Is Your Body Warning You That He's Not Right For You?

Updated on October 17, 2016
Miss-Adventures profile image

My passion is writing about love, sex, dating, and relationships. I write based on my own personal experiences

Many times when we are in unhappy, unhealthy, or stressful relationships our bodies will warn us...

When you first enter a relationship that you are happily excited about the whole world can see this from miles away. You uncontrollably smile, there is a glow that radiates from your entire body and you have a skip in your step (and possibly a twirl). Also, you will have a more positive attitude, you might even dress better, be in better shape, and sleep more restfully than you ever have. Basically, your body is screaming to the world and to yourself that you are happy. Yay!

Well...your body will also do the reverse when you are in a relationship that is effecting your life in a negative way.

Ladies, our bodies are truly our temples...

If you are paying close attention your body will not only tell you when you are happy, it will warn you in advance when you are unhappy—often before our hearts and minds will.

As your body starts to realize that your relationship isn't right for you, there will be small, but obvious signs. There won't be as many smiles radiating off your face, there will be stress in your voice, and you will have more complaints about your relationship versus positive feedback. Yikes!

If you continue to stay in an unhealthy relationship the warning signs from your body will continue to get stronger. You might have tension and stress in your body, back pain, excessive weight gain, excessive weight loss, headaches and restless sleep. Are you listening to your body or are you in denial?

Although realizing how potentially awful a relationship actually is can often take a lot longer for our hearts and minds to fully process, our bodies will often warn us as time goes on.

Let's be honest...

Most of us have been guilty of staying in relationships with men that we knew deep down inside were not making us completely happy.

Of course with all relationships, there will be unhappy moments that will cause stress and upset—since no relationship is perfect. However, how you both work through those moments, as well as if those difficult moments outweigh the good ones, will ultimately be the deciding factor if your relationship is a healthy one or not.

Unfortunately, for many women, the very thought of being alone or "starting all over again" is so scary for them that they would rather stay in a relationship that is making them miserable (oh dear!). Even if there are obvious red flags in front of them that are screaming to end things—and run for the hills—often their egos (and again fear) will convince them to stay.

Listen up ladies...

Your purpose in life is not to change a man who doesn't want to be changed. Yes, even with the right guy there will be some changes you will both make in order to better not only yourselves, but also the relationship.

However there is a big difference between being with a man who clearly wants to work on himself with you versus being with a guy who has zero interest in making any improvement. For instance, stop thinking that you have the power to suddenly change a cheating man’s ways...you don't and usually the stress of trying to change him will show in your everyday health.

Here's the thing, the body never lies...

Even if you are telling lies to yourself and your friends about how great (you wish) your relationship is—no matter how much you sugar coat this fantasy, your body will reveal the truth (unless you are dealing with a medical issue).

I have a close friend who has always been on the thinner side of the weight spectrum...until she remained in a negative marriage. When she first entered the relationship she was happy and in great shape. As several issues started to arise in her relationship, she started to gain weight—excessively. Oh my!

My friend tried very hard to not complain about how stressed out her relationship was, convincing all of her friends and family members that she was happy. Well, her body was definitely telling her differently.

The extra pounds she put on—again, not weight from being happy—became so excessive that she gained over thirty pounds. This weight was not due to over eating. Her ex-husband was not only mentally and verbally abusive, he was also physically abusive. As her unhappiness and stress started to take over, so did the weight that attached all over her body.

Finally after having an honest and open talk with herself as well as her family and friends, she left her ex-husband and all that extra weight after time vanished from her body—without her exercising or watching what she ate.

The only thing my friend did differently to lose the weight, was getting rid of the excess negativity and stress—her ex-husband—out of her life. Yay!

Ladies, our bodies will always speak louder to us than the red flags that we are choosing to ignore. Really look at yourself in the mirror. Do you look and feel happy? We only have one body, one life. Why waste your precious time in a negative relationship that could cause you potential health issues down the road? You deserve without a question or doubt to be with a man who not only makes your body feel great but also you mind and soul.

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    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 

      2 years ago

      Personally speaking I'm always in my best shape when I'm single! LOL!

      Relationships have a way of disturbing one's set routines. Only the most disciplined individuals maintain a steady weight in long term relationships.

      Every relationship especially in the U.S. seems to center around eating, going out to eat, and parties consuming calories via alcohol and soda.

      Oftentimes if a couple has children they'll seek out places like Golden Corral and other "all you can eat buffets" or Little Cesar Pizza to get more bang for their buck when it comes to eating.

      Generally speaking men have worse eating habits than women. A lot of women who were content having salads and wraps find themselves gradually eating more pizza, chili dogs, and bacon cheese burgers as they lounge around the house with him watching TV.

      It's rare that one sees a couple in a long-term relationship where both people remain fit or hit the gym together. Couples tend to "relax".

      We eat because we're happy and then we eat because we're depressed over gaining weight. Usually it's just 2-3lbs per month.

      Hardly noticeable but over a period of 10 months that adds up to 20-30lbs!

      Ironically the minute the relationship ends everyone rushes back to the gym, reinvest in their appearance with a new haircut, clothes, or whatever.

      However when they find "new love" the cycle repeats itself!

      I have yet to meet anyone who lost weight in a long-term relationship.

      Maybe it's a combination of human nature to eat more when you're with someone and become less physically active or the fact as time passes our metabolism eventually slows down whether we're in a relationship or not.

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