What Are You Settling For?
You're Worth It
What are you settling for?
Why do we as women feel like we are not worth anything or worth having the man we deserve? I have had countless friends whom I have talked to and they feel like they don’t deserve the man they were with because of their past. I have seen so many women be abused mentally, verbally, physically or all three because they are afraid to move on. They are wrong! You are wrong! Your past does not define you and God does not hold grudges against you just because you have a spot on our past. I am a witness that he does not hold grudges and he does not want to punish you. I am NOT a relationship expert; I learned from being in relationships, and having guys who were just honest with me about the way guys think. My only goal is to share my experiences in relationships and to help someone to not make the same mistakes I made.
Do you feel trapped by your past?
Everyone has a page out of their past that they would not like to read out loud. I know there are plenty of things I wish I could go back and do over, but I know that will never happen so I had to start forgiving myself. I had to learn how to stop attracting those type of men and gain the strength to know I am worth more than a simple hit it and quit it. I had a habit of choosing men who I knew were not good for me, but simply because they were “bad boys” I wanted them. I wish I could erase that chapter of my life, but if I would not have gone through that then I would not have the man I am with now to show me what a good man is.
Do not keep the same mind frame as before
I would never have the man I have now if I would have kept that same mindset that all men are the same and I can’t get out of this repeated cycle of being abused. Even when I first met my husband he would tell me he could tell I had been through a lot of bad relationships because I would talk a certain way and I had a different mindset. I also thought because of my past I did not deserve a good man or I wasn’t worthy of being with a good man. I had been mistreated so long verbally that I did not deserve any better. My self-esteem and my heart was broken. I felt worthless and I felt ashamed because I had did so many things in my past and I felt like I deserved the men I was with at the time. I did not feel like a Queen and I had lowered my standards just to say I had someone on my side.
It is okay to be alone and heal
Trust me I know what it's like to want to be with someone just because you don't want to be alone. I know what it’s like to date someone just because all your friends have someone and you do not. No Queen, you can no longer allow this. It’s okay to be single! It’s okay to sleep alone, to go shopping alone, to eat alone, and to just be alone in general. How can you be with someone else if you do not like spending time by yourself? You are WORTH it! You are worth being treated like a queen; you are worth a man opening the door for you and telling you you’re beautiful. You are worth true love and worth being someone’s everything. I can tell you this all day, but the question is do YOU believe it? Are you willing to change your mindset? Are you willing to go through the work and the healing process??