7 Signs Your Ex Is Over You: How to Tell When It's Time to Let Go of Your Ex

Updated on June 19, 2017
thehands profile image

Jorge's relationship advice is based on experience and observation. He's seen many people—including himself—get seduced and hurt by love.

Signs Your Ex Has Moved On

You know it. Deep inside your heart, you know that you broke up for a reason. Still, you can't find it in yourself to let go of what you once had.

This is totally understandable, and is a common human emotion, whether you're the one who broke it off with your partner or you're the one who was rejected. It's normal to get attached to the life that you had with your ex.

It is true that there is sometimes a chance that you might get back together. If this is the case, the opportunity will present itself soon enough. In the meantime, though, if you want to put your mind at ease and tell yourself that it's safe to let go, take a look at these telltale signs your ex is over you and doesn't want to get back together:

Your ex, avoiding eye contact.
Your ex, avoiding eye contact.

1) Your ex avoids you in public.

Probably one of the biggest, glaring signs that your ex doesn't want to get back together is if he's avoiding you. It's possible that he could be avoiding you simply because he still loves you and it's painful to see you, but this probably isn't true.

Most of the time, if your ex doesn't go to social gatherings or changed up his daily routines to avoid bumping into you, it's because he wants to make a clean break.

2) Your ex won't answer your texts or calls.

Though it's smart for people to have no contact right after a breakup--especially if there are still feelings--most people can't resist the temptation if they're still in love. In modern times where talking to someone is as easy as sending a drunken text at 3 AM, your ex has ample opportunity to talk to you again if he wants to re-declare his love.

If your ex has ignored your texts and avoided sending any of his own, there's a good chance he's either over you or on his way to getting over you. Few of us have the discipline to ignore messages from someone we love just because "it's for the best." More likely, he just doesn't want to talk to you. It's over.

3) He's planning on moving soon.

Another giant, neon sign that screams, "He's over you!" is any plans that he has to move away from your city. If he's planning to move from the country, that's even more telling. The guy is ready to go on with his life.

Your brain might still be desperately trying to rationalize it. A lot of us do this when we're trying to make sense of a breakup. Part of you might think, "He's threatening to leave the country so that I'll appreciate him more and ask him to stay! He just wants to get back together!"

Sorry, but the chances are low that he's bluffing. If he's moving, he has let go of the relationship. You would do well to do the same; save yourself some anguish.

Your ex's luggage, filled with all kinds of things that have nothing to do with you.
Your ex's luggage, filled with all kinds of things that have nothing to do with you.

4) He's genuinely happy for you when you mention new partners.

Some people try to make their exes jealous by moving on quickly to other people--or at least pretending to. If you still have contact with your ex, try casually mentioning any dates you had lately. If the conversation goes like this...

"Yeah, so I've been seeing this great guy lately. His name is Christian. He works out and he's a mega-billionaire. He also has a nice assortment of leather whips. I think I found The One."

"Wow, I'm so happy for you! You see, what did I tell you? The right guy was out there for you; you just had to find him."

...then he's over you.

Yes, there's a chance that he's just trying to appear strong, but if you were with him for any length of time, you should be able to tell if he's faking it. It might be ambiguous over text, but it should be pretty clear if you're looking at his facial expression in person.

Does he appear happy for you? Does he seem almost excited that you've found someone else because you're no longer hung up over him?

That's a definite sign that he's over you. Hardly anyone is selfless enough to be excited about the one they love getting with someone else.

When It's Over...Is It Really Over?

Are you still in love with your ex?

See results

5) He's dating someone else.

Similarly, if your ex has moved onto someone else, then he's probably over you. It could also be that he still has feelings for you and is trying to quell them with someone new, but this on its own is a sign that he's ready to at least try to move on.

At any rate, if your ex has a new partner, don't be a douche and try to break them up. If he wants you back, he will come back to you on his own.

6) He's made a major life decision that doesn't include you.

Has he joined the monkhood? Did he decide to enlist in the military? Did he become a Scientologist?

Any of these random decisions that could affect the rest of his life and push him further away from you are a sign that he doesn't plan on getting back together. It may be hard to watch him change in ways that you know will make you less compatible, but this might just be his path in life. It could be that he was holding back while you were together, and finally he is free to be himself and grow as a person the way he was meant to.

Try to be happy for him.

What your face should look like when you're happy for your ex.
What your face should look like when you're happy for your ex.

7) He seems genuinely happier without you.

If he seems happier and more excited about his life now that you're not in it, this is a sign that your ex is over you. The chances are nil that he'll want to get back together if his world is honestly brighter on the other side of the relationship.

Don't let this bring you done. It doesn't mean that you're a bad person or that you won't make someone else happy. It simply means that the relationship wasn't compatible, and that you probably both will be happier letting it go.

Try to think back to the things that you felt you couldn't do while in the relationship. A lot of those things might be avenues in life that you need to explore to personally grow. It might be a good thing that you're no longer together. Just like your ex, you might be able to find a greater happiness if you can only look past the temporary pain of a lost relationship.

Best of all, you'll be open to finding someone new who actually wants to be with you.

Your Ex Has Moved On

If your ex has exhibited most or all of these signs, it's extremely likely that he has moved on with his life. While this is a painful thing to face sometimes, the sooner that you face it, the better.

When you learn to let go, it will be like a huge weight has fallen from your shoulders. You'll see the world differently and allow yourself the possibility of finding love again. Until then, you'll be mentally tied to someone who is over you and really doesn't want to be with you.

The Signs That It's Over

Does your ex exhibit any of the above signs that he's over you?

See results

This article is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge. Content is for informational or entertainment purposes only and does not substitute for personal counsel or professional advice in business, financial, legal, or technical matters.

© 2017 Jorge Vamos


Submit a Comment
  • dashingscorpio profile image


    3 years ago from Chicago

    1. He or she dumped you!

    That's usually the first sign that someone is over you.

    Keep things in perspective and stop romanticizing the past!

    In order for your (ex) to have been "the one" they would have had to see (you) as being "the one"! At the very least a "soul-mate" is someone who actually WANTS to be with you! (And vice versa)

    "Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."

    - Oscar Wilde

    If someone dumped you they don't think you're all that "special".

    Thankfully there are over (7 Billion) other people!

    Every ending is a new beginning!


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, pairedlife.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://maven.io/company/pages/privacy

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)