12 Reasons Why Break-Ups Occur

Updated on December 13, 2016
Miss-Adventures profile image

My passion is writing about love, sex, dating, and relationships. I write based on my own personal experiences and those that I relate to.

There are so many reasons why couples call it quits—the list goes on and on! Besides the obvious reasons—physical and/or mental abuse, lying or cheating, etc.—when a break-up is initiated, it usually happens because two people are not compatible for the long term. Here’s a short list to explain why:

1. “What I found endearing, I now find annoying.” Whatever qualities first attracted you to this person, now repulse and irritate you. It feels as if everything your partner does frustrates you—including talking.

2. “I feel as if I’m dating someone else.” The honeymoon stage is definitely over and your significant other has become comfortable enough to reveal his or her true personality. Let’s just say this “new” personality should’ve just stayed hidden…forever.

3. “My significant other is always working.” When the person you are dating consistently puts work before you, they are not ready for a serious relationship. I believe that you should love what you do, but do you really want to marry someone who’s first love in their job, not you?

4. “I can’t remember last time we had sex.” This is when your sex life is going down the drain, fast! This usually happens when your partner has either let themselves go in the grooming department—or has gained way more than a few pounds—causing their previous sex appeal to become a lot less attractive. Hmmm, and they wonder why you continue to have a reoccurring headache?

5. “Was he/she always this lazy?” When you start to feel like your partner’s maid—verses a loving, caring boyfriend or girlfriend—this can get really old, really quick. No one likes to consistently pick up after someone, especially without a simple “thank you” or acknowledgment.

6. “We are just not on the same life-page anymore.” You have mentally and emotionally grown apart, and at this point, probably physically too. This usually happens when two people start dating at a young age, have been dating for a long time, and before committing to each other (for a lifetime) never asked signification relationship-altering questions: financial issues, political opinions, religious views, family values, career goals, etc.

7. “All we do is sit around and watch T.V.; we never go out anymore.” Clearly, romance has left the building, the “spark” is gone, and laziness has taken over. Don’t get me wrong, staying home, making dinner (or ordering in) and watching movies has its time and place. However, when staying home becomes a weekend occurrence and cuddling changes into sitting at a distance…Houston, there is a problem.

8. “My significant other now gets upset when I go out with my friends.” The confidence and attraction you once felt has disintegrated—due to jealousy. Continual insecurity is exhausting to deal with and can definitely make the person you are with less charming. Insecurity is not the new sexy!

9. “I don’t feel appreciated.” This is when you are with someone who doesn’t seem to care if you are together…or not. They stop doing the little things to show appreciation. When someone stops putting in the effort, it’s definitely time to move on.

10. “I think I’m dating an alcoholic.” Drinking on occasion has become a daily routine with your significant other, and it doesn’t stop with just one drink. You might want to figure out where your nearest AA is and take a much needed sober break from this relationship.

11. “He/She is Crazy!” This happens when your partner displays two personality traits that usually will come out when he or she is intoxicated. Underlying bipolar characteristics and anger issues come to the forefront. Either way, the noticeable character difference is uncomfortable to deal with. You should never feel as if you are dating two completely different people—especially one that is abusive.

12. “I never see my significant other anymore.” When someone stops making time for you, this is a huge, HUGE red flag that there is a loss of interest. If he or she was able to make time for you in the beginning of the relationship, why not now? It’s not rocket science—he or she has emotionally moved on, and you need to do the same.

These are just a few reasons why break-ups occur, but I’m sure there are many, many more that can also be justifiable! Remember, break-ups do happen for a reason and if the person you are with isn’t right, there is someone else who is. However, if you are hanging on for the wrong reasons—because you’re lonely and you need the comfort—you’re just prolonging finding the one.


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      Jacob 5 months ago

      ms Bailey. what about disrespectful breakups?

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      Sandra 3 years ago

      You're the one with the brains here. I'm wanihctg for your posts.

    • Miss-Adventures profile image

      Stephanie Bailey 4 years ago from Denver

      Thank you Mary and DDE for your feedback and for taking the time to read.

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Informative , useful, interesting about why break ups occur, tips which can affect man couples.

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      Mary Roberts-Bailey 4 years ago

      Funny, wise and insightful. Take notice everyone who is dating and act accordingly if any of this applies to you.

    • Miss-Adventures profile image

      Stephanie Bailey 4 years ago from Denver

      Thank you dashingscorpio. Every break-up is a definitely a learning experience. :)

    • Miss-Adventures profile image

      Stephanie Bailey 4 years ago from Denver

      Thank you dashingscorpio. Every break-up is a definitely a learning experience. :)

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 4 years ago

      Excellent! Voted up and Awesome!

      Essentially the bottom line is we come to realization that the person we are with is not "the right one" for us or we no longer want the same things.

      There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships. We either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. One man's opinion! :-)