentimes have stated what they "want" in a man and if such a guy shows up they put him in "The Friend Zone".

At some point a person has to recognize it's not a "coincidence" that all of their exes are "jerks". Very few admit they're into "bad boys", "arrogant guys" or "players". They just (happen) to "attract" those guys for relationships.

If anyone is having one nightmare date/relationship experience after another it's probably time they re-examine their "mate selection criteria"

Each of us (chooses) our own friends, lovers, and spouse!

Maybe they've been saying "no" to the wrong people or for the wrong reasons. Are you pursuing your dream or society's dream? :)

Well, since you invite honesty, I would like to draw your attention to the fact that the word "misogynistic" cannot be applies to excuses themselves. If you replace the word "misogynistic" with "women-hating...", you would see that it doesn't make any sense.

But the reason I am saying this is not to point "one big flaw" in your hub, quite the contrary. Even though that this word is clearly out of place, the overall message is clear. The tone of the article is not "women-hating" and there are no mixed messages.

I'd say most men and women get the meaning behind "I'm not going to/cannot date you because..."

I've been told once and I agree with it whole-heatedly that in communication the most important thing is not the impeccable word usage and grammar (mine never was), but getting the message across.

Those excuses do just that. When someone becomes honest, he invites all sorts of trouble as "punishment" for his social ineptitude.

I don't know if you ever saw the movie "Tootsie", it's fairly old, but there is one moment there when Jessica Lange in the same vein said that all he wanted that men were straightforward and said what they mean.

Surely enough, Dustin Hoffman approached her at a party and did precisely that - told her what he wanted. What do you think happened?

And when it comes to being lame, my favourite is what men say as "compliments". "You are so beautiful!" What? That's it? Maybe, that's it if it is enough.

Women don't bother with coming up with better "excuses" and men don't bother with coming up with better "compliments" (rather pick-up lines).

In my opinion, there only reason for that is that it works. The moment it won't people will invent better things to say.

Best regards from the person who knows the price for honesty. I blame it on my parents. It became a trait that is really hard to get rid of.

I wonder what did you mean by

"Are some of these excuses going too far and are potentially misogynistic?"

Could have used this hub fifteen or twenty years ago, a really interesting entertaining read, great hub, thanks for sharing, voted up, Lee