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Why the ENFP and INFJ are Perfect for Each Other

The ENFP and INFJ will instantly have a connection. This connection should be something that will last for a long time whether years of friendship, business partnership, or love. There may be some reasons that the two will have a falling out, but to be honest -- the two intrinsically understand each other and balance each other out. For every Myers Briggs personality, there's a counterpart that makes an almost perfect fit. The key is in the functions. Relationships struggle if people don't have similar functions, or dominate functions that guide them. ENFP and INFJ being both highly intuitive people would struggle with someone who is more dominated by sensing. These two thrive on metaphors, abstractions, and the creative -- trying to get them to be normal and grounded is like trying to make a levitating unicorn made of rainbows do your taxes.


Attraction to Each Other

Both the INFJ and ENFP will feel instant attraction to each other. They both have pieces the other one desires. The INFJ wants to be understood and needs help coming out of their shell because they are the most rare personality making them feel constantly like their ideas and feelings don't fit in with the rest of the way the group feels. The INFJ also struggles with being quiet because their dominate function is introverted intuition -- their first objective is to take information introspectively. Until this hits their emotional center and their can translate the information out-loud empathetically, they tend to keep information to themselves. ENFP are primarily information gatherers, but through extroverted intuition. To the INFJ, the ENFP talks in the way the INFJ is taking in information. This is all very pleasing and creates an ESP effect.

The ENFP on the other hand feels a strong Fi-Si loop that they can stuck in. The ENFP is the champion and is wanting constantly to involve people, spread ideas, and get things in motion. But there's this other more introspective side they have that they don't always know how to convey, if they should convey it. The INFJ in being more introspective knows how to help the ENFP with their emotional growth. The INFJ knows how to encourage them and let them know it's okay to have dark thoughts, to be a little serious, to have the crazy kind of depth. Both are obsessed with people and gathering information about people because their in the NF temperament.

The INFJ may be surprised at just how much the ENFP actually craves time by themselves and melting with more independent creative ideas. The ENFP will also be surprised by the army of friends that the seemingly shy INFJ accumulates. They're both well liked people and sometimes struggle with people pleasing. Their family centered and will put a lot of energy toward building and raising a family well. When they're both certain they want to stay with each other, they'll put less energy toward friends. They get emotionally motivated toward each other.

If both are mature in their functions, they'll be an incredible support system for each other. They may both struggle with their "S" which is down in the gutter. For the INFJ, getting they need to express who they are in the physical realm in order to grow their "S" instead of only relying on intuition. If you only rely on intuition, it will be like having a super powerful right arm with a gimp, in need of being amputated left arm. How you can get in tune with your "S" is by cooking, dancing, doing chores, pottery, hiking... something that gets your body to move. Slow your mind down and be more conscious of what you're doing in grounded reality. You might not like it at first, but if you balance this out, you'll also have stronger intuition.

As for the ENFP, you have Si at the bottom, which is introverted sensing. One of the best personalities you can learn from on Si is the ISFJ who is dominated by introverted sensing and is similar enough to the INFJ that it won't make you bonkers. Si is one of the most difficult functions to understand and grow. It's not something the western world promotes, but the eastern world gets it. Si has to do with understanding the physical processes within. You can do this through meditation, chakra balancing, praying, etc. Try spending time by yourself for 30 minutes and going through each part of your body and asking how it feels. Do this until the storm of intuition in your mind stops talking (both through your mouth and brain). If an ENFP refuses to take care of their Fi and Si for more jolly of things, those qualities will stab him in the back.

Remember, There's More to Life Than Myers Briggs

Though you may have initial attraction and great chemistry, remember there's other factors at play. You need to consider if you're trying to be romantic what kind of background the other person has. You two may click to the moon and back, but it may be impossible to close the gap if there's two much difference of where your lives came from, where they are now, and where they're going. You need to consider each others religious views, life goals, and baggage. Likely you will have a great deal in common just by being in the NF family. ENFP and INFJ are both religious and spiritual people, which is another reason they draw to each other. The INFJ is lying to themselves if they say they're conservative only when it comes to religion -- they love learning about what's in this world, questioning what's out there and how they can apply it their value system, and testing the waters to see what spiritually is real. You know you're an INFJ 100% if you feel like a psychic to some degree -- which is another reason you probably don't feel like you fit in that much with society. If you're not getting that kind of strange intuition, you're probably an INTJ... they're more reasonable.

The ENFP sees the universe from the farthest points and slowly works their way to a more tiny space. With extroverted intuition guiding them, they can see how things fit in at an advanced level globally. You may drive an ENFP crazy with too many details and structure when what they really crave is the openness of ideas and reality -- this is why they delight in seeing others happy and why they love to pull an INFJ out of his shell. The ENFP then goes all the way to the bottom with introverted sensing where they must ask questions of their body, how it feels, why it feels the way it does. The more an ENFP can force themselves to better understand this -- the more they'll grow and appreciate everything. Both of these personalities have incredibly strange social skills because the INFJ is the most social introvert and the ENFP is hyper social, but also hyper in need of chill, quiet space.

The ENFP and INFJ both have tendencies to be hippies. They want to play and create in the world, not be tied down to paying bills. These personalities need careers that make their passions shine, not necessarily their bank accounts. If they have the immediate things taken care of in their physical surroundings, they're happy campers. They need their fill when it comes to imagination and fantasy. I suggest that they live in a space that doesn't require a lot of belongings because less is more for them -- and we'll keep them from going bankrupt.

Billy Crystal and Robin Williams -- the INFJ and ENFP connection

How to Tell it's an INFJ and ENFP Connection

1. Everything else and everyone else in the room will not be in focus at all. They'll be so focused on their inner world and the inner world exchange that they experience that everything else gets tuned out. They're in their own little world -- and it's completely harmless.

2. Hyperactive spontaneity. If you're an INFJ and you think you're not spontaneous, something isn't right. You might not be an INFJ, because the INFJ loves the random -- it gives their introverted intuition a major jolt. The ENFP and INFJ will get their selves into serious randomness with little to no planning.

3. This combination turns into a powerful duo of jokes. The ENFP starts the joke off and the INFJ comes in with the punchline -- and they keep going with that energy.

4. They'll stare at each other from a far. They like the connection, so they'll keep checking on them from afar when they can't be right next to each other. INFJ has a powerful set of eyes, and they know it, so they're careful with those eyes. An INFJ has Cyclops eyes and Jean Grey's mind.

5. If you're witnessing an ENFP and INFJ connection you'll probably be wondering why the heck the two are not together yet.

6. People will notice the connection and ask about it.

7. The two will plan to only spend a little bit of time with each other and then be together for an entire night... which is what they really wanted anyway.

8. The ENFP will keep picking the INFJ and the INFJ will make obstacles to see if the ENFP is set on them. An INFJ will literally find another prospective lover and say, "Don't you want to talk to them?" And the ENFP will either say "no" or push that person away. The ENFP knows how to decide on a person, and the INFJ has to check to make sure there's loyalty.

9. The ENFP will get louder and louder and louder. The INFJ will get wittier and wittier and wittier.

10. Deep, sensual hugs. They can communicate without words and just convey it all in a hug.

11. They will serve others. They want to make sure those around them are okay. They make a perfect counseling team.

12. Don't confuse the ENFP for only wanting to be around the herd. He wants the INFJ all to himself. It will be a noticeable goal.

13. The INFJ may be slow to the ENFP's advances. Have patience... they're likely to come around.

14. The two are both idiosyncratic, having created their own personal world their entires lives. When they come across each other, they're surprised the world they've created fits someone else.

15. These are two of the most intelligent personalities. They occasionally try to hide their brains so they can fit into a group situation. Don't be surprised if they jump in conversation from philosophy, religion, math, to cartoons, UFOS, and unicorns.

16. They're both dominated by information gathering -- they express affection by large info dumps and seeing how all those dots can connect.

17. Creative expressions -- late night jams, dancing, pottery making, poetry reading, cooking, and painting.

18. You'll see the INFJ be more comfortable than you've ever seen and more out of their shell. You'll see the ENFP more balanced... and also insane.

19. They hate conflict, but they know how to resolve it with kindness over arrogance.

20. They seem like two giant big kids, somehow still innocent... and also with the dirtiest minds you've ever seen.

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45 comments

Anonym 11 months ago

I think what you call the INFJ's spontanity isn't exactlay that.

I am an INFJ, and, even though it may look like, what I do isn't being spontanous. It's creating connections/relations on so many levels in a split second that it may look spontanous and random. But there is a connection. :)


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SerenityHalo 11 months ago from Chicago Author

@Anonym

What you are describing is spontaneous.

Here is the definition:

adjective: spontaneous

performed or occurring as a result of a sudden inner impulse or inclination and without premeditation or external stimulus.

The INFJ is guided more by that than sensory information. Spontaneity doesn't mean there isn't a purpose or connection, it's when it seems to appear without preliminary causation. This is not how dominate sensors think at all.


schticklet 7 months ago

I'm an INFJ, and this article describes in great detail my ideal relationship.

I'm hopeful I can find a person like the one described here, friend or beau.


schticklet 7 months ago

I just remembered my best friend or 13 years is an ENFP. Wow, I feel like it was destiny that brought us together.


Paul 7 months ago

Can an ENFP help clear this up for me. I'm an INFJ and have known this ENFJ woman for a long time and have been great friends. It's like I have the the INFJ me and a trapped person on the inside. It's only around her that this inner me is able to be released. Any ways, we don't live near each other but I recently went to see her on her birthday. We planned on only being out for 3 hours in the evening that turned into 5 before everything was closed down and I decided we should call it an evening. Well, my gut feeling said she was attracted to me and I logically saw all the signs she was but with her being an ENFP and being a happy go lucky people pleaser I am not sure if what I felt and saw is what she was feeling. So I decided to let her know up front I was attracted to her and her reply was she was going through a divorce and wasn't ready for any new relationship which makes perfect sense but I'm still lost to as if the attraction was truly there on her part or if it was just me seeing what I wanted to see.


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SerenityHalo 7 months ago from Chicago Author

@Paul

Likely there was a connection. The other person might be unsure of what they want at this time since they are coming out of a relationship. Good news is that they are still figuring things out in regards to you and don't want to give you a hard "no" at this point, so just keep things positive and friendly.


grace 7 months ago

I am enfp woman! If it was me I would probably just be trying to not hurt your feelings. Trust her when she says she isn't ready because if you push harder it'll make her want you less! Just stay positive and nice and eventually she may be ready but it will be on her terms. @Paul


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SerenityHalo 7 months ago from Chicago Author

@Grace

I agree with this.


Paul 7 months ago

I've been very respectful of what she has said and believe what she said but it was very confusing to me to get the "I'm interested" signals only to get a verbal I'm not ready. Heck she even stole a kiss from me right as we parted ways. So my plan was just to be light, positive and friendly and carry on with my life like normal. I was just curious if there was a connection or I was just seeing what I wanted to see. @Grace


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SerenityHalo 7 months ago from Chicago Author

@paul

I still think there's a spark to a degree. She's not ready for something serious yet.


grace 7 months ago

I'm sure she is interested, and You probably do have a connection, but she is most likely not ready to do anything about that connection and just wants to keep it fun and simple.Even though she is interested, it could just be as a distraction from the sadness she feels over her divorce. She still probably is not ready for a steady relationship, but likes being able to have a little fun(like giving you a kiss) but it is just lighthearted. I wouldn't expect anything too serious @Paul


Meg 6 months ago

I was probably the luckiest person alive cause my boyfriend is ENFP and I am INFJ. And yes, we are soulmates


Audrey 6 months ago

I'm an enfp and my best friend of many years is an infj. This is great!! It's also very accurate for the platonic relationships. We are actually so close that our mothers have adopted us as sisters and let us live at each other's houses for extended periods of time. We actually call each other's mothers mom because it's easier and more natural than formal greetings. My infj even graciously refrained from killing me where I stood when I moved into her house during a fight with my family without telling her. She is without a doubt my platonic soul mate


Geb 6 months ago

Great thank youn so much what you wrote is just so perfect. I can imagine having a relationship like that friendship or more i just adore the idea of having this soul connection with someone like infj enfp relationship


riddlemethis33 6 months ago

The INFJ description is exactly correct!! One thing. INFJ's need to watch out for this. Idealizing. No two personality types are perfect for each other. No one is perfect.

INFJ's have a strong (Ni)Fe combination, I think it's one reason why our personality type feels misunderstood. We get into peoples heads and emotions/motivations very easily. I've been called a psychic (we aren't).

I have met an ENFP also a J who is equal on the intuition level. It isn't a perfect friendship- but they get me more then any other type. The next MBTI who get an INFJ is INFP AND INTJ. I think the most important part of the ENFP and INFJ relationship is if they are mature in minor functions.


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SerenityHalo 6 months ago from Chicago Author

@riddlemethis33

I agree with this. And oh how nice it would be to be psychic.


Amanda Hill 6 months ago

This is so accurate, it's comforting. I'm an INFJ being pursued by a ENFP


Momo 6 months ago

I'm the most happy and lucky girl in the world, because I'm ENFP and my fiance is INFJ....And, yes, we are best friend, and lovers, and everything, it's like magic.

Nobody in the world can understand me like my INFJ, and he always says the same about me. We are...like sun and mon, or like the ying and yang. I really love him, he's the most beautifull person in the world...

I want to stay with my INFJ forever.

And...you, INFJ...you are amazing people!!!


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SerenityHalo 6 months ago from Chicago Author

@Amanda Hill

I'm glad it is comforting!


Wayne 5 months ago

I'm an ENFP and I met an INFJ girl about a month ago.

We connected the moment we first talked , and everything has been so magical! We just happen to stumble upon this article around the same time. and we both found it incredibly accurate. This has been the best 1st month EVER!


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SerenityHalo 5 months ago from Chicago Author

@Wayne

Congrats! The magic is real and you know it. :)


anonomous 4 months ago

I'm an INFJ female and I've been friends with this guy for almost a year now, and we instantly clicked. I am fairly certain he is an ENFP from what I have read about each of the personality types. I really like him, but I feel trapped because I am not one to be confident and initiate too much. Whenever we talk, however, it's so natural and easy. We have a lot in common and share the same sense of humor.

I just don't know if he is just being nice to me like he does so many people, or if he likes me back. He is so friendly that whenever we see each other, so many people go up to talk to him, and he doesn't walk up to me to start a conversation with me. But when I go up to him, I feel like we could talk forever.

I read on this website that when an ENFP is interested, he will make intense eye contact and smile a lot, which he does. A lot. And I've caught him glancing at me a few times. And he has opened up to me about some things in his past, but I don't want to get that confused with the INFJ just being an approachable person.

I tend to overthink things, so I just don't know if he could possibly feel the same way back or if I'm just crazy and reading too much into it. This website has been really accurate with my personality type, so I'm hoping for some good advise as to whether or not he could like me back...


Anastassja Tania 4 months ago

i am an INFJ and feels like 100% home when reading this!!


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SerenityHalo 4 months ago from Chicago Author

@Anastassja Tania

I am so glad this made you feel at home! That makes writing these hubs worth it.


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SerenityHalo 4 months ago from Chicago Author

@anonomous

All of this really makes sense and are reasonable concerns. ENFP and INFJ do instantly click, but I find it's hard to know what is going on because it is so different. ENFP is more likely to take charge, and an INFJ does struggle to take charge -- and that's okay. It is one of the more introspective personalities, so it can freeze up if taking charge which is super uncomfortable. I say keep interacting with the supposed ENFP and see what happens, but don't hold your hopes up to high too soon. If you can spend time one on one, that would help. Even if it's just something really light hearted.


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SerenityHalo 4 months ago from Chicago Author

Glad to know you have found someone that makes you happy! ENFP + INFJ is one of the best combinations out there. Period.


May 4 months ago

Wow! I'm an ENFP and met an INFJ. This is crazy accurate! It took him 2 months to ask me out but we've been together for more than a year now. More stuff make sense now too! The whole numbered list was so accurate. Great article!


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SerenityHalo 4 months ago from Chicago Author

@May

Glad to be of help!


Sady93 3 months ago

I met my husband almost 25 years ago and we've been married for 23 of them. Certain things he does drives me nuts so I have been looking around for ways to motive or accept the differences we have. He's a great person and I would absolutely call him my best friend. We connected instantaneously when we met.

I recently did the Meyers Briggs and found out I was an INFJ which describes me extremely accurately. I bugged him for weeks to do Meyers Briggs and he finally did - to find out he was an ENFP. While we have had our struggles over the years, all the descriptions of compatibility listed here represent us and our relationship. Our kids will be grown and out of the nest in the next 5 years and we are looking forward to sharing adventures (which I plan and he enhances) because when we are together, we are like a couple of kids playing on the playground.

I really appreciated seeing this and reminding myself that while we are different, we have a connection I share with very few people.


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SerenityHalo 3 months ago from Chicago Author

@Sady93

Glad this helped! Hopefully it gives you some insight on the relationship and what can make it even greater.


anomous 3 months ago

Thank you for your feedback SerenityHalo! All is helpful at this point :]


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SerenityHalo 3 months ago from Chicago Author

@anonmous

Good luck to you! Life is a beautiful journey.


Anonymous 3 months ago

I read this and immediately thought of someone who I knew I had a connection with, he obviously knew before I did that there was a connection like this, I'm an INFJ and I'm pretty sure he's an ENFP... It took me a really long time to understand what was going on between us but once I did it was like this... but question... He was into all sports, like REALLY into them... and do ENFPs move on easily from someone they connect with? I now know how much I miss the connection and I didn't realize until it was almost over how great it was... At first I don't know why I didn't see it, but it was more that apparent that he saw it... Would the INFJ feel the ENFP staring? I know I did MULTIPLE times... I have so many questions I would love for any answers... Honestly I just want this relationship back tbh...


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SerenityHalo 2 months ago from Chicago Author

Most people are oblivious to the INFJ and how it uses its eyes. I think the INFJ type have it down to look at something without getting caught, so they know when someone else has been caught. ENFP are magical, and the good news is there are more of them than there are of you. You have better odds to find another ENFP. Also, you can still have a decent connection even if you are not dating. Enjoy it for what it is! ENFP do tend to move on better than INFJ.


hikarinokishi 2 months ago

I didn't realize that most people didn't know about the- for lack of a better word- infamous eyes. I have many friends even though I am 81% introverted, and I am an INFJ. I really didn't expect to be an extrovert but at the same time I figured it would be close to the middle because I tend to put on a mask of extroverted-ness when I am in public. I do have a few questions, though.

Why is it that INFJs and ENFPs have such strong intuitions?

Why do we get along so well even though one of is is an extrovert and one of us is an introvert?

Are there other types that get along this well with the INFJ?

I also didn't quite understand what you meant by the ENFPs needing to have quiet. Did you mean that they needed the quiet of thinking in your brain instead of thinking out loud?

And also thank you very much for writing this post. It was a very eye-opening experience.


Phoebe 2 months ago

I have just read this personality thing since my daughter did it and it is so accurate. I'm an ENFP. My husband is completely opposite- this is no surprize to me as we have hit heads walls etc our entire marriage. I've become very submissive as its the only way to have peace and some joy. Lately though I'm like trying to fill myself with something, anything to feel alive. I have recently started a new job were I am completely happy. That's just the beginning. One of my work colleages hit me like a firework -as I heard his voice or heard footsteps before I knew it was him - my insides would just egnight to nearly explode. He was not my usual type on the outside and to be honest he didn't even look at me when I was first introduced. He trained me a fair bit for my new position. The first day I feel training i was hopping we'd get along ..but not expect how fast and ridiculously well we did get on. I was so open, more than usual., to him straight away, my dirty humour was out to play and he reciprocated straight away - we both love and appreciate music and even sang in front of each other - underneath this egnighting firework thing was going on for me . This quick deep connection has not happened to me since I was single about 30 years ago. I found him so attractive, physically but his beautiful soft nature just melted me away. I didn't want to admit it but I started to fall for him. I wanted to believe we could be the greatest of friends. The connection was so magnetic. He happened to ask me what personality I was and he told me his. I had not puto alot into it as just wasn't thinking like that at that time - but as weeks went on our almost spell like attraction just grew . So I read the ENFP and INFJ and it was wow to say the least. I can see how we are so connected and I do feel like writing just slot right in with each other. It makes sence..the strongest of connection that we have. He definatly doesn't give away as much as me but he has told me he thinks and feels the same. I have a partner though and I do have that strongly loyal streak. I'm not happy- and haven't been for a long time and neither has my husband. My work colleages is single. Such a beautiful man. Nothing has happened except words and 2 hugs which I was so content with. It's not a fair situation for him or my husband. I'm hoping somehow I can keep a great friendship with my work colleage and not real happy about staying with my husband. Ifor I could just pick up and go and follow my heart - I would go start a new life, date my work colleage and experience a whole new level of love and acceptance . I do think we would make a perfect pairing EFNP AND INFJ


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SerenityHalo 2 months ago from Chicago Author

@phoebe

Have you tried marital counseling with your husband or addressed the problems with him? Divorce isn't easy to process, and will be a lot more work than you are expecting. You may have a great connection with this person, but it won't be an easy road. There will be difficulty. Focus on what needs to happen in your marriage, why you married in the first place, and what you can do to reconcile it.


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SerenityHalo 2 months ago from Chicago Author

1. INFJ and ENFP are dominated by intuition. There are four functions each personality gets, and each get weighted a little more differently. This is what defines the personality, essentially. INFJ and ENFP are not the only personalities dominated by intuition -- so are INTJ and ENTP. INFJ and ENFP are the only intuitive based personalities guided by feeling. This can make them kind of weird and insightful about people and more abstract ideas. These two connect really well because of this dynamic.

2. Extroversion and introversion are not as important when it comes to chemistry as the functions themselves. If you put any people together with a similar dominate function, this will be helpful to chemistry -- and INFJ and ENFP are in that category. Also, they have the same temperament, they come from the NF family along with the ENFJ and INFP. The way they process information and the flow of it is quite natural to them and that can make for some automatic chemistry.

3. There are other types that get along this well with the INFJ. The next best would be ENTP which also is dominated by extroverted intuition, like the ENFP. INFJ also does well with those in the same temperament, INFP and ENFJ. There is a theory that an ISTJ could have a similar effect since it technically is an upside down ENFP -- it has all the same functions, but is backwards in its order.

4. ENFP will need time for introspection. It is a loud personality and loves all the action around it -- but it does need time to be by itself and think, mull over thoughts, and do what might look more like introverted habits. It especially needs time to think by itself to process its emotions.


HeroineOlympus 7 weeks ago

I´m myself an INFJ with an ENFP boyfriend and I´m really happy about all these informations. I just wanted to say thank you.


Ed 13 days ago

Im an INFJ gay male and my boyfriend is an ENFP and this is totally us to the T! This was such a pleasure to read and even made me laugh when I could think of specific events that correlated to some of the examples.


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SerenityHalo 12 days ago from Chicago Author

Ah, I'm so glad this resonated with you. Best of luck to you!


Francesca 16 hours ago

Thank you for the great post. Im an ENFP and my bf is INFJ. And the description fits us really well. He is an spontaneous INFJ and im an ENFP who do value my alone time.

True enough, we are on an LDR. I live in the Philippines and he lives in Paris. We both created our lives separately before we met. We have our own professions and different religions. Its true INFJ craves for information, though he may be conservative with religion - i dont think so too! Our future plans together, involves travelling and living away from our respective countries - I know we will make ends meet with God's support. :)


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SerenityHalo 14 hours ago from Chicago Author

Wow. You have an epic romance going on here. You guys are falling in love across borders, religions, I assume just about everything. I really hope it all works out for you.


CC 13 hours ago

Thanks for the post/article but can you pleeeeassseeee attend to the grammatical errors? This text is replete with errors and it detracts from the writer's credibility. Sorry, just want you to have a chance at gaining a wider following!


SkipINFJ 97 minutes ago

This isn't the first resource I've read stating that INFJs and ENFPs are "perfect for each other." I'm a definite INFJ, and in my personal history, there is no type that is more challenging for me to be around than an ENFP. It is so much work and so draining that I could not imagine dating an ENFP. Apparently, I'm the oddball here, but that unusual for me.

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    Andrea Lawrence (SerenityHalo)207 Followers
    172 Articles

    Andrea loves to write on the zodiac, myers briggs, and texting. She is an expert on romance and relationships. She also has two cats.



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