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Dating an Aquarius: What to Expect

Andrea writes on various topics from dating, couples, astrology, weddings, interior design, and gardens. She studied film and writing.

Aquarius can be hard to read. They're chill on the surface, intelligent, and otherworldly. It can feel like you're dating a fairy, angel, or mermaid.

Aquarius can be hard to read. They're chill on the surface, intelligent, and otherworldly. It can feel like you're dating a fairy, angel, or mermaid.

Aquarius is one of the most independent and progressive signs. It is the most likely to stick to being single, just after Virgo. Aquarius is known for beauty, creativity, and intelligence. It's the wild horse of the bunch. It can live in a world of ideas and a serene calm for most of its days. It isn't easy to date an Aquarius, not because they aren't amazing mates, but because they take a while to warm up to someone. They prefer to be your friend first. They prefer to hold off on experiencing major emotions because for them, it's unstable, powerful, and unsettling.

Build Trust with Aquarius

An Aquarius will be noticeable for its unusual ways of thinking. In some fashion they'll be weird. This doesn't mean 100% weird in every way imaginable, but they'll think outside the norm. They are innovative people; they love problem solving. They tend to be social butterflies, and grow from social experiences. They love the arts, sciences, religion, creativity, knowledge—they are an endless brain of ideas. They can easily only be in their heads and not in their bodies.

Trying to be sensual with an Aquarius from the beginning might not get you anywhere. They may just see it as cute, or at best, charming. Aquarius has good self control. It doesn't melt at the sight of a naked body or get distracted by a cute new co-worker. Instead it sees the mind and the soul of people first and is awakened later to the fact that someone is attractive physically.

Aquarius makes for an excellent romantic partner and parent, which is why they are slow to act. They are careful and methodical about their relationships. They absolutely hate heartbreak and experience it to the extreme. They are not so much frightened by rejection, as they constantly live in a state of shaking things up into a new order—they have a distaste for pain and for things falling apart. They want to avoid unnecessary disaster because it's time-consuming and a waste of their powerful emotions.

If you want to date an Aquarius, you have to build trust first. Figuring out what trust means to each Aquarius is no easy task. Be consistent, spend time with them frequently, text them, give them affirmations. Don't cheat or have a series of love interests on the side. An Aquarius will sniff it out. The Aquarius will do background checks on you, they'll understand the nuances of your words, and they'll not take cheating lightly. They want to know that you are committed before they jump in bed with you. They want to know you value them as much (if not more) than they do themselves.

Don't Move Too Fast

If you muddy up the waters with Aquarius too fast, don't be surprised if they respond with silence. Aquarius is prone to ghosting people that suddenly frighten its spirit. They don't like moving too fast, they haven't given their consent and they don't feel in synch... so this will scare them away. You have to be somewhat gentle with an Aquarius, or else they'll think you are trying to control them. Aquarius does not like, under any circumstance, to feel like they are being controlled. It's a highly free thinking, independent, and innovative spirit. It is the fixed sign of wind and intelligence. Trying to control its free thinking, body, or spirit will only result in it escaping you. Aquarius will speak its mind, it will tell you exactly what it's thinking and feeling, but if you cross certain boundaries, don't be surprised if it ends things completely without considering your thoughts and feelings.

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So how do you get it to stay? You can't control the Aquarius, but you can help build trust and a safe space for them to explore their feelings. An Aquarius needs time to think and introspect. If you take things slow, it can consider how it feels when you give them a hug, it can go through all the little things you've said from stellar compliments to the red flags. An Aquarius needs to know that if it's going to spend time with you—it can be itself.

Aquarius is constantly listening and getting information from you, so be careful not to info dump on the Aquarius and turn the sign into your best friend or therapist. That doesn't attract the Aquarius. It loves to be there to counsel you. Instead, check in on the Aquarius. Make it seem like you are in control of your emotions. Show them that if you were to break up, things will be okay and not a mess. Reveal to them that you have integrity, that you notice little things, that you are weird yourself, and you can show off a degree of randomness.

Aquarius is creative and inventive. They need a partner who is open to their weirdness.

Aquarius is creative and inventive. They need a partner who is open to their weirdness.

Touch and the Aquarius

When Aquarius warms up to you and you start dating, expect that it will have a great deal of variety to it. Whether Aquarius is spouting off various random ideas or takes you to a number of strange spots in town, Aquarius' randomness will leak all over the relationship. The Aquarius wants to make sure that you are okay with its weirdness as it has probably been discouraged from different people throughout its life for being odd.

Aquarius tends to like physical touch. For them, if you touch them subtly, it wakes them up. They are so deeply in their thoughts, that when someone touches them they can be quite sensitive to it. This means they'll either not like your touch and perhaps will ghost you... or they'll be keen to your touch. But be careful before you hit the bedroom—Aquarius needs some amount of commitment, and you do too if your dating an Aquarius, before taking things up a notch. Otherwise, this could be a recipe for disaster. If you haven't explored the Aquarius brain enough, then its self esteem isn't ready enough which could cause for the collapse of the relationship.

If the Aquarius is ready, then you should know by then that getting to know each other more physically is likely to amount in complete and utter insanity. The Aquarius is an open-minded, fun-loving, considerate, and intelligent sign. Apply those qualities into the bedroom and its likely to be a fun roller coaster. The Aquarius is known for being one of the sexiest signs... which is why when paired with the Scorpio the two tend to be like dynamite for each other. Some astrologists say the two signs are not meant to be, until they hit the sheets.

Spotting an Aquarius

  • Aquarius can be found in places with lots of mental or creative activity. Your bound to find them at colleges, concerts, museums, churches, science talks, or progressive and modern places.
  • Aquarius tends to have odd quirks whether with the way they speak, dress, or how extremely calm they are under pressure.
  • Think Luna Lovegood.
  • Often an animal or child whisperer.
  • They don't play by the cards everyone else does in a social situation.
  • They tend to hide that they are competitive or are not really that competitive to begin with.
  • They like to be relaxed, spouting off ideas, and have a certain warmth to them.
  • You might find them wandering around when everybody else is focused on some sort of problem or other event.
  • They tend to be dreamy and seem as if they live from the ether.
  • Someone who seems ravenously single for a long time, and mysteriously so since they seem like a strong candidate for being in a relationship, married, etc.

© 2016 Andrea Lawrence

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