Fernando is a millennial university student who writes real articles for real people.
I've never known to read a woman's mind. They're mysterious. They're sensitive, emotional, and strong. And I just couldn't catch on.
Women need space. They are delicate creatures that demand respect. They need space.
I've almost screwed up my relationship by not giving space. I learned to set boundaries. It's also important to know when to back off.
Regardless of what situation you are in, I hope you can learn from my experiences.
1. Don't Be Needy and Give Her Space in a Relationship
She needs space. A beautiful relationship needs space. Everyone needs space.
It's tempting to send her another message. It's best not to. Unless you know she's okay with it. But that's exactly what I did. And I'm glad she still thought I was cool. But not every woman will react the same. We don't want to become boring.
A lot of men will argue,
"Who gives a shit? If she's not into me, I'll just find another. Life's too short."
There is an obvious problem with that mentality.
The problem isn't the girl. The problem is you.
Don't be a douchebag. Don't be a hard shell. Don't be a coconut. Be you.
This is the exact advice I gave myself. Because, unfortunately, I wasn't the best boyfriend. Everyone needs space. Even her.
Be real with yourself: you're not perfect and she isn't, either. But if you're like me you get a sparkle in your eye looking at her. So how do we keep the good going great?
2. Listen to her
If she's feeling low, listen to her. If she's having an amazing day, listen to her. Regardless of what's going on in her life, more than likely she wants your attention. I made the mistake of not listening enough. A woman wants attention. She wants to be heard. She wants to know she's not going through it alone.
3. Don't step on her toes.
Don't piss her off. Stop arguing with her. Don't tell her how to do things. This doesn't apply for everyone but it's universal. Trust me, this helps.
4. Respect the boundaries.
Self-explanatory. Keep it classy. Save the ranch dressing for the hotel room.
5. Don't be annoying.
I found it incredible that being in a relationship doesn't mean she needs to listen to you all the time. I suppose this is one of those things you learn from experience.
6. Comfort her
Remind her that you're there for her. Comfort is all she needs after a long day. Pay attention to how she's feeling and respond accordingly. Women love back rubs. My woman especially loves head massages and fingers running through her hair.
7. Don't Be Pushy
Pushy guys get pushy responses. This is a big no. Don't be pushy.
8. Don't overwhelm her
Timing is everything. Your requests can wait. Give her breathing room. She’ll benefit by focusing on what matters most to her.
9. Adapt to Her Needs
You need to find a compromise in the relationship in order to make things work for both of you. But, it's increasingly important to learn when to let her have her way. Even better if you can adapt to her ever-changing needs. My girl happens to work too much, and I give her the time she needs with her family. That's one adaptation I've made.
10. Pay Attention to Her Life
Pay attention to what she's doing. Observe how she's feeling. Perhaps she just got off work. She must be tired. Offer her a back rub. Offer to do the dishes, or to cook her a meal.
Tend to her needs. See how she's doing. You can't go wrong here. If you do, you're a dumbass -- like me. Because if you were paying attention up there, I didn't pay attention to her at first either!
Bottom Line: Give Your Girlfriend Space
Giving Space Review
- Don't bug the crap out of her. Give her space.
- Don't text her so much. Your girl needs space. A text occasionally is great.
- You can't miss someone that is always there. Once again, give her space!
- Stop insisting. Stop pestering. Stop being annoying.
- Let her handle herself. If she asks you for help, bulldoze her problems with ease.
Keep things fresh. Do not stale your relationship. Practice these guidelines with repetition. Execute with style, finesse, and variety.
All it really takes is a little space. She's worth it. Especially if you love her.
© 2018 Ferny Vise
J on September 15, 2019:
Fernando, I just found this article, while I been working on the things you put in this article before finding it. As being in a relationship that kinda became stale and am trying to make it better again, in these situations can they comeback to the way they were before, If I follow this guidelines?
Ferny Vise (author) from San Francisco, CA on August 15, 2019:
Thanks, Andrew. Hope all goes well!
Andrew on July 19, 2019:
i'm glad i found this article before things got to worse. Thank you so much
Denise McGill from Fresno CA on May 11, 2019:
What great advice! Thanks for sharing.
Ferny Vise (author) from San Francisco, CA on May 09, 2019:
Thanks for the reply, Jeremy. I'm glad it has helped you. The intention behind this article was to help others like you!
I have also remodeled the whole article to make it more reader friendly and to the point.
Let me know what you think,
Jeremy on May 01, 2019:
This article answered so many questions and made me view my relationship differently. I know now how crucial giving space is and it’s something I’ve lacked for most my relationships. I hope this article helps mine out and all the others that seek the same thing. Thank you again for this, it’s very insightful.
Cedric Kabuchu on January 07, 2019:
Very encouraging and wise words.
Luis Echeverria on May 09, 2018:
I really liked this article